What the Future Holds
by Tihana
Summary: A Tony and Michelle story, post season 3. Reviews are always appreciated.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** _I don't own any of the 24 characters because if I did, Tony and Michelle's story would've ended with season 4. All the other characters that don't appear in 24 are my own creation. Any similarity to either other fictitious characters or real people is pure coincidence. None of my ideas are based on the works of other, any similarity is also coincidence._

**Author note:** _I would like to thank a friend of mine for all the help with this story, without his beta reading and encouragement this story never would've seen the light of day._

**Setting:** _Michelle is sitting in the car outside of the prison. Almost 8 months passed since the events of season 3._

Michelle didn't expect this day to happen so soon even though to her the past months seemed like a century. Today was the day when Tony would be getting out of prison and even though it wouldn't be until 4pm, she had been waiting since the early morning. Michelle couldn't wait to see him and have him back in her arms even though she didn't know if that's what would happen. That was one of the reasons why Michelle had come so early, she kept hoping that by her being there something would change and the events of last 3 months wouldn't be the same.

Closing her eyes, Michelle started to think about everything that had happened.

The first thought that came to her mind was the nightmare that kept waking her up. Each time it did the empty side of their bed made her realize it was reality and she would cry herself back to sleep.

That nightmare was the day Tony went to prison.

The minute her memories came back to her, it seemed like it was all happening in that moment again.

_The trial was short; it was really just a hearing to determine the length of his sentence. Tony was found guilty of treason and sent to prison for 20 years. Jack had immediately objected to that decision but at that point he couldn't do anything. All he and Michelle could do was watch helplessly while Tony was led away._

_Tony and Michelle were given a few minutes alone in one of the courthouse's holding rooms to say goodbye. Michelle came in first and sat down, feeling as though she would collapse. She was crying and couldn't think straight or believe what just happened. Her husband was going away; they won't be together for next 20 years. _

_A few moments later Tony came in, still handcuffed. The guard that was with him removed the handcuffs and the moment he did, Tony hurried to Michelle and knelt down in front of her. Placing his arms around her waist, he pulled her as close to him as he could. _

_Michelle hugged him tightly burying her face in his neck, crying even harder._

_Caressing her back, Tony tried to calm down his wife. He kept saying that everything would be okay. Through a stream of tears, with her face still buried in his neck, she asked how it could possibly be okay. _

"_You'll see, as long as you're alive and well, I'll be fine and one day something will happen that will make everything else right, just be patient and you'll see," he said._

"_I won't be alright until I'm back with you, I can't live without you and I don't know how I will survive one day away from you. It would be better if I had died," Michelle replied._

_On that Tony moved away from her slightly, took her face in his hands, wiped her tears away with his thumbs, and kissed her deeply and passionately. _

_When their lips separated Tony looked into her eyes. _

"_I don't want to hear that kind of talk again; the only thing that will keep me going is knowing that you're out there alive and well. You are my life, and as long as you're okay, I'm okay." he said before kissing her again._

_His kisses and words calmed Michelle down for a moment. She tried to smile but couldn't; she just looked at him and kept caressing his face. Tony still had her face cupped in his hands and they looked deeply in each other's eyes for a few moments before hugging again. They remained hugged, without saying anything else, until Jack came to the door and told them it's time. Michelle remained sitting because she didn't trust her legs. Tony got up; kissed the top of her head and said, "I love you baby, I love you more than anything. Remember that no matter what happens, my love for you will never change, no matter what future brings." _

_Michelle started crying again before saying, "I love you too, more than my life; I will always love you, no matter what." _

_Tony kissed the top of her head again and caressed her face before walking over to Jack and telling him, "take care of Michelle with your life, make sure nothing happens to her."_

"_I will and I'll find a way to get you out of prison" Jack replied. _

"_I know you will try," Tony said, "but the most important thing to me is Michelle and her safety. Nothing else matters." _

_Jack assured him that he'd take care of her and they hugged. _

_The guard came into the room, placed the cuffs back on Tony's hands and then took him away. Tony looked back one more time and whispered "I love you" to Michelle who just sat there looking hypnotized. When the doors closed she began sobbing. Jack took Michelle home and gave her a strong sedative to help her sleep…_

Those memories brought tears to Michelle's eyes. She wiped them away and looked outside the window and then looked down on her watch, still 4 hours to go.

_Everyday of the first four months of Tony's imprisonment was the same for Michelle; she lived from one visit to another. Michelle wasn't allowed to see Tony during the first month, those were the rules of the prison. She thought she'd die during that time. Up to that point Tony and Michelle hadn't been apart for more than a day since the beginning of their relationship which began a day after the nuclear bomb day. _

_Thankfully Jack had some connections in that prison so he was able to put Tony in a cell that was separated from others. Jack made sure he wasn't mixed with other prisoners because most of them either resented Tony for being a traitor or were in there thanks to him; both Jack and Michelle were afraid for Tony's life and Michelle was very grateful that Jack had these strings he could pull. Jack also made sure that the guard watching Tony was a friend he trusted not to harm Tony in any way. Not all guards were that way, some felt the same anger as some prisoners because Tony was considered a traitor and Jack wasn't sure they wouldn't harm him. For now Tony was safe and that thought comforted Michelle a bit._

_During the first two weeks all Michelle did was sit in their empty house, looking at their things, and thinking of the life they shared together and lost. It was hard for her not to cry with all the memories that surrounded her. When Tony went to prison, CTU sent his things to their home; she placed the box next to the door, where it remained. Michelle didn't move a single thing, she left everything exactly the way Tony left it the day before that horrible event, even the TV-guide they left on the coffee table the prior night. _

_Tony and Michelle didn't find anything interesting on the TV so they went to bed early, but they didn't sleep very much._

Tears came to her eyes once more and she wiped them again. The thought of their last night together brought on some happy memories and Michelle was worried that they were their last.

_That night Michelle was worried if she would get the job at Langley. She wanted it for multiple reasons, but the biggest one was the fact that working with Tony was something she loved more than anything. Her job was even more special to her because she could do it side-by-side with her husband; it was part of their relationship and the more time passed, the more they loved it. _

_Michelle didn't care about her job, that move was too big for him to miss, she would go with him no matter what. Being a housewife for a while di__dn't bother her so long as they were together, because she had other ideas on her mind in that case. But the thought of not being able to work with him anymore saddened her because it meant they would be apart for most of the day and being together was another big plus of working in the same office. _

_Tony knew that, he loved it as much as she did for the same reasons. He made his decision long ago but he didn't tell it to Michelle yet. He decided to wait until they heard from Langley because it all depended on their answer and Tony knew she'd object to his decision if the answer was no. Tony had talked about it with Michelle so many times by that point and told her everything would work out, that people at Langley would be stupid not to take her. However, Tony knew his wife and he knew she would keep worrying about it so he decided to keep her mind occupied with other things and keep her relaxed, especially that night, the night before they would find out. Since there was nothing on the TV, he told Michelle that he had other ways of distracting her from Langley. Tony smiled, got up, lifted his wife off the couch, and carried her to their bed. They made love for hours._

Michelle's eyes were filled with tears again. The thought of not getting the job at Langley for both of those reasons worried her for weeks and now that seemed so insignificant to her. Since it happened, all Michelle could think about was, if she had known that night what would happen the following day, she would've taken Tony and hid with him where they could never be found.

_Their house was on the beach; Tony built it for them on their favorite spot. The little cove was a spot they came to on the first date Tony was able to walk completely without crutches, two weeks after the nuclear bomb day. It was his favorite spot, where he'd come to relax; Michelle was the first person he brought there. She fell in love with it the second she saw it, they even spent the night there, talking and looking at the stars. A month later when Tony heard the spot was being sold he bought it immediately and built their dream house._

_Spending nights on the back porch, which had great view of on the ocean, was something Tony and Michelle enjoyed. They had a deckchair for two on it and would snuggle up close and talk late into the night. On many summer nights, they would sleep on it or on the beach right below. The night Tony went to prison, Michelle closed the curtains and didn't set foot outside again. _

_Jack kept his promise to Tony, he came to visit Michelle everyday during those two weeks she spent inside the house. Jack was worried about her, she didn't talk much and didn't let him open the curtains even though she normally loved the sun and the view before and kept them opened all the time. All she did was ask about Tony. Jack told her that Tony wanted her to be happy and live her life; he wouldn't want her cooped up inside the house. Michelle said that she can't do anything at the moment, but told Jack she'd think about it. _

_Soon after that conversation Michelle decided to go back to work. She was still distressed by the whole situation but thought Jack might have a point and that working could distract her from her dark thoughts. Michelle had so many in her mind that she desperately needed something to divert her attention, at least for a few hours a day. _

_Even though part of her still loved it, Michelle hated her job because it separated her from the only thing that really mattered to her, her husband. Michelle didn't feel like finding a new one, not yet anyway. She didn't care where she worked as long as it kept her busy. Her job wasn't a big part of her life anymore; it was just something to help the time pass by faster. One thing Michelle knew however was that she wanted to get out of CTU-Los Angeles. _

_When Michelle decided to go back to work she called Division and requested a reassignment from CTU. Fortunately no one wanted to lose her so Michelle was transferred to Division. _

_Thankfully Hammond was no longer there; he had been implicated in some shady business and was shipped to CTU-Juneau __which also happened to be where Carrie was stationed shortly after the nuclear bomb._

_Michelle was happy to hear that because she felt like she'd choke him if he ever appeared in front of her eyes. Division offered her a promotion but__it required Michelle to attend two months of job training in Seattle__. At first Michelle refused because she didn't want to be apart from her husband for that long but the offer remained opened. _

_The next few weeks went by faster; there was a lot of work to be done and Michelle was glad because it kept her busy. She would spend 14 hours a day working; the rest of the day she felt as miserable, __finding it hard to eat or sleep_

_Another thing Jack arranged was a separated room for Tony and Michel__le when she visited the prison. A guard would watch them from outside but they still had more privacy than they would under normal circumstances. _

_When the day of her first visit came, Michelle couldn't wait to see her husband and have him hold her._

_When the doors opened and Tony came in, Michelle froze; she thought she was dreaming. Tony just stood there for a few seconds looking at her before they hugged and both started crying. Fifteen minutes later they separated only so much to be able to look at one other. Tony looked at his wife, measuring her. He saw how sad she was, and how weak she looked. Tony asked her if she was eating or sleeping at all, Michelle wanted to lie to him but couldn't. _

"_I'm trying," she said, "but it's hard. You know I can't sleep without you and you spoiled me with your cooking. Gina is trying, she comes once a day, everyday, but you know I like your cooking better." Michelle smiled a bit, Tony did too, but he didn't find it funny. _

"_I'm worried about you; you're ruining yourself like this. Baby, you'll become ill, you can't do this to yourself. I'm glad to hear Gina is there for you, so you at least eat one meal a day, but that's not enough. You look like you haven't closed your eyes in ages. Baby, you have to sleep, please. Michelle, please promise me you'll start sleeping more and eating when Gina isn't making you," Tony said._

"_I don't expect you to jump for joy but I can't look at you like this. I hardly recognize you. You were always strong and look at you now. Baby, you look so weak and tired. You know how much I love you and how worried I am about you as it is, if not for anything else, do it for me, please sweetheart."_

"_I promise I'll try. I don't want to be like this, I don't recognize myself either. _

_I was never like this before; you know that the best. But I feel like a truck ran over me. I don't feel like smiling or being happy; I have no reason to. With everything that happened in the past month and a half and with you in here… I just can't help feeling and acting like this. I keep thinking about you, about that hotel and…" She stopped herself from going further, her eyes filling with tears even more, biting her lower lip. She took a deep breath. _

"_I just can't live my life like nothing happened. I know how much you want me to be happy and calm and I promise you, sweetheart, I'll__ do my best to make that happen. I promise to be stronger for you, for both of us. It will take me longer without you by my side, comforting me, but I promise I'll do it." Michelle said looking into his eyes and smiling a bit, assuring him that she will do her best. _

_That calmed Tony down a bit. Even though, it was hurting him to see how much Michelle was suffering and he knew she was hiding __most of it from him. Tony hated the whole situation, he loved his wife more than anything else and he wasn't able to be there for her in the moments when she needed him the most._

_But Tony knew she's a strong woman; she was one of the strongest people he ever met, if not the strongest. He also knew how much she loves him and that's why he was certain she would try her best and in time get better; that was the only thing he could've hoped for at that point._

_Tony promised himself that he'd make sure she's calmer and a bit happier during these visits. He needed her as much as she needed him but he couldn't burden her with even more problems when she had so many on her mind already._

_The rest of the visit they spent kissing and holding each other as close as possible. When the visiting time was over, they had hard time letting go of each other, but the guard took Tony away and Michelle left feeling all alone again._

_Michelle wanted to tell her husband everything that was going on in her mind, Tony was the only person she could really talk to, who would listen to her, understand her and find the right words to comfort her. He knew how to make her feel better in a second. Tony was her strength as she was his; but she couldn't tell him, not while he was in prison. She wanted those visits to be as happy as they could be under the circumstances. Michelle didn't really care what happened to her, but she wanted to calm him down; the last thing she wanted was for her husband to worry about her even more than he already was. After that visit Michelle decided to do her best to make sure Tony wasn't as worried about her. She decided to try eating and sleeping and at least appear stronger in front of him for the time being until she, hopefully, starts feeling better. _

_The next months passed mostly the same way._

_Even though Michelle was still feeling miserable, the work kept her busy and it helped to keep her mind off of everything for at least part of each day. _

_No matter how strong Michelle was, everything that was going on in her life and in her mind kept her awake at night, and didn't let her be as strong as she used to be or wanted to be. But Michelle decided not to let anyone see how miserable she still was. _

_During the time of her husband's imprisonment, Michelle cried more than in her entire life. She didn't smile or socialize with her co-workers; she felt as though she didn't recognize herself. At work everyone thought she was cold and rigid because no one really knew her and didn't see how much she was still hurting, but she didn't really care what they thought. In front of those who knew her, Michelle kept her façade and tried acting a bit more like her old self so they wouldn't know what's going on. Michelle didn't let anyone know including Jack and Tony. She decided to let everyone think that she's doing better than she actually was; only she knew what was in her mind and heart and how much it all still hurt. Even though she was mostly miserable about her husband and his state worried and saddened her, the other things on her mind didn't let her mind be at peace. _

_Aside from nightmares about Tony, Michelle suffered from nightmares about the Chandler Plaza Hotel. She couldn't get out of her mind all those people dying in front of her eyes. Michelle kept feeling guilty about being the one who took CTU team inside in the first place and being the one among the few who survived. On top of that was Tony's imprisonment, it all merged into one big nightmare that tortured her. Even though she wasn't really guilty of either of those things, she couldn't help feeling guilty about it. Both kept Michelle awake at night and prevented her from living in any kind of peace._

_Michelle tried eating and sleeping more so Tony wouldn't worry as much, but it wasn't going well. She would barely eat anything aside from the meal Gina would force her to eat and even in front of her she acted like she's eating with more of an appetite because Michelle knew Gina would tell Tony, but in time Michelle managed to force herself to eat something aside from that meal. It wasn't easy, but she did it. _

_Sleeping, however, was a different story. No matter how hard she tried, Michelle couldn't sleep for more than few hours. _

_She would take some sleeping pills the night before the visit to help her sleep so Tony wouldn't notice how miserable she still was about the whole situation. _

_Even though Michelle didn't look as tired, Tony wasn't convinced. He could see that she wasn't any better. Tony didn't say anything though because he saw she's trying and he thought she'll get better and better in time. _

_Tony asked her to tell him about her day and Michelle told him that the work is keeping her busy. He was glad she was working because he thought she needed other things on her mind. Michelle smiled a bit and said "You're always on my mind and in my heart, but the work is helping._ _The long hours without you by my side seem to go by a little bit faster, though not nearly fast enough."_

_Michelle, however, didn't tell him about the promotion she was offered, it wasn't an option anymore. She had no intention of leaving for two months and not seeing him. The only time Michelle was really happy was when she was with her husband and she didn't want to give that up, no matter what._

_Three months ago, however, things changed. The day before the visit Michelle received a phone call from prison, it was Tony, the moment she heard his voice she froze, scared that something happened to him because he had never called before. Tony sounded tired; he said that nothing was wrong but his tone was clearly different._

"_I don't want to see you; I don't want you to come to the prison anymore."_

_Michelle couldn't believe her ears, "Why? What's wrong, did something happen?" _

"_No, I just don't want to see you anymore. I want to be able to survive this whole thing and seeing you is making it very hard. It reminds me of what I lost and I can't deal with it anymore. I can't keep seeing you and you can't keep living from one visit to another either. We both need some distance."_

"_I don't, all I need is you…" Michelle replied._

"_No Michelle, you have your life, your work, and things that will keep you going even though it sounds hard right now. I know you'll be fine and I want you to be. I want you to be happy and keep going, live your life. I don't blame you for anything; nothing will make me happier than knowing you're okay. But I need to be away from you because I can't keep being reminded of my past and you are the constant reminder of it. I love you and because I want to keep you and the life we had in a good memory, I can't see you anymore."_

"_Tony, please, don't talk like this…"_

"_Michelle, I know you love me, and if you do, you'll respect my wishes, please, just stay away from me, let me try to find some peace in all of this…" he said before hanging up._

_Michelle remained shocked; she couldn't believe what just happened; none of it sounded real to her. She knew him far too well, better than she knew herself. Michelle knew something was wrong, but couldn't do anything about it. She thought that something bad was happening to him and he wanted to protect her from it. The only way Tony could do that was to keep her away from him and it scared her more than anything. However, Michelle also couldn't keep his words blocked away. What if the things he said were true? What if he really needed to be away from her? What if the only thing her visits brought him was pain and misery? What if she never sees him again? Those thoughts made her cry like never before. It felt as though she lost him for good, even more than she already had, and even though she hated to think that his words were true, she liked them better than the alternative. _

_Michelle didn't call or even try to visit him and Tony didn't call her. A month passed since their last phone call; she kept hoping that he would change his mind and call her, tell her that he wanted to see her, but that didn't happen. Jack still visited her every day, they became like brother and sister and his company helped a lot. Jack still had contact with Tony and went to see him every now and then. Michelle kept her façade though, in front of Jack she pretended that she was better than she actually was because she knew Jack tells Tony everything about her. She knew it would calm her husband if he thought she's doing what he told her to do. Somehow she knew that Tony still asked about her even though Jack said he didn't. At least she hoped he did… _

_Each time he visited Tony, Michelle asked Jack how her husband was and Jack told her that he seemed to be more and more in peace. _

_That calmed Michelle down even though it made her sad because it meant that she was wrong and all the bad things she thought and Tony told her were true, but at least he was okay. Michelle kept thinking that something was wrong though because Jack's answers were short. He didn't provide many details about Tony. Jack would only say that he was fine and he seemed to be at peace. She found it strange because before all of this happened he would tell her everything in detail, but she tried to dismiss the concerns as figments of her imagination._

_During that month the idea of going to Seattle sounded better. Since Tony didn't want to see her, Michelle thought that going there might do her some good although she didn't think it would, it might do him some. If Tony heard that she left and kept going like he told her she needed to do, maybe it would make him even more at peace. Even though her heart was breaking, Michelle wanted that more than anything else._

_Also Michelle needed to get out of their house. She still had not changed a single thing. The curtains were still closed, all the things were in the exact same spot they were 4 months ago, and the box with his things was still by the door. Looking at it all was hurting her and Michelle couldn't take it anymore and decided to go to Seattle for her training. The next day she accepted the offer._

_Michelle called Jack and told him that she would be going to Seattle in two days. Jack had news too. He had accepted a position with Secretary of Defense Heller in Washington D.C._

"_I'll miss you, during the past 5 months you became like a brother to me. Your company helped me a lot." Michelle said. "I'm even more scared for Tony now. _

_I don't know how he'll react to all of this, plus he'll remain completely alone."_

"_Tony already knows about D.C. and he's fine with it," Jack replied. _

"_I want to tell Tony that I'm leaving but I don't know how. You know we haven't spoken in a month and I don't even know if he will even talk to me," Michelle said. _

"_I'll call Tony for you and make him talk to you. Also, I want you to know I won't give up trying to find a way to get Tony out of prison. I already spoke to President Palmer about it and things might change soon. I'll probably see him in a month or so in D.C. and we'll talk about it again. I won't make you any promises but I think something will happen then," Jack told her._

"_Thank you for everything you're doing for my husband. I feel so helpless but I don't know what to do or how to help him. There's nothing I can do to get him out of there and even my visits didn't help, and…" she paused to stop herself from crying. "Thank you Jack, if anyone can get him out it's you." _

"_You know he's like a brother to me and he's the only friend I have left. I'd do anything for him. Plus you became my friend over the years and during these last few months you've become like a sister to me. I'd do anything to help you both; just like you both do everything you can to help me."_

"_Thank you again, Jack, you're like a brother to us both; both you and Kim are our family. I'm glad you're going to D.C. even though I'll miss you. I hope you'll be happy there and find some peace too."_

"_Thank you, I hope you'll find some peace in Seattle too. It might do you some good to be away from it all. I'll make sure Tony calls you tomorrow. We'll talk soon; I'll call you from D.C. Have a safe trip."_

"_Thanks Jack, talk to you soon."_

_Jack kept his promise, the next day, while she was packing the phone rang._

_Michelle couldn't open her mouth for a second when she heard Tony's voice. All she managed to say was "Hi." His voice was cold; he said that he couldn't stay for long, that Jack told him she had something important to tell him. Michelle's eyes filled with tears and her voice was trembling while she was telling him about Seattle. When she finished, Michelle said "I don't want to go, I want to see you; I miss you so much."_

"_Michelle… I'm happy for you, you should go. I've been much better during the last month, the distance will do us both even more good" Tony said before finishing with "Good luck" and hanging up._

_Michelle remained shocked even more; she couldn't believe how cold his voice was and even though Tony hid it well, something told her things may not be the way they seem. Even though her instinct might be right there was still nothing she could do about it._

_The next day Michelle flew to Seattle. _

_The two months went by fast as she kept her distance from almost everyone. Michelle was completely detached, cold, and didn't socialize or become friends with any of them. None of her co-workers really knew her, even less than those at Division did. No one knew how much Michelle was actually suffering and how different she was before all of this happened so they gave her a nickname, The Ice Queen._

_Because the work required them spend a lot of time together, Michelle became friends with her mentor Bill Buchanan. Bill was a lonely man, his wife left him because of the job and because of it he had only a few friends. They talked a lot and were able to share their misery, even though she didn't let him in much. _

_Bill was a good man and Michelle was grateful to have him for a friend and to have someone to talk to._

_Tony didn't leave Michelle's mind for a second; she was as miserable as before, even more because of the distance between them. Michelle missed him so much it hurt. She called Jack a lot and asked him about her husband; the only thing Jack would tell her is that he's fine and that still worried her._

_A few days before her training was over Michelle got a phone call she didn't expect. Jack told her President Palmer would pardon Tony. He said it's not for sure yet, but that he firmly believes that Palmer will do it and that Tony will be a free man in two weeks._

_Michelle felt like her heart would jump out even though she didn't know if they would be together and how it would all turn out. She was so happy to know that Tony would soon be a free man like he should be and that is all that mattered._

"_Do you want to be the one to tell Tony?" Jack asked. _

"_Yes, I want to tell him more than anything. _

_I want to hear his voice, I miss him so much. This time apart has only made me realize even more how much I love him, but I don't know if he'll want to talk to me. We haven't talked in two months."_

"_I'll make him talk to you even if he tries to refuse. I'll arrange it all in a week and you'll be able to talk to your husband then," Jack said. "Don't worry, Michelle, everything will be okay."_

"_Thank you Jack, I hope I'll hear from you soon," Michelle replied._

_A week later Michelle was back home in Los Angeles and sitting by the phone feeling as though she was on needles; she couldn't wait to hear his voice. Jack called her the day before and confirmed it. If everything went as planned Tony would get out of prison in a week. When the phone rang Michelle nearly jumped out of her skin. _

_On the other line she heard "Jack?"_

"_No Tony, it's me, Michelle, please don't hang up baby."_

"_What do you want Michelle, I thought you were in Seattle?"_

"_No, I came back a week ago. Tony, I have some good news for you… If everything goes as planned President Palmer will pardon you. You'll be a free man in a week. Honey, you'll be coming home."_

_There was nothing but silence on the line._

"_Tony, did you hear what I said?"_

"_Yeah, I heard, thanks for telling me Michelle, I have to go now. Bye." _

_Before Michelle could respond, he hung up._

Michelle got out of the car, feeling too anxious to sit anymore. The thoughts of their last conversation upset her too much. She started walking around, never even feeling the rain falling on her.

Now when Tony was coming out, Michelle kept hoping that her instinct was right and he was trying to protect her but that what he tried to protect her from wasn't too bad. The last thing Michelle wanted was for her husband to suffer.

She kept hoping she'd have him back, but even more she hoped the last 3 months were at least somewhat peaceful for him. Each time Michelle asked Jack about Tony, his answers were short, and that made her worry. Michelle couldn't make Jack talk and she knew there was a lot he wasn't telling her because Tony asked him not to, and that scared her, a lot.

Michelle's eyes were filled with tears again as she paced around the car thinking about everything. Her mind was racing and all she could think about was how much she didn't want to lose him.

No matter what happened during the last 3 months, no matter what made them separate, she hoped that their love was stronger than anything and that in the end they would be together again.

A few minutes later the rain stopped falling and the gate of the prison opened. Michelle turned around and there he was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author note:** _Thank you for all your reviews._

When Tony walked trough the prison gate, he saw his wife on the other side of the road looking at him. He couldn't believe she was there; Tony thought he was dreaming, and for a few minutes he couldn't move.

What completely scared him was the fact that he knew the last few times he had spoken to his wife he had hurt her badly by pushing her away.

It was not because he didn't love her but because Tony was sure that this moment would never come even when Michelle told him about the pardon. He was sure it would backfire somehow and he would remain in prison. Even though it broke his heart, Tony felt that he had done the right thing, believing Michelle would be better off.

But despite the fact that he had hurt her so badly, Tony could still hear the love in her voice the last time they spoke on the phone, but he was still scared that he hurt her too much and pushed her away.

Tony started walking slowly towards her, scared that the only reason Michelle came to pick him up was because she felt like it was her duty, but in his heart, he knew she didn't. The closer Tony got to his wife; the more he could see the same love in her eyes that had always been there.

The last few feet that separated them seemed like a mile. Michelle couldn't move; she couldn't even feel her legs, she just stood there watching him as he was coming closer and closer towards her.

Michelle looked straight into his eyes just as Tony looked straight into hers.

She knew right then that her instinct was right and that her husband still loves her as much as she loves him.

And there he was, right in front of her. Michelle took a deep breath; her heart was pounding like crazy.

Tony all of a sudden lost his confidence causing him to look down. Ashamed to look into her eyes, he stared at his feet.

Michelle saw it and placed her shaking hands onto his face; lifting it up and making him look at her.

When Tony looked at her, Michelle was smiling. He tried to smile too but was too nervous. Michelle said "Hey" which made Tony smile a bit too. He replied with "Hey" as well and then paused.

His voice was shaking and his eyes were filled with tears when he said "I'm so sorry baby, can you ever forgive me?"

"Forgive you, what's there to forgive?"

"I treated you horribly. I'm so sorry; I can explain everything if you're willing to listen to me… Though I wouldn't be surprised if you don't" he said, tears falling down his cheeks now.

"There's nothing to forgive. I think I have a pretty good idea why you acted like that and I'll listen to you whenever you're ready, but there was nothing to forgive in the first place" Michelle said with her hands still cupping his face, gently caressing it and wiping his tears away.

"But I acted like an ass" Tony insisted. "The things I told you…"

Michelle still had some dark thoughts in her mind, but when she saw the way Tony was looking at her; she knew they'd be okay and remain together no matter what happens.

Michelle covered his lips with her thumbs and said "Shhh, it's over now. I know we have bunch of things to discuss and explain, but we're together again and nothing else matters. I'll let you tell me all about it, but I forgive you no matter why you said those things, as long as you still love me as much as I love you."

On that Tony lifted her up, spinning her around and hugging her as he buried his face in her neck.

"I love you; I love you more than anything. I never stopped loving you; please believe that. I never stopped loving you, not for a second."

While saying it Tony was looking deeply into her eyes, assuring her of it, Michelle just smiled, caressing his face.

"I know. You got me worried for a while, but I always knew that you still loved me. I love you too, more then ever and I never stopped loving you either."

They finally kissed. Their kiss was long, deep and passionate; they transferred all they had just said into it. Tony kissed her neck and buried his face in it again; they held each other as close as they could for a while.

When they separated Tony looked at Michelle, twisted a few of her loose curls with his fingers and said, "Sweetheart, you're soaked, how long have you been standing here?"

"For a while" Michelle replied. "I've been sitting in our car for hours, but I couldn't sit anymore. I was too nervous so I started walking around and I didn't even notice the rain."

"Oh baby, you'll catch cold or something worse" Tony said, looking worried.

"I don't care. I have you in my arms again, nothing else matters" she smiled. "Let's go home."

He smiled too, kissing her again. "Let's go home."

Tony picked his bag up from the ground and tossed it on the back seat of their SUV. Michelle handed him the car keys and said "Take me home." She smiled and added, "But we'll stop at Gianni's first. I left a food order. I'm starving."

"I'm so glad your famous appetite is back", he smiled. "I'm starving too, let's go."

Tony got into the driver's seat as Michelle strapped herself into the front passenger's seat. He caressed her face and kissed her one more time, then they drove off, leaving prison and the worst time of their lives far behind.

Gianni's is a small family dinner, close to their beach house. It's a part of a small string of businesses near the pier Tony and Michelle love walking on. They had gone to Gianni's and walked along that pier on that date so long ago when Tony had first shown her the spot where their house was now standing.

Since then it had become their favorite place to eat, when Tony didn't feel like cooking, that is.

Michelle had not gone in there since the day of the virus; she couldn't. There were far too many good memories which were all too painful while Tony was in prison.

The drive to Gianni's was mostly quiet because they both still couldn't believe they were together again. Even though Tony was driving, every moment he could get his eyes off the road he would look over at Michelle. Michelle kept staring at him, not believing her eyes. She placed her hand on his knee like they always did while the other was driving. That small gesture seemed like the biggest pleasure at the moment. It was something Michelle constantly thought about when she was driving alone during those lonely months. Tony was so happy to feel her hand on his knee; he missed her touch and her closeness so much. He placed his hand on hers and they intertwined their fingers. Both continued to smile to each other, not saying too much, afraid they'd suddenly wake up.

Gianni is a cheerful and charming man in his late 60's who obviously enjoyed his restaurant's cooking a bit too often. He and his wife, Gina, both seemed that way. They're a happily married couple who obviously still love each other very much after 40 years of marriage. Tony and Michelle always looked at them and hoped they'll be as happy 40 years from now. Tony had known them longer as he would come there to eat each time he would go to his spot on the beach. They treated him like a son they never had and he cared about them both. When Gianni and Gina met Michelle they instantly fell in love with her and thought she'd be perfect for Tony; Michelle liked them both a lot. Since then both looked at them as though they were their own children.

Gianni was worried about Michelle when he found out what happened to her and Tony. He and Gina came to visit her daily and brought her food. It was the only cooked meal Michelle would eat during that time, the rest of the food was fast food, pizza, and microwave meals as Tony was the family cook. Even though Michelle would tell them both that it's not necessary to come every day that she was fine, Gina wouldn't leave until she made sure Michelle ate everything. Gina would say to Michelle that she looks too weak and that Tony would expect them to take care of her, plus she would say "You're like a daughter to me, how can I not take care of you?" Michelle was very grateful for their company. Michelle didn't see either of them since she went to Seattle over two months ago.

As they parked in front of the dinner Michelle told Tony that she'd go inside to pick up the food and pay the bill. Tony didn't like the idea of her paying anything which was clear from the look on his face although he didn't say anything. Instead Tony just smiled and told her that he'd wait in the car. Michelle found that to be strange since she knew he would want to say hello to Gianni and Gina.

"Baby, does it bother you that I'm paying for dinner?"

Tony nodded in the affirmative.

"Sweetheart, don't think about it right now. We're together and everything else will work out sooner or later, you'll see." Michelle smiled and caressed his face which made Tony smile as well.

"It's just everything seems so different right now and I guess I have to get used to it all but you're right. I'm so happy to be back with you and I know everything will be okay as long as we're together, I just need some time to adjust to it all."

Michelle could see both happiness and sadness in his eyes.

"I know honey, and I'm here to help you in any way I can. Just don't leave me out of it, let me help you, please" she said, looking straight into his eyes, gently caressing his face in a expression of love and comfort; trying to show him that she wants to be there for him more than anything else.

Tony knew that she does.

"I will but I'll stay here anyway. Maybe in a few days I can say hi to them, perhaps even tomorrow. Right now it is all overwhelming and I'd just like to go home."

Michelle gave him a light kiss on the cheek. "Okay baby, we'll go home in a second. I'll just go get the food since there isn't a single thing in the house and we both need to eat."

"I didn't think there would be any food in the house," Tony said with a grin.

Slapping his hand lightly, Michelle said, "That reminds me, we'll have to go to the store in the morning" and winked.

They both laughed at that and she gave him another kiss before exiting the vehicle to get their food.

Tony remained in the car looking after his wife as she went inside. He still couldn't believe he got her back. Michelle was his life and he loved her more than anything. He knew how much it hurt her when he pushed her away and didn't want to see that happening again. It was obvious how much Michelle wants to help him and Tony needed her around more than anything. He wanted to keep her informed of what's going on in his mind but he believed that he could handle it on his own without letting his wife in on it all and did not want her to endure his anguish.

Tony promised himself one thing; even though there were a lot of issues on his mind, he'd rather suffer on his own and find a way out of it without Michelle knowing then to let her suffer any more than she already did. In the end Tony decided to let Michelle in on just few things and see how it goes from there. One thing he wanted to assure her of is that he loves her more than anything else and that he doesn't want to lose her.

When Michelle entered the dinner Gianni was at the counter and when he saw her, he rushed to Michelle and hugged her.

"I'm so happy to finally see you, my dear. Gina and I were so worried. Let me look at you."

Gianni took a step back and measured her head to toe "You look skinny; we'll have to fix that" he smiled, giving her another hug. "So, where is he? I was so glad when I heard that he's been released. I'm so happy for you both."

Michelle replied with a huge smile. "I still can't believe it either. He's in the car waiting for me. It's all a bit too much for him, but he promised to come to see you both in a few days, maybe even tomorrow." Her smile wasn't there for a second, "I hope he'll be okay, Gianni. I'm so worried about him even though he seems alright, there's a deep sadness in his eyes. I can't tell you how much it worries me. I hope he'll be okay" but then she smiled again, "I'm sure he will be though, we're together again, and that's all that matters. We'll find a way out of it."

Gianni tapped her shoulder and said "I'm sure he'll be ok dear, you two can handle anything. It's so good to see you smiling again, I missed your smile."

He handed her a pack of food and said with a grin, "Don't keep him waiting any longer, it's on the house."

Michelle wanted to say something but as she opened her mouth, the bell above the door began to ring.

Turning around, Michelle was surprised to see Tony standing on the door. He was smiling when he said, "I heard you have soaked hot wives to go."

Michelle smiled; when Gianni saw him he hurried to him and gave him a big hug.

"I'm so happy to see you, my son. I'm glad they finally released you, morons."

"Yeah, they got tired of me so they let me go," Tony said and smiled again. "How are you, how's Gina, where is she?"

"We're ok, same as usual. Gina went to visit her sister for two weeks. She'll be sad she didn't see you, she missed you both and was so worried about the two of you; we both were."

Tony went over to his wife, hugged her around her the waist, and kissed her forehead; Michelle wrapped her arms around his neck and looked into his eyes.

"You guys don't have to worry about us anymore; we're together again. It might take some time but as long as we have each other everything will be okay again." Tony said kissing Michelle and rubbing his nose against hers.

"First thing I want to make sure of is that my beautiful wife starts eating and sleeping more," he said, kissing her again.

"I want to thank both you and Gina for everything you did for my wife. Michelle told me you visited her every day and brought her food. I was much calmer knowing that you two were there for her, but I'm here now."

Tony smiled to Gianni and kept holding Michelle who just looked at him with a huge smile; her arms wrapped tightly around his neck. Tony was back and no matter how long it might take; she was certain that everything would be okay sooner than either of them imagined. Michelle was so happy that she kept expecting to wake up.

Gianni came and hugged them since he was a big man; he managed to hug them both.

"I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that. You two are like the kids I never had and I wish you the best. You both deserve it."

Tony and Michelle thanked him for his kind words and for everything. They promised to come again soon, wished him good night, and left.

When they reached the car, Michelle placed the food on the back seat of the car. When she turned around Tony hugged her, picked her up and spun her around again.

Tony passionately kissed his wife. "I love you baby, so much. I'm so happy to be with you again" he said before kissing again. "I know we need to discuss a lot of things. It will take me time to adjust to everything and I doubt it will be easy at first. I want to apologize in advance for the way I might behave," he paused and they both smiled "…but I want you to know how much I love you and how happy I am that you want me back. I am so glad I didn't screw that up with my behavior towards you but I want you to know I did it only to protect you. I'll explain everything to you. It might take me a while to tell you everything that's going on in my mind though. You'll have to be patient with me, but I will tell you. I love you more than anything" he said before kissing Michelle one more time.

"I love you too, more than anything. As long as we're together, no matter how long it takes, we'll be okay and we'll find a way out of it all. Take your time for everything, I'm not going anywhere. It will take me a while to tell you what's on my mind too, but we'll do it slowly. We have all the time in the world."

Michelle smiled and added, "I don't want you to apologize for anything anymore, or feel bad about what happened. I know you only did it to protect me. Why do you think there's a double food pack in there of our favorite meal, ordered before we talked outside the prison?" She asked, kissing the top of his nose.

"No matter how worried about everything I was at times, deep in my heart, I knew everything would be okay. We said for better and for worse and I know we can handle both as long as we love each other like we do. I love you my wonderful husband and I'm so happy to have you back in my arms."

They shared another kiss.

Tony and Michelle hugged for what seemed like forever, totally forgetting they were on a parking lot. Eventually the rain that started to fall and Michelle shivering reminded them of it.

"Let's get you home. You need a warm bath and a warm meal. I don't want you catching cold or something worse" Tony said; taking his jacket off and putting it around his wife before opening the car door for her.

"I'll be okay; I have you with me again. You'll take care of me like you always do" Michelle smiled and sat in the car.

"You know I will" Tony said kissing her again. He went around the car, got into the driver's seat, and they headed for home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews_

Tony and Michelle arrived to their home 5 minutes later.

They were both happy to be coming home together and had constant smiles on their faces.

Tony got out of the car, walked to the other side and gave Michelle his hand. She took it and he pulled her close, hugging her, and kissing the top of her head. Michelle returned the kiss with a light one to his lips. They grabbed his bag and the food from the back seat and walked hugged toward their home.

When they opened the door, Tony placed his bag on the floor and with even bigger smile on his face, picked up surprised Michelle and carried her over the threshold just like he had done the first time they entered their home so long ago. Tony put her down and said, "For the new beginning." Michelle caressed his face and kissed him.

Tony took his bag and placed it by the door next to the CTU box with his things while Michelle went to put their food on the kitchen counter. Listening to his footsteps walking throughout their home was a great joy to Michelle. She looked over her shoulder and watched him walking around, adjusting to being home again. Tony suddenly had a sad look on his face. Michelle walked over to him from behind and placed her arms around his waist, kissing the crook of his neck she asked, "Baby, what's wrong? You look sad all of a sudden."

Tony turned around in her arms and looked into her eyes, caressing her face. Michelle could see that his eyes were filled with tears.

"It's just… you didn't move a single thing, not even that TV-guide, nothing. The box with my things is still by the door; curtains are closed and they never used to be closed. Sweetheart, I keep looking at our home and I see how much you must've suffered while I was in the prison, far more than you were showing me after that first visit. Even though I always knew you weren't better, I now see how bad you really were and it's killing me to imagine it. I can't tell you how much it hurts me when you suffer and you must've suffered horribly."

Michelle could see how much it was all hurting him and she berated herself for not straightening the house before going to pick him up. She had every intention to do it before he came home, but she was too worried about the whole pardon situation and how would it all turn out so with everything else that was going on in her mind, she forgot.

Michelle couldn't hide it anymore. She wanted to hide it from him forever knowing it would hurt him but since that wasn't an option anymore she just told him everything.

"I did; I suffered so badly. I could hardly eat or sleep without you. I kept having nightmares about that day, about the hotel and you going to jail and you weren't here to comfort me. It made me feel horrible because it made me realize that my nightmares weren't just nightmares but my reality. I felt so alone, so trapped, and I couldn't find a way out of it."

Tony kept looking into her eyes and he could tell how much she suffered just by looking into them. There was only happiness before, and now there was sadness too, just like there was in his eyes. He held her tightly.

"Everywhere I turned were beautiful memories we created together. Keeping things the way you left them made me more comfortable because it reminded me of our wonderful time together. Even though it was hurting me at the same time, I couldn't force myself to change any of it." Michelle kept caressing his face while she looked straight into his eyes.

"Losing it all made me feel so bad, so incredibly alone; our house was so empty without you. I missed your smile, your touch, your voice; your calming words whenever I needed them, your warm body next to mine during the night… Every little thing I grew accustomed to and took for granted because I never thought we'd be apart for the rest of our lives and when I lost you..." Michelle buried her face in his chest, tears filling her eyes.

Talking about it brought on memories she wanted to forget the minute Tony took her in his arms.

"I love you more than anything and I missed you so much. I felt as though I'd go crazy without you. I can't believe you're home again. I keep expecting to wake up and it all to be a dream." Michelle hugged him as tightly as she could with her face still buried in his chest.

Tony caressed her back, calming her down, like he always did.

"Shhh, I'm here now sweetheart. I'm not going anywhere. I can't believe I'm home with you either; I keep expecting to wake up too. I love you so much.

This time we'll be together forever, I promise."

Michelle looked up; her eyes were filled with tears, "You promise? I couldn't bear losing you all over again. I just couldn't."

"And where would I be going? I couldn't bear being apart from you again. This is where I belong; right here with you and this is where I'm staying, okay?" Tony looked into her eyes, assuring her of his words.

"Okay," Michelle replied; smiling to him, his words and his closeness calmed her down.

They kissed and stayed hugged for a while.

"Baby, you should go take that shower now; you're shivering again. I don't want you to catch cold. I'll just put this food into the microwave and see what things CTU sent. When you get out, I can take a shower" he said, kissing her again.

"Sure," Michelle said kissing him back, "I am cold. I'll go take that shower." She turned and went to the bathroom, wondering why he didn't go take the shower with her like they always did.

When Michelle went to take her shower, Tony placed the food into the microwave and opened the curtains. He couldn't bear to see them closed because they never were and the house looked so sad like this. Tony kept imagining how much his wife must've suffered while he was gone both about him and that hotel. He promised himself one more time she'd never suffer again.

He picked the box up from the floor and placed it on the coffee table. Tony opened it up to see all his old things in there. His face was a mixture of sadness and anger when he saw it all. Tony only took his mug and the picture of him and Michelle that had always been on his office desk. The rest he left in the box and placed it all at the bottom of their closet, pushing it deep inside so he wouldn't have to look at it.

He placed his mug on the kitchen counter and the picture of the two of them on the fireplace with others. When he saw all of their pictures, Tony smiled. Every one of them was an incredible memory and he swore to himself that they'll have more of them. He had so many things to work out till he could smile like he was in these pictures without something bothering him.

Tony knew both his and Michelle's nightmares were far from over, but he was sure that one day they will be and they'll smile that way again, as long as they're together.

Even though he knew it would be impossible to avoid it for much longer, Tony had a reason why he didn't join Michelle in the shower. He didn't want to upset her and his reason likely would.

Michelle came out of the shower, covered herself with the bathrobe, and went to tell her husband it's his turn.

When Tony saw her, he hugged her and said, "I promise we'll take that shower together soon. I just wanted to get two things I missed the most out of the box, even though that's not much of an excuse. To be honest, I just wanted to get that box out of the way so I don't have to look at it. I have to ditch that bag too," he smiled weakly. Michelle caressed his face and kissed his cheek showing him she's there for him.

"But I'll make it up to you, I promise," he kissed her neck, and caressed her, sending goose bumps down her back.

"I'll take you up on that," she replied and looked at him seductively.

They kissed passionately.

Tony went into the bathroom, leaving Michelle alone. She wasn't sure about the decision she made ten minutes later, but she did it anyway.

Michelle decided to go after him anyway knowing Tony won't object. She thought he was still upset and worried about the things that happened between them during the last three months and that he wanted to take things slowly especially because they hadn't really discussed it. However, she missed his closeness so much and knew he missed her too.

Michelle wanted to show him that he doesn't have to worry anymore about what happened between them. She needed to assure him of how much she wanted to be there for him and how much she wanted him close to her. She knew he needed her to get out of the past eight months and she needed him to help her find peace with the events of that horrible day that still haunted her.

Michelle waited to hear the shower running for a bit before she went into the bathroom. She came inside, took off her bathrobe, opened the slide door of the shower, and walked inside quietly closing the door behind her. Tony was turned with his back to her and was just finishing rinsing his hair, so he didn't hear her coming. She placed her arms around him and kissed his back. That surprised him and he turned around to face her. At that moment Michelle saw the reason why Tony didn't come into the shower with her, he had a scar on his chest. It wasn't large and it looked as though it healed but it was still visible. Michelle placed her hand over it. "Baby, what is this? Is this the reason why you didn't want me to come in here with you?"

"Yeah, I didn't want to upset you, especially because I didn't tell you about it when it happened. I wanted to protect you back then and I didn't know how to show it to you now. Even though I knew I wouldn't be able to hide it forever, I wanted you to stay calm for at least few more hours, especially after what happened before. I'm so sorry for not telling you back then or now," he said, looking at her apologetically.

Michelle ran her hand over the scar and looked at him. She was shocked, but at that point she wanted to hold him more than anything else.

"I know baby, it's okay. You'll tell me all about it when we get out of here, don't think you'll escape me." She smiled, placed both her hands around his waist and kissed his chest. "But right now all I want to do is to hold you in my arms. I missed you and I missed feeling your skin against mine. Just hold me close, let's forget about everything else at least for now."

Tony smiled too and hugged her tightly, "I missed you so much; I still can't believe I'm holding you in my arms again. I love you baby. I promise to tell you everything later, but right now I want to hold you in my arms and feel your body against mine more than anything."

They held each other like that for a while, letting the water fall on them; it felt like a dream to be together like this again.

After some time Tony started caressing her back, kissing her neck and lips.

He gently stroked her hair with his other hand, playing with her wet curls. Michelle had her hand on his strong chest, running it up and down his muscles. She had her other arm around his neck, kissing it and his lips, caressing back of his head and going down to his strong back.

They were both enjoying being back in each other's arms after all this time apart.

Michelle took a washcloth and gently washed his strong body with it. Tony closed his eyes, enjoying it; she then slowly washed the soap off of him.

When she was done, Michelle kissed Tony's chest a few times and leaned her head on it. Closing her eyes she hugged him tightly.

Tony placed his arms around her, kissed the top of her head and slowly caressed her back.

A few minutes later Michelle was shivering again, even though it was warm in the shower. Tony lifted her head to see her eyes filled with tears again.

"What's wrong honey, is it this scar of mine?"

"Yeah, I've been trying not to think about it but it just hit me that I came so close to losing you and…" she hugged him tightly and leaned her head back on his chest, kissing it. She started shivering again, tears now falling onto his chest. Michelle didn't want to cry but she couldn't stop herself.

Tony caressed her back, calming her down, "It's okay baby; I'm here.

Let's get out of here and I'll tell you all about it, okay?"

Michelle calmed down a bit, smiled and nodded.

Tony opened the slide door and got out with Michelle.

He took a towel and wrapped it around his waist. Tony wrapped another one around Michelle and sat her down on a bathroom stool. Kneeling in front of Michelle he took her hands, kissed them, and asked, "Do you remember the guard who was watching me and making sure nothing happens to me?"

Michelle nodded and said, "Yeah, of course I do, Jack's friend, Mike."

"Exactly, he was a good man, and he took care of me, kept me away from other prisoners. There was bunch of them who hated me. Some were in prison thanks to me. Others, many guilty of crimes far worse than mine, resented me for being a traitor and some of the guards resented me for it as well. All of them would've been more than happy to see me dead," Tony said.

Michelle's eyes were filled with tears; the thought of what might've happened upset her. "But if he took care of you, how did this happen?" She looked at his scar and touched it, shivering again.

Tony looked at her, kissing her hands again, calming her down.

"Mike got sick and took some time off to get better. Things changed in the prison administration just before he got sick. Jack wasn't allowed to help me in any kind of way because he didn't have connections anymore and the new administration didn't like my special treatment so they took it all away, aside from a separated cell. Mike liked me and wanted to keep an eye on me none the less and they let him do it. But when he got sick I had this guy who hated my guts and said he's not a babysitter, so he just let me be with everyone else even though they hated me. One day, things got out of hand and this inmate came at me with a knife, stabbing me. He didn't manage to stab me too hard, because I kicked his ass." He smiled; Michelle did too, though she didn't find any of this funny.

"After I came out of the infirmary I was separated from everyone else for most of the time again. But I couldn't tell you yet because the guard didn't really care what happens to me, so I didn't want to scare you even more. I know I hurt you so badly by pushing you away from me, but at the time it seemed like a better option. They weren't going to let me have the private room for our visits anymore and I didn't want you around those criminals. I couldn't risk them hurting you just to hurt me."

Tony looked deeply into her eyes.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart; I know I shouldn't have acted the way I did, but I only wanted to protect you. When I heard about Seattle, I thought that was the best way to keep you safe, as far away from me as possible. So I decided to keep it up, and make you think I don't want to see you, even though that was so far from the truth. I kept my façade going just to protect you; I even got Jack involved, thinking I was doing the right thing. Even though I thought my heart would break, I thought it would be a better option for you, to move on and live your life and be away from me and that hell."

He cupped her face.

"Baby, I love you so much, please believe me. I did all of this to protect you and keep you away from it all. I know you're a strong woman and you don't need my protection, but I couldn't help acting the way I did. If I couldn't keep myself away from it all, at least I could make damn sure you were safe, and that's the only thing that matters to me.

Please, believe that I love you more than anything. You are my life; you're the only thing that matters to me and I only wanted to protect you." Tony looked at Michelle smiling; looking deep into her eyes he caressed her face, assuring her of his words.

"Oh baby, I know that. I love you so much; you are my life and the only thing that matters to me too. I believe you and I understand why you did it. I always knew you were protecting me from something. Jack's short answers gave him away. I always knew something was wrong, I just couldn't figure out what it was. The way he behaved, even though the poor thing was trying, I knew something wasn't right.

No matter how much your words hurt me, I knew somehow you were saying them to protect me. There were times when I was happier with them being true than you suffering. I knew you were suffering both ways but I thought if they are true you'll suffer less in time and if not you'll suffer even more. Even though I'm glad I was right and they were not true, it hurts me so much to see how much you suffered. I hate when you suffer as much as you hate when I do." She caressed his face.

"It saddens me so much to see what happened to you. This scar is just half of it. I wasn't able to take care of you when you got shot, because they took you away from me, and now this too…"

Her eyes started filling with tears. "I love you so much and they took you away from me. I could've lost you forever and I can't live without you, I…" Michelle bit her lower lip to stop herself from crying again. As bad as she wanted to continue, Michelle knew if she did, then she would start crying for sure.

"Shhh, I know honey, I know. Come here."

Tony got up and lifted Michelle to her feet. He sat down on the stool and sat her in his lap, leaning Michelle's head on his shoulder, caressing her back. Michelle hugged him tightly.

"I can't live without you either. I just wanted to protect you from all that prison hell and the only way I could've done that was to keep you away from it. And even though I probably never would've seen you again, it would've been better than something bad happening to you.

The only thing that matters to me is that you're alive and well, even if it means far away from me."

Michelle looked at him clearly worried.

"But that's not an option anymore, we're together now, and nothing will separate us," he said, kissing her forehead, causing both to smile for a second.

Tony continued, "I don't know what I would've done if something happened to you and I lost you. When I remember the day I came so close to…" Tony paused and kissed her neck. Just thinking about it all upset him as well.

"But we're together now, I still can't believe it. I'll make damn sure nothing comes between us again" he said, kissing her neck again and burying his face in it.

They stopped talking and hugged as tightly as they could. The feeling of closeness soon calmed them down.

After a while Tony said, "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere, you'll have hard time ditching me, I'm stuck with you."

Michelle looked at him happily, both were now completely calm and smiling to each other, all the sadness was gone, for now.

"Good, 'cause I'm kind of stuck with you too, forever, and I'm not letting go of you that easily ever again" she said with an even bigger smile, kissing his neck.

Tony kissed her and said, "There's that smile again; I missed it so much." Michelle replied, "I missed yours too, we'll be smiling all the time again in no time, you'll see."

"I know we will; all the nightmares will go away as long as we're together."

They kissed and remained that way for some time.

"So, Jack didn't fool you, huh? I'll never understand how that man is so successful in undercover operations" Tony said shaking his head.

With that they both started laughing like crazy.

"But, I do want to tell you one thing, even though I now see you knew it all a long. I made him act like that and we both pretended it to be true to protect you. But I want you to know that even though I told him to tell you I didn't ask about you, I did. Every time Jack and I spoke or saw each other. I missed you so much it hurt and I wanted full reports. Jack told me you were calmer, that you still asked about me all the time and didn't look completely well, but that you seemed better and I kept thinking I was doing the right thing."

"I guess I fooled him much better than he fooled me. I felt like my heart would break. I wasn't better at all, but I made him think that. Just like I knew you were protecting me, I knew you were asking about me and I wanted Jack to think I was better so he can tell you that. I wanted you to be calm in both cases and especially in case your words were true. I didn't want you to suffer either or to know how horrible I felt thanks to all my nightmares and everything else…" Michelle looked into his eyes and smiled, showing him that she's calm and that he doesn't have to worry about her. Tony replied by gently caressing her face.

"But, let's not talk about it anymore, at least for now. Let's just enjoy being together for some time without bad thoughts although I want to ask you one thing first."

"Ask me anything" Tony said.

"When I told you about Seattle, you made this pause and it made me realize even more that things weren't the way they seemed. Why did you pause? Did you want to tell me something or I was imagining things?"

Tony looked into her eyes and saw how well she knows him, even better then he knows himself.

"No honey, you weren't imaging things. I did want to tell you something.

Mike came back and everything was somewhat better, for a while anyway. When you told me you didn't want to go, I wanted to tell you to stay, to come to me.

I wanted to tell you how much I missed you and how much I wanted to see you and hold you in my arms." Now his eyes were filled with tears. Michelle gently caressed his face, calming him down.

"But I didn't, I couldn't. I had no idea if Mike would leave again and then you'd be in danger and I couldn't push you away twice. The one time nearly broke my heart" he said while Michelle continued to caress his face.

"Even though he was back, private room for our visits were not available for me anymore. I didn't want you around those morons. I didn't want them to hurt you; I couldn't risk it. And they were capable of anything, believe me. I'm glad I got out when I did since I managed to avoid fighting with them for most part, for both of our sake.

So, you going to Seattle seemed like a perfect way to keep you safe and away from it all. When I hung up, I felt like someone ripped my heart out, but I kept thinking I was doing the right thing. You didn't sound better, but I thought in the long run it would be a better option. You have no idea how much I wanted you with me while Mike was around, but I thought I was just being selfish because I missed you too damn much so I didn't do it. I now see I was wrong and we both suffered for no reason. Maybe nothing bad would've happened and we would've had each other during all this time.

Oh sweetheart, you have no idea how much I needed you, probably as much as you needed me, and we were apart thanks to me."

Tears started falling down his cheeks and Michelle wiped them away.

"No baby, you didn't do the wrong thing; you did what you thought was right. You tried to protect me at all cost because you love me more than your life, just like I love you more than mine. That's why we both suffered, because the other's wellbeing was more important to us than anything else." She smiled and caressed his face, kissing him. "I love you so much."

Tony pulled her into him, hugging her even tighter. "I love you too honey, so much. I know you don't want me to apologize to you anymore, but I have to.

I feel so bad about the way I acted with you during our last conversation.

I just hung up and you sounded so happy for the pardon and to have me back.

All I could think about were all the ways how it could all go wrong and how I'd remain locked in that hellhole away from you." He leaned his head on her shoulder, his eyes were filled with tears; Michelle caressed his back, calming him down, allowing him to let it all out.

"I was so alone and so miserable in there. I couldn't imagine it all to be over so soon. I kept thinking that something would happen and it would all go to hell one way or the other and I'd remain incarcerated and you'd be disappointed. I called Jack the minute I hung up with you and yelled at him for raising your hope. I wanted to kick his ass for letting you believe I'd come out before it was for sure, but Jack told me it was and he told me I'd be out in a week. I thought I was dreaming and then I remembered how I treated you. I was sure I'd lose you somehow because I couldn't imagine any of it coming out right. I just couldn't imagine that I'd have you back so soon. It felt like a dream and I didn't think it would come true till I saw you in front of the prison. My beautiful wife waiting for me, still loving me and wanting me back, us going home and holding each other… I still think I'll wake up all alone in that cold cell." He buried his face completely into her hair and cried.

Michelle kept calming him down by caressing his hair.

"Shhh… It's my turn now to tell you that I'm not going anywhere. I love you with all my heart and soul. No matter what happened between us, it's over, we will remain together. It was a horrible time and we handled it the best way we could, the way we thought was right. It's now over, we passed over it and we'll be together forever. There are more things that will haunt us, but we'll go over them too, you'll see sweetheart, you and me. We can do it, you know, and we will, as long as we love each other the way we do, and that will never change no matter what future brings us." She said; kissing the top of his head and caressing his back and his neck, they held each other as tightly as they could.

Tony looked at her and said, "I love you baby and I know you're right. It will all be okay; it's enough for me to look into your eyes to know it."

They kissed and held each other for some time, calming each other again with their closeness.

"You said you want us to forget bad things for a while and to enjoy being together again. So I tell you what, why don't I dry your hair, like I always did and then we can go eat our dinner. I'm starving" Tony said.

"Okay," Michelle said with a huge smile. She loved when Tony was drying her hair. He started it long time ago and she missed it all this time.

They stood up, hugging and kissing each other. Michelle then sat back on the stool and Tony took the blow drier from the cabinet. He then gently dried her hair. Sitting in front of the dressing table mirror, they kept looking at each other and smiling. Tony would pause now and then to kiss her hair and neck.

When Michelle's hair was done, Tony kissed the top of her head; she got up and hugged him, kissing his chest again.

They got into their bathrobes and went to the kitchen to eat their meal. It was supposed to be a lunch but it turned into a dinner.

Michelle sat on a bar stool while Tony took care of the food. She couldn't believe that he's back in their kitchen. For a moment, it seemed to Michelle like the last 8 months had never occurred, like he was there all the time and she was so happy to see him there again.

Tony turned around and saw her smiling; he smiled too, leaned over the counter, and kissed her. He set the microwave to heat up the food again before moving around the counter and placing his arms around Michelle, hugging her tightly.

Michelle spun around in the stool so she was facing him and looked up at him. They smiled to each other.

"I love you my husband; I missed you so much, I'm so happy to have you back."

Tony kissed her.

"I love you too my wife; I missed you too and I'm so happy to be home with you."

They kissed and she leaned her head on his chest. Tony and Michelle stayed like that till the microwave bell interrupted them.

Michelle moved to the table while Tony went to get their food. He came back with two plates of their favorite meal, lasagna. They ate it on their first visit to Gianni's restaurant and it became their favorite meal. Although they loved his cooking and all of the other things he made, lasagna was their favorite.

As soon as he sat down with the food, they quickly started to eat as both of them were starving. Tony was glad to see Michelle eating happily again. Michelle felt her appetite finally coming back; she kept looking at her husband and even though she knew it was all far from over, at this moment, she was the happiest person in the world, and so was Tony. Both kept smiling all the time.

"You know, I still like how you make it better", Michelle said.

"I know baby, and I'll make them for you soon", Tony replied. "Maybe I can work as a cook for Gianni. Even though I wouldn't mind working for him for a while, I wouldn't want it to be my permanent career. But I'm sure no one else will take me," he said with a sad look on his face.

Michelle got up, went behind him, and placed her arms around Tony. She leaned her head on his shoulder and kissed his cheek.

"Oh honey, I'm sure you'll be able to find something that will suit you and everything will be good in time. For now don't think about it. We have enough money to live normally. All of our savings are in place for any future investments. I'm working… I know it's not same, but for now we'll be fine. We might even do something together again, who knows?" Michelle said kissing his neck.

"I know; I feel angry and sad about it right now, but we'll figure something out" Tony said with a smile. "Don't worry about me, I'll be okay."

Michelle could see that he wasn't okay about it and that it would bother him for a long time. However, she could tell that he didn't want to talk about it right now and spoil this moment. She wanted him to be as happy as he could be and Michelle knew they'd talk more later. It was just a feeling she had that Tony wouldn't want to talk about it when the time comes, but she knew he'd have to sooner or later, but it wasn't necessary right away. Michelle wanted them both to relax and enjoy being together for a few days without worrying about anything so rather than saying something; she simply smiled and caressed his face.

Tony knew he wasn't fooling her, but he also didn't want to worry Michelle at this point with the dark and painful thoughts that were going through his mind. He didn't want her to have to share in his suffering; convinced he could handle most of it on his own. Even though Tony knew it wouldn't be easy to hide it from her, or at least all of it, he was determined to try and hide as much as possible and if not, at least postpone it for a while.

"Baby, how about we move to the couch and watch some TV before we go to bed? You probably have to get up early tomorrow morning."

"No, I don't" Michelle said with a smile. "Bill, my mentor from Seattle, came to work at Division. He's my boss now. I told him you're coming home and that I need a week off to be with you, and he allowed it."

Tony smiled, got up, hugged her, lifted her up, and spun her around.

"That's great honey. I'm so happy we'll have some time just for ourselves. We deserved it after everything. We'll just enjoy each other's company for the next seven days without thinking about anything else. I just want to enjoy having my beautiful wife back" he said, kissing her neck, rocking her side to side.

"I want to enjoy having my husband back too and nothing could keep me away from that. Fortunately no one tried, or they would've seen hell."

They both laughed at that.

"When the time comes for me to go back to work, we'll start worrying and discussing things again. There's a whole bunch of things we need to sort out, but they can wait a week." Michelle smiled and kissed him.

"Yeah, they sure can." Tony said and hugged her even tighter. "But right now, I just want to be with you and the rest of the world and all the problems don't exist, nothing does, but you and me." He kissed her.

"No, baby, nothing does." Michelle kissed him back.

"So, what do you want to do now?"

Without a word Tony picked her up in his arms and carried her over to one of the kitchen cabinets, opened it and took a bag of their favorite snack, peanut M&M's.

"Now, how did I know that even if there's no food in the house, there will always be these?" He grinned; Michelle slapped him lightly on the arm and started laughing.

"You know me; I can live without food, but not without M&M's," she said, kissed the top of his nose and leaned her head on his shoulder.

Tony carried her to the couch. They snuggled up closely and decided to watch TV for a while, like they always used to do before going to bed.

Tony looked at Michelle and smiled, kissing the top of her head. "You have no idea how much I missed this. It's so simple and it might even sound stupid, but I missed this little routine of ours. Just eating our snacks and watching TV in peace, talking about whatever we were watching, doing noting special and still having the best time. I'm so happy we can do it again and to have you back in my arms."

"I'm so happy too; I missed it more than I can say, I hardly even watched TV while you were gone, I missed talking to you about whatever I was watching. I also could never get comfortable in this couch without you; I always missed you and your arms around me. I'm so happy to have you back" Michelle said kissing him.

Even though they wanted to watch TV; Tony and Michelle ended up kissing, cuddling and caressing most of the time. They were both too happy to be together to pay attention to anything else.

Half an hour later they decided to go to bed. It was a long and tiring day and they were both exhausted.

But the sleeping part of the plan changed soon.

When they came to the bedroom, Michelle took off her robe and remained standing, totally naked. Tony came behind her and kissed her neck. Caressing her breasts and stomach he wrapped his arms around her. "I missed you so much," he whispered.

Michelle turned around and took his robe off, slowly caressing his back. She wrapped her arms around his waist and kissed his chest. "I missed you too, more than I think I could ever truly express in words."

Tony caressed her back, kissing her neck and shoulders. "I can't believe I get to touch you and kiss you so soon. I thought I'd never do it again."

"Shh, no bad memories remember, only happy ones" she said, kissing him.

Tony smiled, "you're right honey, only happy ones," kissing her back.

He lifted her into his arms before gently lowering her onto the bed. Tony began to gently kiss her from her lips down, stopping on her breasts, stomach and inner thighs for a long time. Michelle closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of having her husband's loving kisses back on her body.

When Tony had kissed her entire body, he came back up the same way.

As he laid himself on top of her and looked into her eyes, he said "you're so beautiful; I love you more than anything. I'm so happy to be back with you."

Michelle smiled and gently caressed his face, looking into his eyes which were, like hers, filled with love and desire. They kissed passionately for some time.

"I'm so happy to have you back. I love you honey, so much." Michelle said.

It was now Michelle's turn to kiss her husband. Turning Tony onto his back, she did it the same way he did, from his lips down and then back up again, pausing just like Tony did on certain areas.

When she had finished placing kisses all over Tony's body, Michelle stretched her body over his and looked into her husband's eyes.

Tony wrapped her in his arms and for what seemed like the longest time, they simply looked into each other's eyes. Kissing slowly and gently every now and then, they enjoyed the feeling of being together again, after what seemed like an eternity to both.

Tony then gently turned her on her back and kissed her passionately, "I love you so much."

"I love you too baby, so much" Michelle said, and guided him into her.

They made love slowly, constantly telling each other how much they love one another and how much they missed being together, kissing each other all the time, never breaking the eye contact.

When they were completely satisfied, Tony placed his head on Michelle's stomach; Michelle gently caressed his hair. They lay like that for some time without saying anything, being happy to be together again.

Some time later Tony came up and spooned Michelle into him, covering them both with a quilt.

"I love you my beautiful wife. Good night" Tony said, kissing her neck.

"I love you too my husband. Good night" Michelle replied looking into his eyes and kissed him.

Tony and Michelle soon fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms, feeling whole again for the first time in almost 8 months.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews_

…_The cell door closed and Tony dropped himself on the bed, his body was filled with bruises because the inmates decided today it would be fun to kick him around. He managed to kick most of them back, but couldn't fight alone against ten men for long, so he ended up bruised before any of the guards came to his aid. Fortunately Tony was in a separated cell although some of the guards would often threaten to give him a cellmate. Thankfully he knew they wouldn't so soon after the stabbing. So at least for now he didn't have to worry what a cellmate might do to him while he slept. Harry, the new guard that replaced Mike, came to bug him again. He hated taking care of Tony, because just like most of the inmates and guards, Harry considered Tony to be a traitor. His favorite game was hurling every insult that his tiny brain could come up with. Tonight he was telling Tony how he'd let him back in the general population during recreation time again, because the inmates loved their new punching bag. He would regularly bang his baton on the bars of the cell so as not to let Tony get any sleep._

_Tony tried to ignore him as he always did and looked at the picture of him and Michelle from one of their beach picnics. It was the only picture of them he had. He kept looking at her smile and remembering their time together. Michelle was the only thing that kept Tony going, even though he was sure he'd never see her again. No matter how bad his time in this hell hole was, he didn't regret what he did; not for one second. He missed her more than anything, the bed in his cell was cold; he kept imagining her warm body next to him and her arms around him, caressing him, telling him how much she loved him. He felt like he was suffocating between the four tiny walls of his cell, but even though he hated being locked in, he was afraid of the morning and the time he'd had to come out..._

Tony kept his eyes closed and didn't want to open them because he was sure he could feel Michelle's body leaned against his. He was sure he could feel and hear her breathing and kept thinking it was something he didn't want to lose by waking up. But a few seconds later he remembered what happened and realized that it was not a dream; his wife was in his arms and he was home again. So he opened his eyes and saw Michelle sleeping in his arms. She was sleeping on her stomach with her head resting on his chest, her hair partially covering her face. Tony smiled when he saw her; he couldn't believe she was there. He gently and carefully so as not to wake her up, lifted her hair off her face. Michelle just scratched her nose and placed her hand back on his chest without waking up. Tony smiled at that and kissed the top of her head, hugging her a bit tighter.

Continuing to look at his wife, Tony still couldn't believe his eyes. He didn't move a single muscle, even though he was stiff from lying in the same position, because he didn't want to wake her up. Tony knew Michelle didn't get enough sleep during the last 8 months, so he wanted her to rest as much as possible.

Knowing how much it relaxed her, Tony gently caressed Michelle's back and kissed the top of her head every now and then. He knew she probably had her fair share of nightmares that would haunt her sooner or later but since that didn't seem to be happening right now; Tony wanted her to sleep peacefully for as long as possible.

Tony looked at her for over half an hour. Finally Michelle started to stir and he knew she'd wake up soon. Suddenly she stopped breathing for a second and yelled, "Tony, no!" Michelle shivered but didn't open her eyes.

Tony caressed her face, "Shhh, I'm here honey; it's only a bad dream. I'm here; everything is okay."

His voice calmed her down and she laid there for few more minutes, holding him tightly, before opening her eyes.

When she finally did, Michelle smiled when she saw him.

"Hey, so I didn't dream about yesterday. It really is you. You're home with me, and this was just a bad dream."

"I told you it was, didn't I?" Tony asked.

"Yeah baby, you did" Michelle replied and kissed his chest.

Tony propped himself up and leaned himself in half sitting position against the headboard. Michelle leaned her head on his chest, placing her one hand on his chest and other under him, hugging him.

Tony hugged her tightly and kissed the top of her head.

"Pinch me anyway; I want to make sure this isn't a dream" she said looking into his eyes.

Tony caressed her face.

"I'll do something much better to make you see you're not dreaming" he said and kissed her passionately.

They kissed for a long time, caressing and cuddling without saying too much, enjoying their first morning together.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Tony asked.

"Do? I don't want to move from here. I just want you to hold me like this forever" Michelle smiled and kissed his chest.

Tony kissed the top of her head.

"Well, you wouldn't hear any arguments from me, but my stomach is kind of complaining and I think I heard yours joining in."

Michelle kissed him again.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. We better feed them or we'll have mutiny on our hands."

They both laughed on that.

"I tell you what, why don't we first take a nice long shower together and then I'll see if I can make us something for breakfast? We can then go out and buy some groceries and spend the day together outside. When we come home, we'll get back in here and stay like this the whole night."

"Sounds like a plan," Michelle replied before they kissed again.

Few minutes later they got up, hugged, and went into the bathroom. The next 45 minutes Tony and Michelle spent enjoying being together again. They ran their hands and planted kisses all over each other's bodies. If their stomachs didn't complain again, they probably wouldn't have stopped there.

When they got out of the shower, Tony kissed each drop of water from Michelle's body and caressed her. She just closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of his lips and hands back on her body.

After a while, while Tony was kissing her neck, Michelle whispered into his ear, "If you keep this up, we won't get out of here till dinner. Not that I mind, but you said yesterday that you want to make sure I start eating more again and this won't get us there…" she giggled.

Tony looked into her eyes and smiled. "What can I do, when you're so beautiful? I missed you so much" he said kissing her.

Michelle caressed his back. "I missed you too baby, and when we come back home tonight, I'll show you just how much," she nuzzled his ear and gently kissed his neck a few times.

"I can't wait. Come on darling, let's get you dried off" Tony said, kissing her again.

When they were both dry, Tony and Michelle came out of the bathroom.

Tony went to find something for them to eat.

While he was doing that, Michelle realized that the curtains were opened and the whole house was filled with daylight like it used to be. Even though Tony opened them the night before, she didn't realize it till now. Michelle walked over to the glass doors and looked outside on their back porch, the beach and the sea.

Tony saw that his wife appeared to be lost in her thoughts. He walked over to her from behind; placing his arms around her waist he kissed her cheek and rested his head on her shoulder. "Hey baby, you okay? You look like you're miles away."

Looking over to her husband, Michelle caressed his face and placed her hands onto his. "Yeah, I was just thinking how much I missed this view. We had so many great moments outside; starting with the first night we spent here even before the house was built. I couldn't open these curtains because it hurt me too much to remember it all and to enjoy the sunshine and this view without you." She turned around and placed her arms around his neck. "I'm so happy to have you back and to enjoy it all with you again. I missed it so much."

"I missed it too sweetheart. I'm so happy to be with you again. I thought it would never happen. I'll spend the rest of my life being grateful it did and so fast. I love you baby," Tony said.

"I love you too, honey," Michelle replied kissing him.

"I missed this view as much as you did, as well as our times enjoying it. I have an idea. How about after we eat we go for a walk on the beach? We can't spend long time sitting on the porch or on our beach below enjoying the view since it's cold and cloudy, but we can take a walk. I missed our walks too."

"Sounds like a wonderful plan," Michelle said. "I also missed our walks, and as soon as the weather improves we'll spend more time on our porch and the beach below."

"You bet." Tony replied kissing her. "Come on, let's eat. We only have cereals, toast and butter, but that should be enough for now. We can eat something else outside."

They ate happily and flirted all the time, both were delighted to have their life back and to be free of all the worries, even if it was for only few days.

After getting dressed, Tony and Michelle went outside trough the back porch and down to their part of the beach that was right below their house. Michelle turned to Tony and hugged him.

"I'm so happy to be out here with you again. After what we've been through it seems like a century passed since the last time we've been here together. I keep remembering how wonderful our first night here was all those years ago. And even though it was only fifteen days after we started dating, I knew I'd spend the rest of my life with you. I love you so much. You have no idea how much I missed saying that to you."

"I missed saying it too. I love you baby, so much. I knew I'd spend the rest of my life with you too, right then. On our first date we said we wouldn't rush anything, that we'll take things slowly and see where it led us, and we rushed into everything. We were engaged only two months after our first date and married four months after the engagement. It didn't feel like we rushed it at all; it felt like the right decision and it was. The best one we made and nothing will separate us again, no matter what."

Michelle caressed his face and kissed him. "No baby, nothing will separate us, no matter what happens in the future. We belong together and we'll stay together."

Tony kissed her back and lifted her in his arms, spinning her around.

"Let's go for our walk, too bad the weather isn't too nice," Tony said.

"It doesn't matter, as long as we're together," Michelle replied.

"You're right honey," Tony said and taking her hand in his and kissing it. "That's all that matters."

They walked slowly, hand in hand, talking and flirting, enjoying every minute of being together again. The weather improved and the sun came out so it was warmer for a while.

After some time, Tony asked "want to head back? We should get our car so we don't have to carry the groceries back home."

"Okay. You're right, there's no point of carrying all of that," Michelle replied.

When they reached their part of the beach, Michelle smiled and sat down on the sand. She extended her hands towards Tony and when he took them, she pulled him down.

"Shopping can wait. I just want to sit with you here and enjoy having you back" she said, climbing into his lap and hugging him tightly.

"You read my mind. I wanted to do this before, but I didn't want you to catch something since there was no sun, so it's much nicer now," Tony replied pulling her into him, leaning his back on the rock behind them.

They remained hugged like that, without saying anything, just kissing on occasion till the sun went behind the clouds again and it got too cold for them to stay for any longer.

"I guess it's time to go shopping and eat; I'm getting cold and hungry," Michelle said.

"I'm getting cold too," Tony replied. "I'm so glad your appetite is back. I know I said it before but I was so worried about you and I'm glad you're getting back to your old self," he said kissing the top of her head.

"No wonder my appetite came back when my reason to smile and live is back," Michelle said kissing him soundly. "Come on baby, let's go."

She got up and took his hands, pulling him up. They hugged again and walked towards their home.

When they got into their SUV, Tony asked, "So, how do you want to spend the rest of the day? Where do you want to go?"

Michelle kissed him, "It's your first free day and I want you to decide where we'll go."

"As long as I'm with you, I don't care, but since you want me to decide, I guess we can go to our usual shopping area, eat lunch first and then go to the mall and buy everything in one place. We can walk around shops for a while and go to Gianni's for dinner before going home. How does that sound?"

"Perfect, just like you are," she said.

"You're the perfect one, and I'm so lucky to have you." Tony said, kissing her passionately.

"I think it would be the best to agree that we're both perfect and lucky to have each other or we'll be here for a while," Michelle giggled.

"Deal," Tony chuckled and caressed her face. "I love you, my perfect wife."

"I love you too, my perfect husband."

They kissed one more time and drove off.

Fifteen minutes later they arrived to the shopping area close to their home.

They loved this part of the city because it had all kinds of small shops that they could spend hours in.

After they found an empty parking space, Tony and Michelle went to a small restaurant they liked going to during their shopping time.

They flirted constantly while they ate, having a great time. Once they finished their lunch, they prepared to head for the mall. Tony made a face when Michelle paid for their meal, but he didn't say anything.

The mall was the only large building in this area and it was fairly empty today, which suited them just fine because they both hated crowds.

Tony and Michelle took a shopping cart and went into the supermarket. They both drove it, Michelle in front and Tony behind her placing his arms around her and his head on her shoulder. It was impossible to push it like that for long but it made them laugh and was a lot of fun to try.

Once the cart was full with everything on the list, they went towards the cash register.

Michelle was worried how Tony would react when she paid for all of it. Even though the debit card Michelle was using was from the account they opened together and kept both their funds on it, but since he didn't contribute anymore, she knew that it would bother him a lot.

She turned around and looked into his eyes. "Honey, I have to pay now. I know you don't want to spoil our time together, but I can't help worrying about you.

I know how much this bothers you and I don't want you to eat yourself over it."

"Sweetheart, I can't lie to you. It bothers me and it bothers me a lot. Even though we have always used this card, my money isn't on it anymore. It bugs me to no end that you're the only one providing for us and paying all our expenses. I want you to have everything, I don't want you to ever lack for anything and right now, I can't pay for an apple and I hate it. It makes me feel awful," he said, his eyes filled with both sadness and frustration.

Michelle kissed his cheek. "Oh honey, you shouldn't feel that way. Everything will work out, you'll see. You just have to be patient. I know you want me to have everything, but I don't need anything but you. Besides, I don't mind providing for us till you find something to do, maybe something we can do together. You just take your time and don't think about it. Take it slowly till you find yourself again. We're fine; we don't need anything more than this. Just try not to worry about it too much," she said, kissing him again.

"You're right baby. I don't want to worry about it, but I can't help it. I'll tell you one thing; I'll put it aside for now. We're together again, you have a free week for us to spend together and that should be the only thing on our minds right now. To use this time the best way possible and we'll worry later. I'll be okay baby, don't worry about me," he said and smiled a bit.

"Okay honey, we'll put it away for now. How 'bout we go back and buy everything we might need for the whole week so we don't have to come here for some time? I don't want to waste our time together buying food."

"Good idea," Tony smiled and kissed the top of her nose. They turned back and went to get the rest of the stuff they might need, forgetting about the subject for a while. When they came back to the cash register the line was long.

Michelle turned around and placed her arms around Tony's neck.

"We'll be together after I start working, you know? I know it won't be 24/7, but it's only a few hours a day. I hate that job and I want to leave it one day, but it's better if I stayed, at least for now. If I leave it, I want it to be for something we'll do together because that's the only way I enjoy working, side by side with you, and I'm sure that will happen one day," she said, kissing him.

"It's my dream for us to work together again; it's the only way I enjoy working too. I'm sure we will though it seems far away right now. I know it's only a few hours a day we'll be apart but I'll still miss you. I'll count the minutes till you come home" Tony replied and kissed her back.

"It will pass faster than you think," Michelle said hugging him.

When the line cleared Michelle said, "Let's pay and get out of here, okay?"

"Okay," Tony smiled.

When they got out of the supermarket, Tony and Michelle took the shopping bags into their SUV and headed home since either of them felt like browsing.

After putting everything away at the house, they headed for the restaurant.

When they arrived in front of Gianni's it was too early for them to eat so Tony suggested they go for a walk along the pier first.

They walked all the way to the bottom of the pier and Michelle sat on a bench. Tony sat down beside his wife and wrapped his arms around her tightly to keep her warm.

"This isn't such a good idea, baby. This wind is too strong and cold for us to sit in one place. You'll catch cold, we both will," Tony said.

"You worry too much," Michelle replied.

"We won't stay for too long. I just missed coming here with you. It's beautiful during the day and when it's evening like this. I love seeing all these lights and the ocean, and I can see our home from here. I just want to stay for a bit," she said before kissing him.

"I'd like to stay longer too, but I can't help worrying about you and taking care of you," he smiled, kissing her back. "I love this place, even before we started dating I loved coming here. But after I started coming here with you, I love it even more."

Tony and Michelle remained sitting there for twenty minutes and walked back to Gianni's.

Gianni was delighted to see them and glad they both looked so happy.

They spent long time in there, talking to him, remembering the past and eating their dinner.

It was quite late when they got out of Gianni's so they headed home. When they got to the house, they finished putting away the remainder of the things they had purchased that afternoon.

After they finished, Tony noticed Michelle yawning.

"Sweetheart, are you tired? Do you want to go to bed?" he asked.

"My body does, but sleeping is the last thing on my mind," Michelle smiled looking at him seductively. "I made you a promise earlier and I intend to keep it," she said while taking his shirt off.

Michelle kissed Tony's chest and neck a few times, caressing his back, and then lead him to the bedroom.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews._

The next week went by faster than Tony and Michelle wanted it too but they spent every moment of it together.

They decided to spend most of the time alone with one another and not really go anywhere special. The only thing Tony and Michelle did everyday was to go on their walk. Other than that, they only went out if necessary for groceries or to Gianni's when they didn't feel like cooking. Everywhere they did go, it was together and the rest of the time they spent inside at home, in each other's arms and loving every minute of it.

Despite how happy he was, Tony's problems continued to bother him although he didn't say anything to Michelle, not wanting to spoil their time together.

What Tony hated the most was that he couldn't provide for his wife anymore.

He knew Michelle didn't want him to worry about it as they had enough money to live well until he finds something on his own and also enough money saved for something they might decide to do together in the future.

Also, she was working… she was working, that part bugged him the most. The job she still had was something Tony hated. He didn't resent her for keeping it; he was scared for her. Tony wanted to find a quick solution to get her as far away from Division as possible before something happens to her. However, he knew there aren't any quick solutions and that troubled him a lot. Tony had other things that distressed him, but he made sure Michelle knew nothing about how he felt. He wanted her to be calm and happy during this time.

Even though Tony thought Michelle didn't realize how he felt, she did, at least about most of it anyway.

Michelle knew that Tony was dealing with his own demons, because she knew her husband well, even when he was trying to hide it. She wanted to talk about it and clear it all up so they can continue their life in peace without all of this hanging over their heads but she saw how much he wanted to avoid talking about it.

And even though she hated to think what must be going trough his mind right now, she had decided, just like him, not to say anything. Michelle knew the time would come when they'll have to deal with it, but this wasn't the time.

Nightmares still haunted them, but what both Tony and Michelle wanted more than anything else was for the other to be happy during this week. The past seven days were too much like a dream come true and both made sure nothing spoiled their happiness about being together and being in each other's arms again. Their love was stronger than anything and so was the concern for the other's wellbeing. Even though they knew it was inevitable, they decided not to drag the demons out just yet.

The last day of Michelle's vacation came fast. It was a rainy morning, and one of the strong claps of thunder woke her up. She looked at Tony and was surprised that he was still fast asleep, since they were both light sleepers.

What Michelle didn't know was that Tony spent most of the night awake, holding her and staring at her, worried about what will happen when she goes back to work. His biggest fear was loosing her again one way or the other. Millions of scenarios went through his head, none of which were good. What he feared the most about that job was that something might happen to Michelle and he won't be there to help her. And that job wasn't the only way he imagined that he would lose her. All of that didn't allow him to get a lot of sleep.

Michelle kept looking at him; he was sleeping on top of her with his head on her stomach, his arms wrapped around her waist. Gently running her fingers through his hair, she smiled, still in disbelief that he's there. Even though Tony didn't know it, Michelle was worried about losing him as well. They didn't clear everything up and so many things were going through her mind. Even though, like Tony, she believed that everything would work out in the end, Michelle was scared that this dream might somehow end.

Michelle continued to look at her husband sleeping and gently caressed his hair and bare back for a long time before another strong clap of thunder woke him up.

Tony looked up at her and smiled, "Good morning sweetheart. Are you okay? How come you're not still sleeping?"

"The thunder woke me up. I was surprised it didn't wake you too." Michelle said as she caressed his face.

"Well, I'm not surprised; nothing can wake me up when I'm sleeping in your arms. I'm too comfortable," he smiled and kissed her bare stomach. "Are you hungry? I can make us something to eat."

"No, I'm not," she said. "I just want to hold you like this for a while."

"You won't hear any objections from me," Tony said, kissing her stomach again. "We can eat something later and hold each other like this all day. Seems like we won't be going out today and I want to hold you in my arms as much as possible. Though that doesn't depend on weather conditions or anything else, I always want to hold you."

He lifted himself up and kissed her passionately.

"I want to hold you too, always," she said, kissing him back. "We'll spend the whole day like this; I'm not letting you go."

They remained like that for some time; Michelle placed another pillow under her head so she could see him better. Tony returned to his old position and placed his head on her stomach wrapping his arms tightly around her. Michelle kept caressing his hair and back, and Tony kissed her stomach every now and then. They didn't say anything; they just enjoyed feeling close to each other.

After a while Tony said, "I think it's time for me to make us something to eat. What do you think?"

"I agree, although you have to promise me that you'll hold me for the rest of the day or I'm not letting you go," Michelle said with a smile.

"Now that's a promise I can keep for sure," Tony replied before pulling himself up to her face, kissing her passionately.

Michelle hugged him tightly and they kissed for a while.

Some time later, Tony rubbed his nose against hers.

"I love you baby, and I'm not letting you go this whole day, but I have to feed you first since I promised to make sure you'd eat more."

"I love you too honey. I'm glad it's pouring and we can't go out, even though we held each other most of the time during these past seven days, it's never enough for me and I'll enjoy holding you this whole day."

"It's never enough for me either and I won't let you go," Tony replied. "Let's go eat."

They got up, got into their robes and walked together to the kitchen.

Tony decided to make waffles with maple syrup, scrambled eggs, and banana smoothies.

He went to the fridge and got the necessary ingredients out. Tony then moved to the counter and started preparing their meal. Michelle came from behind and placed her arms around his waist, leaning her head on his back.

"Hey you," Tony said without turning. "Missed me already?"

"You bet," Michelle replied kissing the crook of his neck. "I told you I won't let you go all day. So you'll be stuck with me till you finish cooking."

"Good," he smiled turning slightly and kissing her cheek.

"Need any help?" Michelle asked.

"Unless you don't like this kitchen and you want it to burn, no," Tony said with a grin.

Michelle slapped his back lightly and hugged him, "fine, then you'll be stuck with me like this till you finish. Do you need me to bring anything? Did you forget something?"

"No, I've got everything I need right here," he said, caressing her arms.

Michelle leaned her head on his back and hugged him even tighter. "So do I."

When their meal was done, Tony turned around, looked into her eyes and smiled, "ready to eat?"

"Yeah," Michelle replied kissing him.

Placing the food on the table, Tony and Michelle sat down to eat.

They kept flirting, kissing and feeding each other, enjoying their time together.

When their breakfast was done, they cleaned everything up together and placed the dishes into the dishwasher.

"This meal was perfect, just like you are," Michelle said, placing her arms around his neck, kissing him passionately.

"Thank you my love, I'm glad you enjoyed it. It has to be perfect when I'm making it for the most perfect woman in the world," Tony replied kissing her back.

"Want to watch the TV for a while?" Tony asked, caressing her face.

"Sure," Michelle smiled.

They walked over to the couch and snuggled up closely in each other's arms. Michelle leaned her head on Tony's shoulder and he wrapped his arms tightly around her.

They tried watching the news but didn't feel like viewing anything serious, so they flipped through the channels till they stopped on some silly sitcom they couldn't even try to laugh to. But that was perfect at the moment since they couldn't concentrate on anything but each other and the TV part was soon forgotten again.

Michelle placed her hand inside Tony's robe and caressed his bare chest while he kissed the top of her head every now and then and played with her hair.

Tony lifted her head with his fingers and looked into her eyes, "I love you so much," he said.

"I love you too, honey, so much," Michelle smiled.

Tony caressed her face and kissed her. Their kiss prolonged and became more passionate. He separated her lips with his tongue, gently pushing it into her mouth which she gladly accepted and they gently played with their tongues.

Michelle climbed into his lap as they continued to kiss each other passionately; she gently went through his hair with her fingers and caressed his face while he held her tightly.

After a while Tony moved from her lips; removing her robe a bit, he kissed her neck and bare shoulders.

Michelle ran her hands down his neck and placed them inside his robe, slowly taking it off; she started gently caressing his bare back.

Tony allowed her robe to fall free and he slowly caressed her bare back too, all the while never stopping the kissing of her neck and shoulders.

When Tony leaned his head on her shoulder and gently started caressing her all over her body, Michelle kissed his neck a few times and whispered "I want you" into his ear.

He looked at her; both of their eyes were burning with desire. Tony got up with Michelle still in his lap; her legs were tightly wrapped around his waist and her arms around his neck.

He carried her to their bed, while they kissed each other passionately.

Tony sat Michelle down on the edge of their bed, kissed the top of her head and kneeled in front of her.

He smiled; caressing her face he tucked a curl behind her ear, "You're so beautiful; I love you so much."

Tony wrapped his arms around her; placing both his hands on the small of her back, he started kissing her breasts, stomach and inner thighs.

Michelle closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of his lips on her skin, "I love you too, so much," she went with her fingers up and down his back.

Twenty minutes later, Tony came up to her lips and they kissed passionately. Their lips didn't separate until they both ran out of air.

He got up and they hugged each other tightly.

Michelle looked at him lovingly and started getting up, stopping to kiss his stomach and chest for some time on her way.

Her hands were gently going down his back to his waist, resting there and gently caressed it. She then stopped on his neck and kissed it a few times, "I want to sit in your lap", she seductively whispered into his ear, nuzzling it, while taking off his boxers.

Two hours later they were lying in each other's arms completely satisfied.

Michelle was lying on top of him, with her head on his chest, kissing it every now and then. Tony wrapped his arms tightly around her.

After a while he gently started caressing her back and kneading her backside which made Michelle giggle, "if you keep this up, we'll never get out of here."

"Who says I ever want to get out of here?" Tony asked, smiling and kissing the top of her nose.

"I can live with that, all I'll ever need is right here," Michelle said, returning the kiss.

"I'll never need anything else either," Tony replied, hugging her even tighter.

Tony gently rolled them onto their side without breaking the embrace.

They looked into each other's eyes for a long time, without saying a word, kissing and touching each other slowly and gently.

Michelle placed her leg over both of his and pulled herself into him as closely as she could hugging him tightly, kissing his neck and gently running her fingers down his back to his backside. She looked into his eyes seductively showing him how much she wanted him again, without saying a word.

Tony didn't need any words, he wanted her as much; he gently eased himself into her.

They made love slowly, kissing and caressing each other constantly, without breaking the hug or the eye contact.

Some time later, Tony and Michelle were completely satisfied again. They remained in the same position as they made love in; lying on their side looking deeply into each other's eyes.

"I love you baby, so much," Michelle said, going with her fingers through his hair, planting gentle kisses all over his face, "you have no idea how much I missed you and how happy I've been these past seven days. I still can't believe I got you back. I feel like I'm dreaming and I'm scared what will happen when I wake up." Her expression changed as her eyes filled with tears. Michelle bit her lower lip as she caressed his face.

"I love you too sweetheart, so very much," Tony replied, looking into her eyes.

"I've been as happy these past seven days, it felt like a dream come true, it still does. Don't be scared about what will happen, you're awake and I'm here, where I will always be. I know we have some hard times coming our way, but whatever comes, we'll remain together. From any future nightmare we'll wake up together; you'll see," he said, kissing the top of her head.

"I know we will honey, I know we will," Michelle said kissing his chest, pulling herself closely into him.

Tony wrapped his arms even tighter around her and they remained like that without saying anything else, kissing every now and then.

An hour later the weather improved. The rain stopped and the sun came out a bit.

"What do you think; maybe we should go take a walk? Stretch our legs a bit? I like walking on the beach after the rain, and I know how much you like it too," Tony asked.

"We can walk all the way to Gianni's and back. I think Gina is coming back from her sister's today; we should go talk to her and thank her for everything she did for you while I was away.

We can grab something to eat over there. I would say lunch, but it will be closer to dinner," he grinned.

"Well, what can we do, when we can't have enough of each other?" Michelle replied with a smile. "You're too handsome for me to ever let you go or have enough of you."

"Well, when you put it like that… We can always stay in here and go to Gianni's for breakfast tomorrow morning because I can never have enough of you either. I'm sure they'll understand especially since they know how much I love my beautiful wife and how happy I am to have her back in my arms," Tony said, kissing her forehead.

"I'm sure they will because they both know how miserable I was without you, my beloved husband, and how happy I am to be back in your arms," she said before giving him a light kiss.

"But maybe we should go take a walk anyway, we've been in this bed for hours, we could use it, and say hi to them at the same time.

Eating there might be good too so we don't waste time on cooking, because I have plans when we come home. I want to take a nice, long bubble bath with you before bed," Michelle said caressing his back.

"That sounds great, let's go then," Tony replied but he didn't break their hug, instead he started kissing her, gently planting kisses all over her face. He stopped on her lips, kissing them slowly and passionately, gently tugging her lower lip.

Michelle hugged him even tighter kissing him back.

"I love you, my wife," Tony said after they stopped kissing twenty minutes later.

"I love you too, my husband," Michelle replied.

"We should really go now."

"Yeah, if you insist," Tony said, pretending to pout.

Michelle smiled at that and kissed the top of his nose. "Don't worry; we'll be back in here soon."

They got up and got dressed; twenty minutes later they were out on the beach.

The sun shyly came out behind some clouds, it was late afternoon and the beach was empty. The rain stopped only an hour before so no one else had gone out for a walk yet.

Tony and Michelle were all alone as they walked slowly, holding each other's hand, kissing and flirting, enjoying their walk.

"I love the smell of the sea and air after the rain. I'm glad we decided to build our house so close to the beach so we can enjoy it any time we want.

It's enough to get out on our back porch to enjoy this wonderful view and these scents," Tony said.

"Yeah, I love it too; it's so wonderful. I'm happy you showed me that little spot where our house is now, we were so lucky no one bought it before us. We couldn't find a better place to live. And it's all thanks to you," Michelle said, kissing him. "I missed our walks so much while you were away. I'm so happy we're walking together again. I know we walked everyday since you came back but I want you to promise me we'll keep doing it even when I go back to work. No matter how late it is, I want to walk with you a bit."

Tony kissed her, "I promise my love; I love our walks. I remember how we used to go for a walk every night after a hard day at CTU and it would always relax us both. We'll keep walking everyday, no matter what. And when the weather becomes warmer again, we'll sit and sleep on our porch and our beach too," Tony smiled. "I just hope I'll find a job soon. I don't know who'll take me, but I still hope I'll manage to do it," he said with a gloomy look on his face.

"You will my love, you'll see. You'll find something to do faster than you think," Michelle said kissing his hand.

"Baby…" Tony started and paused.

"What is it, honey?" Michelle asked.

"Never mind, it doesn't matter, it's not the right time," Tony replied.

"It matters, you wanted to tell me something and by the look on your face it must be important, so what is it?"

"Michelle, I really want you to leave the Division. I want our future life to be away from all of that," Tony said looking at her. "I want us to have a fresh start. I know it's a big step, but we can handle it."

Michelle just looked at him.

"I want to find a job and move away from the past, but I want you to leave that hell hole too. I want us to decide what we can do together, after we solve our problems, because I want to work with you again somehow. It doesn't matter whether it's our own business, though I'd prefer it or some job where we can work together. However, I want it to be away from CTU, District, Division or any place connected to that world. Although…" he paused for a moment. "If it wasn't for that job, I never would have had you and that's the best thing to come out of it," he said, caressing her face, "but it also nearly took you away from me and I don't want to risk that again. You can stay there till we decide what we can do but I don't want you in danger anymore. You don't have to decide now and even if you decide you want to stay, I won't be angry, I promise, though I would really like you to do this."

"We used to work at CTU 24/7, and it was amazing, we worked side by side and with you there time seemed to fly. I had so much fun working with you but after that day everything changed and so did my perspective of work and that place.

After what happened to you, it all completely lost its charm and my love for it is gone. I can't deny part of me still loves that job, like I know part of you does too, but bigger part of me hates it because it took you away from me and you're the only thing that matters to me. I don't want that anymore either; I want to work with you again more than anything, that hasn't changed and it never will. I don't want to take any more chances; I don't want to risk our future together. I can't wait to leave Division and do something simple with you, something that will give us plenty of time to enjoy one another," Michelle said, smiling to him.

Tony smiled; he picked her up, spinning her around. Placing her down, he kissed her passionately before saying, "I want to try to find a job first though. I need to work for a while before we start planning our future together because I want to fell useful again. I hate that you're paying for everything and I hate feeling like this."

"Okay, I know how much it bothers you and I know working will make you feel better. However, whatever you find, you make it temporary, only until we decide what we can do together unless it's something you fall in love with, but then I'm coming there because I want us to work together again.

And maybe something on our own would be even better than working for someone else, a private little business, nothing too big, something that will let us live our life together with work. Take all the time you need to find a job, I'm not going anywhere, but after you do I want us to start planning what we might do together. We have enough money saved to invest in our future business and I want that more than anything, and I know you want it too," Michelle smiled.

"I want it, more than anything, just like you. I want to work with you again and our own business sounds like a dream, but I'm not as optimistic about all of it as you are. You have more confidence in me than I do. I don't know who will take me. They'll just dismiss me the minute they see my resume and I don't know if I'll be good for our future business either. Who will want to work with me? I'm just a traitor in all of their eyes and maybe in yours too," Tony said, with totally depressed look on his face.

Michelle stopped in front of him and placed her both hands around his neck. "It will be their loss then. I don't want you to ever call yourself a traitor again or think I see you as one, because neither is true. You're the most amazing, gentle, kind man in the world. You work well and hard, and you're dedicated to your work. That day didn't destroy any of that; it just showed how amazing you are exactly. You didn't do what you did because you wanted to betray your country; you did it because you love me more than anything, just like I love you. You didn't think of the consequences for yourself, all you wanted to do was to save me. I'll never see you as a traitor and I never did. It will never change the way I see you, my love," she said before giving Tony a gentle kiss.

"You're a wonderful man who acts with his heart and I will always respect you for that and I'm sure whoever we work with in the future will too. We'll be okay and so will whatever we decide to do. You just have to believe in yourself as much as I do and everything will be fine," she said gently caressing his face.

"I love you so much; losing you was never an option. I didn't care what would happen to me because without you I could die anyway," Tony replied, kissing her, burying his face in her neck.

Michelle hugged him tightly, leaning her head on his shoulder. She didn't want to say anything because she didn't want to start crying when all the memories of that day came back to her mind. Michelle knew there would be plenty of time to go into that day but this wasn't it. Both she and her husband were too happy to go into it now, so she just smiled and kissed his cheek.

"I'm sure it will happen just like you said. I feel miserable right now and I need time to get back to the man I used to be. You are and you'll always be my inspiration to move forward and with you by my side, I'll do it," Tony said.

"I love you too honey, so much, and you'll always have me by your side, no matter what," Michelle replied, hugging him even tighter.

Tony kissed the top of her head. "It's a deal then, as soon as we take care of our problems, we'll either find a job at some company together or start our own business, which I like even better."

Michelle looked into his eyes and smiled, "Deal."

They kissed and remained hugging for a while.

"Let's go, we need to get to Gianni's and you better eat fast, because I want to go back home" Michelle said with a wink.

Tony kissed her passionately, "I can't wait, let's go."


	6. Chapter 6

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews._

They arrived at Gianni's fifteen minutes later with the huge smiles on their faces. The diner was empty, only Gianni and Gina were there. When they saw them at the door, both hurried to great them.

"Hey you two, let me look at you," Gina said. "It's been so long when I last saw you both; I didn't think I'll recognize you. There are those smiles back again finally, you both look great. When Gianni told me that both of you looked so happy, I was sure he was saying it so I wouldn't worry, even though I knew you'd both be much happier the minute you got back together again."

She hugged them both, "you two have no idea how glad I am to see you together again, and this happy."

Gina turned to Tony, "I was so scared for you, my son. When I imagined you in that stupid place where you didn't belong with all those criminals, my heart was breaking. I'm sorry Gianni and I didn't visit you but only talked to you on the phone when they would let you. I couldn't force myself to look at you in there. You don't belong with them, you're an angel," she said kissing his cheek. "Though you're a tough kid, you always were, from the day I met you almost 20 years ago, and I knew you'll be okay. I was so happy when Gianni told me you came out of that hell hole."

She then turned to Michelle and placed her hand on her cheek. "And you; look at you. You almost look like your old self again. You thought you were fooling me, but you weren't.

I know you well enough to notice how badly you were suffering, even though you were trying to hide it from everyone. I know why, you were scared we'd tell him and that he'd suffer because of it even more. Just like I knew why he pushed you away and you knew it too, even though he didn't tell it to either of us, to protect you. When you told Gianni and he told me, I just said, so what else is new?"

She tapped both of their shoulders, "I know you both too well."

Smiling to them, Gina continued. Looking at Michelle her expression changed, "that's why I was so scared for you, you know. You hardly ate, you were just a shadow from the girl I know, who's tiny as a bird and can eat like someone ten times bigger and that deep sadness in your eyes and that weakness, you looked like you didn't sleep during all that time. The old Michelle I knew and loved was completely gone and it scared me so much. I don't know what would've happened to you if he remained in prison any longer and away from you. You looked so bad and now you're smiling again. You have no idea how much I missed your beautiful smile. I'm so happy to see it again, my dear."

"You need each other to be complete, just like this old hot air balloon and I need each other," Gina said tapping Gianni on his stomach. All four laughed on that.

"I know it's still far from over, but you two will be okay no matter what, just as long as you have the other by your side. No matter how bad things might seem or even get, you'll find your way back to each other; I just know it. You both should believe it and everything will be fine," she smiled to them both. "Your love can survive anything."

Tony held Michelle tightly around her waist; he didn't let her go for a second.

All the things Gina said reminded him of how much he loved his wife and how much she had suffered during the past 8 months. He hated to imagine it and he knew her nightmares weren't over just like his weren't. They both had a lot of ground to cover before they can finally be in peace.

"Thank you Gina, thank you for your kind words and for everything you did for Michelle while I was gone. You have no idea how glad I was to know you and Gianni were there for her. I told him that already but both Michelle and I wanted to come here today and thank you in person for everything. We're both so lucky to have you guys; you're like a family to us and we don't know what we would've done without either of you. I know we'll see a lot of each other in the future, but we wanted you to know anyway. Thank you both so much, for everything," Tony said and smiled.

Michelle only had one thing she wanted to say. "Tony said perfectly how we both feel and I don't have anything else to add, except to thank you both for everything one more time. You guys truly are a family to us and we love you both."

Gina smiled, both she and Gianni were touched by what Tony and Michelle said and they hugged them both.

"I think it's time for us to eat, don't you think so kids?" Gianni asked. "Gina and I were just about to eat our dinner too. There's no one here today because of the stupid weather, but it might be even better because this way four of us can eat together in peace."

"Sounds excellent Gianni," Michelle said. "We're sorry we came by so late, but we had some work around the house," she smiled to Tony, and he smiled back, "and the weather was too horrible to go out sooner."

"That's okay my dear, it's perfect this way. Now we can eat together and no one will bug us. Come to help me get the food out, Tony. Gina and I made enough pizza to feed the whole army. It should be enough for four of us."

Tony and Gianni went into the kitchen; Michelle and Gina remained behind.

"How are you, my dear? How have you and Tony been during the past week?" Gina asked.

"Really happy, it's like a dream come true, Gina. I didn't think I'd have him with me for a long time, maybe forever, and he's here and I'm so happy. I'm just scared it will all disappear. I'm scared I'll lose him and that we'll end up apart. But somehow I know we'll be okay… no, I'm sure of it" Michelle replied with a small smile, assuring herself of her own words.

"I don't want to think about it right now, I'm too happy."

"You're right, there's no reason to think about bad things now, boys will be back with the food soon." Gina said, tapping her on the back. "But mark my words, you two will be fine, no matter what, you'll have each other forever."

"I really hope so Gina; he's my whole life and I couldn't live without him. I keep worrying because there is so much we haven't discussed. But my instinct was right before and I'm sure it's right this time too. We'll find a way to make it all work out, sooner or later, no matter how hard it will be," Michelle said.

"Your instinct is right," Gina tapped her shoulder. "Trust me."

Michelle just smiled.

Tony and Gianni were getting the pizzas out; Tony looked at Michelle for a second and smiled.

"She's really special, isn't she?" He said. "She's my whole life. I still can't believe how lucky I am to have her or that I got her back so soon. I just want her to have everything and I don't know if I'll be able to give it to her. You have no idea how much it frustrates me to be without a job, Gianni. I have no idea if I'll be able to find something or what will happen. She wants us to work together again, and that's what I want too, but I don't know how it will ever happen. She believes in me and she's sure I'll do it and I'm so scared I'll disappoint her. I don't want to think about this now, but I can't help it," Tony said with a sad look on his face.

"Listen, you can always come to work with me, till you two start working together on your own. I think it's the best idea for you to open your own business, just like you both want. I know you're not a cook and I know it's not a future for you. But I also know how these schmucks think and if you don't find anything else come to me, only for a while, till you figure it all out," Gianni said.

"Thanks Gianni, I might even take you up on that. I'll try to find something more suitable, even though I know I'll never find a better boss. Don't be offended, you know how much I care about you, but I want to see if I can work in a more familiar environment first," Tony replied.

"Why would I be offended? You should work something that suits you more. You're a good cook; I taught you well when you were younger and you still have it in you. If you don't find something else, I want you to know there's always a place for you here." Gianni smiled. "Now come on, our girls are waiting for us."

They brought out the food and all four ate happily and talked for a long time.

Tony and Michelle still had to walk home so they thanked them for everything one more time and bid them goodnight.

After they got out of Gianni's Tony took Michelle's hand and held it tightly.

He was completely lost in his thoughts and so was she. Thoughts of the past, the future, and how they didn't know what it would hold.

Michelle looked at her husband and smiled, "hey baby, where are you? You look like you're miles away."

"Yeah, I was just thinking about certain things and I got lost. I'm sorry, sweetheart," Tony replied.

"That's okay, I got lost too. We have so much to go through still, before we can be at peace, and it worries me so much. I don't want it all to tear us apart somehow.

I'm too happy to go into it just yet, but I want to go into it because I need it all to be over as soon as possible so we can get on with our lives and I…" she paused biting her lower lip.

"I just don't know what to do. I love you so much. The last thing I want is to lose you and I'm scared it will happen. I feel like I'd die if I end up apart from you again. I need you too much and I know I wouldn't be able to take it," Michelle said, her eyes filling with tears.

"Shhh…" Tony pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly, "we won't lose each other; it will all be fine. I love you and need you as much and don't want it to happen either. I get perfectly well what you mean; I have same fears as you do. But we'll take it slowly, one step at a time and see where it goes. The last thing I want is to lose you because I also know I wouldn't be able to take it, it would kill me. But that won't happen; we love each other too much to let it happen. We'll be okay, baby," he said kissing her.

"Now, let's not think about this anymore, this day was too amazing to spoil it with bad thoughts."

Michelle hugged him tightly, "yeah, we should only think happy thoughts."

They separated from their hug and took each other's hand and kept walking towards home.

"Do you think we'll be like Gianni and Gina almost 40 years from now?" Tony asked.

"Yeah, I think we will be, with only one difference," Michelle replied with a smile.

"What difference? We won't be as chubby?" Tony chuckled.

"No, silly," she slapped him on the hand lightly, laughing, "Although your and their cooking combined might get us there."

"What difference then?" Tony asked, still laughing.

Michelle stopped without letting go of his hand. She looked into his eyes.

"There will be more of us. There are only two of them and I'm hoping it will be at least four of us," she smiled before resuming walking without saying anything else.

Tony stopped and Michelle turned to look at him. He caressed her face and asked "What?"

"Those 3 years have been the best years of my life up to now, because I'm sure we'll have many more which will be as good or even better. I wouldn't change a single day of the 3 years we spent together, apart from the last one," Michelle said, gently touching his cheek.

"I loved every single day we spent together. I loved working with you all day and having you all to myself during the night. If that day didn't end the way it did, none of that probably would've changed. I still want to work with you again and if we remain alone forever, I won't complain. I will love it and I'll enjoy growing old all alone with you, because you're all that I need" she said, kissing him lightly on the lips.

Tony took both her hands and kissed them.

"When you got that job offer from Langley and I didn't, even though I had hoped I was wrong, I knew right away they wouldn't hire me just because they wanted you.

I didn't want you to miss that kind of opportunity because of me, so I started thinking about a different future for me. An idea kept growing stronger and stronger in my mind. Even though I wanted to work with you at Langley more than anything, I kept thinking how it wouldn't be a bad thing if I didn't get the job and became a housewife for a while because it would allow us to start a family," she smiled.

"What?" Tony asked again, he knew right from the start where she was going with this, but he couldn't say anything else before or now. The sudden mention of having a family together shocked him too much. And it was the most pleasurable shock he had in a long time.

"Yeah, I wanted us to have a baby; I never got a chance to tell you because I wanted to hear from Langley first. With only you working there, we would've been apart for most of the day and I didn't enjoy the prospect of that. No matter how much I wanted that baby, I wanted to keep working with you even more and I always thought we had more time to start a family. Then when I didn't get the job, I never had a chance to tell you what my plan was. We said we'd talk about it later and you know how that damn day went from there."

Tony just stared at her.

"When you ended up in that damn prison the thought of our child kept making me sad, because I wanted it even more and I was sure we would never be able to have one. But now we got a second chance and I want us to have a family.

That's one of the reasons why I want us to have a job that will let us have more time for ourselves. I want to keep working with you of course, but I don't want it to be 24/7 anymore. I want us to have a baby…

Well, two babies, at least."

Michelle started walking again, holding his hand tightly. She was talking so fast and sounding so happy that Tony just kept staring at her. He still couldn't say anything or show her how happy about the idea he was too, so he just listened to her, enjoying the happy sound of her voice and the idea of the happy future that he so desperately wanted them to have.

"Not right now of course but perhaps in a couple of years.

We already agreed we'll either start our own business or work together for some company after we take care of our problems, so that's settled.

Now we only have to add our baby into it all," she smiled.

"I want us to work together before I get pregnant and I want to keep working with you even after the baby comes.

Working together is something I love more than anything, and I know how much you love it too. I don't want to give it up, no matter what.

In case our business doesn't work out, the baby can come soon after we find jobs at the same company.

But in case it does work out, which I'm sure it will, it has to keep running for a while before we can even consider starting a family.

Because I don't want you to start our business alone or to be stuck at work all day, while I'm at home with the baby. I want us to start it together and run it for a while before it comes. That way you can be around the baby more once it does come and I can be home with it for a while in peace, so we have to take care of all of that first before I get pregnant."

Tony just stared at her, thinking how amazing she is, while she paused to take a breath and continued, "Also in case we do get the baby, I want us both around it as much as possible. I don't want us missing any part of its life because of a job; I don't want our jobs to be running our lives anymore. I want us to have more of a life outside the office.

We'll also have to remodel the house. We'll have to build rooms for the children and that will take time too, though it can be…" Michelle stopped when she realized that Tony hasn't been saying anything. She looked over at him with a huge smile on her face.

Tony kept staring at her with an obvious look of happiness in his eyes.

"Only if you want it too, of course," Michelle said, though by the look in his eyes she saw how much he wanted it.

On that Tony lifted her in his arms and spun her around.

He placed her back down on the sand and planted kisses all over her face, stopping on her lips, kissing her passionately for a while. Michelle hugged him tightly kissing him back just as passionately.

"You're so perfect; I love you so much. Of course I want us to have a child. I hope it's a little girl who will look just like you, with your perfect hair and eyes, your smile and your brains. I want her to be exactly like you," Tony said smiling.

"And I want a little boy, with your smile and your eyes, with hair just like yours. I want him to be as handsome and as smart as you. I want him to be exactly like you," Michelle replied happily. "I love you baby, so much."

"Then we'll have both, one of each. And they'll be perfect and beautiful just like their mother," Tony smiled and lifted her in his arms again, spinning her around.

Michelle placed her arms around his neck, hugging him, while he still held her tightly in his arms, "and like their father too."

"I'm sorry for being so quiet while you were telling me all of this, but I was shocked, and not in a bad way at all. I want our baby as much as you do. I couldn't say anything because the idea of it made me so happy I lost my voice for a minute. I want our happy future as much as you do, my love, and I'm sure we'll have it one day, maybe even sooner than we both think," Tony said kissing her again, without letting her out of his arms.

"I know we didn't talk about it in a long time, after we got married we said we'll have babies one day, but our careers were more important to us at that point, and it wasn't just that. The life we had on our own was too perfect to change, even though a baby would've been a pleasant change. But we both thought we had all the time in the world and then all the time got swept away in front of our eyes," she paused a moment, "but now, we can have an even better life with a job we'll enjoy and a child, because we got each other back and everything is possible again."

"I love you sweetheart, and I won't let anyone hurt you or take you away from me ever again, we'll be together forever this time, I promise," Tony replied.

"They better not try separating us again, or else…," Michelle winked, kissing him.

A few minutes later, rain started falling again. Tony took his jacket off and placed it over Michelle. He then grabbed her hand and they both started running towards their home with a constant smile on their faces. They stopped quite a few times to kiss each other; they didn't care about the rain or the inevitable bad things that were waiting for them before they could finally have the happy future they both wanted and needed so desperately. They were too happy, happy to be together and as in love.

When they reached their house, Tony and Michelle were both soaked. Taking their wet shoes off, they left them by the door and went into the bathroom.

Tony took his and Michelle's wet jackets and hung them on the bathroom door. He then went back to Michelle and lifted few of the wet curls from her face and kissed her.

"We better get you out of these wet clothes or you'll catch something," Tony smiled and started taking her clothes off, kissing every naked part of her body in the process.

When she was completely naked, Michelle unbuttoned his shirt, kissing his chest. "This rain only helped me to get my idea from before. We both need a nice, long bubble bath."

She turned the water on and added lots of bubble bath. While the tub was filling she turned back to Tony and started taking all of his clothes off, bit by bit, kissing all the naked parts of his body in the process just like he had done to her. When he was naked too, Tony lifted her in his arms, got into the tub and gently lowered her into his lap.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews._

Tony didn't have too much sleep the following night. He looked at the clock on the nightstand; it was 4:30am, an hour and a half to go before he had to wake her up.

Looking down at his wife, he saw she was sleeping peacefully with her head on his chest. They didn't sleep much the night before because they couldn't get enough of each other. "_Like we ever do_," Tony smiled to himself when he remembered the day before, kissing the top of her head.

He still couldn't believe they discussed having a baby. The idea of their child made him smile again. Tony imagined a tiny copy or two of his wife running around the house and he felt such a joy. Thinking about yesterday and everything they planned for their future made him happy. The whole thing still seemed unreal to him but a nagging fear about the future continued to tell him that the reality would kick in sooner or later.

In an hour he'd have to wake Michelle up and the dream they'd been living in for the past seven days would end.

She will go back to work to that hell hole he hated more than anything else. Even though they had met at CTU and had 4 amazing years there together, 3 of which while being married; Tony hated it now and he hated the idea of Michelle going back to work. He knew that she won't work there for much longer; they agreed on everything the night before already, 9 months at the most. Tony also knew that Michelle was in Division and not CTU. However, if there was a major terrorist event, she could easily be sent to CTU as poor Chappelle and Hammond had often been. Michelle wouldn't be able to refuse due to her position as Deputy Director of Division.

He was worried that something bad would happen and they'd end up apart somehow. That was the last thing either of them wanted. Tony needed her and he knew she needed him just as much. He needed to see and feel her close because he knew that he could do anything as long as Michelle was by his side.

The fact that he didn't have a job or a way to get her out of there as soon as possible made Tony feel terrible. It frustrated him to no end because he wanted to protect her, keep her safe and away from any harm but he couldn't.

Tony knew it would be close to impossible to find a job that he'd like doing with his resume, so he decided he'd wait 6 months at most to accept Gianni's offer. All he could do is hope that during those 6 months nothing bad would happen to her. Tony would accept it at once just to get her out of there as soon as possible, but he knew Michelle wouldn't want him to rush his decision on his future job, especially not because of her, so 6 months seemed right.

For the remainder of the hour, Tony spent it looking at Michelle as she slept peacefully in his arms and he kept caressing her back, enjoying feeling her close.

His mind was still racing an hour later but he didn't want to worry her with his dark thoughts or to worry her on her first day back at work. Tony knew she'd be able to tell right away that something was wrong. He also knew she is already worried on her own and he didn't want to add more to it.

When the time came to wake her up, Tony gently kissed the top of Michelle's head and caressed her face, "Michelle? Honey, you have to wake up, it's time for you to go to work," he said and gently stroked her back with the top of his fingers. He knew she had to go to work and that he had to wake her up, but he was in no hurry.

Tony kept hoping a storm would trap her in the house and keep her away from that place. He wanted to keep her in his arms and protect her, for one more day at least, but he knew that's not going to happen.

The day he feared finally came.

A few minutes later Michelle opened her eyes and smiled to him, "good morning sweetheart. How come you're not still sleeping? We didn't really sleep for a long time last night."

"No, we didn't," he smiled.

"I woke up a few minutes ago and realized I had to wake you up to go to work," Tony said with a sad look on his face that he tried to hide quickly, but he wasn't fast enough.

"Oh my love… I don't want to go either, but I have to. I can't just abandon that place, even though I want to. I don't want to move from your side for one second but I have to go back there. But in 9 months, or maybe even sooner, I'll leave it forever and we'll start our happy future together, away from all of that, you'll see."

"I know baby, and I can't wait for that day to come," Tony replied.

"It will sweetheart, sooner than you think."

Michelle lifted herself up to his lips. They kissed and cuddled for a while.

"We should get up; you have to eat something before you go. You can take a shower while I make you something to eat, I'll shower later."

"We'll take that shower together and you can make me something to eat while I get dressed for work," Michelle replied.

"I can live with that," Tony grinned.

They got up and went into the shower together. For the next half hour, they enjoyed kissing, caressing, bathing each other and simply taking pleasure in their time together.

When they got out of the shower, Tony put on his robe and gently dried Michelle for a bit, kissing her shoulders and neck. "I wish I could stay in here with you and dry you some more. I doubt I would stop there too, but we don't have enough time. I have to get that breakfast ready. I can't have you going hungry to work," he said between the kisses.

"Okay, but you have to promise me that when I come home, I'll have you all to myself and we'll pick up where we left off," Michelle said going with her fingers through his hair.

"You bet, I'm not letting you out of my sight or out of my arms, for that matter, when you come home," Tony smiled.

"You better dry off and get dressed now; I'll go start that breakfast. You shouldn't be late," he kissed her cheek, turned around and walked out of the bathroom.

Michelle remained alone and started drying herself off. She knew he hurried out of there so he wouldn't say something that would cause her to worry.

However, it didn't help. She was completely worried about him just like he was about her. Michelle didn't know how he'll handle it all. Being out of work wasn't something he was used to and getting a good job after what happened would be close to impossible. Finding something he'd enjoy would be even harder and she knew some stupid job would frustrate him all the more.

Michelle was scared he'd keep all his frustrations bottled up inside to protect her and that the pain would destroy him, that it would destroy them and what they had together.

Tony was an amazing man, but like her, he was very stubborn when he thought he was doing the right thing and Michelle knew he thought the right thing was to protect her from everything and handle it on his own.

She wanted to force him to talk about what was bothering them both so they could continue their life in peace. However, Michelle realized she would never get anything out of him, only what he was willing to share. She didn't want to start because she didn't want to add more worries into his mind. Michelle kept thinking the time will come for it all to come out; she was just scared it will be too late.

When she finished dressing up, Michelle took her wallet out of her bag and pulled their debit card out. She had to give it to him so he could go to the store, but she knew that by giving it to him she'd hurt his feelings, which was the last thing she wanted to do.

Michelle stood there looking at the card, thinking how to give it to him without noticing him behind her.

Tony came from behind and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her neck, "hey gorgeous, your breakfast is getting cold, what are you still doing here?" Tony asked and then he noticed the card Michelle was holding in her hand.

Even though she knew he had to see it and knew there was no point of doing it, her first instinct was to hide the card from him.

Michelle turned around and looked him in the eyes; she noticed the change in his face when he saw the card, even though he tried to hide it.

"Honey, I have to give this to you. You'll have to buy things we'll need around here while I'm at work. We can do it together when I come back home, but you might need something before that. You have to eat too and everything we bought 7 days ago is gone… Don't think much of it, just use it like you used to, when both our paychecks were on it. I know it's not the same and I know it bothers you, but everything will turn out okay in the end," she kissed his cheek.

Tony looked at the card for a few more seconds before looking into her eyes. He saw how much this whole thing worried her and he wanted to protect her from all of it; knowing he couldn't was killing him, but he didn't want to deal with it now.

He took a deep breath, "Michelle… You're right; it does bother me. But I'll have to live with it until I find a job."

Smiling, Tony took the card from her and put it on the nightstand, "come on, you have to go eat or you'll be late."

Tony knew Michelle wasn't convinced but he also knew she won't push the subject and she didn't.

Michelle just smiled and hugged him, "Okay baby, but you know you can always talk to me about anything that's bothering you, right?"

"Yeah, I know that sweetheart; I just don't want to go into it now. There will be plenty of time to do it, but we had an amazing week together. I don't want to ruin the memory of it by going into the problems just yet. Right now, you have to go to work, so let's focus on that," Tony replied.

"Yeah, and that's another thing that bothers you. There are so many things that bother us both, and I hate it, I just want it all to be over already. I want to close my eyes and when I open them, I want our business to run and us planning our baby," Michelle said, leaning her head on his chest.

"I want that too, more than anything," Tony replied, hugging her tightly.

"But it can't be done; we have to deal with it. I know we both want to avoid it, but no matter how much we wanted to do it, we can't."

"I know sweetheart, I know, but right now, you have to go to work and we can't go into this. I want you to go to work happily, as much as you can be. Besides, we don't have enough time to deal with it all now, but I promise you, we will... Now come on, let's eat."

Even though she knew they won't discuss it any time soon Michelle just smiled, "Let's go."

They sat down and ate, avoiding subjects that bothered them, even though both of their minds were on them.

When they finished their breakfast, Michelle looked at Tony but he avoided looking into her eyes.

She walked towards him and cupped his face, "honey, it's going to be okay."

Tony looked into her eyes; it was obvious how much it all bothered him, "just come home to me, alright?"

Michelle kissed him and hugged him tightly, "I will honey, I promise. Don't worry so much, everything will be fine. I'll work there for 9 months tops. I'm not at CTU, but at Division and I doubt I'll be going back there unless it's some emergency. And since Jack is in Washington, we'll be okay," she winked, trying to cheer him up.

Tony smiled, but his face got serious in a second, "I know, it's an irrational fear, but I just can't help it. I know we had a lot of good times there too, but too many bad things happened to us over there. I don't want to lose you.

I'll count the seconds till you come home," Tony said hugging her tightly.

"I'll be home soon," Michelle caressed his hair. "I love you, baby."

"I love you too," Tony replied.

A few minutes later Michelle drove off to work and Tony remained alone.

Tony felt awful on his own, both in the house and outside, he missed her smile, her voice, and having her around. Since he just got out of prison, having Michelle around all the time helped him feel better in more ways than one. When they were together, he talked to her and spent all his time with her. Now when she was at work, he was all alone and so many dark thoughts flooded his mind, making him feel even worse.

The only bright time of his day was when Michelle called, but that lasted only a few minutes because she had a lot of work to do.

When he had to take the card and go shopping, it was the worst of all. He felt useless again because he was buying food with his wife's money and not their money like he was used to. Tony wanted to find a job right away and get out of all of this but he knew it wouldn't be easy, but he said to himself that he'd make it soon and then everything would change.

When he got home, Tony went online right away and started looking; he was disappointed when he found very little that was worth applying for. He applied to a few positions but decided not to tell Michelle about those because he was sure he won't get them. Since this was the first day that he started looking, Tony still didn't feel too bad about not finding anything special.

He turned the computer off and spent the rest of the day preparing what he'd do with Michelle when she came home.

Driving to Division, Michelle thought about last seven days and it brought a smile to her face. She still couldn't believe she got her husband back. Michelle knew it wouldn't be easy and that they have lots of hard times to go through before they could be in peace, but they were together, and right now, that was the only thing that mattered to her.

Arriving at Division, she had a smile on her face for the first time since she started working there. Michelle smiled to herself when she noticed how some of her co-workers looked at her when she said "Hi" to them with a smile on her face. She was never rude to any of them, but thanks to all her problems, she was distant and seemed cold. Right now, Michelle felt completely different and knew she looked different too.

She went into her office and spent the entire day working on things that piled up during the previous week. Her job lost the fun it used to have, she couldn't wait to get out of there and put her and Tony's plans into action.

Michelle called her husband during her lunch break, but didn't talk to him for long, because she had a lot of work to do and wanted to go home quickly.

The rest of the day she spent buried in her work, her mind drifted more than once to Tony and how much she missed him and how she couldn't wait to be with him again.

Four hours later Michelle went home and when she came out of the car, Tony was already waiting for her with a huge smile on his face holding a basket and a blanket.

Michelle walked towards her husband and stopped in front of him, "Hey there, I missed you so much," she said, caressing his face.

Tony sat the basket and blanket on the porch and hugged her, "I missed you too," he buried his face into her neck. "You have no idea how much."

Michelle smiled and planted kisses all over his face. When she reached his lips they kissed for a while.

"Are you hungry?" Tony asked.

"I'm starving," Michelle replied.

"Good, I was hoping you'll say that. Since it's warmer tonight, I decided to make us a picnic basket. I thought it would be nice to go down to our favorite spot under the house and have a picnic. If you still feel like walking after we eat, we can."

"Sounds like a wonderful idea, I missed our picnics," Michelle replied, "Let's go."

Tony picked up the basket and blanket, took her hand, and they walked down to the beach.

When they reached their favorite spot by the rocks, Tony stretched the blanket on the sand and placed the basket on it. He sat down and extended his hands towards Michelle. She took them and he pulled her down, sitting her in his lap, hugging her tightly.

They sat like that for a while without talking, enjoying feeling each other close.

After some time Michelle scooted over next to him. Tony opened the basket, pulled out two candlesticks and lit them.

He then pulled out their dinner, "So how was your day?" Tony asked.

"Boring, like I told you on the phone. I missed you so much. I hated going there while you were in prison, but it gave me something to do. And now when I got you back I hate it twice as much because I like what I'm doing while I'm at home so much more," she smiled.

"They were all shocked when they saw me though. Today was the first time I came there with a smile on my face. I think some of them nearly had a heart attack. I didn't act like I used to, I wasn't too friendly with any of them. I wasn't rude, but I didn't try to become friends with them. I was only acting in a business way. I didn't feel like smiling or socializing at all.

Like I told you, Bill was the only friend I had over there, and only because we had to spend so much time together; otherwise I would've ignored him just like I ignored everyone else.

He became a good friend to me; I feel bad for him. His wife left him thanks to his job. She got tired of being alone all the time and somewhere along the way they drifted apart and couldn't solve their problems anymore. They didn't have any children. He has no one to go home to, unlike me," Michelle leaned over and kissed him.

"That's why we got along so well while you were away, we could share our misery. Though his wife doesn't love him anymore like I always knew you loved me. Even though we were apart and you pushed me away, I knew we'd get back together somehow, while he lost all his hope and he still loves her. It's so sad when people separate like that, for whatever reason, after being together and in love. Especially if one or both are still in love, but thanks to their problems they can't be together anymore," she said and looked at him.

Tony knew what she was thinking so he got up and sat behind her, pulling her into his arms. "Yeah, it is. I can't imagine how that poor man must be feeling. I couldn't live without you. That will never happen to us, no matter what. We were apart long enough and it will never happen again," he said, kissing her hair. "We'll work our problems out before it happens, I promise."

"I hope so because I don't know what I would do without you either. I couldn't bear being apart from you ever again."

"You'll never be without me again; I don't know what could keep me away from you. Don't you worry, I'll bug you till we're both old and gray," Tony smiled.

"Good and I'll bug you too," Michelle replied, kissing his cheek soundly. "You know I could never stop loving you, right?"

"Yeah baby, that I know for sure, just like I know I could never stop loving you either. That's why I know we'll be together forever. We'll never be apart again; we love each other too much to let anything bad happen to our marriage."

"Yeah, we do and I know we won't let it happen. We'll take care of it all soon and everything will be fine," Michelle replied, caressing his face. "So, how was your day?"

"Boring, I went to the shopping mall and bought groceries with all the other good housewives," Tony smiled.

"When I got home I looked for a job. There was nothing special, so I didn't apply for anything. Afterwards I cooked dinner for us, cleaned the house a bit, watched the TV… Then I prepared our basket and waited for you to come home. You know the rest."

"Something will come soon," Michelle said.

"I know, I just have to keep looking, it's only been a day. Want to keep eating?"

"Yeah," Michelle replied.

They continued to eat in peace and flirted a lot. When their dinner was finished, they placed everything back in the basket. Michelle then climbed into Tony's lap, leaning her head on his chest and closing her eyes. He hugged her tightly, covering them with the other end of the blanket.

They didn't talk, so Tony didn't realize right away that Michelle was asleep, he only realized it when her breathing changed.

Kissing her hair, he said, "Ready to go for our walk? I'm getting cold and I know you are too."

When Michelle didn't reply, Tony looked at her and realized that she was fast asleep. He didn't want to wake her up because she looked peaceful, but he was scared that she might catch a cold and the position they were in wasn't too comfortable for a long time.

Tony lifted her head gently and kissed her nose, "Wake up, sweetheart."

Michelle opened her eyes and smiled to him, "Hey honey. Did I fell asleep?"

"Yeah, you did baby. I had to wake you up because this isn't a position where either of us can get any real rest and you look like you need it."

"You're right; I must be more tired than I thought. I think that walk will have to wait till tomorrow," Michelle yawned.

"Yeah, it will. Come on sweetheart, let's get you to bed."

They got up and folded the blanket together. Tony picked it up along with the basket and took Michelle's hand.

They came into their house a few minutes later. Tony sat the basket on the kitchen counter and emptied everything into the sink and started washing it. Michelle took the blanket and placed it at the bottom of the cabinet. When she was done she walked back to Tony, who was still busy cleaning the plates, and hugged him from behind, leaning her head on his back.

"Why don't we put those into the dish washer? It's getting late," she whispered in his ear, "and I missed you all day. You did promise me we'll pick up where we left off this morning," she kissed his neck.

Tony turned around, hugging her, "I thought you were tired," he smiled.

"Not that tired," Michelle winked. "I'm never that tired," she kissed him passionately.

Tony picked her up and carried her to their bed.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews._

Another rejection… some lame excuse again.

Tony crumpled the paper and tossed it across the living room. He couldn't take it anymore; he'd been trying so hard during the past 6 months to get a job, to pick up what was left of his professional life and move on, and yet every job he applied for, he got rejected.

Even though no one told him in his face that it was because he was a traitor, Tony knew that it was the reason and he felt so angry about it.

His career was half of his life; his job mattered so much to him. The only time he went against the rules was when it threatened to take away the only thing that mattered to him more than that job and more than his own life. Because saving his wife was more important to him than anything else, he got tossed in jail like a common criminal.

Tony didn't regret for a second what he did. He was sure he'd remain in prison for the rest of his life because of it and he was ready and willing to do it. But when he got pardoned and got his wife back, Tony hoped that there might be a chance for him to start a new life and move on from the past. However, day after day that hope kept getting smaller. Even though the job at Gianni's was waiting for him, and he knew he wouldn't get a better boss, Tony kept hoping for something more interesting; along the lines of what his and Michelle's future business would be and that way it might have some better future. However, all of that seemed further away by a day. Tony knew that after what he did, he wouldn't be able to work for the Government anymore, but he was sure he'd be able to find a job in a security or computer company. Despite how hard he tried and how many jobs he applied to, no one seemed to want him and it frustrated him to no end.

His depression was deep but he didn't tell Michelle about it. Tony wanted to handle it on his own. He knew how much she loved him and how worried about it all she already was; he didn't want to add more worries to her mind. However, as more time passed, the more he saw that he couldn't handle it on his own and each rejection made him more depressed and each one made him drink. He would find ways for Michelle not to notice it by the time she'd get home and he knew she wouldn't push the subject. Tony would just tell her he was depressed about not being able to find a job, but that he'd get the next one before changing the subject. He knew that he wasn't fooling her, but he also knew that she didn't know everything and what she didn't know couldn't hurt her, or so he thought.

Tony kept hiding things from Michelle hoping he might get the next job and then it would all be over. He kept hoping that after he got a job, they'd sit down and talk about everything that bothered them, clear it all up, and move on. Without Michelle by his side nothing mattered to him and with this rejection, Tony felt like his world was disappearing in front of his eyes and that he'd lose her and every chance of having a happy future together.

He knew Michelle was hoping he'd get this job too and was waiting for him to call her and tell her what happened. However, he couldn't pick up the phone and disappoint her yet again.

Tony looked at the beer bottles in front of him; he didn't even know why he bought them all. The last few times during his crisis when he drank, it didn't help him and he knew these won't help him either, but he kept drinking one after the other until he passed out…

In the meantime, Michelle was at work. She couldn't concentrate on it during the whole day because she couldn't stop thinking about the answer about the job that was supposed to arrive for Tony. Michelle kept hoping he'd get it, even though somehow she knew he won't.

During the past 6 months she desperately tried to find a way to talk to Tony about what was bothering them but she didn't want to push it because it was obvious that he didn't want to talk about it. Michelle could see how miserable about all of it he was, but since he didn't let her in on it and tried his best to hide it from her, she didn't know half of it. It didn't worry her any less though, the little she knew worried her and the things she didn't know and knew he was hiding worried her even more. However, Michelle was sure that once he got a job, they'd talk about it and everything would be over so she just hoped he'd get a job soon.

When an hour passed from the time he was supposed to call her, Michelle got concerned, but thought he'd call her during the lunch break or she'd call him. When she did finally call, there was no reply and it made her worry all the more, because they always talked to each other during the lunch break. Michelle kept hoping he'd call her soon but when he didn't call an hour after the break, she called him repeatedly on his cell phone and left him messages. When he didn't reply for two hours, it scared her to death. Michelle wanted to drop everything and run home to him; see that he was okay, but she couldn't leave the office; she had an unavoidable meeting.

When the meeting was over, Michelle told Bill that she wasn't feeling well and that she had to go home and lay down for a while. Bill told her she could go and asked her if she needed a ride. Michelle thanked him but told him she'd manage on her own.

The ride home seemed to take longer than ever before. Michelle was scared and worried about her husband. She had no idea what to expect at home but she knew it won't be good. Michelle kept calling him but there was no reply.

When she finally entered their house, Michelle called out his name but there was no reply.

The first thing she noticed was that the shopping bags were still sitting on the kitchen counter, untouched. By this time Tony would have already finished cooking their dinner and would be waiting for her so they could go for their usual walk before they ate. However, the bags were sitting there, probably since that morning when he had returned from the store.

Michelle started panicking, thinking where he was and what might've happened to him. Right in front of her on the floor she noticed a crumpled piece of paper. Picking it up Michelle knew right away what it was and even before opening it, she knew why he didn't reply to her all day. Turning around she saw him passed out on the couch and ran towards him, thinking he was sick. Michelle couldn't imagine that Tony passed out because he was drunk until she kicked all the beer bottles that were on the floor in front of the couch.

She couldn't grasp what was happening; she looked at him for a few seconds not believing her eyes. Seeing him like that for the first time, Michelle fully realized what this whole situation was doing to him. Michelle was sad that he went to alcohol before he went to her for help, but she knew why he was doing it, to protect her, and it made her feel horrible to imagine how much her husband must've suffered before he got to this state. What made her feel even worse was that he suffered on his own. She knew he was depressed about the whole situation and that he felt horribly about it all, but because he kept most of it to himself, she had no idea how bad he actually was.

Michelle sat on the coffee table in front of the couch and caressed his face. "Tony, wake up. It's me, Michelle. Wake up, baby." Looking at him like that, she could hardly stop herself from bursting into tears.

A few minutes later Tony opened his eyes and looked at her. Even though he was very drunk, the minute he saw her looking at him at the verge of tears, he felt ashamed because he never wanted her to see him like that.

"Michelle… go away, leave me alone, just go away, don't… I don't want you around me, just leave me alone. I need to be alone, go away, go to sleep, go…" he mumbled pushing her hand away from him and turning his back to her.

Michelle started crying, tears were running down her cheeks. She leaned her hand on his back, "baby, please don't push me away. I want to help you, we can get through this together; just don't push me away, please… Tony, look at me."

Tony suddenly turned around and yelled at her, "I told you to leave me alone! What are you still doing here? Didn't I tell you to go to sleep? I don't want to look at you; don't you see that I can't?

You remind me of everything bad that happened to me and I can't look at you.

If you love me and you want what's best for me, you'll leave me alone. I want to be alone, so just go…" he said turning around again.

For some time, Michelle couldn't move. She couldn't believe what just happened. Feeling as though her brain was completely blank, she couldn't even think. Michelle didn't try to say anything else or try to touch him because she knew it was pointless. She just sat there for over an hour and stared at him, crying silently.

When she gathered the strength to get up, Michelle walked to the bathroom, feeling as though she'd fall down. Her mind felt blank and she felt drained from all the crying, so she thought a warm bath might relax her and calm her down a bit. She poured the warm water into the tub and added some smelling salts to calm her down. Michelle lay in there for nearly two hours until her skin was all wrinkled but it didn't help. She couldn't stop crying; all she could think about was him; how much she already missed him around her. She kept waiting for him to come through the door with a smile on his face like nothing happened and join her like always. Michelle was completely worried about her husband; what just happened between them kept coming back into her mind. Her fear for him and of losing him didn't let her be in peace; she couldn't calm down and the uncertainty of what will happen between them made her more and more upset.

She was scared that they would end up apart forever. All of this at once was too much for Michelle. Her nightmares were back and wouldn't go away. After getting out of the tub, she decided to take something to help her sleep. Opening the cabinet, she grabbed 2 sleeping pills and drank them both with a glass of water.

Michelle wanted to go right to bed, but couldn't; she slowly walked towards the couch where her husband was sleeping and looked at him for some time. She wished she could lay down next to him, hold him, and comfort him, but she knew it wasn't a good idea. He told her that he wanted her to leave him alone and no matter how much she wanted to do the opposite, Michelle decided to respect his wishes. She caressed his face and kissed him; then took the blanket that was folded on the back of the couch, the one they always used to wrap themselves in together, and covered him up with it. Kissing him again she whispered "I love you" in his ear and walked away not wanting her tears to drop on Tony and wake him up.

Walking to the bed, Michelle felt even worse and couldn't stop crying, not believing she was going to bed without him. When he came home from prison, she thought it would never happen again, not like this anyway. She could feel the pills kicking in as she became drowsier with every step she took. Michelle lay down on the bed and clutched his pillow, breathing his scents in like she used to do while he was in prison. Soon after that she fell asleep, but didn't have any rest.

A few hours later while Michelle was asleep, Tony woke up.

He had some memories of what happened and instantly felt horrible about it. When he realized that Michelle covered him up with the blanket, Tony imagined what she went through during the last hours. Tony said all of that knowing he'd push her away by saying it, not because he meant a single word of it. Knowing he couldn't talk to her normally and explain things to her in that state, he thought the best thing would be to push her away until he could; being ashamed of the state he was in and for being drunk in the first place. He didn't want her to look at him like that. But now when he was thinking a bit more clearly about what he said and did, Tony realized what a terrible mistake he made. The last thing he wanted was to hurt her and that was the exact thing he did by pushing her away and talking to her like that yet again. Imagining how hurt Michelle must be right now made him feel even worse. Tony tried to get up and go to his wife, tell her that he loved her more than his life, that he didn't mean a single word of it, and that he wanted her with him more than anything. However, the minute he got up, he felt dizzy and fell back on the couch. More than anything, he wanted to sort it out right away and stop her from hurting even more, but due to the effects of the alcohol, he knew he couldn't. Tony decided to tell her everything in the morning, after he started feeling better because right now he couldn't even get up again.

Cursing himself for hurting her again, for drinking in the first place, and for hiding his real state from her, Tony fell back asleep.

Michelle woke up much earlier than usual; she hardly slept at all or had any real rest. When she saw that his side of the bed was empty and that his arms weren't wrapped tightly around her, Michelle realized that last night wasn't just a horrible nightmare and it made her very upset again.

She slowly calmed herself down, got up and got ready to go to work. Walking over to the couch she saw Tony still fast asleep. Michelle leaned over him and looked at him for a while; she still couldn't believe what was happening. Looking at him like that made her want to cry again; her eyes were quickly filling with tears. Not wanting to go to work upset, Michelle knew she couldn't look at him in that state anymore. Covering him up a bit more, she caressed his face and kissed him. Whispering "I love you" in his ear, she hurried out of their home before she couldn't stop herself from sobbing again.

Getting out of the house two hours earlier than usual and since she didn't feel like eating anything, Michelle decided to drive around to clear her mind, but it didn't help.

Michelle didn't want anyone from work to notice that they had any problems; she wanted to keep their personal life private like they had always done. Neither of them wanted anyone to intrude into their privacy and they always made sure to keep their personal life as far away from CTU as possible.

Michelle also knew that people already saw Tony in the wrong light; she didn't want that to get even worse and ruin his future even more.

But no matter how hard Michelle wanted to fight it until her shift was over, her mind kept going back to the previous night, still not believing that it actually happened.

She knew he loved her and even though deep inside, just like last time, she knew that he didn't mean it, the same what ifs kept popping into her mind.

Pulling the car to the side of the road, Michelle did her best to calm herself down. Not wanting to be upset when she arrived at Division; she barely managed to stop herself from crying.

An hour later when Michelle reached her office at Division, she couldn't really concentrate on her work. Even though she tried her best to avoid it, her mind kept going back to her husband, the way he looked the previous night and the things he said. She was completely concerned about him.

Fortunately Michelle didn't have too much to do so she told Bill that she was not feeling well yet and asked him if she could go home early.

Bill told her that it was fine and if she felt bad in the morning she could stay home or come in later if she started feeling better. He only told her to call him and tell him if she'd come at all tomorrow or not and offered her a ride home. Michelle thanked him again and said she'd be okay on her own.

She left Division but didn't want to go home; she couldn't face him just yet, not knowing what his reaction would be when he sees her.

Driving around, Michelle had no idea where she'd go.

In the end, she decided to get something to eat and stop at the park; thinking food and fresh air might help her a bit.

When Michelle arrived at the park she found an empty bench and sat down to eat a donut she bought on her way; eating it without even knowing what she was eating. Michelle couldn't stop thinking about Tony, she was completely worried about him and wanted to call him and see if he was okay. She wanted to go home and see him, but no matter how much she wanted to, thinking it wasn't what he wanted, she decided not to.

Everything that was going on was making her scared and worried. She tried to calm down and shake her mind off the previous night for a bit because she couldn't take it all at once, but couldn't.

All of her nightmares came back and nothing could shake them away anymore.

Michelle managed to control all of them a bit during the past 6 months because, even though they all still bothered her, her happiness of being back in Tony's arms was stronger. However, hearing again that he couldn't look at her because she reminded him of everything bad that happened to him triggered all of her nightmares to came back and just like last time they made her feel horrible. Michelle had a pretty good idea why he acted like that and knew there wasn't any truth in the things he said.

They never had any secrets and even though she knew he loved her as much as she loved him, the things he said hurt her twice as much because of everything he had been refusing to deal with and those things scared her the most.

Michelle didn't know what to do; she wanted to make him feel better but she didn't know how to do it, because she felt horrible herself. She wanted them to work it out, more than anything, but she didn't know if they would.

Michelle kept being afraid that the pain she was so afraid of would win and that she'd lose her husband.

Not being able to sit anymore, Michelle got up and started walking around.

She had no idea how much time passed, her mind kept racing and it didn't let her calm down. It kept going back to the seven days of her vacation when he was released from prison and how happy they were during those days without any worry in the world, just like they were before that horrible day. When Michelle remembered the conversation about the plans for their future and about their child, it made her cry again. Sitting down on the bench again, Michelle thought how it would be impossible to have it all, how it was as far away from coming true as it was during the time he was in the prison.

She wanted it all more than anything and even though Michelle knew Tony wanted it as much and knew that he loved her as much as she loved him, she kept thinking that their plans would never happen. No matter how much she loved her husband and didn't want to lose him, she wanted him to be as happy as he could be, even if it meant away from her. Even though she didn't want to and the very idea was killing her, Michelle was ready to leave him if that would make him feel better.

Michelle knew the time to clear everything finally came; she was just scared it came too late.

Everything that was going on in her mind and everything that still might happen was killing her so she decided to prolong the whole thing and sit in that park some more. Michelle needed to gather the strength for what might happen in the next few hours. Her entire life might change and she couldn't face it all just yet.

Michelle switched her phone off when she arrived at the Division that morning like she would do every day without switching it back on during the lunch break, like always, thinking her husband wouldn't call her.

She didn't switch the phone on even after she left Division, not wanting to be called back to work and not expecting him to call; she wanted to be alone with her thoughts. Leaving it off also stopped her from calling him, no matter how much she wanted to. Michelle missed him so much it hurt; she couldn't stop thinking about him. She wanted to hear his voice and hear if he was okay, not knowing was killing her, but she decided not to call him. Thinking he wanted to be away from her she left it off all day long, sure that it was the right thing to do, that he needed a break from her and because of that all of Tony's voice and text messages went unheard.

An hour and a half after Michelle left the house Tony woke up on the couch with a bad headache; the blanket he was covered in instantly reminded him of what happened again. Imagining how bad Michelle must've felt when she couldn't reach him, when she saw him like that, when he yelled at her, all night long and how bad she must still be feeling, he felt horrible.

Tony's head was throbbing and he felt a shooting pain when he lifted his head, but he got up immediately and looked for her because he wanted to explain his actions right away. When he didn't find her anywhere in the house, Tony thought that she left to work and he probably just missed her.

He wanted to kill himself for making her feel that way, he hated himself for drinking, for hiding things from her, for all the things he could've done to prevent this, but didn't do…

Tony was sure that by hiding so much from her and pushing her away from him like that the previous night, he hurt her too much and pushed her away for real. He was certain that he ruined the possibility of them ever having the future together. Future both of them wanted.

It was not because he thought she didn't love him anymore, on contrary, Tony knew Michelle loved him as much as he loved her. When he saw all the pain in her eyes the night before, he saw all the love and all the worry in them too. Remembering how she looked last night and that all of it was his fault, felt like a kick in the gut for him.

Tony knew that even though Michelle knew he loved her and didn't mean any of the things he said to her, that she was probably thinking he would be better off without her.

Knowing that she'd do anything for his happiness and peace, just like he would, Tony was scared that no matter what he says to her when she came home, she'd leave, thinking that was the right thing to do and they'd end up apart, even though that was the last thing either of them wanted.

He was aware that making their life as perfect as she deserved would be close to impossible. However, he was sure that together they'd make it perfect even if it wasn't exactly as they planned it on the last day of her vacation.

Tony was determined to keep his wife even if he remained a cook for the rest of his life, because he knew that if they ended up apart, nothing would matter. So long as they're together their life would be perfect no matter what they did and he wanted to make sure Michelle knew that. Tony wanted to call her right away to tell her that and apologize for his behavior first, but he decided not to; he wanted to get himself together first.

His head was still throbbing and he felt sick so he took aspirins for his head and went into the shower. Afterwards, he got something to eat, even though like Michelle, he didn't have too much appetite.

His mind kept going back to her hurt face and how much his behavior hurt her feelings and it was killing him. He knew he could've prevented it but he was too stubborn as usual, thinking he was doing the right thing. And now, thanks to him and his foolish behavior, Michelle was hurt and suffering, which was the last thing he ever wanted.

Tony decided to let it all out, to tell her everything like he should've done long time ago; he wanted to clear it all up once and for all.

He wanted to assure Michelle that he didn't want to lose her and that he'd do anything to keep her. Tony kept regretting for wording the things he said that way, he only wanted her to leave him alone till he sobered up, so he can explain his actions to her. He didn't want her to look at him in the state he was, but being so drunk and her not wanting to leave, he had no choice. He said it because he knew it would push her away, just like it did the first time and just like the first time he saw how much they hurt her. Now he deeply regretted it, even more than after the first time, because back then Tony was sure that he was doing the right thing, for her safety, and this time it was only because of his stupidity. Tony hated himself for the words that came out of his mouth and he couldn't wait to explain it all to his wife. The things he had said to push her away he had done, once because he was afraid for her and now, even though he hated himself because of it, because he was ashamed of how she saw him. Never for a moment did he actually mean what he said.

Tony also decided to call Gianni and accept his job offer but to still keep looking for something else while working for him, because he realized that he'd feel much better and far more useful if he wasn't at the house all day long.

However, Tony decided that he won't let himself get down if the rejections continued, because once again, he realized that his job meant nothing to him if she wasn't by his side. He didn't care what he'd do for the rest of his life, it didn't seem important to him anymore; the only thing that mattered to him was keeping Michelle. Tony felt ashamed that it got him so down in the first place, but even though he didn't want it, he couldn't help it. He was determined to fix it all this time. And he knew that as long as he manages to keep Michelle, he'd do it.

When he came up with all his plans, Tony started feeling a bit better so he decided to call Michelle. Even though he knew her phone would be off, he hoped she left it on by mistake or something because he wanted to hear her voice. When she didn't answer he thought that she was at some business meeting or just left her phone off like usual. Since he didn't want to call her through the office line; he decided to call her again later. Instead he called Gianni.

"Hey Gianni, it's me, Tony."

"Hey Tony, what's up? How are you and Michelle, you didn't come here for a few days."

Tony didn't let anyone know about his problems, he kept it all to himself, and he didn't want Gianni to know about them either, so he just replied, "we're fine. Sorry we didn't come for a while, we ate at home, but we thought about you guys a lot. I promise you, we'll come in a few days."

"It's okay, I'm glad you two are fine. I know how much the whole thing about you not being able to find a job bothered you both, even though you didn't tell us much about it. Gina and I were worried about you."

Tony still didn't say anything. "Yeah, it bothered us a lot, that's why I'm calling. Does that job offer still stand? I'd like to accept it, if that's okay with you."

"I'm so happy to hear that, of course it still stands. It will always stand for you."

"Are you sure? You're not just saying it because it's me and you want to help me but you actually don't need any help at all and by paying me, you'd be only losing money? You know I'd find out if that's the case and I'd leave the very minute.

I can be a cook or something like that anywhere else, if you don't need help. There's no other place I'd rather work at the moment, but the last thing I want is to be a dead weight, especially to you, who helped me and Michelle so much."

"Of course I'm sure. Gina is bugging me to get help anyway, and there's no one else I'd rather hire, even if it will be for only short time. You can work with me until you find something else or start your own business. We can find someone else who might help me after you leave and we can teach them together. I wish you came to me sooner, you could've worked for me while looking for something else…"

"That's exactly what I want to do now. Thank you Gianni, I'll love training someone with you and working for you. Who knows, maybe you'll be stuck with me for a long time if I don't find something else."

"You know nothing would make me happier, my son. But you'll find something soon, you'll see."

"Thanks again Gianni, I'll come to work first thing Monday morning. I still didn't say anything to Michelle about your offer or about me accepting it. I want to be the one to tell her, so if you see her, don't tell her anything."

"Okay Tony, I won't tell her anything if she comes here. I'll see you Monday morning."

"See you on Monday. Maybe even sooner, if Michelle and I decide to drop by for lunch or dinner."

"Gina and I would be happy to see you both. Bye."

"Bye."

When Tony hung up the phone he felt bad straight away because he didn't know if he'd go there with Michelle ever again. Even though somehow he knew everything would be fine and that they'd take care of their problems, the same what ifs bothered him, just like they bothered her.

An hour later Tony called Michelle again but she didn't reply. It wasn't strange that she didn't return his calls before lunch because it was the only time they talked. He hated calling the Division and she knew it so they agreed from her first day to talk only during the break. Even though he knew it was still off, Tony hoped that she switched it on. He wanted to talk to his wife badly but he couldn't reach her. Tony decided to wait for the lunch break, no matter how much he wanted to hear her voice and say at least "I'm sorry" so she knows it until he explains everything to her that night.

He started getting worried a few hours later when she didn't call him during the lunch break. Michelle would usually call him to see how he was or she would turn her phone on for him to call her, but her phone was off. He left her a message saying, "I love you so much, I'm so sorry about last night, call me, please."

Tony knew that she was still upset and he figured that was the reason why she didn't call him or turn her phone on, but it still made him worry.

He wanted to make dinner for them while waiting for her to come home after work, but he was getting worried and couldn't concentrate on cooking, so he decided not to cook and just wait for her. Tony figured they wouldn't have too much appetite anyway and he can always make something fast or they can order in, if they decided that they wanted to eat.

He was even more worried when she didn't reply to his message from before when her shift was over.

When Michelle didn't come home two hours after the usual time without calling him, he started panicking.

Tony repeatedly called her on her phone, leaving her both voice and text messages; when she didn't reply to any of that for another two hours he started calling everywhere they would go together. He even called Gianni and Gina, but didn't let them know why he was looking for her.

Tony didn't find her anywhere, he even called the Division but they told him she left hours ago.

When he heard that, he started panicking even more and got scared that something happened to her, he started blaming himself for the way he acted, for treating her that way, scared that she might be hurt who knows where.

After couple of more hours passed, Tony decided to call all the hospitals and anywhere else he could think of.

Soon he ran out of options; he wanted to go look for her but didn't know where to go; he only went out to the beach to their usual spots, but since she wasn't there either he decided to go back, hoping she'd come home.

Tony spent hours pacing around their home, he didn't find her anywhere and she didn't reply to any of his calls; he felt like he'd die. He was so worried that he was just about to call the police when he heard their car pulling into the drive way.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews._

Even though over 24 hours passed since the event that got her so upset, Michelle still couldn't think straight. Driving home, she couldn't calm down, her mind still kept racing. She decided to do what was best for her husband even though she didn't know what that would be. Michelle was determined to do whatever it takes for him to be in peace again and to do whatever he says they should do, no matter where that would leave her.

At that moment Michelle didn't care about herself, all she cared about was her husband and his peace of mind.

Pulling into the driveway, tears came into her eyes when she saw their home; the very idea of it all disappearing made her feel horrible.

When Michelle got out of the car, she saw Tony standing at the door; the look on his face was mixture of complete fear and complete happiness.

She walked slowly towards him, not knowing what to do or say.

Tony just stood at the door, looking at her; he wanted to kill himself when he saw how miserable his wife was, but the happiness of her coming home and being okay made him forget, for a brief moment, about everything else.

Without thinking Tony rushed towards Michelle, picked her up in his arms and hugged her tightly, spinning her around.

Michelle didn't understand why he was acting that way at first, so she just hugged him back, not saying anything, being happy to feel his strong arms around her again.

Tony walked inside the house with Michelle still in his arms. Closing the door, he placed her down on the floor and started planting kisses all over her face. He kept saying "you're okay, you're home" between the kisses.

When Tony stopped kissing her, Michelle looked at him and when she saw how relieved he was that she's home said, "I feel awful about what happened. I needed some time before I could face you because I didn't know what would happen when we saw each other. I also wanted to give you some time away from me. I didn't even know if you wanted to see me after what you said last night or even have me around.

I know that after what happened we need to talk and sort things out, and who knows what will happen after that, but why would you think I wouldn't come home before we do or that I'm not okay?"

She placed her hand on his chest, "Tony, are you okay? What's going on? You're shaking."

"I'm… but…" Tony couldn't complete his sentences, he was too happy to see her in front of him and still completely shaken because of the fear he went through, so he just looked at her for a few seconds.

He covered her hand that was on his chest with his, squeezing it, wanting to feel that she was real.

"Of course I wanted to see you… I never wanted you to think… I'm such an idiot to let you think…" Tony squeezed her hand a bit tighter, Michelle squeezed his back.

Looking a bit calmer, even though his voice was still trembling a bit, he started talking.

"When I woke up this morning, I looked everywhere for you because I wanted to apologize and explain everything. When I didn't find you I thought you went to work already. Since I didn't want to bother you at work, I decided not to call you right away to explain myself. I just thought we'd talk during your lunch break. When you didn't call me I thought you had a lot of work to do. I also assumed that you were rightfully angry with me and that it was the reason why you didn't reply to my first message. Even though I was a bit worried already, I decided to wait until you came home, but you didn't come home.

I called you Michelle, I left tons of both text and voice messages. I called everywhere I could think of, I even called Division. When they told me you left hours ago, I thought I'd die. I couldn't reach you for hours after that still; I nearly lost my mind of worry."

Tony placed his hand on her cheek, "baby, I couldn't reach you or find you anywhere. The more time went by, the more I panicked. I even though I might never see you again because I had no idea what could've happened. You have no idea what went through my mind during all this time. I called all the hospitals worried that you had an accident or something. I was just about to call the police when I heard our car.

I know you're angry with me, you have every right to be, because I'm a jerk and I deserve it, but why didn't you reply to a single message I left? You didn't have to say much, just 'I'm okay' and I would've been the happiest man alive."

Tony hugged her tightly, "but it doesn't matter now, you're okay, nothing else matters, nothing else," with an obvious relief that she was back in his arms, he buried his face in her neck, still completely shaken.

She hugged him back as tightly; listening to him Michelle realized what she did to him when she left that phone off.

Even though the last thing on her mind was to hurt him or make him worry like this, Michelle felt guilty about not anticipating that this might happen. She also realized that none of the things he had said were true, just like she thought they weren't and for a moment she felt such a relief, but that was soon replaced by the guilt she was feeling about Tony's state. For a second she forgot everything else that was bothering her and all she wanted to do was explain to her husband, who was still holding her tightly, what happened and calm him down.

"Oh honey… I'm so sorry." Michelle caressed his hair trying to calm him down, "I didn't switch the phone on because I didn't expect you to call me. I didn't reply to any of your messages simply because I didn't get any of them. Look," she broke the hug only so much to be able to pull her phone out of the jacket pocket.

"See, it's off, it was off all day," placing it back in her pocket, Michelle hugged him tighter again, looking into his eyes.

"I'm not angry with you, I never was. I was just incredibly sad and worried about the whole thing that happened between us last night. I was so miserable that I couldn't concentrate on work, so I told Bill that I didn't feel well and I left early. I didn't come home because I didn't know what your reaction would be and I couldn't take it at that moment, so I found a bench in a park and sat there all this time.

I didn't switch the phone on because I didn't want to be called back to work and I wanted to be alone with my thoughts.

If I knew you'd call me, I would've answered for sure.

I would've come home hours ago if I knew that you wanted to see me or that you were looking for me; I just didn't expect you to.

I also left it off because I wanted to call you, hear your voice and see if you were okay.

I was so worried about you, but I thought that you didn't want to hear from me. I just thought you wanted me far away from you, so I stayed away from you, far longer than I wanted to and I kept that phone off to stop myself from calling you.

I wanted to come home and talk to you, have you hold me in your arms and tell me that everything would be okay. I wanted it so badly.

My heart was breaking while I was away from you, not knowing what was going on with you and now I see that you were as bad as I was. But I didn't know, I kept thinking I was doing what was best for you, thinking it was what you wanted," she said, stroking his back gently.

"You have no idea what guilt I feel right now for not anticipating that this might happen and because I didn't, I kept us apart and in pain for all this time.

I just thought I was doing the right thing that you needed to be away from me for a while before we talk. I didn't imagine for a second I'd do this to you and I feel horrible and so stupid right now that I didn't.

I'm so sorry for what I did to you Tony, I truly am. I didn't want to hurt you or scare you like this. That was the last thing on my mind. I'm so sorry honey, but I'm here now," Michelle said with a tiniest smile.

"There's no reason for you to be sorry or feel guilty about anything, none of this was your fault. I'm the one who's incredibly sorry for what happened last night. All the fear and anguish I felt while I didn't know where you were, I deserved it. You were as worried about me when you couldn't reach me while I was… and what you went through after you found me… and during all this time… It was all thanks to my stupidity," he looked straight into her eyes, with an obvious remorse on his face.

"I'm so very sorry that you had to go through all of this, sweetheart.

I never wanted to be far away from you and I never want to be again, not even for a second."

Tony kissed her passionately; even though none of their problems were solved Michelle kissed him back as passionately, completely lost in his kisses and his hug. For a moment all of their worries didn't seem to exist because they were together again.

When they stopped kissing, Tony leaned his forehead on hers, caressing her face, "let's sit down baby. We need to talk."

Michelle looked into his eyes clearly worried about what's coming, "Yeah, we do."

When they sat down, Tony took both her hands and kissed them, "It's going to be okay, but we have to clear it up first. First thing I want to say to you is that I love you with all my heart and nothing will ever change that. You are and you will always be my entire life."

"I love you as much Tony, nothing else matters to me, only you do. But…"

"No buts, we will get through this together. We just have to tell everything to each other now. It's time to clear it all up, without anything held back, like you wanted in the first place and I, like a jerk, tried to avoid it. Once we do, you'll see that we'll be okay," he smiled.

"I know we love each other, but all of the things that happened to us on that day, during the time you were in prison and during all these months while we held it all back… Maybe the fact that we love one another isn't enough; maybe all the problems will keep us apart. It might even be better that way," Michelle looked at him with eyes filled with tears.

"Do you want to be away from me?" Tony asked.

"No, no, never again; I don't want to spend another day without you. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. The time we were apart while you were in prison was more than enough," Michelle squeezed his hands tighter.

"But maybe we should be apart; if looking at me reminds you of everything that happened and is hurting you so much... The last thing I want is for you to suffer and if I'm the reason for all your suffering… even though it will break my heart, I will leave."

Swallowing hard, her eyes filled with tears even more, "I don't know how I'll handle it, but if it will make you feel better, I don't matter. I'll…"

Tony stopped her by kissing her, "the last thing I want is for you to leave.

I want you with me forever, nothing matters to me without you, nothing.

You're not the reason for all my suffering… I'm such an idiot to let you think that," he said.

"I am so sorry for the things I said last night. I know how much I hurt you and you have no idea how much I regret it. I didn't mean it and I never will, just like I didn't mean it when I pushed you away while I was in prison.

Sweetheart, I said what I said last night because I wanted to get you away from me until I sobered up, nothing more. I was too drunk to talk to you clearly and so ashamed of the state I was in. I hated myself because of it and I didn't want you to look at me while I was drunk like that. I'm so sorry that you ended up suffering because of my stupidity. That was the last thing I wanted," Tony said, kissing her hands.

"I know my love; I kind of knew it all along, just like I knew it last time. It still made me worry though, just like it did last time. Both times I knew you were hiding things from me, but what you were trying to hide scared me. After I heard those words for the second time…

I don't want to lose you, if there's any way for me too keep you, I'll take it," Michelle said looking into his eyes. "I want to keep you more than anything, if I can."

"I'm so stupid for ever hiding things from you and to think that what you didn't know couldn't hurt you. Hiding things from one another make us worry even more because we both know when we're doing it. We know each other too well and I should've known this from the start. I'm an idiot for not letting it all out right away like you wanted me to, or during these 6 months when it was obvious that you wanted to talk about it. But I wanted to shield you from everything bad, just like I thought I was doing back when I was in prison.

I didn't hide it from you because I didn't need you or want you around me, because I did so badly. I only did it because I couldn't bear seeing you suffer.

I kept hiding things from you because I kept thinking that I'm doing the right thing and sparing you all the grief, but it obviously didn't work out the way I planned.

I ended up hurting you even more by saying things I didn't mean and never will. I'm so very sorry for wording it the way I did, both times. I never meant it. While I was in prison I pushed you away from me because I was scared for your safety if you remained by my side. Even though it was breaking my heart, the idea of something bad happening to you was even worse. Last night I was so ashamed that you saw me like that and I just wanted to sober up before we talk. You have no idea how much I regret the things I said, but I didn't mean them; I really didn't, not a single one. I don't want to lose you either and I'll take any way to keep you too, because I want to keep you as much as you want to keep me. I'll do anything to stay with you. Please believe that baby," Tony kissed her hands again, Michelle smiled and nodded, "I believe you."

"I kept thinking I could handle it on my own because I thought you'd be better off even though you wanted to help me and I knew it. But I kept hoping I'd get the next job and then it would all be over and you'd never suffer again.

When I got rejected this last time it all spilled over, I couldn't take it anymore. Each rejection made me feel worse than last and made me drink a bit, but this last one pushed me over the edge, that's why I drank so much. I don't have a drinking problem; I swear to you, if I never see another beer again, I'd be a happy man.

I thought that drinking would help me forget my problems, but it didn't work and I'll never do it again. I feel like an idiot for even doing it. This last time, it didn't only make me feel worse but I managed to hurt you and that was the last thing I wanted. I swear to you honey, I'll never drink again or hurt you like this."

"I know honey, I know. But… what did you try to forget?" Michelle asked clearly worried what he would say, even though somehow she knew the answer.

"I tried to forget what a loser I am. Each rejection made me feel like I'm further away from ever getting the future we talked about. I felt like I'd ruin every chance of our business coming to life, of everything we dreamed about and I hated myself for it. I know how much you want it all and so do I, but I feel like I'll let us both down and mess everything up; it makes me feel so horrible. I didn't want you to suffer even more, but I managed to mess that up too and hurt you so much with words I didn't even mean. I'm so sorry, my love."

Tony leaned his head on her chest; Michelle hugged him tightly, kissing the top of his head.

"Oh baby, you don't have to be sorry about any of this," she gently lifted his head and looked into his eyes. "I know you never wanted to hurt me. I know you wanted to protect me; I never doubted that. The thing that kept making me worried, and still worries me is…

I know you love me and I know you want me with you as much as I want you with me. But if I remind you of what happened, if it will keep bothering you for as long as we're together, for the rest of our lives… I couldn't live with that. Maybe you need to be away from me to put your life together, without me being a constant reminder of what you did. I don't want to be the thing that hurts you, not even a bit, let alone this much. It's the last thing I want and maybe…," she said on verge of crying.

"Shhhh…" Tony kissed her tears away, "you don't remind me of what I did in a bad way. You remind me of what I had with you before that day, and what I got back when I came out of the prison. You remind me of the only good thing in my entire life, the only thing I never want to lose. I'm not ashamed of what I did or sorry because I did it, I never was and I never will be. You're not the reason why I can't put my life back on track; you're the only reason why I want to do it. Without you nothing would make sense, not a single thing.

The only question is… do you want to be with me, no matter what the future brings us? Do you want to be with a guy who is a traitor in most people's eyes anyway, who will probably disappoint you even more in the future? Besides, I doubt I'll ever get a good job and I'll probably ruin half the things we planned and…" he paused, looking at her with eyes filled with tears.

"Oh honey, you know I want to. I already told you 6 months ago what I think about all of this, but I'll repeat some of it again. So, like I already told you, I don't consider you to be a traitor, I never have and I never will. You already know how I feel about what you did on that day and there's no reason for me to repeat it again because I still mean every word I said 6 months ago.

However, I want to tell you something I never want to hear again, I don't like hearing that word in any content when it concerns you. I never want you to say it again when you talk about yourself. So don't do it," she kissed him, Tony smiled a bit.

"I'm not disappointed in you, I never was and I never will be, no matter what happens. I don't care what you do, or what anyone thinks of you, because they're all morons if they don't see what an incredible man you are and how lucky they'd be to have you. They can all suck air for all I care.

I love you; you're my husband and no matter what happens, you will always be my whole life and I'll always be proud of you. I don't care what we do because I know we'll be okay, as long as we're together and we both obviously want to be together forever," Michelle smiled for a second, as did Tony.

"What also scared me a lot during all this time was the fact that you were so depressed. You didn't want to let me in on anything that was going on, you kept trying to protect me by hiding your problems from me and all I wanted was to help you. When you shut me out like that, I thought you were fighting with yourself. I know you love me, I always knew that, but I kept being afraid that there was some truth in those words. Even though you never said it, I always thought that even though you loved me so much, part of you blamed me for everything that happened. And believe me, I blame myself enough already. I still didn't get over that day, that hotel; I still have nightmares about it. I wanted to talk to you about it all, but I couldn't burden you with more problems. I kept blaming myself for it all, constantly being afraid I'd lose you and I kept thinking that all of it was my fault. I still do," her eyes filled with tears again.

"Baby, how can it all possibly be your fault, huh? What do I have to blame you for? Did you plant the virus in that hotel? Did you want to be abducted by that maniac?

No, all you did was your job and the rest of it was an unfortunate chain of events. I don't blame you for anything; the thought never even crossed my mind. None of it, listen to me, none of it was your fault. I don't ever want you to think that it was, because it wasn't. It wasn't either of our faults. It's just the way it was supposed to happen and that's it," he said, caressing her face.

"But it is my fault. Instead of staying outside the hotel, I went in. Even though you told me not to do it until the suits arrive, I went in there anyway. Thanks to that all of our agents died, I got abducted and you ended up in prison. I had to look at Gael dying; I had to look at all of them dying. I still see them all when I close my eyes and it's my entire fault. No one else's but mine. I'm the one who took them in there and I survived when I should've died with them, that way at least you wouldn't be in this situation. I ruined everything, including your life and your career," Michelle started crying, burying her face in his chest.

"Oh baby, how can you think like that? You made the right choice; the only choice you could've made, all of us would've chosen it. You couldn't stay outside waiting for those suits while that idiot was inside, you couldn't let him get away.

I've never blamed you for any of it, no one did; they all went in there with you willingly and by doing so you all saved countless lives because without you going in there Alvers would've escaped and we never would've gotten an ID on Saunders. Who knows how many more would've been infected had we not stopped him?"

Tony lifted her head with his hands, cupping her face; he wiped her tears with his thumbs.

"And what did I tell you about saying things like that, about saying that you should've died, huh?

You have no idea what I went through on that day. While you were in that hotel and I thought I'd lose you, not knowing if you were infected, I was going out of my mind. I hated myself for the way I treated you that day, thinking our last face to face conversation would be some stupid fight that I started.

I wanted to kill myself for the way I acted and for the way I talked to you. I thought I'd never have a chance to tell you how sorry I was for it all. I kept thinking how much I loved you and how much I wanted you back. I was sure I'd die if something happened to you, because without you I had no reason to live and there was nothing I could've done to save you. You have no idea how relieved I was when you told me that you'd be okay. Then that maniac took you from me, and the only thing that went through my mind was that this time I can do something about getting you back and I did it. No other option existed; I only wanted to save you and hold you in my arms again. I couldn't let them hurt you in front of my eyes and torture you, not when I was able to get you out of there. I don't regret it and I never will. I cursed my faith so many times while I was in prison. I cursed that day for ever happening like that. I cursed the fact that I lost you because I was sure I'd never see you again. I felt like I'd die without you in that hellhole. Your visits were the only thing that made me happy. Even though my heart broke when I pushed you away to protect you, knowing that you're safe and alive out there was the only thing that kept me going in there.

I never regretted what I did, because it was the only right choice and I'll never regret it.

And I don't want you too feel any kind of guilt about it," he said. Michelle just looked at him lovingly.

"You know very well that I can't live without you. You're right, if you died in that hotel I wouldn't be in this situation, because I'd be dead too and if you died when they abducted you and I could've saved you, I would've died again.

If I had to go on without you, I would've died of broken heart either way. So don't you ever say that again or think like that. Nothing, listen to me, nothing in this world matters to me if I don't have you by my side. You are my life and living without you has no purpose for me. I don't want you to blame yourself for any of it because it's not your fault," Tony said, kissing her.

"I couldn't go on without you either," Michelle replied. "I love you so much."

"I love you too baby," Tony leaned her head back on his chest and hugged her tightly, calming her down.

"I hate that you suffered so much on your own about all of this.

By hiding my problems from you, I forced you to hide yours from me. You didn't want to burden me even more and you needed me so much, as much I needed you, even more. You suffered so much while I was in prison and I, an idiot, instead of allowing us both to let it all out as soon as possible thought that it might be better to wait for the things to move in a more positive direction for us before we go into it all. And it was the first and the most important thing that needed to be sorted out. I'm such a jerk for letting you suffer about that hotel and about everything, thinking it would be easier to face it once our life is on track again. I'm such an idiot. We could've handled it months ago; with each others help like you wanted us to in the first place, like we'll do now. I would've spared you so much grief and today never would've happened. I knew it all still bothered you but when I would see you so worried, I wanted to make you happy in that moment, by taking you out for a walk, making you dinner or making you happy in any way I could, so you smile more and are as happy as possible. All I wanted to do was make you forget about all our problems and focus on the good things and not think about bad ones that would make you even more miserable. I couldn't look at you like that and I wanted to make you happy.

I though the time would come for that when our life is back on track, but the problems were there and they kept getting bigger by being kept inside.

I'm such an idiot and you have no idea how much I regret it, baby, I'll never stop blaming myself for the way things went. This all should've been solved by now and you would've been far happier during all these months and especially today.

But I promise you honey, we'll sort it all out, we'll take it slowly, step by step and we'll make it. By the time your last day at Division comes we'll be okay, I promise. That is if you still want to leave Division, I wouldn't blame you if you don't thanks to the way I acted," he said.

Michelle lifted her head from his chest and looked into his eyes. Kissing him she said, "I do want to leave Division, the sooner the better. Nothing we planed 6 months ago changed. I think I'll be leaving it just like we planned, 3 months from now. I know we'll handle it all, the main things we explained; the rest will be easier. We'll talk about it slowly, one step at a time and we'll be fine," she smiled.

"And another thing, don't call yourself an idiot, okay? I don't think that you are. You did what you thought was right thing to do. You wanted to make me as happy as I could be under the circumstances and you did it, I was happy. Problems were there true, nightmares also, but each time you tried to make me happy it worked and I was. The last months have been amazing, despite all the problems, thanks to you. It's true that I would've been happier if we handled it all sooner, but not because I wasn't happy, but because I didn't want you to suffer. I could see how much you were suffering and it made me suffer even more than thanks to my own problems. I never want to see you suffer again. I don't care what we'll do in the future, that's the last thing I care about right now. I'll be happy one way or the other because I'll have you with me and we'll be happy no matter what we do as long as we're together. I love you so much."

"I love you too honey, so much," Tony replied. "What you just said to me was the first thing I wanted to say to you this morning when I woke up and realized what I did. Maybe it won't go the way we planned it 6 months ago, but I'm sure whatever we end up doing will be as good. I don't care if I remain a cook for the rest of my life. If I have you with me, whatever I do won't matter because I'll be the happiest and luckiest man alive."

They hugged each other tightly.

"Cook?" Michelle asked.

"Damn, I wanted it to be a surprise. Oh well, I was going to tell you in the morning, if all went well, anyway. Now don't let this one shock you, I think it's a good idea. Here it goes," Tony smiled.

"When I couldn't find you this morning, I started thinking about myself and about my current life and I realized I'd be much happier if I'm not inside the house as much while you're at work. So I figured I should find something to do, anything for start. And the only thing that kept coming into my mind was the offer I didn't tell you about that Gianni made on that night we talked about having a baby. I wanted to tell you that night, but when you mentioned our child it totally slipped my mind and it didn't come up later. He told me that if I wanted to, I could come and work for him until I find something better to do and help him train some people, because he needs help around the diner; while I'm looking for something else, of course.

Back then I said I'd think about it and this morning I thought to myself, why not? No one else wants me, at least for now, and I couldn't find a better boss even if I looked for one. I can have fun with Gianni, stay out of the house while you're not there and still manage to talk to you on your break, be home when you come back from work and everything. This way I'll feel more useful and I'll be far happier. Even if I don't manage to find something else, Gianni and I can work in cooking business and you and Gina can help us. Though you'll be the brain of the operation, we wouldn't want you in the kitchen," Tony grinned.

Michelle laughed and slapped him lightly on the chest, "sounds like a great plan. I'm so happy that you decided to do something like this; I think it will help you a lot. I doubt it will be for long though, I'm sure we'll do something together. Something that will be ours, made from scratch by the two of us, some small business of our own, a computer store or something similar, like we talked about. Though I won't mind working with Gianni and Gina either, so I'll be happy both ways. Since I doubt I'll have too much to do if we remain with them, I'll have plenty of time to be with our kids and that's something I'm also looking forward to," she smiled looking into his eyes.

On that, Tony kissed her passionately, "you're the most perfect woman in the world; I love you so much. I still can't believe how lucky I am to have you."

"I love you to baby, you're as perfect and I feel so lucky to have you too," Michelle replied and they kissed for a while.

"Listen, I think we've had just about enough misery for one day. I truly can't talk about anything concerning that day and that time anymore for today anyway. Don't worry; I know there's more of it left, we'll clear more things tomorrow. We cleared the main issues for now; those were the most important ones and they needed to be cleared right away. Those that remained aren't that big although they're still important. We handled those that concern our relationship and nothing that's left can separate us anymore. We'll take care of the others slowly, step by step, though I want them out of the way too. I don't want to see that pretty head of yours worried anymore."

"I don't want us to worry about anything anymore either, though I doubt it will be so easy to clear some of it. I think some of it will haunt us for a long time, like that hotel will haunt me," Michelle said with a bit gloomier look again.

"I know sweetheart, I know, but this time I'll be here each time it haunts you and we'll talk about it and I'll keep you in my arms until you feel better. Come here," Michelle climbed in his lap and Tony hugged her tightly.

"I'll always be here for you from now on; I'll help you take care of your nightmares just like you'll help me with mine. We won't hide anything that bothers us anymore, just like we didn't hide it during those 3 years. I need you as much as you need me to solve my problems and I promise, from now on I won't hide them from you. I'll tell you everything. It took me longer than it should've but I finally realized that I'm hurting you more by hiding things from you then by letting them out, no matter how painful they might be. I know that you wanted to tell me all your problems and because of the way I handled this whole situation, you didn't. You suffered so badly thanks to me and I feel terrible about it, but I won't be hiding anything anymore."

"Baby, you don't have to apologize anymore; I know you did it with best intentions. Stop feeling so bad. I did suffer, but so did you. Don't worry about me; all my suffering seems like nothing right now since I get to keep you. We'll be okay as long as we're together and this time nothing will keep us apart." She kissed him soundly on the cheek and hugged him tightly.

"I'm so happy I get to keep you too; I still can't believe it. This time nothing will mess up our full happiness," Tony replied hugging her back happily.

"Honey, did you eat anything during all this time?"

"I ate a donut when I got to that park, nothing else. I couldn't eat anything else; I had to force myself to eat that much. What about you?"

"I ate something when I woke up, but I couldn't eat much either. Are you hungry? I know I am."

"When you ask me now, I am. I really am."

"Yeah, I thought so. We should eat something and then I think we both need a rest."

"We do, I feel like I didn't sleep for five days, but I want to eat something first."

"Since it's this hour, I think we should eat something light and we'll have a bigger meal when we wake up."

"Sounds great," Michelle smiled. "I better set the alarm clock."

"Alarm clock? Honey, it's almost 4 in the morning, you have to be up in little over 2 hours. I totally forgot that you have to go to work tomorrow. I wanted to clear everything as fast as possible that I didn't even think how long we were talking. You'll be exhausted."

"Don't worry about me; I wanted to clear it all as much as you did. I don't care how exhausted I'll be, I'm just happy we got these things out of the way. Nothing else matters more than that. Besides, when I wanted to leave early today and yesterday, I told Bill I didn't feel well, so he told me I could come a bit later or not at all if I didn't feel well. I'll just set it so I sleep for a few hours and if I don't feel like going, I'll just tell him I don't feel well and we can spend the entire day in bed," Michelle winked and kissed him.

"Perfect idea," Tony smiled.

"Yeah, I think I'll do just that," Michelle replied happily. "They can always call me in if they need me for some emergency."

"I hope they don't," Tony looked a bit worried again.

"I'm sure they won't honey, don't worry," Michelle replied, kissing the top of his nose.

"Yeah, everything will be okay; I just worry about you all the time. I can't help it," he rubbed his nose against hers. "I love you too much."

"I love you too baby," Michelle replied, caressing his face.

"Come on, let's eat and go to bed."

They got up and went to the kitchen. When Tony got all the ingredients out, Michelle hugged him from behind and leaned her head on his back, not wanting to leave him for a second; she couldn't believe how good things turned out. It seemed like it would all fall apart just a few short hours ago, but now it seemed like nothing happened. She'd keep her husband and her main nightmare was lifted from her shoulders. Nothing could separate them anymore and Michelle couldn't be happier about it. Tony was thinking the same way as her and was as happy.

They ate happily, smiling to each other constantly. When they finished their meal, they went to bed.

Tony spooned Michelle and kissed her neck, hugging her tightly, pulling her as close to him as possible.

"Don't let me go, okay?" Michelle said, looking at him.

"I don't think I could spend another night without you holding me in your arms or just feeling you close to me; hearing you breathe. When you're not here with me, it brings back bad memories, memories I don't want to relive alone ever again." She bit her lower lip, not wanting to go back to all of it already.

"Oh honey…" Tony hugged her even tighter, kissing her cheek. "I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that alone again, I really am. I'm sorry for the mess I caused us, but it won't happen again. From now on, we'll discuss and handle together all the remaining things and anything new that might come up. I won't hide anything from you ever again or behave the way I did."

"Good, because I don't think I can handle anything like this again, I really don't," Michelle said.

"You won't have to sweetheart, nothing like this will ever happen to us again.

And don't worry about me going anywhere; I won't be leaving you ever again. I'll be right here when you wake up, I promise. Each time for the rest of our lives," Tony replied, kissing her neck again. "Just promise me you'll be here too."

"I promise. I'm not going anywhere," she said happily, kissing him. "I'll be here too, for the rest of our lives. I love you my wonderful husband."

"I love you too my wonderful wife," Tony smiled. "Good night."

"Good night."

A few minutes later, they both fell asleep peacefully.


	10. Chapter 10

**Author note:** _Thanks for all the reviews._

Four hours later Tony rolled over in their bed and found her side empty. The first thing that came to his mind was that she's gone, that something bad happened to her and that last night was a dream.

Tony sat up on the bed in a panic, turning around looking for her. He felt such a relief when he saw her standing by the sliding glass door that leads out to their back porch and beach, looking at the ocean and talking on the phone.

Michelle turned around and saw him sitting on the bed still half panicked. Without hanging up the phone, she rushed over to him and sat down on the bed. Worried, she caressed his face and smiled to him, making sure that he was alright.

Tony smiled back and without saying anything pulled her into his arms. Michelle leaned her head on his chest and he wrapped his arms around her, kissing her hair. Caressing his arm with her free hand she continued the conversation with her boss.

"Thank you Bill… I'm sure I'll feel better in a few days… It must be some virus Tony and I caught somewhere… Yeah, thanks I'll tell him… Don't hesitate to call me if you need me for something, I'll come right away if you do… Thanks Bill, see you on Monday… Bye."

Michelle hung up the phone and placed it on the nightstand.

Looking into his eyes she asked, "You okay? You looked like you had a nightmare or felt bad or something."

"I'm fine sweetheart, with you in my arms I'm great," Tony smiled. "I just rolled over on your side of the bed and you weren't there. It made me panic. For a second I thought none of the events from last night happened and that you were gone. I almost had a heart attack. I felt better the moment I saw you. You have no idea how relived I was when I realized that you're here and that everything is okay," he said, kissing her gently.

"I'm right here honey and I'm not going anywhere. Everything is fine," Michelle said, caressing his face. "I'm sorry I left you alone, but I had to talk to Bill and I didn't want to wake you up. I only moved away until I finished my conversation with him, but I'm back in your arms now," she smiled.

"Good," Tony replied happily.

"I wouldn't normally react like this, but after everything that happened to us… I don't want to lose you."

"I know honey, I know. I would probably react the same way if I woke up without you next to me, especially after all this hell we've been through."

Michelle kissed him gently on the lips and leaned her head back on his chest closing her eyes.

"Did I hear you say, 'See you on Monday'?" he asked, playing with her curls.

"Yeah, I told him we didn't feel well and that I'd like to stay home if they didn't need me. When I called him I only wanted to stay home today, but then he told me that there's nothing much to do at the moment. He said that I can stay until Monday, if we didn't feel well, and I couldn't pass the opportunity to spend a few days alone with you," she said looking into his eyes and smiled. "I can't believe I lied to him."

"It's just a tiny lie and it made your husband very, very happy," Tony replied, gently leaning her down on the bed.

He remained on top of her, smiling; he kissed her passionately a few times, gently caressing her all over. Michelle looked up at him lovingly, gently stroking his face and back.

"I love you so much. I'm so glad we finally worked things out. I can't believe it all turned out so well; I'm so happy it did."

"So am I sweetheart, so am I," Tony replied. "I love you too, so much."

They remained like that for a while, kissing and caressing, gazing into one another's eyes happily.

"You should sleep some more honey, we both should. Four hours isn't nearly enough sleep for either of us," Tony said.

"Okay, if you promise me we'll pick up right here when we wake up," Michelle replied.

"You have my word," Tony grinned. "Come here." He lay on his back and Michelle curled up next to him, leaning her head on his chest, covering them both.

"See you in a bit," Michelle smiled.

"See you baby," he replied, kissing her hair.

They both immediately fell into a peaceful sleep.

Six hours later Michelle was laying on top of Tony with her head on his chest.

He gently caressed her back and she kissed his chest every now and then.

"Are you hungry?"

Michelle lifted her head and smiled, "yeah, I really am, thanks to you."

Tony gently rolled them onto their side without breaking their hug.

"Well, what can I do? You told me to promise you we'd pick up where we left off before we fell asleep and we did. You know perfectly well that I can never have enough of you," he said happily, kissing her neck.

"You sure kept your promise," Michelle giggled. "You're pretty hard to resist yourself."

"Seriously, I think we should both eat. We hardly had anything yesterday. I don't want you to get weak; you know you have poor iron."

"Oh honey, it's only one day of less food, I'll be fine," she smiled.

"I know, but still, you need to eat well. I couldn't take care of you during all those months we were apart, but now I'll make damn sure you eat well and stay healthy," Tony replied, kissing the top of her nose. "I love you too much to let anything bad happen to you."

"You don't stop worrying about me and taking care of me. You're so amazing; I'm so lucky to have you."

"I'm the lucky one. You're my life; I'll worry about you and take care of you every day for as long as I live."

"I will too, and you're right honey; we should eat. I'm actually starving and I'm sure you are too."

"Yeah, I am. I can make us couple of smoothies for now. I'll think of something solid we can eat with those so it holds us until lunch."

"Sounds great, let's go," she said without letting him go and looking deeply into his eyes, "I love you so much."

"I love you too sweetheart, so much," he replied, kissing her gently. "Now, let's go."

"Let's go," she smiled.

They got up, dressed, and went into the kitchen. Tony got milk and bananas and started making the smoothies. Placing the ingredients in the blender, he started mixing them. Michelle sat on the bar stool looking at him.

Tony opened the fridge, "we have two pastries I bought yesterday morning. We can eat them with these; it should be enough for now. What do you think?"

"Good idea," Michelle replied.

Tony placed the pastries on the counter; leaning over it he kissed her and went back to their smoothies.

"So what do you want to do today? I know we're sick," he turned around and grinned, causing Michelle to giggle. "I think we should go outside a bit. It's a beautiful day," Tony said, filling two glasses.

"Yeah, it is, especially because I get to spend it with you," she replied.

Tony turned around and smiled; he took the glasses and placed them on the counter. He then went around and hugged Michelle, "I couldn't agree with you more. I don't care what we'll do, as long as we spend the entire day together."

"Neither do I," Michelle smiled. "But since it's nice and sunny we could go eat on the back porch."

"Great idea."

They picked up their smoothies and pastries from the counter and went on their back porch. Placing their food on the wooden table next to the deckchair, they sat down and snuggled close to each other. Tony handed Michelle her food and they ate in peace, flirting and kissing, having a great time together. When they finished their meal, Michelle leaned her head on Tony's chest and he hugged her tightly.

"I love it out here. I missed coming here with you all those months while you were away from me," Michelle said, snuggling even closer next to him. "I couldn't even look outside, let alone sit in this chair by myself. Even though being out here would only bring happy memories, it all hurt too much. I avoided anything I could, even though I couldn't avoid being inside our house and surrounded with our things. It helped me in one way to be surrounded with it all, but it hurt me so much in the other."

"Oh baby, I can only imagine how horrible all those months were for you, being alone here. But I'm here from now on and I'm not going anywhere."

"I know and I'm so happy about it. Those months were the worst time of my life. Especially because I knew that you were going through hell on your own and I wasn't able to be there for you. It was killing me. My own misery about that day was ten times worse because you weren't here. I can only imagine how badly you must've felt and what you went through all alone and in there. The scar on your chest proves it and I know you hid so much from me to protect me," Michelle said, leaning her head on his chest. "I'm so glad you came home to me safely; I don't know what I would do without you."

"It was horrible, but nothing hurt me as bad as when I pushed you away. It was for your safety; I'd do it again if I had to without thinking twice about it; but being away from you was killing me far more than anything that was happening to me in that prison. Even though the idea of you out there alive and safe was helping me to keep going, I missed you so much that I thought I'd die without you," Tony said, kissing her hair.

"I'll make sure nothing comes between us again. I know neither of us could survive that again. We'll fix everything and move away from our old careers as far as we can get. I'll move us to a different continent if I have to, to keep you safe."

Michelle looked at him and smiled, "I doubt it will be necessary, but if it comes to that I'll go anywhere with you. I don't care where, just as long as we're together."

"Tony?" she paused, biting her bottom lip.

"What is it honey?"

"Why did that guy stab you? You never really told me much about your time in there. Only the stuff you told me when I saw the scar for the first time and nothing else. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"I'll tell you honey, but it has nothing to do with us. I kept avoiding it because I knew it would upset you, but I suppose time has come for me to tell you," he smiled, gently kissing her forehead.

"Here it goes. Life in there is hard. They all have gangs who move around drugs as well as hurt each other and people outside. Crime in there is as bad as it is out here, maybe even worse. Plus like I already told you, a lot of them hated me for being an ex-federal agent and others for being a traitor, some for both. I was scared for my life constantly even though I stayed away from them."

Michelle looked at him obviously scared of the idea what could've happened because she knew quite well, thanks to her job, how life in there was.

Tony caressed her face, "while Mike was around, I was fine. It was mostly like a life in a solitary but I was okay with it. Mike is a great guy; we would talk about our families and we'd joke around. You would come to visit me, and so would Jack. It wasn't life like I was used to, far from it, but I was okay. Then everything changed in a heartbeat, new prison administration, Mike got sick… I lost everything in a minute. But nothing hurt me more than the moment I realized I'd have to push you away to keep you safe. Those guys threatened me before; they would say I'd soon lose my babysitter and they'd get their hands on me and my pretty wife when I do. I was already scared for you more than you can imagine, but both Mike and Jack assured me that they couldn't get to you so easily and that you'd be safe. Jack took care of you outside and Mike made sure no inmate saw you when you visited me, so even though I was still scared for you I was calmer thanks to that. However, when the prison's administration changed, I knew they wouldn't let me keep my special treatment and that it would all put you in danger. Mike told them that he didn't mind taking care of me and they let him do it even though it wasn't same as before. He couldn't watch over me all the time and then the new warden told me that our private room was a privilege I didn't deserve and would soon be taking it away. If I wanted to see you, I'd have to do it the same way as everyone else, in the public room. Because, as you know, no private visits of any kind were allowed over there. I wish they were because then I'd have told you to come only during my time, but they didn't allow it. You'd have had to come in the public room and I couldn't let that happen. Other prisoners knew I was married, but none of them knew how you looked or who you were. I came to the prison charged with treason without anyone really explaining why. No one also told them that you were a federal agent as well and I was happy about it. Less they knew about you, happier I was. I was surprised none of the guards that hated me never told them anything, but they didn't, which kept you safe even more. I guess that was all thanks to Mike. If they saw you, recognized you and knew that you were a federal agent too… who knows what could've happened to you, and I couldn't allow that," he said, kissing her hair; Michelle caressed his face.

"Fortunately my separated cell never came on the list of privileges I lost. Even though Mike was on sick leave already, they allowed me to have the room for our visits for a little while longer, but Harry, my new guard, didn't like me. He didn't want to be my 24/7 "babysitter" and told them he wouldn't do it. Instead he only watched me for a few hours a day. I wish he hadn't," Tony rolled his eyes. "He was a moron; I just wish they kept him away from me as much as possible. I won't talk about him now, I'll tell you about him some other time. Or not, since he's not worth it. But we'll see," he smiled to her, she smiled back.

"Anyway, the new administration didn't feel like sparing more men on me so they dumped me in the yard with everyone else during the day and that's when the problems started. When they all saw me in the general areas at the regular time, they started doing all kinds of things to me, calling me names, kicking me around. Some hated me; some wanted me in their gang… all I wanted was to stay as far away from them all as possible and I let them all know that. My actions made them wonder why, so they had even more reasons to hate me, more reasons to hurt me, more reasons to kill me. I was scared for my life constantly and for you even more…" Tony looked at Michelle and saw the scared look on her face; he smiled and kissed her.

"I don't want to upset you even more, so I'll spare you the nasty details. To make a long story short I kept you with me for as long as I could've, I didn't want to lose you. The idea of pushing you away was tearing me apart. However, I knew I had to do it because the longer time I spent with them, the more danger you were in and I only had a few private visits left. So I decided to make our final visit as enjoyable as the others were, because believe me, your visits made the time without you far more bearable. The only thing that made me want to get up in the morning was the idea of seeing your beautiful face again soon," Tony caressed her face.

"And then after that visit I decided, no matter how much I didn't want to do it, no matter how much it hurt me, to push you away, so I could protect you as much as possible. But two days before our final visit was supposed to happen, I was in the gym exercising and three guys, who belonged to a gang that wanted me to join them and I refused, showed up. They came to me and told me they'd make me join them. I told them I wouldn't do it. One yanked out a knife, two others only fists; they said they'd leave me alone if I can fight them off. We started fighting and I managed to keep them away from me for a long time, but then the guy with the knife came at me. Even though I managed to keep him away, he stabbed me after a while because the other two joined in again."

Michelle shivered at the thought of what might've happened, she hugged him even tighter, kissing his chest, "but where the hell were those guards?"

Tony kissed her hair, "they didn't really care what would happen to me. They took their time to come. When they came, they realized I was hurt and took me to the infirmary. I decided to push you away before our visit because I didn't want you to know what happened to me. I didn't want you to worry about me even more especially because I had to push you away anyway, so I wanted to spare you at least that one worry. After I pushed you away, Mike came back for a while and he remained with me, taking care of me again. That's why I paused when you told me about Seattle, because I wanted you back more than anything. I missed you so badly. You don't know what I would've given to hold you one more time," he said hugging her tightly, "but I couldn't do it. I didn't know when Mike would leave again and your safety was more important than anything else. He was quite sick and he left only a few weeks after you went to Seattle. I wanted you to come to me while he was there, but since I didn't know how long it would last, I didn't tell you to come. I couldn't push you away twice, because the first time nearly killed me and if I got you back, I never would've let you go and you would've been in danger."

Michelle could feel she was getting more and more upset, but she didn't say anything; she just let him talk more, trying to calm herself down.

"I couldn't let anything happen to you; I was in danger daily and if you were next to me, you would've been too. I couldn't let that happen, not if I could protect you somehow. This way you thought I was doing better and I thought you'd be safer in Seattle, far away from me. That's why I told you to go, I wanted you to think that I was okay so you wouldn't worry about me more than you were already worried. I knew you felt bad about the whole situation and I knew you were already blaming yourself enough. I didn't want you to feel guilty about what was happening to me in there, because it wasn't your fault."

Michelle's eyes were filled with tears. Even though she didn't want to get so upset; the idea of what her husband went through upset her more than she wanted.

"Even though I still feel guilty about all kinds of things that happened on that day, I know none of it is my fault, thanks to your assuring words from yesterday, but I just can't…" she took a deep breath.

"When I hear about what you went through, I feel… and I can't… each time you were hurt, I wasn't there to make you feel better. I love you more than my life and I hate this whole situation that had to happen to us. I hate that they took you away from me… I hate them for putting you in that place… I hate that you had to go through this… I hate that you were in such a danger…" she bit her lower lip and sat up visibly upset; her eyes filled with tears even more.

"I keep coming so close to losing you. Something keeps happening and I'm so tired of it all and so scared of losing you somehow. I just want to live with you in peace and have a normal life and I'm scared it will never happen… I don't want to lose you."

Tony cupped her face and kissed her.

"Shhh," he gently leaned her head back on his chest, hugging her tightly. "You won't lose me. Everything is okay sweetheart, nothing will separate us anymore, nothing," he said, gently caressing her back, calming her down. "It was a tough time, but it is over. We're together and we will be forever. That's all that matters."

"Yeah," Michelle replied, "nothing else matters."

"Don't worry baby, we'll live in peace, far away from it all. We're already further away and closer to it every day. It will come before you know it; you'll see. We just have to wait a bit longer and I'm sure everything will be okay. We'll have our life the way we want it soon," he lifted her head from his chest and looked into her eyes, assuring her of his words. "It will happen."

"I really hope so," Michelle said. "I'll let Bill know next week that I'm planning to resign from Division in 3 months. He can start looking for my replacement right away, so noting can delay my leaving. And if he finds someone even sooner, that's even better. I'll leave right away."

"Good idea."

They held each other in silence for quite some time.

"You keep saying I had a hard time during all of that, what about you?

You were on your own with all the nightmares from that hotel… You had no one to really talk to either. I know you wanted to talk to me about it all, just like I wanted to talk to you, but neither of us could've burden the other with even more things and you kept it all bottled up. You only told me a little, but I could tell how much you suffered. I see it in your eyes each time you remember it and even when you don't, the pain is there. You should tell me about it too, just like I told you. It would help."

Michelle looked at him, "Yeah, I was suffering badly. The time without you was the worst time of my life and the fact that it came after a day like that one made it even worse. My each day seemed like a year. Each was same; I lived from one visit to another. The rest of the time I spent mostly crying. I was so depressed. I couldn't sleep; I couldn't eat, no matter how much you wanted me to. I'm a strong person; you of all people know that the best, but I couldn't be myself. I could barely recognize myself; I couldn't find my strength. Gina made me eat, and she made sure I ate daily, but I had no idea what I was eating. I felt like I had no reason to eat, to get up or do anything else. I only ate to make you feel better. The thought of you would get me going and the little strength I had was thanks to you. I would get up each morning saying to myself that you wouldn't want me to act like that.

Working helped me a bit too, no matter how much I hate that place, it at least cut my days short and it made me feel like the time to go to you would come sooner.

Each night I went to bed I had hard time falling asleep, afraid of the nightmares I knew I'd have and of waking up alone with only them as my company. I would clutch your pillow and breathe your scents in, making you closer to me somehow. It was the only thing that would help me fall asleep for a few hours. I walked around the house in your clothes because they had your scents and made me feel closer to you. I kept looking at our pictures thinking of the wonderful three years we spent together. They were my happy place; each time I would get upset, I would close my eyes and pick a day. Each day I spent with you during those years was a happy one and each of them made me feel better. I missed all the little things we did, all the little things I was used to. Being without you made me feel so alone, so incomplete and thinking about them was the only thing that made me feel at peace a bit," she said.

"I went back to those days too; they were in my mind 24/7. When they brought me to jail, I asked them if I could take a picture from my wallet with me and they allowed it. It's that tiny picture of the two of us from one of our picnics. I kept it in my wallet all the time and I placed it back there when I got my things back when I was getting out."

"It's that picture we took on the first picnic we went on after we got married," she smiled. "I have same one in my wallet."

"Yeah," he smiled back, "the first of our many amazing picnics as a married couple. I kept looking at it, looking at your smile and each time I did, I knew my choice from that day was the right one," he said, caressing her face. "I love you."

"I love you too baby, so much," Michelle replied, kissing him. They remained quiet for a few minutes; holding each other tightly.

Michelle soon continued, "I had so many bad things on my mind and I couldn't find any peace. You were on my mind constantly, what you were going through. I wanted to find a way to get you out, but there was nothing I could do but wait and hope Jack would find a way. It frustrated me so much. When you pushed me away, other ideas came to my mind too and they were killing me. There's no reason to bring them up since we talked about it all," Michelle smiled, showing him that she doesn't feel that way anymore.

Tony replied by kissing the top of her nose.

"Then I went to Seattle. I was even more alone and miserable over there. You see, being here was good and bad at the same time. While it reminded me of what we had, it also reminded me of what we lost and that was the double edged sword. I wanted to leave at first; I couldn't stand being here anymore, but even though being away from our home helped me a bit, I couldn't wait to go back. No matter how much it hurt being here alone, I missed being away from it all even more and I missed being closer to you even though you pushed me away. I missed being close to everything that represented our old life together. That's the only thing that mattered and still matters to me and being away from it all didn't feel right," she said, Tony took her hand and kissed it.

"I didn't know anyone in Seattle and couldn't allow myself to get too friendly with anyone. I really didn't have any friends and I just couldn't care if I did or not. I preferred it that way. I already told you all about Bill; he was the only person would could have been considered a friend and was my mentor. He was someone to talk to and share misery with during working hours. I ignored him outside work though, just like I ignored everyone else. Aside from work, the rest of the day I would spend alone. I couldn't stand being around anyone.

No matter how much I missed being around people, talking to them, I couldn't bring myself to socialize with anyone I didn't have to socialize with, so I just shut all of them out. I talked to Jack a few times on the phone. Gina and Gianni called me too from time to time. I didn't even feel like talking to any of them, but I did because I knew they'd tell you about me, so I wanted them to think I was okay. I also asked them about you. I missed you so much, but they didn't tell me anything special and it frustrated me. I knew things weren't the way they were telling me and I couldn't help you or be with you. And that's all I wanted; all I wanted was you and to be back in your arms. I needed your calming words because my nightmares kept coming back and only you know how to make them go away. I needed your warm body next to mine at night. I needed all the little things we did together that I had gotten so used to. I needed to be with you to stop feeling so alone. I needed you so much and it was the only thing I couldn't have," Michelle said, squeezing his hand.

"Oh honey, I'm here now; you're not alone and you'll never be again," Tony hugged her tightly, kissing her hair a few times.

She continued, "You see, I never had just one nightmare on my mind. You were constantly in my thoughts; I could help it. I missed you so damn much; I thought I'd go insane without you. On top of that, that hotel kept showing up in my mind, all the time, so it made everything worse. Without you helping me get through it like you always do, everything I had to do in there, everything I saw was ten times worse for me. I never told you about any of it in detail and it all still bothers me so much that I don't even know if I can talk about it."

"Baby, I can't imagine the hell you went through in there; each time you even remember it or talk about it like you did last night, you get so upset even though many times you try to hide it. You're the strongest person I know; seeing you like this each time you remember that period is so horrible because I can see how much the memories of it all hurt you. You went through all kinds of difficulties before that day thanks to our job. You also went through all of that hell in that hotel; everyone said you did an amazing job over there. I know how strong you are and I know how much you can endure, but this obviously left many scars on you. Maybe it will help you get it out; maybe you'll feel better once you do. I know talking about it helped you last night, maybe talking about it some more will help you even more. I'm right here and I won't let you go, just let it out."

"I know you are and it helps me so much, talking about those parts last night helped and some of my guilt doesn't feel as bad, but all of it is just so…

I can't Tony, I just can't… What I saw, what I felt while I was in there was…"

"It's okay, I'm right here, you just go slowly. Tell me what you want and we'll deal with it all slowly, one step at a time. We don't have to talk about everything today or at all if you don't want to. We have all the time in the world," he said gently caressing her back. "Just remember that I'm here and I love you so much."

"I love you too, so much," Michelle said looking at him, she leaned her head back on his chest and Tony hugged her tightly. She was quiet for a while and Tony just held her. He thought she won't say anything today and he didn't want to force her; he just gently stroked her back, showing her he's there. But, after some time, when Tony was just about to suggest that they go for lunch, Michelle took a deep breath and started talking.

"Poor Gael died in so much pain; I hated looking at him like that. I had such a hard time staying firm and decisive after I saw him like that; it was horrible…

He's the first thing I remember each time I think about that hotel along with his wife and how their poor kids who lost both parents thanks to that day.

Our team dying… they were all so brave for going in there with me, ready to help, and they all died.

The face of the man I shot still haunts me and the look on his wife's face even more. All he wanted to do was save his life and I had to kill him. I had no choice but…

I saw women, men, young and old, die in front of me. Parents giving pills to their positive children telling them they'll make them feel better. They wanted to stop their agony before it even happened and then had to look at them fading away slowly… falling asleep for the final time."

Michelle shivered, Tony hugged her even tighter.

"People who got positive tests without showing symptoms yet, dragged into isolation kicking and screaming. Some of them died in such agony because they kept stalling and didn't taking the pills. The man who helped me so much during all of that, Mr. Phillips, he died too and I couldn't even let him talk to his wife. I felt so bad about it; I wanted to let him talk to her. I wanted it so much but I couldn't. I felt horrible because the only thing that kept me going when I felt bad in there was your voice. You have no idea how much that helped me; it kept me going. And I couldn't let him have the same thing… Oh Tony, you have no idea what I went through, I…" she took a deep breath.

"A lot of time passed since that day, but it all still upsets me so much. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry again and makes me feel horrible, even though you're holding me in your arms this time. I just want it all to be a bad memory, but it still feels so alive." She looked at him with eyes filled with tears, few of them sliding down her cheeks.

"Oh baby…" he kissed her forehead and wiped her tears away. "You suffered so much; I hate not being able to be there for you during it or after. I should've been. I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that, I really am. I hate even more that you were alone in all of this and you suffered on your own. You know now why I pushed you away, I had to do it. What I'm even sorrier about is the fact that I didn't talk to you about it all right away when I came home. I'm such an idiot for not doing it, for letting it all hurt you even more, when I could've helped you months ago," he said, looking sad and angry at himself. "I'm so, so very sorry sweetheart; I thought it would be easier when our life…"

Michelle stopped him by kissing him, "Hey, hey, we talked about this yesterday. It's okay, you don't have to apologize or worry about it anymore; I understand. Everything is okay, my love. I'll be fine. I have you with me, don't I?"

"See how easy it is for you to calm me down and assure me of everything," he gently rubbed his nose with hers.

"You have to do it for yourself too. You just have to stop blaming yourself for everything bad that happened on that day, because not one single thing that happened was your fault, okay?" Tony smiled.

"Baby, you didn't do anything wrong. Stop feeling guilty for surviving. None of our agents died because of you; they all died doing their duty. You did everything you could've; you gave them those pills that stopped them from suffering. You couldn't let that man escape, you tried to stop him, but it didn't work, you couldn't do anything else. And you couldn't let Mr. Phillips talk to his wife when the President told you not to. You couldn't honey, you did the best you could. You couldn't do anything more…"

"I know, you're right, but it will take a while for me to do it. I know I didn't do anything wrong, thanks to you I'm even more sure now; but it will take me some time to deal with everything because I still feel horrible. I'll get over it all though, I promise, as long as you're with me, holding me in your arms each time I have nightmares about it. I need you close to me, because with you I can get through anything."

"You know I'll be here for you; I'll be with you forever this time. I need you as much for all the things that still haunt me and with you by my side I can get through anything too."

"I'm not going anywhere. Just don't keep me out of it again."

"I promise, my love. I won't make that mistake again."

"Good," she smiled kissing him passionately. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, baby."

They hugged each other tightly and remained that way for a while, gently kissing and caressing without saying anything else.

"Want to go eat lunch at Gianni's? I can make us something for dinner when we come back home. I'm sure you're hungry and so am I."

"Yeah, I am, we could walk over there, it's such a beautiful day. I need to walk a bit, holding your hand and not think about anything else. I need to shake all of this away by focusing on nothing but the two of us. I just want to be happy with you and spend the rest of the day with you as close to me as possible. I have more things to handle from that day, but I can't talk about it anymore."

Tony pulled her close, "you don't need to talk about it anymore. We'll just spend this time together, enjoying being alone and without you having to go to work. We'll keep it all away from us and we won't separate for a second," he kissed her hair.

"That sounds perfect," she replied happily.

"Talking about it all hurts me and I know you don't like talking about what happened to you either. It's much better to get it all out this way though and we can help each other get over it."

"Yeah baby, it is much better," Tony smiled. "You were right when you wanted us to talk about it before. That was the right thing to do and I'm glad we're finally doing it. Next time I won't try doing things my way; I'll just listen to you," Tony said and Michelle smiled.

"There's no need for either of us to keep it all bottled up when we have each other to talk to about it."

"No baby, there's no need. You were right too, getting some of it off my chest helped and I feel better. I just don't want to talk about it anymore today, unless you want to talk more about your time in prison."

"No, I really don't. Not today anyway, even though it helped me talking about it too, just like it helped you. But talking about it all upsets us both and even though we need to talk about it more, I think we had more than enough for the time being. Yesterday drained us both and we talked more today, I think we both need a time out from it all. We can talk a bit every day."

"Yeah, I can't go into more of it right now, we'll take it slowly. We have all the time in the world," Michelle said, caressing his face.

"Yeah we do," Tony replied kissing her. "Let's go for our walk and lunch."

They got up and picked up the plates and glasses from the wooden table, taking them inside. A few minutes later they were on the beach, on their way to Gianni's.

Most of the walk they spent in silence, holding hands and kissing from time to time, enjoying being together.

Tony and Michelle arrived at Gianni's an hour later; both he and Gina were there and they ate with them; talking and laughing. Gianni and Gina were both thrilled that Tony would be starting working with them on Monday. They spent over two hours with them and when they were ready to go home Gina gave them more food she had just finished making.

"Here you go you two, I'm sure you'll be hungry by the time you get home. There's no need for you to cook Tony, since there's more food then we'll have guests tonight."

"Thank you Gina, this is great, you know how much we love your cooking. I was going to cook us something, but we're both tired."

"Yeah, I noticed you both look exhausted, that's the biggest reason why I'm giving this food to you, and so you can both rest as much as possible. You both look like you've been through hell, no matter how happy you appear. Is everything okay?"

Tony placed his arm around Michelle's waist, pulled her close to him, kissing her hair, "everything is okay now. The last couple of months haven't been easy for us, but we'll be okay. We took care of it and we're together, so we'll be alright," he said and Michelle kissed him.

"Yeah, we'll be okay Gina, don't worry about us. It was hard time for us both, but we're together and we handled it and we'll handle everything together in the future," she added.

"I'm glad you two are okay. I could feel something was wrong and Tony got us worried when he asked if you came by yesterday. Even though he hid it well, I knew something was wrong. I saw all these months from the way you two looked that it must've been a hard time for you both. I could see something was bothering you, even though it was obvious how in love and happy to be together you are. I can tell that you handled some of it, even though you look tired and drained. You both look much better and happier than during all this time. That same love is in your eyes like it always was, but the misery that was present during all this time seems to be almost gone and I know you'll be fine. Looking at you two like that was making both me and Gianni so sad even though we didn't want to say anything because we knew you'll deal with it on your own. And I'm so happy to see that we were right."

"Thanks Gina, you know us both so well. You're right, we had a horrible time but we took care of it, so you two can stop worrying about us," Tony smiled to her.

"I also want to thank you and Gianni again for letting me work here for a while; you have no idea how much it means to me. I won't be around for long, I promise, just while Michelle is still at Division and then we'll start our own business."

"You know you can stay with us forever, this place is yours anyway as much as it is ours, because you two are like children to us and you both know it. So stay as long as you need to stay. We're both thrilled to have you with us and we could use your help."

"I'm glad I'll be able to help and I'm happy to be with the two of you, at least for a while. If our business doesn't work out, I might stay longer, but I'm sure it will work out."

"I'd love you to stay with us, but I know you'll both be happier to work together in something that's closer to your old jobs and I'm sure you will do it soon."

"Yeah, I'm sure too. Michelle and I will make it all work," he smiled, kissing Michelle. "We should get going, Gianni needs you over there; we have a long walk home and we're both quite tired."

"You kids should go. You both look like you need some rest. We'll talk soon."

"Tony and I are lucky to have you guys, thanks for everything Gina, see you soon."

"Bye kids."

They both waved to Gianni and left. Walking home they were both in a much better mood, knowing they handled all the things that could separate them and that they'll be able to handle any future problem together. Both were thrilled because the future they both wanted was a step closer daily.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author note:**_I'm sorry for the delay on this chapter. Offline world got in the way. I'll be posting my chapters once a month for a while now and then in time I might get back to two a month again, or maybe less. I don't know how much time I will have to write. I hope you'll enjoy the rest of the story. Thanks for all the reviews, new ones are always appreciated._

Tony and Michelle wanted to spend the next few days enjoying being together as much as they could. They decided to try not to think about the time that was behind them or the fact that she'd be back at Division on Monday. Both couldn't wait for her to leave that place so they could fully free themselves of that part of their lives although they'd carry memories of it forever. Memories of time which gave them each other and incredible memories of the time they spent together during those 4 years. It also gave them a lot of bad memories, memories that wouldn't be so easy to forget. They knew perfectly well that it would take a long time for them both to really get over all the bad events that changed their lives and see them only as bad memories. Even though they didn't want to think about all of that and spend time being happy and relax, bad memories kept coming back to them. Talking about it all helped them both a lot. 

The first day of Michelle's "little vacation", as Tony liked to joke about it, was rainy and they spent the entire day indoors. After finishing dinner, they curled up next to each other on the couch.

"Want to watch TV?"

"No, I just want you to hold me like this; it's so wonderful. I need you close to me and I don't want to do anything else. This is perfect."

"Yeah, it feels pretty perfect to me too," Tony replied hugging her tighter, kissing her hair.

For quite some time they just sat like that, holding each other close without doing anything else; simply enjoying the closeness of the other.

"You know when you told me yesterday to let out things that bothered me from that day, from that hotel…" she paused without looking up and played with the button on his shirt.

"What is it, honey?" Tony lifted her head from his chest and looked into her eyes, "want to talk about it more?"

"I never really want to talk about it or think about it. Each time I remember it, all I want to do is block it somehow, make it all go away; but it keeps coming back to my mind. I can't help it. You were quite right yesterday, no matter how much it hurt to talk about it, sharing it with you helped me a lot."

"Baby, you can share it all with me, you know that. I'm here for you and I want you to get it off your chest. I want you to slowly put it all in the past where it belongs, just like I need to do it too. Just like you wanted us both to do and you were right; now is the time for us to do it. I know it will take us a while, especially because we kept it all bottled up for such a long time, but together we can do it," he smiled.

"I know we can honey, I know. It's all still so alive, it… I just hate it all and especially how it had to end."

"Oh honey; it's alive for me to, all of it, and I know exactly how you feel. But it's also over and we both have to let go of it and move on, just like we are slowly doing."

"Yeah, we do and I'm glad we're getting there," she caressed his chest, for a while they said nothing again. 

"You have no idea how many times I wished that they called you from Langley before it all had to happen and that we moved away before that day," Michelle started again.

"I know honey, I thought about it too; but we worked on that sting operation long before I got the job offer from Langley. I was expecting it all to happen before I would potentially transfer there. I just never expected it would go that way."

"Yeah, who could've imagined that to happen?"

"No one, but I guess that's the way it was supposed to happen. I know you still hate how it all turned out; but I keep being thankful daily that it turned out the way it did because it could've been much, much worse."

"Yeah, I could've lost you forever if that bullet hit you more directly," she caressed the scar on his neck. 

"You have no idea how scared I was during that time; waiting for you to get out of the OR, not knowing what's going on in there with you. I was completely losing my mind; I had such a hard time concentrating on work. That's why I forgot those things. I saw you on a live feed from the hospital; the doctor was digging in your neck and there was blood all over the place. It hit me so hard; I couldn't think of anything else," Michelle said kissing him. "All I could think about was you. I'm surprised I didn't make more mistakes, because no matter how hard I tried, my mind kept going back to you."

"Honey, you never told me you saw me in there. Why didn't you tell me this before and why did you torture yourself by looking at that?"

"It never came up; we didn't really have time to talk about anything when you came back. I had to look at it; I wanted to go to the hospital and be there with you, but I couldn't go. I called the hospital a few times but the nurse told me they'd call me when you get out. She couldn't tell me how you were doing in there and the wait seemed like it lasted a century. I wanted to be closer to you and see what was going on with you, but it only ended up scaring me even more, because it looked so horrible through that feed," Michelle said hugging him a bit tighter. 

"Oh honey and I treated you like an ass when I came back. I know this apology sounds stupid after such a long time, but I'm so sorry about that. I feel like a moron each time I remember how I treated you and I want to kick myself in the rear."

"When Kim told me that you didn't do things right, I got so scared because I knew you wouldn't make a mistake if something wasn't bothering you. I know I hurt your feelings when I went to Chappelle, but you gave me no choice. When you acted like that with me, it simply intensified my fear about you hiding your pain from me. I was sure you were hiding it from me by acting like that because you wanted to keep working. I saw you were in pain a few times, you drank all that water, you leaned yourself on the table for support, and I got so scared. I tried talking to you but when you brushed me off like that, no matter how much I didn't want to do it I didn't know what else to do. 

I'm sorry honey; I just wanted to protect you and make your pain stop and I didn't know how to do it. I was so scared for you because I could see that you were not well. I wanted you to go back to the hospital and be okay. I couldn't help being worried about you especially because I was the one who signed you out and I kept being afraid that something would happen to you because of my decision."

"Sweetheart, you made the right choice when you singed me out and you see that nothing happened to me because of it. You had to sign me out, without me that operation couldn't go on the way it did. I know you would've done an excellent job even if I wasn't there, but since Gael, Jack and I started it, I had to be there and explain it to President Palmer. Even if something did happen to me, it was my decision to get out of there and not yours. You just trusted me and did what I asked you to do, just like I would, that's all." 

"Yeah, I know; I don't blame myself for getting you out. Like you said, you had to be there and it was the right choice to make. Besides, I had no choice when you told me you needed me to trust you and I do," she smiled.

"Nope, you had no choice," he kissed her. 

"And honey, you're not the one who needs to apologize for anything that happened on that day, I am. I knew you knew I wasn't as well as I pretended to be and I wanted to stay. I tried to push you away so you wouldn't make me leave, but it was obviously a decision. I acted like an imbecile and if you acted that way with me I would think something was wrong too. I wish I talked to you normally. I felt so guilty how I treated you and I wanted to apologize to you so many times before you went into that hotel, but my damn character didn't let me do it. I just wanted to stay at CTU because I knew what was at stake and I couldn't go home or back to the hospital." 

"Yeah, I knew that and it's good that you remained there; you did so much on that day. I still wish you went home or back to the hospital, because maybe that way none of that would've happened the way it did and our lives could've gone in a completely different direction."

"Maybe, but I'm sure it would've happened anyway. There's no way anyone could've forced me to go home; I had to be there and besides, the only way I would've went home was with you and Ryan never would've sent you home with me so… It had to go the way it did so stop thinking about it. Such a long time passed from that day and we both need to stop thinking about what ifs; it happened the way it did and there's nothing we can do about it."

"Yeah, you're right. It's hard not to think about it, but I guess it had to go that way… Poor Ryan, I hate what happened to him. I still can't believe it each time I remember it. I think his death will haunt Jack for a very long time."

"I know; he talked to me about it a few times when he visited me, but you know him. I tried talking to him about it and about how he was doing; he would say two words about it and then he'd stop and change the subject. He keeps trying to pretend that he's okay when he's actually not."

"That's Jack for you," Michelle replied. "I couldn't force him to talk about himself either; he'd come to visit me like he promised you he'd do, but each time I'd try talking to him about him, he'd change the subject."

"Yeah, he was never good with showing his feelings to anyone or talking about himself. I guess losing Terri made him that way. He only talks to Kim and she has her own family now."

"I still can't believe she and Chase are raising his daughter now."

"Tell me about it. When I first met her, she was a spoiled teen and now she's a mother. I just hope they'll manage to raise Angela without leaving serious issues on the little girl because both are…" he whistled and grinned.

Michelle laughed, "Yeah, they're a perfect match."

"That they are," Tony laughed too. 

Michelle hugged him tightly leaning her head back on his chest; either didn't say anything for a while. 

Tony started this time. "That day could've turned out much worse for us both, it didn't turn perfectly but we're together and that's all that matters," he said caressing her back. 

"You said you could've lost me because of the bullet, like that was the only time we could've lost each other. What about you? I could've lost you too, twice. I could've lost you in that hotel and then again later when that freaking maniac took you. I still shiver each time I remember the fear I went through waiting for those test results, thinking I might lose you. I thought I'd die waiting for them and I can only imagine what went through your head."

"I kept thinking about you, how you'd react if I turned out to be positive because I was sure I was. I couldn't believe when I opened that envelope and it was negative. I was so sure I was going to die. I already had a pill ready to use. They gave them to everyone, just in case we turned out to be positive and I couldn't stop thinking what that would do to you."

"Oh baby," Tony hugged her tightly, pulling her as close to him as possible, kissing her hair a few times. 

"I still can't believe how close I came to losing you. If you turned out to be positive, I would've come over there to be with you, no matter what they'd say. 

I would've died with you."

"I know; that's exactly what was scaring me, so much. I knew you'd react like that and I didn't even know how or when to tell you that I was positive, right away or when it was too late for you to come. All I wanted was to protect you from suffering and I knew you'd suffer either way," she said, Tony kissed her again. "I didn't want anything bad happening to you and I knew that if something bad happened to me you'd do something that would end up hurting you or even worse, killing you; and that was the last thing I wanted. I didn't even care what would happen to me, because somehow I felt I deserved to die when they all died. All I worried about was you. I felt such a relief when I saw that result and was able to tell you that I'd be okay. I couldn't wait to be in your arms so we could make it all go away together. However, as soon as our call ended, I felt guilty for being okay, for surviving, because everyone kept dying around me. I thought I didn't deserve to go home to you and be happy again. When you went to prison I thought it was my punishment for surviving and being the one to take them all in there." 

"Hey, hey, how many times do I have to tell you that there's no reason for you to feel guilty about anything that happened on that day? And my going to prison is most certainly not your fault or your punishment for anything because you didn't do anything wrong and you didn't deserve anything bad happening to you. Honey, none of it is your fault, not a single thing. Stop thinking like that, please," Tony looked at her, worried.

"I know, thanks to you, I know that now," Michelle smiled. "Thanks to you I feel much better about that whole day, and I'm slowly accepting it. I just had to tell you how I felt."

"Of course you had to and I want you to tell me all of it. I want you to get it all off your chest," he said, kissing her gently. "I just don't want you to think that it's true anymore, that's all."

"I told you I'm working slowly towards it and thanks to you I don't feel so guilty anymore; I feel much better. But that whole day is still so alive and it keeps waking one bad memory after another and I can't help it. You'll just have to be patient with me."

"You know I will be," Tony smiled.

"Yeah, I know," she replied, leaning her head back on his chest.

"You have no idea what a relief I felt when you told me that you'd be okay. I felt like someone lifted a ton off of my heart. Then I got that call and I saw you on the screen with a knife under your beautiful eye," he gently kissed her eyes. 

"How can you possibly think that I should've let them hurt you, huh? I didn't know where you were and they told me they'd yank your eye out and hurt you slowly. I knew they would do it and I couldn't let them do that to you. I didn't care what would happen to me, as long as I managed to save you."

"Oh baby, I know. You told me so many times before how you felt that day and I love you for it. You couldn't let them hurt me, but because of what you did you ended up hurt, so badly. You ended up treated like a traitor; which you're not. You got stabbed in prison where you didn't belong in the first place. You even started drinking and a ton of even worse things could've happened to you, all because of me."

"I thought we handled this? I don't blame you for anything honey, stop it, stop blaming yourself, please, none of it was your fault."

"I know, I know," Michelle hugged him tightly. "It's over and I'm not guilty for anything. Everything that happened was supposed to happen that way and none of it is our fault. We just got caught in the middle of an unfortunate chain of events. I know; it's just that… it was such a horrible day and even though I know all you told me is true, it still makes me feel awful. I told you before; you'll have to be patient with me," Michelle smiled. Tony's reply was a gentle kiss on her lips. 

"Do you want to talk about that hotel some more?" he asked.

"No, I really don't. Mostly only gruesome details remain which I want to forget. I'll tell them to you one day, but not now; I can't talk about it anymore. We talked a lot about it yesterday and a bit more today. I don't think I can go into it once again, no matter how much talking to you helps me. 

I just can't, not now anyway, I'm done for now."

Tony looked at her, "Okay baby, you don't have to. However, you have to promise me that you won't keep it bottled up anymore. You have to promise me you'll talk to me about anything that bothers you from now on. No matter what it is, even if it seems silly, you come to me, promise?"

"I promise baby," Michelle smiled. "And you come to me."

"I will," he smiled back.

"We talked mostly about me today, what about you?"

"Well, I want to tell you something about my drinking. I know this bothers you a lot even though we talked a bit about it already."

"Yeah, it does. When I saw you that way…" she took a deep breath, kissing his chest. 

"I couldn't believe my eyes. You didn't seem like yourself; you were like someone I didn't know. You looked in so much pain. When I saw you like that I blamed myself even more; for not trying harder to get through to you even though I noticed you were suffering, for not noticing you were drinking, for all kinds of things. All the nightmares I had, all the things I told you about since, crashed on me the minute I saw you that way. I blamed myself for your state even more and I couldn't live with myself. I felt like I was a bad wife…" Tony cupped her face and stopped her by placing his thumbs gently over her mouth.

"Bad wife? How can you even think that? You tried your best to get through to me; you just thought I'd start talking without you pushing me, because you wanted me to be as happy as possible. You thought I'd come to you to talk things through, the way we always did before that damn day, like I should've done and like an idiot didn't do," kissing her he looked deeply into her eyes. 

"Sweetheart, listen to me good; none of it is your fault. You shouldn't blame yourself for a single thing because it's not your fault. Okay?" he asked upset. 

"I now know it's not. That's just the way I've felt before we talked about it all. I now know it's not my fault baby. It's okay. I just hated to see you drunk, that's all. Seeing you that way made me feel bad; made me think it's my fault. However, now that you've explained things to me, I don't feel that way anymore." 

"I'm so angry with myself. Each time I hear how much you suffered because of me, I want to kill myself. The only thing I ever wanted was for you to be happy and look how much suffering I caused you," he said visibly mad at himself.

"Tony, stop it. Don't be so hard on yourself," she caressed his face, calming him down. 

"You didn't do this to hurt me; you did it because you thought you were protecting me. You did it because you thought you were the only one suffering and you were trying to spare me all the grief. Baby, we handled all of this before. I don't blame you for anything. I just want you to be okay. You already told me you don't blame me for anything and you told me you won't drink anymore; that's all that matters to me. I just want you to be happy."

"I am happy my love. I'm the happiest and luckiest man alive because I have you by my side. That's what I wanted to tell you when I started this conversation. I know I told you about my drinking a bit when we cleared things, but I want to repeat some of the things because I want to assure you I won't do that again. I'm so sorry you had to see me like that. I know how much it hurt you and made you worry. It's obviously still worrying you. You have no idea how much I regret hurting you that way. I promise you my love; I'll never do it again. I'll never hurt you again and I'll never drink again." 

Michelle only smiled and nodded, kissing him without saying a word. 

"I don't have a drinking problem, I promise. I only tried to forget all my troubles, but it didn't work. I'm an idiot; I was sure I could handle it on my own without worrying you more. When I saw that I couldn't, instead of coming to you and telling you how horrible I felt like I should've done; I went to the damn bottle and felt even worse. With each beer I felt worse, but I kept drinking; I have no idea why. Thanks to my stupidity I ended up hurting you and that was the last thing I wanted. I just should've told you how pathetic I feel about not being able to find a job. I was so miserable because I kept thinking that if I couldn't find a simple thing to do; how could I ever run a company successfully? And I want to run it. I want our company to work. I want to work with you, but I thought with the rate I was going I'd never do it. I kept thinking how I'd end up disappointing you and ruin our future. Even though you already told me that I shouldn't feel this way I can't help but still think like this," he said looking miserable.

"Oh baby, don't feel that way. You never should've felt that way. It's only been 6 months that you can't find a job. That doesn't mean you would ruin our future; there are tons of people without a job and I'm sure you would've found it eventually. Even if our future went in a different direction, even if it still does, it will be our future and it will be perfect. I don't care what we'll do just as long as we do it together and we spend it together. I'm proud of you and that will never change, no matter where our future goes. You're my wonderful husband and you could never, ever disappoint me."

Tony smiled, "I'm one lucky guy," he said caressing her face. 

"I feel happy to go to work, even if it is only for Gianni and Gina. I'll get out of the house for a bit and I'll earn some money. That's a start and maybe I won't disappoint our kids if I remain with Gianni, if our company doesn't work. At least I'll make mean pizzas."

"Our company will work, and it won't be a big company; it will be a small family business. That's much better so we can have time for our family too. And why would you think our kids will be disappointed in you? They'll grow up in a family with two loving parents and they'll know their father was willing to risk his own freedom to save their mother. They shouldn't be disappointed in you, but feel lucky to have you. Like I feel," she smiled. "I love you so much."

"I love you too baby, more than I can say; and I know you're right. Everything will be okay, it will just take some time, but no matter what happens we'll be together and it will be perfect just because of that."

"Exactly," Michelle caressed his face. "You keep telling me to stop worrying. Use that on yourself too. We'll be fine."

"Yeah, we will be; you're right. I should just listen to you and do what you say. I'll be much happier that way. I should've listened to you right away. Maybe I would've started working with Gianni months ago and maybe we wouldn't have had to go through the hell we went through the other day."

Michelle looked at him, "What did you tell me about maybes and what ifs, huh?" she smiled. "Things went the way they were supposed to and both you and I should stop worrying about what should've happened and concentrate on our present and future. Promise me you won't worry so much and you will come to me with every problem you might have."

"I'll promise you, if you promise me you'll come to me with yours."

"I promise baby."

"Okay, then I promise too."

"Okay, good," Michelle smiled; leaning her head back on his chest, she yawned.

"Why don't we go to bed? We talked enough for one day; we should get some rest now. After all those months, I think we'll both need ton of sleep before get back to our old selves," he said, gently caressing her back.

Michelle looked at him and smiled, kissing his neck, "We could go to bed, but the last thing I want to do right now is sleep. I want to show you how much I love you," she whispered seductively, nuzzling his ear, kissing his neck again.

Tony looked into her eyes and kissed her passionately. Without saying a word, he lifted her in his arms and carried her to their bed.

When Tony placed Michelle down next to their bed, they took turns slowly taking each others clothes off; kissing all the naked parts in the process. When they were both naked, Michelle gently sat Tony down on their bed, kissing his neck and lips going with her fingers through his hair while he gently caressed her all over. When Michelle's lips slowly moved down to his chest and abdomen, Tony stopped her from going further by gently lifting her to her feet, kissing her passionately. 

He gently caressed her back with his finger tips, sending goose bumps all over her body. Kissing her stomach, Tony pulled Michelle as close to him as possible. They lowered themselves together on the bed in a tight embrace.

A few hours later when they were both completely satisfied Tony and Michelle remained lying in their bed, holding each other tightly. Michelle remained on top of him, looking into his eyes lovingly; she gently caressed his chest while Tony caressed her face.

"Do you know how much I love you?"

"I think I have a pretty good idea," he smiled looking into her eyes, "and you? Do you know how much I love you?"

"I think so," she smiled back.

"I love your smile so much," Tony said kissing her lips. 

"It kept me going in that prison. Each time I felt horrible I would close my eyes and imagine you smiling and I felt better again. I want you to smile again all the time, like you used to before all of that happened."

"I will baby, soon, I promise" Michelle replied kissing him back. 

"I missed your smile too, I love it as much. It kept me going, just like mine kept you going. I want you to smile all the time like you used to too. And soon we both will, you'll see. It will just take us a little bit longer; we just need to be patient and everything will go back the way it used to be. When I stop working at Division, we'll start living free of our past life and start with the future we planned. Things will be even better then and we'll start smiling even more. We'll be able to put the bad things behind us and keep the good parts as incredible memories we'll treasure forever. Even though that place made us miserable during all this time thanks to that one day; we have 4 wonderful years we spent working there together and all the incredible things that happened to us during that time to hold on to. Because part of us will always love that job, no matter how much we want it all to be over with."

"You're right, I can't lie to you or to myself; part of me will always love that job. If none of that ever happened we'd probably be still in CTU and we'd be happy about it. And no matter how much I hate it all because of what happened to us on that day, I can't hate that place. It gave me the most incredible thing in the world, something that changed my life for the better and made me a better man. The only thing I want to live for, fight for and never give up because of. The only thing I never want to let go and the only thing that makes it all worth it… You," he smiled, kissing her gently. 

"Even though it almost took you away from me forever and gave me so many nightmares, it gave me you and I'll never stop being grateful for that. You're my entire life, you complete me and without you by my side I feel empty. My life has no meaning without you; you're my only reason worth living for," Michelle caressed his face. 

They remained in silence for a long time, hugged tightly, looking into each others eyes.

"There's no point of denying it; I'll always like that job, just like you will; but I also know we'll love whatever we'll do on our own because we'll be doing it together," Tony smiled. 

"Yeah honey, I know that too. I know it for sure; I miss working with you so much, and I'm looking forward to doing it again."

"No matter how hard this whole time was; I think we're much, much better. We finally discussed it all. We'll talk more and even though bad things that happened to us will haunt us for a while; we already have a good reason to smile. We're together; we're in love. We'll never be apart again and nothing in this world will change that."

"No, nothing will," Michelle replied happily.

Tony hugged her tightly, "I love you so much," he said gently caressing her face.

"I love you too, so much," she replied, kissing him.

Tony kissed her neck a few times, nuzzling her ear, caressing her back, sending a wave of goose bumps all over her body, making her lose breath. 

His eyes were filled with desire when he looked into hers, "I want to show you how much I love you again," he said. 

Michelle didn't say anything; she just kissed him passionately showing him how much she wants him too; without breaking their hug he rolled them together on the bed.


	12. Chapter 12

**Author note:** _Thanks for all the reviews. New ones are always appreciated._

Over the next few days, Tony and Michelle didn't spend a moment apart. They were completely happy being together, feeling as though all the weight had been lifted from their shoulders. Tony and Michelle felt more content than they had in a long time.

Even though nightmares from the past months still haunted them, each other's closeness and words of comfort helped them both to get over them quickly.

Michelle was thrilled to see her husband being happy about going to work with Gina and Gianni. After they finally talked about everything that bothered them, he was smiling more than he had all those months. Tony was happy to see that his wife wasn't worried about him or their situation nearly as much.

Both knew that they had a long way to go before they could have the future they wanted, but for the first time in all these months, nothing was standing in their way. The only thing that kept nagging Tony was a tiny voice in the back of his head that kept telling him something bad would happen to his wife while she was still working at Division and that he'd end up losing her. Even though they decided to share everything, Tony chose to keep to himself how worried he was about her working at Division. Knowing his fear is irrational; Tony didn't see the point of worrying Michelle about it too. He kept shaking the voice away by telling himself that it's simple irrational paranoia caused by everything they went through and not because something would happen. For a while he would convince himself, but only for a while.

"No," Michelle smiled.

"No, huh?" Tony replied happily. He started kissing her bare stomach, nuzzling it, and tickling her, which made Michelle laugh and let go of him.

"Not fair," she said still laughing. He lifted himself up to her face and kissed her passionately. She hugged him tightly again, wrapping her legs around his waist. "Got you again and I'm not letting go this time."

"Baby, as much as I want to stay here with you, you have to go. We both have to."

"Okay," Michelle replied, pretending to pout, without letting go of him.

"I promise, we'll pick up right here when we come back home…" Tony smiled. "Right here," he said, kissing her neck in the way only he knew how, making her gasp for air.

They looked into each others eyes lovingly, "Deal?" he asked.

"Deal," she replied, kissing him. "I love you so much."

"I love you too baby. You have no idea how much I wish we could stay like this forever, but we have to go. You will stop working there soon and then we'll take a nice vacation; just the two of us without anyone bugging us."

"Sounds great."

"Come on, we should go. How 'bout we take a nice long shower together first?"

"Excellent idea," she replied happily.

They kissed a few more times and went to the bathroom together.

Ready to go to work, they got into the kitchen 45 minutes later.

Tony opened the fridge, "I have to go buy food today; there's enough for breakfast, but we used up almost everything else. I can go after my shift and we can meet at home."

"You could or we could go together, like we used to, before that day. I already miss you and I didn't even go to work yet. Being over there all day without you makes me miserable. During all these months you went shopping on your own and I miss going with you. We were only able to go together on weekends and sometimes we even skipped those too, so we could spend as much time together doing other things. Not that I'm complaining," she smiled.

"The worst part is… We work in separate places and if you go after work on your own; it will only separate us more."

"Good idea honey. I didn't look at it that way. I miss going with you too and I most certainly don't want to be apart from you more than necessary. We'll go shopping together. But we can't stay for long because we have other plans," Tony grinned.

Michelle wrapped her arms around his neck, "Oh, I don't plan on staying long," she replied happily, kissing the top of his nose. "Drive me to work, take the car and pick me up. We can go buy groceries together and maybe even eat dinner outside, so we can do what we planned the minute we come home."

"Sounds like a plan," Tony kissed her neck. "Now, I better make us something to eat," he said and went back to the fridge, deciding what to make for them.

"Baby?"

"What is it sweetheart?" Tony turned around, wrapping his arms around her.

"I forgot when I told you to come to pick me up that you don't like going to Division or even calling there. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable dropping me off or picking me up. I'm sorry baby; I wasn't thinking. I just wanted you to come to get me so we can spend as much time together. It will be faster that way, but not by much; we don't have to do it like that. I can leave you with Gianni and come back to get you and then we can go."

"Oh baby, don't worry about it. I want to do this. I want to drop you off everyday and pick you up. I wanted to do it during all this time too, but I couldn't.

I couldn't look at anything that had to do with my previous employment; I needed a break from it all, but I want to do it now. I don't want that place or CTU controlling my life or my future. I can do it just fine," he smiled, "it won't bite me. Besides, I'll be concentrated on you and you alone. Stop worrying my love. I'll be fine, this will help me."

"Okay, if you're sure."

"Yeah, I'm sure," he said kissing her. "Now, come on; help me decide what we'll eat."

An hour later, Tony dropped Michelle off at Division.

"Have a great day honey; I hope you'll enjoy your first day at work. Don't let Gianni wear you out too much. I'm going to need your full strength tonight," she said seductively, kissing him.

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that," he grinned, kissing her back. "Have a great day too baby. I love you so much."

"I love you too honey," she caressed his face. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too. You better go before I change my mind and take you back home," he smiled.

"I better… before I make you do it." Michelle kissed him one more time and got out of the car. "Send my love to both Gianni and Gina. Bye honey."

"I will baby. Bye."

As Tony watched her going in, she turned around and smiled, waving at him; he smiled and waved back.

He remained in front of Division for a few more minutes. While looking at the building his fears and anger came back. Even though he had learned to control his anger toward that place, he still hated what happened. Tony hated what his wife had to go through during that time. He hated how they all still see him and above all he hated not being able to be there with her. Tony didn't care about working there anymore; he just wanted to be there with her in case he needed to protect her from something bad. His fear for his wife was bigger than anything else. Tony knew that if he lost her, his life would lose any sense. He also knew that he would have a hard time controlling his pain and anger in that situation… if his broken heart wouldn't kill him first. Tony tried to shake the thoughts of that kind of ending and tried to focus on the happy future that was lying ahead but couldn't. The nagging little voice inside his head kept bugging him, telling him something bad would happen.

Tony shook it off again, thinking how paranoid he was for even entertaining the thought._ "She'll be safe there if something happens" _he thought. _"Safer than anywhere else and there's no reason why she should have to go to CTU so she'll be okay." _

"Stop it", he whispered to himself. "Everything will be fine. You won't lose her."

Half convincing himself, Tony drove to Gianni's.

Michelle walked into Division with a smile on her face. She couldn't believe how well things were going for them; for the first time since that day happened she was completely happy. Even though she knew ton of things needed to be taken care of before their future could happen, Michelle believed that it would all happen the way she and her husband planned. What made her even happier was the fact that nothing would separate her from her love anymore.

Michelle walked into her office thinking how miserable she was last time she was there and how happy she is now. Even the whole stack of files she needed to clear before the end of the day didn't ruin her good mood.

Sometime later while working on the files, Michelle was still smiling and humming some tune that got stuck in her head since that morning while Tony was driving her to work. She was so concentrated on her work and her thoughts that she didn't notice her boss.

"Hey Michelle," Bill Buchanan said.

Michelle was surprised by his voice and looked up, "Hey Bill. Sorry, I didn't see you there. My mind is elsewhere and I have ton of work to do."

"Yeah, I noticed you were somewhere else. I just wanted to see how you're feeling although I don't have to ask; your smile says enough."

"Yeah, I'm much better. What was bugging me is gone and I feel great."

"I'm glad. How is your husband?"

Michelle smiled even more at the thought of Tony, "he's better too. He went to work today."

"Really?"

"Yeah, he's looking for a job during these past months and he couldn't find anything that was right for him. We have a dear friend, more like a family to us, who told him to come to work for him until he finds something better. He needed his help and Tony needed to get out of the house, so…

It's only temporarily though, 9 months tops, depending how things will…," she paused.

"I wanted to talk to you about something; I wanted to wait till the end of the day, but I guess this is as good time as any."

"Please, feel free. What is it?"

"Bill… Tony and I decided to leave this life far behind us… as far as possible. I wanted to inform you of what we decided. I don't want to work here anymore because I want to work with my husband again; we both miss working together. We'll either work together in the private sector although we'd prefer to start a company on our own. Without Tony, this job is no longer what it used to be for me, which is why I want to leave. My husband and I want to work together again and we'll make sure we do; one way or the other."

"I see you two discussed it and you seem determined in your plans. Are you sure that's the right decision? I don't think it's the best solution for you. Your career is going so well. You can do so much with your life; you shouldn't start over again when you've come this far. There is no limit to what you can do in the Agency; you're an excellent agent and Tony is... well, he's a…"

Michelle stopped him. "My career doesn't mean anything to me anymore. My husband is the only thing that matters to me. And yes, I'm sure Bill; I'm absolutely sure. It was a joint decision. Tony would never force me to leave this place or do something I didn't want; he loves me too much. And this is something I want too; more than anything. I know what you all think of my husband and that's one more reason for me to leave."

"I didn't mean to offend you in any way. You know I see you as a friend and I'd never… what Tony did is not a secret or what he is in most people's eyes. I was just worried about your decision and looking after your best interests…"

"I know Bill; I'm sorry for over reacting, but that kind of attitude is destroying Tony and he doesn't deserve it. My husband did what he did out of love for me; he only did it to save my life without thinking about consequences for himself. He paid for it in that prison where he didn't belong in the first place; we both paid for it during that time. He is a great man and a hard worker. Tony knows his job better than anyone I know. He tried his best to find a job during all this time and was rejected each time. It nearly destroyed us both; I couldn't bear looking at him like that which is why I want both of us away from this life and away from anything that ties us it. We'll both be better off. It's in my best interest to stay with him; without him nothing matters. Thank you for worrying about me Bill, but I'll be fine with my husband."

"I can see you mean it and it's obvious you're certain in your future."

"Yes, I do mean it. I'm absolutely confident in our future. I know everything will be great because my husband and I will be together and we'll make it work."

"When are you planning on leaving?"

"Three months tops. That's why I wanted to tell you about it, so you'll have enough time to find my replacement. You may start looking when you want, I won't mind leaving sooner."

"Okay. If you change your mind, there will always be place for you here."

"Thank you, but I won't be changing my mind."

"I'm sure you won't. I'll leave you to your work," Bill said. Turning around, he walked away.

Michelle buried herself back into the files for the next few hours. Thinking about the end of her shift; hoping the time to be back in her husband's arms would come fast.

Tony arrived at Gianni's half an hour after he dropped Michelle off at Division. He managed to control the nagging voice by thinking about his wife and about their life together. Since he didn't want to jinx their chances of having a happy future by planning far ahead; he decided to make plans in his head for what they'd do when he picks her up from work. Thinking about it all and about her made him happy again, so he walked into the diner with a smile on his face.

"Hey you two," he called to Gianni and Gina.

"Hey Tony," Gianni smiled.

"Hey dear," Gina added from the kitchen. "It's so good to see you."

"It's good to be here."

"How is Michelle?" Gina asked.

"She's great, she went to work. She sends her love to both of you."

"I see you two are doing great. You finally look like your old self again and that huge smile is back on your face."

"Yeah, we're doing really great. We're finally happy the way we used to be; we're getting there anyway."

"What's going on?"

"Nothing, I'm just worried about her, that's all…" he paused and smiled. "But what else is new."

"Why are you worried this time? The fact that she's still working over there is bothering you still, huh?" Gianni asked.

"Yeah, I won't have a moment of peace until she leaves that place for the final time."

"I know. I keep worrying about her too. But she's not at CTU anymore. She's at Division and she has a desk job. No one will send her in the field, like they sent her in that damn hotel," Gina said.

"You're right. That's what I keep telling myself too. Even if something bad does happen, she'll be safe in there. It's just… Thanks to the damn luck we had, I keep worrying that somehow she'll end up in danger and I'll end up losing her. I don't know what I would do without her, guys. I would die of a broken heart if I had to spend one day away from her. I just don't want anything bad happening to her, that's all. She's my whole life."

"Yeah, we know she is." Gianni patted him on the back. "From the first time you two walked into this diner together, I knew she'd be your life forever. I've known you since you were a teen, feel I raised you, and I've never seen you happier than on that day. Well, I did every day after that day, but you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Tony smiled. "I brought her here for the first time 10 days after we started dating. I was already more in love with her than I ever was with anyone else, and happier than I've been my whole life. I told her I loved her on that very night, right on that peer out there, and she told me she loved me back," Tony's smile widened when he remembered that night.

"You were engaged less than two months later." Gianni said.

"And married four months after that," Gina added.

"Yeah," Tony replied happily. "It took us only couple of weeks of dating to know we'll be together forever and only 6 months to become husband and wife. Those three years were so incredible. They were the best three years of our lives. Each day I spent in prison I thought of the time we were together and each time I did, I knew my decision was right. I'd do it again if I had to without thinking twice about it. I'd die for her. The fact that I won't be able to help her if something happens again is driving me crazy."

"Don't think like that. Nothing bad will happen to her, and besides, your wife is a resourceful woman; she can take care of herself. She'll be fine, my son, don't worry anymore, especially without a reason to worry. You won't lose her and these years will only be a beginning of an incredible life for you two, because I know you'll spend many more years to come together."

"You're right Gina. We will, I should keep thinking positively and everything will be fine," Tony smiled. "Thanks you two, you've been a great support for us both. We couldn't wish for better. You're like a family to us both."

"You two are like kids we never had and you know it."

"Yeah, we do. You guys were like parents to me my whole life; to both me and Robert."

"Yeah, we practically raised you two. Then he brought Tess and she became part of it all, she became like a daughter to us. Then you brought Michelle, and our family just expanded. She became like a daughter to us in a heart beat. She won us over the first day we met her."

"She liked you guys too, right away. She told me more than once that you two are like parents she lost long time ago. You know she only has that crazy brother of hers and you two became like a family to her."

"We love every minute we spent with you guys."

"We do too and we'll spend together many more time to come."

"Yeah we will," Gianni smiled, patting him on the back so hard Tony lost air for a second.

"You'll kill him, you big bear you," Gina said, slapping Gianni on the head lightly.

All three laughed.

"Now come on, let's get some work done," Tony said. "Even though I love talking to you guys and could do this all day, I came here to work."

"Yeah, you did. Today is your first day so I would normally show you around the diner; where everything is, around the storage room and so on. However, since you've been coming here your whole life; you know this place as well as I do, so there's no need for that."

"Nope, I know this place like a back of my hand."

"Exactly, so you'll have to help me with some lifting today. We received supplies for the store and we need to sort it out. We won't open before dinner today, there's too much work to be done. Gina will prepare us lunch."

"Okay, let's get started. I'll only have to call Michelle around lunch time; we always talk then. Gina, remind me to call her, please."

"Like you'll need a reminder," Gina winked.

"Yeah, she never comes out of my mind, but still. I don't want to forget by accident. It will make her worry and that's the last thing I want to do."

"Don't worry, my son. I'll remind you," Gina smiled.

"Thanks."

The next few hours Tony spent helping Gianni moving a ton of food supplies from the back alley to the storage room. Even though this wasn't the work he was used to, Tony was happy to be out of the house and working again. The time to call Michelle came much faster than it did for her.

A few hours later Michelle was on her way back to her office from cafeteria with her lunch, when her cell phone rang.

"Hey my love," she heard Tony's loving voice on the other side.

"Hey," Michelle replied happily, "how are you my love? You sound happy."

"I am happy. I've been working my ass off with Gianni and even though it's not the job I'm used to do, the time without you is going much faster and I feel more useful again. I'm great."

"You have no idea how glad I am to hear that. I'm so glad you're enjoying working for Gianni."

"I sure am. We're joking and working at the same time. It's great to be with the two of them; reminds me of my childhood."

"Good, I'm so glad. You'll have to tell me all about it when you come to get me tonight."

"I will sweetheart. I can't wait to come to get you."

"Neither can I; I miss you so much."

"I miss you too. I'll come sooner than you think and then we'll be on our own, just the two of us and I won't let you go for one second."

"You promise?"

"I promise sweetheart," he replied lovingly. "Did you eat already?"

"No, you caught me on my way back to my office from cafeteria with my lunch. Did you eat?"

"No, Gina is making us lunch; we'll be eating in an hour or so."

"Lucky you, I wish I could be there with you guys."

"I wish you could be too. Gina is making her pizza."

"Mmmm, I'll be eating the same sandwich I always eat. It's not too great, but it's the best thing they have here. You know how these people are; they all just work. Food doesn't matter to them."

Tony laughed. "Don't you worry; I'll feed you well when you get out of there."

"Good, I'll hold you to that one," Michelle giggled. "And I can't wait for the dessert," she whispered seductively.

"I can't wait either gorgeous," he replied huskily. "I love you so much."

"I love you too sweetheart. Say Hi to Gianni and Gina for me. I'll see you later."

"I will. See you later sweetheart."

Some time later, Michelle walked out of Division and looked for her husband. She saw him across the road, leaning on the car, looking at her with a huge smile on his face. When Michelle saw how happy he looked, a huge smile broke on her face too. Her husband finally looked like his old self again and she couldn't be happier about it. Their life was slowly getting back to normal. It wasn't the way it used to be, but she knew it would be; she knew it will be even better because they'll be together and nothing will separate them again. Michelle rushed across the road and jumped into his arms, hugging him tightly. They kissed lovingly for a while. When their kisses broke, Tony spun her around.

"I missed you so much," he said burying his face in her neck.

"I missed you too," Michelle replied. "I hate going back to work alone after spending days in your arms. I miss you even more then."

"I know; I miss you more then too," Tony said putting her down on the floor without letting go of her. "Though I always miss you when you're not with me, seconds seem like hours. I'm so happy to have you back," he said kissing her.

"Someone would think we were apart for who knows how long and it's been only 10 hours that we last saw each other."

"To them that's 10 hours, to me that's 10 years," Tony smiled.

"Yeah," she smiled back, hugging him tightly, "time apart seems twice as bad now. Especially when you add everything else we went through during all this time."

"I know, and the fact that you're still working in there is only making our time apart worse. That place still brings back bad memories, whether we want it or not," Tony replied. "This will be over soon though, and then we won't be apart again… this way anyway."

"I can't wait."

"Neither can I."

They remained like that for a while, kissing and holding each other tightly, forgetting where they were.

"You forgot that we're still here, in front of Division; someone might see you kissing a traitor," Tony joked.

"Let them, I don't care," Michelle replied, kissing him again.

"We should go. We have to go buy groceries and eat something; and I'm so eager to put our plans from this morning in action," he said, caressing her face gently.

"So am I," she replied looking at him lovingly. "If I weren't so hungry, I would go home, skip dinner and go straight for the dessert."

"You wouldn't hear any complaints from me, but we have to feed you first. You don't want to collapse," Tony grinned, "because once I get you, I won't let you go so easily."

"I'll hold you to that," Michelle giggled. "Let's get out of here baby."

"Let's go."

Tony and Michelle arrived at the shopping mall 20 minutes later. They walked around the mall for a while looking at the store windows, holding hands and having a great time together. Deciding to eat first, they sat down in a restaurant on the top floor of the mall where they often ate when they would go shopping after work.

"Don't tell Gianni, but I like this place. It has a great view of the ocean."

"Yeah, don't tell him that I like it too," Tony smiled.

"I'm glad we decided to come here again. This place brings back some nice memories."

"It sure does, I'm glad too," Tony kissed her.

"Honey, I have to talk to you about something that's bugging me. I don't want to go into serious things on such a nice evening but I need to talk to you about this."

"You should tell me. We'll try to get worries out of your mind and then we'll be able to enjoy our evening even more," she smiled, caressing his face. "What's bothering you, baby?"

"Gianni insists on paying me more than I think he should and I don't know what to do."

"I was afraid they'd try something like that."

"I know. That's why I kept stalling on taking the job there in the first place. He should pay me regular money, even less maybe. I can't take all the money he wants me to take. It's not like I'm doing much over there. I just helped Gianni with transferring supplies from the back alley to the storage room, plus Gina is feeding me all the time. When we were done they said that was it for today and wanted to pay me right away, and I only worked for a few hours…"

"They just want to help you, baby."

"Yeah, they act like my parents, because that's what they've been to me most of my life. But they still shouldn't do it."

"Tell them that."

"I tried, but they keep insisting."

"Tell them you'll stop working for them if they insist on over paying you. That should make them stop."

"You're right; it did because that's exactly what I told them. Though I don't know if it worked, we'll have to wait and see."

"You won't be working there for long and then they won't have to feel like they need to help you."

"I know, but I told them that we have a lot of money saved and that we can handle our situation fine. I told them that I only came to work there because they said they needed my help and not to get paid for not working. I also told them that if they insist on paying me more money than I earn, I'll leave."

"How did they react on that?"

"They gave me another ton of things to do," Tony laughed. "I nearly keeled over under all those bags of flour, sugar, salt, fruit and who knows what else. I rearranged half of the storage room and I have as much to rearrange tomorrow."

"Awww, my poor baby. I'm going to have to give you a nice long massage when we get home. That should relax those muscles," Michelle said, gently going up and down his arm with her fingertips. Her gentle and feathery touch gave him goose bumps, "Mmmm, I can't wait," he replied, kissing her.

A few minutes later waiter arrived with their food.

"You know, when Gianni told me he'd have to look for someone soon, so I can help him train the person before I leave; at first I thought he was only saying it so he could get me to work for him and help me that way. After I spent a whole day with then I realized they really need help over there. I had no idea the diner was so busy. You and I always come at the end of the shift when all the customers have left. They'll need at least two more people and if our future doesn't go as planned, they'll need me too."

"I'm sure you'll be able to help him find the right people. Even though I'm sure our plans will work just how we want, if working with Gianni and Gina is our future, so be it," Michelle smiled.

"When you stop working you'll be coming with me over there. We won't let you cook, of course. We don't want to burn the place to the ground," he grinned and Michelle frowned jokingly, pretending to stab him with her fork.

"You can help Gina with papers and stuff. I think we'll have to help her with those even if our company works out. They're getting old and that place is mine as you know, they officially left it to me. They wanted to split it between me and Robert but he never seemed to be interested in it. Of course, if he changes his mind one day when they're not around, he'll be able to help me with it. He's like my brother, I won't deny him that and neither would Gianni or Gina. But I don't want to go so far in the future."

"Of course we'll help them, they're our family," Michelle smiled, kissing him. "Who knows what will happen in the future with any of us? We should think close ahead for now and think about that later. Gianni and Gina will be around with us for a long time and they'll run their diner, so you shouldn't worry about that already. We'll just help them out with whatever help they need, if we can, regardless of what we do."

"You're so amazing; I love you so much," Tony said and kissed her neck.

"I love you too baby," Michelle replied, leaning her head on his shoulder. "I wonder what Tess and Robert will do when and if they get back. We didn't share e-mails for a while now."

"I know. I hope they'll e-mail us soon, so we know they're alright."

"I'm sure they're fine, baby. You know them; they run all over the place and forget to call and mail us. They'll be fine and I'm sure we'll talk to them and see them soon."

"You're right. They're probably having a time of their life as usual, not thinking they should mail us."

"Yeah, probably. We'll have a full detailed version when they get back; especially from Tess."

"Oh, I don't doubt that," Tony laughed. "Last time we talked Robert told me that he's opening his own company online and that he'll come to LA where he'll have the head office. He didn't even tell me what kind of business it is."

"That's Robert for you. Tess is the one you should ask for details, but she and I didn't talk about that last time we talked. She told me they want a baby."

"A baby? Them?"

"Yeah, she says they traveled around the world enough with her parents; that she finally wants to settle down and have a family. She doesn't want to work only anymore, and from what I understood neither does Robert. So, I take it we'll be aunt and uncle soon."

"If we don't become parents first," Tony said.

Michelle smiled at the idea. "I can't wait, but it will take us almost two years before start working on a baby. Remember what we planned."

"I remember; everything has to run smoothly first with our company or with whatever we'll do. And we should build the nursery before you get pregnant; we don't want you inhaling all those fumes from paint and stuff. It's bad enough that you'll have to do it like this, but it will be even worse while you're pregnant and sensitive. It won't be good for you or our baby."

"You already worry about it all; I'm not even pregnant yet and that's so far ahead." Michelle gently caressed his face, "I love you so much. You're right, with that and with everything else we have to do, the time will fly and we'll be parents in no time."

"Yeah, I can't wait. I love you too baby," Tony smiled kissing her cheek.

They remained hugged for a while, not saying anything; enjoying the view and the food.

"We talked about me enough; how was your day?"

"Files, files, files and then some more files," Michelle replied.

"Awww, I think you'll need that massage as much as I will," Tony said, putting his arm around her and gently massaging her arm, giving her goose bumps this time. "Oh yeah; I can't wait either," she kissed him gently on the lips.

"I told Bill I'll be leaving in 3 months," Michelle continued later, after they ate quietly for a while.

"I bet he wasn't happy."

"No, he wasn't, but I couldn't care less what they want. I can't wait to leave."

"I can't wait for you to leave either."

"Sooner I leave, sooner our future will start."

"You have no idea how excited I am about it."

"I'm excited too. It will be different, but I know it will be great because we'll be together," she smiled.

"Yeah, it will be amazing," Tony replied, kissing her.

Soon they were done with their meal and the waiter came to take the plates away and bring them coffee and dessert. They sat there for a while, holding each other and enjoying their evening together.

Some time later Tony and Michelle slowly walked towards the grocery store, holding hands tightly again.

"I'm so glad we can eat dinner and breakfast together, because I miss our lunches. I know we eat them together during the weekend and we're together most of the day but I still miss them."

"I miss them too," Tony kissed her hand.

"It used to be the brightest part of my working day. I loved going to lunch with you and be with you even if it was for only one hour. It felt great to have a break and to be just a normal couple and not agents for that hour. It would make our working hours seem shorter; now the whole day seems longer."

"I know; it seems too long for me too. I'll think of something to change that," he smiled.

"I hope you do, though I don't know what can be done about it. We both work, in separate places…"

"Oh, you should know by now that I don't give up so easily when it comes to spending more time with you," he grinned.

"I know sweetheart and I'm sure you'll think of something," Michelle smiled, kissing him, "if anyone can, it's you."

Couple of minutes later they got into the grocery store and bought what they needed, enjoying doing it together again. When they were done shopping, they loaded all their bags into their car and drove home.

They arrived home half an hour later and went to put the groceries away. When he was done placing all the groceries into the fridge, Tony turned around and looked at Michelle who was turned with her back to him while placing the last things in the cabinet. Tony couldn't keep his eyes off of her; he kept thinking how amazing his wife was and how lucky he was to have her. When she placed the last thing in the cabinet, Tony decided to show her just how much he worships her. He took a step closer to her; when she closed the cabinet door, Michelle turned around and gasped in surprise as he picked her up and lifted her in his arms, sitting her on the counter.

Tony wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him, "I love you so much. I can't stop being thankful from the moment I wake up till the moment I fall asleep for having you in my life. You're my whole life and nothing matters to me without you. This time nothing will keep us apart sweetheart, nothing. This time we'll be together forever," he said looking into her eyes, as he gently stroked her and kissed her all over, sending waves of goose bumps through her body with each loving touch.

"I love you too sweetheart, so much. I can't be thankful enough for having you in my life either. You're everything to me, and I couldn't be happier for being able to spend the rest of my life with you," Michelle replied wrapping her legs tightly around him, pulling him even closer to her, as close as possible.

She gently cupped his face for a long and passionate kiss. Their lips didn't separate until they both needed air.

"Time for our desserts," Tony said huskily.

Kissing her one more time; he lifted his wife off the counter and carried her to their bed.


	13. Chapter 13

**Author note:** _Thanks for all the reviews. New ones are always appreciated._

Two days later Michelle was on her way to the cafeteria; she was just about to leave her office when her phone rang.

"Hey beautiful," she heard her husband on the other end. "Hey, handsome," Michelle replied lovingly.

"Where are you?"

"I was just about to go get some lunch. You called me a bit earlier today. Is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine baby, don't worry your pretty little head," he said softly. "I just wanted to catch you before you get your lunch."

"Why, baby? What's going on?"

"Nothing that should make you worry, in any way. In fact, everything is perfect. Look outside the window."

Michelle finally got what's going on and her heart jumped for joy. She looked outside to see her husband with a basket smiling to her.

"Come down," he said, blowing a kiss to her.

"I'm on my way," she replied.

A few minutes later Michelle was in her husband's arms. They kissed happily, holding each other tightly.

"What are you doing here, sweetheart? Aren't you working?"

"Yeah, I am. I finished arranging the storage room, so I didn't have too much to do. It's pretty quiet there now and they don't need me. It will get much busier in about two hours since people seem to show up at weird hours for some reason. I usually eat my lunch together with Gianni and Gina about an hour from now. I told them I wanted to go on my break earlier, so I could eat with you because I missed our lunches. They told me I could go since they don't need me now anyway but later; they know how much I miss being with you. I had to promise to bring you to the diner more often though. I told them I would, so now we have to go eat there more. I hope you don't mind," he said jokingly since he knew she didn't mind.

"Well, I'll have to cancel my other appointments…" Michelle smiled. "And tell all my secret admirers I won't be able to go with them and…"

"Oh, you…" Tony laughed and tickled her, making her giggle.

"I miss the two of them anyway," Michelle said after she stopped giggling. "I go less than I want to because of work. I'd love to go there more often. We could go eat there each weekend and we could find some time during the week too."

"Hey, let's not push it," Tony joked, "I have other plans with you on weekends."

Michelle wrapped her arms around his neck, "Oh, I wouldn't jeopardize those," she smiled, kissing his nose. "I'm sure we'll figure out some arrangement that will suit both us and them. Listen, even though I could stay like this during the entire lunch hour, let's go eat. I'm starving."

"So am I. Good thing Division has this park so we don't have to drive somewhere else to find a nice quiet place for our lunch. This way we don't lose time."

"Yeah, it's a beautiful park, but mostly empty. People from in there like coming to this park as much as they like eating," Michelle joked, rolling her eyes. Tony laughed, kissing her.

They found a nice, private spot surrounded with shrubs, so they were completely alone. Tony spread the blanket and they both sat down.

"You'll be happy to know that Gina made you her meatloaf when she heard how bad they feed you here."

"Yum, I'm so glad. I love her meatloaf."

Tony laughed and handed her portion of food. He looked at her happily as she started eating her meal with obvious pleasure.

"I'm so happy to see you eating with so much appetite again. You looked so weak while I was in prison and from time to time during the past months while all our problems and nightmares bothered you. You look better every day and I'm so happy about it. It's so good to see you enjoying life again, the way you used to. I'll be feeding you and taking care of you for as long as I live. I was worried sick about you and I don't want to see you like that ever again," he gently caressed her face.

"Oh honey, you don't have to worry about that. I was like that because you know I can't sleep when you're not with me, and I can't eat when I'm nervous or worried. The time behind us was rough, but we're together and we will be forever. Our nightmares aren't as frequent lately and our problems are getting slowly solved; our life is going back to normal more and more every day. There's no reason for me to ever be miserable again." Michelle took his hand, kissed its palm and leaned it back on her face.

"Good," he smiled. "You have to eat and take care of yourself, no matter what's going on. Your iron is very poor; it doesn't take much for it to drop. I constantly worry about you and I know you don't like me to worry."

"I know baby; I know. I hate when you worry, but you'll never have to worry about that again, especially about eating. Nothing will stop me from enjoying your cooking, so you'll have plenty of opportunities to spoil me with it; all 3 of you will. I don't even worry about gaining weight thanks to our bedroom gymnastic," Michelle giggled.

"Always happy to help," Tony grinned.

"Besides, I love when you're pampering me and I know how much you love doing it. You can do it whenever you want and make sure I take care of myself by your standards."

"You can count on it. I'll take care of you for as long as I live," Tony placed his arm around her and pulled her close to him, kissing her hair. "I love you so much."

"I love you so much baby and don't think I won't take care of you," she smiled, "because I'm as worried about you."

"I know you are and I know you will take care of me baby, like you always do, but promise me you won't cook for me," Tony grinned.

Michelle tickled him, making him jump in surprise, "fell lucky that we're out here or you'd get much more. However, you won't escape me; you'll pay for that one when we come home," she laughed.

"I can't wait," Tony replied, kissing her neck.

The rest of the lunch hour Tony and Michelle spent eating happily. The food tasted even better because they got to eat it together. They didn't stop acting like two love birds throughout their time together. Tony walked Michelle back to Division when their meal was finished.

"See you in a few hours, sweetheart."

"Thanks for the wonderful lunch. I'm so happy we can do it, at least from time to time."

"From time to time? And where would I be spending it the other days?"

"What?"

"Didn't I tell you? I'll be coming here every lunch hour for the next 3 months. I have my free lunch hour and I want to spend it with you. It's totally fine with them."

"Are you sure? I know you don't want them giving you more then they already do and you guys eat later than I do here. I don't want you feeling guilty for doing this, no matter how much I love it."

"Yes, I'm sure; it's not only an hour with the two of them. We have almost 3 free hours each afternoon, while there are 5 guests tops in the diner, if that much. I can go an hour earlier if I want because they don't need me during those hours anyway. They said they'll tell me if they need me so I won't come on those days. Besides, Gina won't let me stay there anymore during lunch, not after she heard how badly they're feeding you. You know how she is; she treats us both like her kids and wants us both to eat well. Everything is fine, sweetheart, don't worry."

"Great, then I'll be looking forward to lunch every day" Michelle replied happily; she wrapped her arms around his neck and they held each other for a few minutes. "See you later sweetheart," she smiled, kissing him gently.

After that they both went back to work.

During the next months Tony and Michelle were finally happy the way they used to be. Tony decided to stay with Gianni and not look for jobs anymore. He got rejected for everything he applied for, and was sick of it. The only thing that bothered him was Michelle going back to Division each day. Tony couldn't wait to see her during lunch or to pick her up when her shift was done. Each time she walked out of that door, he would worry that something would happen to her. So far nothing did and Tony was so grateful for it each day she'd come back to him. He kept thinking how he would die without her; Michelle was his life and his only reason to keep going.

They decided to start their own business after all and see what would happen, until then he'd stay with Gianni.

Their life wasn't same as it was before that day, but they were both satisfied with the way things were and were looking forward to the future both wanted. In the mean time they were enjoying the life as it was and were happy because they got to spend and enjoy it together.

"The new staff is coming today."

"Yeah, you told me," Michelle replied, getting the milk out of the refrigerator. "You guys finally managed to pick people you like. It took you long time."

"It did, because they don't want to admit they need help. You know how they are, they're so stubborn."

"I know, and they rubbed off on you, during all the years you guys spent together," Michelle laughed. "You're just like them. It takes me ages to change your mind about something."

"Some of it rubbed off on you too," Tony replied; scooping her into his arms before she managed to sit down, making her gasp in surprise, and sat her in his lap. "You're as stubborn as I am and it's yet another thing I love about you," he smiled and removed her bathrobe a bit, kissing her neck and bare shoulders, caressing her back. "You're so beautiful," he kept repeating between the kisses, "and I love you so much."

Michelle gently went with her fingers through his hair and down his neck, as she enjoyed his loving kisses and caresses; her only replies were low sighs of pleasure. She cupped his face and looked deeply into his eyes, "I love you too, so much," she whispered, before kissing him passionately.

Tony and Michelle remained hugged like that for a few minutes, kissing and caressing. They wanted to remain that way for hours, but had to go to work; separating reluctantly, they resumed with their breakfast.

"I think it's hard for them to bring anyone new. Gianni and Gina are used to four of us; we're the only people they want close and they don't want anyone else around," Michelle continued their previous conversation.

"I know. You and I can't be there for them all the time or work for them forever, and even if Tess and Robert come back, they won't be able to do it all the time either. Gianni and Gina need to accept they're not as young and could use some help at the diner. I told them the new people won't be there all the time. Andrew and Marie are there to help them wash the dishes, clean the entire diner and deal with supplies. It's only for a few hours a day and I promised them I won't abandon them either. I just don't know why I keep feeling guilty about it all."

"Baby, you did the best you could. You shouldn't fell guilty or worry about anything. You're helping them as much as you can and you know I will too. We'll never abandon them, but you and I will start working on our new company soon and once we get everything ready, you'll leave; we told them that when you started working for them. We both want it so much and we should try it. We can't stay with them forever and forget our dream, no matter how much we love them."

"They know that and they won't stop us; they want us to be happy. It's just hard for them to accept changes, but they will and everything will be fine."

"I'm sure it will," Michelle smiled. "And besides, if our company doesn't work for some reason, we can always work for them, I won't mind. But you guys will have to teach me how to cook," she winked.

"That will take us forever," Tony grinned.

Michelle got up and started tickling him; Tony burst into laughter and tried to fight her off but when he realized he couldn't, he gave up and started tickling her too. Both were laughing so hard that after some time they needed air. Michelle sat into Tony's lap again and they looked into each other's eyes happily.

"Everything will work out great, don't worry. I'm sure they'll like the new people you picked. They won't work full time anyway, only 3 days a week and before you leave they'll only come for a few hours a day. The three of you will have plenty of time to get to know them better and change them if you don't like the way they do their job. You'll be working for them for at least 6 more months. We'll visit every day when our business starts, and help them with the books, with orders and with whatever they need," Michelle smiled, "so stop worrying, sweetheart."

"You're right, I shouldn't worry; everything will be fine. It's just… they're like my parents and I want them to be happy."

"I know they're like your parents, they're like mine too. Gianni and Gina are happy and should feel lucky for getting the best son they could ever hope for. You're the most incredible man on Earth; we're all lucky and blessed to have you in our lives. I love you so much," she looked at him lovingly and kissed him softly. "Stop worrying my angel, everything will be fine, we'll make it all work, you'll see. We're together and there's nothing we can't handle together."

"You're the sweetest, most beautiful angel and I love you so much; more than I'll ever be able to put in words," Tony replied, kissing her gently, caressing her face lovingly. "I'm the lucky and blessed one to have such a perfect wife. I'll never know what I did to deserve you."

"I'll never know what I did either," she said, hugging him tightly. "I still can't believe I get to keep you, especially after all the hell we've been through."

"I can't believe it either, and this time nothing will separate us."

They held each other tightly without saying anything for a few moments.

"Even though I want to remain in your arms all day, we should get going or we'll be late for work."

"Yeah, let's go," Tony replied.

He got up and without letting her out of his tight embrace, carried her to the bedroom where they both got ready to go to work.

Over the course of the next few weeks Tony helped Gianni get used to the new workers. They were quite good and Tony was happy with himself for picking them. Even though he was used to hiring people from his days in CTU, these were even more special to him since the diner meant a lot to him.

"Nice job you two," Tony said to Marie and Andrew. "You're doing a great job and it's good to have you."

"Thanks for hiring us," Marie said, "We love working here."

"I'm glad you both enjoy it. You're great workers and when my wife and I open our company, you'll come to help us with it too."

"We'll be more than happy," Andrew said.

"That way you'll have full salaries by working here half the week and working there the other half, but that won't happen in a while."

"It will be great if it works out that way one day."

"I'm sure it will; I'll need someone to help me and not just at the beginning, but all the time. My wife and I will handle the main things and we won't need help with that. I need someone I can trust and that's where you guys will come in. Your help will be similar as it is here."

"We'll be more than happy to help," Marie said. "We both wish we could meet your wife, you talk so nicely about her and each time you mention her, you smile."

Tony smiled thinking about Michelle, "I can't help it; she's my life. You guys will like her a lot, she's incredible. She wants to meet you too, but she works a lot and when she's free you're not here, but you'll meet sooner or later. Speaking of my wife, it's getting late and I have to go pick her up. Here are your paychecks."

"Thanks. We should get going too. We're going to spend couple of days with Marie's parents, and it's a long drive."

"See you next week."

"See you next week, Tony. Bye."

"Bye."

Since Gina and Gianni had to go visit some friends, they decided to close the diner for the day. Tony got inside and locked the door. He then went to talk to Gianni and Gina before going to pick his wife up.

"They're really nice, aren't they?"

"Yeah, they are." Gina replied. "Both Gianni and I like them. You picked good people, Tony. Thanks for putting so much effort into it."

"You don't have to thank me. This place is mine too, isn't it? And I'll always take care of it and the two of you. Just because I might not be working for you guys forever, it doesn't mean Michelle and I will abandon you. You're our family."

"We know that Tony and it means so much to us. You have no idea how happy we are to know we can count on you both. Thanks."

Tony smiled, "Stop thanking me, that's what families do and there's no need to thank either of us; we love helping you with whatever we can. Besides, you guys are always there for us and we always know we can count on you too. Like I said, you're our family. We'll always be together and there for each other. Now, I better go, I have to go pick Michelle up."

"Say hi to her for us. We miss her here; you better bring her soon or else…," Gina smiled.

"I will, don't worry. Tomorrow is Saturday; I'll bring her over for sure."

"Good," Gianni said, "see you both tomorrow then."

"See you guys."

Half an hour later Tony was in front of Division, waiting for his wife.

A few minutes later Michelle came out and walked over to Tony, hugging him tightly.

"I'm so tired; this job isn't what it used to be. When you were there with me, I didn't mind working so many hours, in fact I loved it. Now all I want is for my shift to end so I can be back in your arms. I can't wait for these months to end, so I can work with you and be with you all day."

"It will happen soon sweetheart," Tony replied, kissing her. "I figured you might be tired, so we won't go to the mall today. We'll go buy groceries and everything we need tomorrow. Our dinner is already ready and I'll make you a nice warm bubble bath in the Jacuzzi."

Michelle kissed him, "sounds great, but only if you join me. You know how much I hate going into it without you. It's no fun if you're not by my side."

"I think I'll find a way to join you," he grinned. "The last thing I want is for you to be unhappy," he whispered into her neck, sending goose bumps down her back.

"Let's go home, baby."

"Let's go."

The next few weeks went by the same way for them. They were both happy to be together and busy with their jobs. Tony felt lucky to be with Gianni and Gina because he knew if someone else had taken him, he wouldn't be as happy, especially not without Michelle. He was also glad that he had something that kept him busy for a good part of the day, because it helped to keep his mind off the thing that was bothering him the most. His constant fear for her and her safety didn't let him be complete at peace and he couldn't talk to her about it, not yet anyway, because he knew it was irrational and he didn't want to bother her.

Michelle was quite happy because she could see how much working helped her husband; it was obvious how much happier he was. She knew he was still worried about her going to Division, but she decided not to talk to him about it because she knew that even though it's irrational, it's stronger than him, so she left it alone for the time being. Michelle couldn't wait to leave either; she was tired of her job without him. Even though she knew it was as irrational as his fear she was also scared that something might happen while she was still there and that she would end up losing him somehow thanks to it.

Since nothing happened so far and everything seemed to be going the way it should, both were happy and enjoyed their life together.

One sunny Saturday Tony and Michelle walked hand in hand into the shopping mall.

Tony was sure he was going nuts because he could swear he noticed Aaron and Martha. They told him they were going to Aaron's parents this time, so he didn't think he'd see them there.

"What is it baby?" Michelle asked when she noticed his expression.

"Nothing, I'm just going insane. I see people from work even when I'm not working."

"What?"

"I could swear Andrew and his wife Marie walked into that store just a few minutes ago."

"You mean the young couple, red headed woman and blond tall man?"

"Sounds like them. Did you see them too?"

"I don't know how they look since I didn't meet them yet, but I noticed the couple going in because I wanted to go into the same store."

"Well, let's go. That way you'll buy what you need and I'll see if it's them, or someone looking like them, or else you can have me committed."

Michelle laughed, kissing his cheek.

They walked into the store and Tony saw the couple. When they turned around he was happy to see that the couple was Andrew and Marie.

"Hey, you two."

"Hey, Tony."

"What are you guys doing here? I thought you went to Andrew's parents."

"Yeah, we are; we're going tonight. We didn't feel like driving last night, so we decided to stay home and go today. We just came in here to buy couple of things before we go."

"I'm glad, because now you can finally meet the person around which my life revolves. Andrew, Marie, meet my wonderful wife, Michelle." He placed his arm tightly around Michelle's waist and smiled to her. "Michelle, these are our new employees, Andrew and Marie."

Michelle shook their hands. "It's nice to finally meet you. I heard so much about you. I feel like I know you already."

"We heard so much about you too. All three of them talk about you all the time and Tony always smiles when he mentions you. I doubt he stops thinking about you for a second. He misses working with you."

"I miss working with him too," Michelle smiled and kissed her husband's cheek, "but soon I will be again. Tony told me you guys do an amazing job in the diner. I hope one day, when we open our company, you'll help us with it too. We won't need a lot of help, but like my husband already told you, half week in the diner and half with us in our store will be great."

"We would be delighted to work for you. Your husband is a great boss and we like Gianni and Gina too, even though they didn't seem to be too delighted to see us around at first."

"Yeah, they weren't because they're used to having only 4 people in their lives. It's been that way for ages now and change is difficult for them. It takes them time to adjust. They seem to like you more and more, both talk nicely about you so I think you've been accepted. Haven't they, baby?"

"Yep, they have," Tony smiled.

"We're pleased to hear that since we enjoy working there so much. It's great that we finally met you, Mrs. Almeida."

"Please, call me Michelle."

"Michelle… We're looking forward to work with you one day."

"I'm looking forward to it too," Michelle smiled.

"We better go, we have to get more things and my parents are expecting us."

"Okay, have a pleasant journey and see you on Monday."

"See you on Monday," Andrew replied.

They walked out of the store a few minutes later while Tony and Michelle remained inside browsing for the supplies they needed.

"They seem really nice, baby; just like you described them."

"Yeah, they are. I interviewed ton of people but I liked the two of them the best. I'm glad I wasn't wrong."

"Of course you weren't. What have I been telling you all a long? You know how to pick people; you hired so many during your time at CTU. I know how much the diner means to you and I how important picking the right people for it was for you, but you have to learn to trust yourself again. If you start trusting yourself half as much as I trust you, you'll be fine," Michelle caressed his face. "It's obvious that you were right about these two, and from what I could see in these few minutes, they seem great and I'm sure they'll be great in helping us too."

""Where would I be if I started trusting myself as much as you do?" Tony smiled, kissing the top of her nose. "I'm sure they'll do great too. We should get the rest of the things we need. Gianni and Gina are expecting us. They complain all the time about not seeing you enough, so we have to go. I don't want to drive to the diner because I really want to walk on the beach with you, and I'm already hungry."

"Well, we can't have that," Michelle patted his stomach lovingly. "Want to get a snack before we go?"

"Hmmm… That's tempting. I'm really hungry. You sure wore me out this morning," he grinned.

"Well, what can I do? It's your own fault. You're so hot that I just can't let you go," she winked. "Besides, I didn't hear you complaining."

"You never will," Tony replied, kissing her softly. "We could eat something; I'm sure it won't spoil our appetites."

"Oh, I know it won't. Let's find something to eat and then we'll keep shopping. When we're done, we can drop it all off at home, leave the car and go for our walk. No matter how much we eat, by the time we reach the diner we'll be hungry again."

"Sounds like a plan," Tony replied.

They did exactly as planned.

The next few weeks went by in the same tone. Tony and Michelle spent every free moment together, enjoying their love and their life together. The rest of the time they worked and excitingly waited when they'd finally be able to start their long awaited future.


	14. Chapter 14

Author note: Thank you for your reviews

**Author note:** _Thank you for your reviews. I'd love to know what you think about the whole story, so new ones are always appreciated._

The final weekend before Michelle's last week at work arrived quickly. It started with a rainy Saturday.

Michelle woke up on top of Tony; she felt the cool air going over her bare back. Even though it was mid summer, the weather had been unusual as of late. The night before was warm so they left the window opened before going to bed. However, the temperature had dropped because clouds gathered during the night; the rain was pouring again and wind was blowing. Thanks to all of that it was fairly cool in their home.

Michelle got up and closed the window. Shivering, she returned to their bed and lay down in the same position, on top of her husband. She was just about to cover herself when Tony did it for her. He didn't wake up, but tugged the sheet higher, covering her back before wrapping his arms tightly around her.

Michelle smiled and looked at her husband's sleeping face. She gently traced it with her fingers, kissing his lips gently. "I love you so much," she whispered.

"I love you too baby," Tony replied without fully waking up.

Michelle remained looking at him for a while, gently caressing his face every now and then; planting kisses on it. After some time, she dosed off again.

When she woke, Michelle felt his strong arms still around her; one was going up and down her back and the other was playing with her curls. Michelle was still groggy, so she didn't open her eyes right away; letting her husband caress her for a bit longer as she rested with her head on his chest. A few minutes later Michelle was fully awake. When she heard him whisper, "I love you," she looked up and smiled, surprising him, "I love you too, so very much."

"Hey, I didn't know you were awake."

"I fully woke up a few seconds ago."

"I hope I didn't wake you."

"No, baby, you didn't. I was awake before, but I obviously dosed off again."

"Why did you wake up? Did you have a nightmare?"

"No, I was cold."

"Cold?"

"Yeah," Michelle nodded and told him what happened couple of hours ago.

"I had no idea. I don't remember any of it."

"I know you don't. You were asleep but you still took care of me," she smiled, kissing his lips gently.

"I'll always take care of you," he replied, gently tucking couple of loose curls behind her ear. "So, what do you want to do today?"

"I don't want to set foot outside our house. I want to spend the entire day in your wonderful strong embrace. I want to feel your skin covering mine all day."

"I think that can be arranged," he grinned. "We do have to get up and eat."

"Yeah, but we're coming right back in here when we finish eating, where we'll stay until we get hungry again. Then we'll go eat and come back in here," she smiled. "I don't want to do anything else all day; all I want is to spend the entire day in your arms."

"Sounds perfect."

They remained laying in bed for a while, cuddling. After getting up and dressed they went into the kitchen where Tony made them breakfast.

When they finished their breakfast, Michelle got up and sat into Tony's lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he hugged her tightly.

"I love weekends. I finally don't have to hurry to work and neither do you. I get to spend the entire day with you, for a change, just like I want to do every day for the rest of my life."

"I don't want anything else either. I'm glad Gianni and Gina don't need me to go to the diner during the weekend. I was sure they'd need me more then, but they don't. For some reason the weekend traffic at the diner is much slower than it is during the week."

"You have no idea how glad I am too. If you did, we wouldn't even have these two free days."

"Yeah, but only one week left and then we'll go up to the cabin for a while, swim in the lake and walk around the forest. Robert and Tess are away and since no one else has access to our cabin, it will be just you and me alone, without anyone for miles."

"Mmm, sounds wonderful," Michelle kissed him. "I'm so glad you and Robert built that cabin when you were younger. I love going up there."

"I love it too, I proposed to you up there on our first visit and each time we found time to go was wonderful."

"It sure was. That place is amazing, no matter what season it is."

"Yeah, it's great. One day the four of us will bring our kids up there. I'm sure they'll love it as much."

"I'm sure they will, sweetheart."

They kissed for a while, holding each other tightly.

"When we come back you'll be coming to the diner with me during the week, so we'll be together all the time again. We'll also start handling everything that we'll need to open our business," Tony said slowly swinging her side to side.

"I can't wait," she smiled.

"I can't wait either. I've been waiting to tell you something that will make you happy. I found a perfect spot for our store. It's really close to the diner, which is great since that way it's not far from our home either, and I can help the two of them if they need something."

"That's great sweetheart, when and where did you find it?"

"You know the spot; we pass by it almost every day on our way to the diner. It's that yellow two story building with two stores on the first floor. It's been closed for a while now and I heard it will be on sale soon."

"Really? That place would be a perfect location for our store. I always liked that building; it has lot of room on the lower floor for the store and for offices and such on the upper floor. I was thinking just the other day when we passed by it how great it would be to have something similar for our store. Remember, we even talked about it."

"I remember; that's why I was so excited when I heard it would be going on sale soon. How great would it be if we manage to get it, huh?"

"Yeah, baby; it would be. Just don't get overly excited in case something goes wrong with it. Who knows, maybe they gave up on the sale; maybe they have already decided who will buy it, maybe… There are ton of maybes, so don't get disappointed if it fails," she looked into his eyes, caressing his face.

Tony kissed her, "I won't sweetheart. I was thinking the same thing, since it's separated in two stores and we need only one, maybe they'll try selling the whole thing to someone who needs two. It would still be great none the less, but in case it fails, we'll find something else. I'm sure there are ton of other different locations that would suit us."

"Yeah, I'm sure there are," Michelle smiled.

A few seconds later thunder ripped through their house and rain started pouring twice as hard.

"Good thing we bought all our groceries last night. It wouldn't be too exciting to go out in this weather."

"No, it sure wouldn't be. You should call Gianni and Gina and tell them that we won't be coming there today. Tell them we'll come tomorrow for a change."

"You're right; I don't feel like going out in weather like this and besides," Tony got up with her still in his arms, "we have other plans," he said, kissing her neck.

He carried her to their favorite armchair which they brought from his old apartment. They first sat in it together on her first visit to his place after a difficult mission which had gone terribly wrong. Michelle didn't feel like being alone and Tony didn't feel like leaving her, so he brought her to his place and took care of her. They spent hours cuddling in that armchair, needing to feel each other close.

Tony sat them down in the armchair, keeping Michelle in his lap. She hugged him tightly, getting as close to him as she possibly could. He wrapped his arms around her.

"I know you didn't want us to leave the bed, but I know how much you like sitting here and watching the storms over the ocean and so do I. We can't get out on the porch since it is pouring, but this is the second best place to look at the ocean."

"Yeah, it sure is. I loved this armchair from the first time we sat in it together. It's just perfect, as if it was made for the two of us. It's not too big so we have to get totally close if we want to sit together, and not so small that it makes us uncomfortable."

"I love it too although I'm so glad I don't have to worry about you more than usual today. Since nothing bad happened to you and you didn't come close to dying like on the day we sat here together for the first time. I was so scared for you on that day. Good thing you had that vest on or I would've lost you," he said hugging her even tighter.

"Oh baby, that day still scares you. Even though it was a horrible mission and I got shot at multiple times, it all went well. I was wearing a vest and the bullets hit it. I was bruised, but I got out safely and you took care of me. It happened ages ago honey; you didn't lose me and you won't lose me so easily. I'm right here where I'll always be."

"You have no idea how glad I am because of that," Tony kissed her hair. "I know it happened a long time ago and it's silly to think about it now. I guess I remembered all the fear again thanks to the horrible time behind us and because you still work there. I'll always remember it though; that was the first time I got scared for you, the first time I realized how much I don't want to lose you, and we were going out for only a month."

Michelle smiled, kissing him.

"You meant the world to me even back then. I was sick with worry while you were on that mission and afterward while I took care of you. I spent the entire night looking at you while you slept, making sure you were okay. Even back then I thought about leaving CTU one day to keep you safe. However, everything was going so well for us after that event, we both just put it behind us," Tony continued.

"Yeah, and we had great 3 years. If that stupid day hadn't happen the way it did, we wouldn't want to leave it all so much, we'd still be there. Well, there or in Langley, but we would still be in the same field."

"That's true, but somehow I'm grateful that it all happened. Too many bad things happen to people in that world and I want to be free of it and as far away from it as possible. This way we will be and we'll start our own business. It will be safe for us both, so neither of us will have to worry for the other. We'll be our own bosses; we'll have more free time to be together. No one will be able to put us in any kind of difficult situation. We'll be able to raise a family and build our business in peace."

"I'm glad it will all happen, but I wouldn't complain if it happened in a different way," Michelle sighed. "I never want to go through anything similar to the hell we went through during that time," she said leaning her head on his shoulder, hugging him tighter, "never."

"I don't want to go through anything similar again either and we won't, not this time. This last week has to go by smoothly and then we'll be free from that life and that sort of fear. I never want to worry about losing you again."

"I never want to worry about losing you either. Only this week and we'll finally be free," Michelle looked up and they shared a kiss.

"Now, call Gina and Gianni so we can let them know we'll come tomorrow. I want to spend the entire day concentrated on just you and me without anyone around us."

"You got it baby," Tony smiled.

He picked up the phone and called Gianni and Gina. Tony placed them on the speakerphone because they wanted to talk to Michelle too. After explaining that they didn't feel like going out due to the bad weather and just wanted to spend a day alone, Tony and Michelle promised they'd come to see them tomorrow.

When they finished the conversation, Tony wrapped his arms tightly around his wife again.

They remained in their armchair for a long time, kissing and cuddling, looking at the ocean raging under the wind and lightning ripping through the sky followed by strong claps of thunder.

"Are you hungry?" Tony asked after some time.

Michelle just nodded and got up; she looked at him and took his hands, lifting him to his feet, pulling him close to her. She gently caressed his back, kissing his neck, sending waves of goose bumps down his back with each loving kiss and touch.

"I'm hungry for you," she whispered seductively, nuzzling his ear, "I want to feel you and taste you." His only reply was a long moan of pleasure, as she continued to kiss his neck and caress him gently, in a way only she knew how.

She led him to their bed, gently pushing him down onto his back. Getting him completely naked, she climbed on top of him; kissing and caressing his entire body for a long time. Michelle knew she was driving him insane; it was obvious how much he was enjoying it all, and she loved every minute of it. Making her husband feel good was as pleasurable for her as it was for him.

When Tony couldn't handle it anymore, he gently flipped her onto her back. He looked at her with eyes filled with passion. "My turn," Tony said, kissing her hungrily.

He slowly took the rest of her clothes off, kissing all the naked parts. Once he got her completely naked, Tony hovered over his wife and started planting gentle kisses all over her body, stroking her gently in the process. He drove her as insane with his long, passionate kisses and caresses. Placing her hands onto his head, Michelle gently tugged his hair, "come up," she barely managed to whisper.

Tony took his time to reach her lips; when he finally did, they kissed hungrily for a long time, caressing each other all over. Their lips didn't separate until they ran out of air.

They looked deeply into each other's eyes which were reflecting the other's love and desire.

"I want to feel you inside me," Michelle whispered seductively in his ear.

Tony wanted her as much; he kissed her lustfully as he eased himself gently into her.

Their lovemaking was slow and passionate. Tony and Michelle continued whispering loving words to one other; never breaking the eye contact, their skin constantly covered the other.

Afterward they lay breathless for a long time; wrapped tightly in each other's arms, enjoying the afterglow of their lovemaking.

Some time later when they finally caught their breath, Tony was lying with his head on Michelle's stomach as she gently stroked his hair. He looked into her eyes and smiled, "Are you hungry now?"

"Oh yeah," she replied, "I could eat an elephant."

"I don't think we have elephants in the fridge," Tony chuckled, "but I'm sure I can make us something that will kill our hunger."

"For food anyway," Michelle giggled.

Tony lifted himself to her face, "the other hunger will never be killed. Hunger for food will always be more easily taken care of. I'll never stop being hungry of you."

"Neither will I," Michelle replied.

"It might not feel as strong at the moment, but soon it will," he said, burying his face into her neck, kissing it fiery, sending goose bumps down her back, making her sigh of pleasure.

"Keep that up and we won't come out of here till the end of the millennium," she smiled, gently stroking his back. "Not that you'll hear me complaining, but we have to get some fuel first."

"Well, let's get tanked up," Tony replied.

They kissed for a few more minutes and then got up; after they finished getting dressed they went into the kitchen.

"What do you want to eat?" Tony asked.

"I don't care, I'm so hungry that I could cook and then eat what I cooked."

"You must be starving in that case," Tony laughed, wrapping his arms around her.

"You're so funny," Michelle replied, frowning jokingly. Surprising him, she tickled his ribs, making him jump.

"I'll get you for this later." Tony replied laughing. "But first I have to feed us both, so we have enough energy."

"You better," Michelle smiled. "Then you can get me anyway you want," she whispered in his ear.

Tony's only reply was a hungry kiss on her lips. They looked lovingly into each other's eyes for a few moments before they went to prepare their meal.

Twenty minutes later their lunch was done and they ate happily flirting.

When they finished their lunch, Tony and Michelle cleaned everything up and decided to watch TV for a while.

They curled up next to each other on the couch and picked up the TV guide from the coffee table, trying to decide what to watch. A few minutes later Tony turned the TV on and just as he started skipping to the channel they picked, the phone rang.

"Hello?" Michelle answered.

"Hey, Michelle; it's Jack."

"Jack! It's good to hear you. How are you?"

"I'm great Michelle, and it's enough to hear your voice to know that you're great too."

"Yeah, we're both doing great, we're really happy," Michelle smiled to Tony. "Tony is right here with me, would you like to talk to him?"

"I'd like to talk to you both."

"Okay, I'll put you on the speaker," Michelle said.

"Hey, Jack." Tony said when Michelle placed the phone on the speaker. "We didn't hear a peep out of you for a while now. How is everything with you?"

"It's really good actually. I'm working for Secretary Heller; he's a great man and I'm enjoying the quieter way of working for a change."

"I'm glad you're doing so well. I was sure you'd go nuts doing office work."

"I was sure too, but I'm doing so well. I had no idea it would do me so much good."

"You sound happy."

"I am happy. Life is great for a change."

"I'm glad to hear it. Life couldn't be any better on our side either." Tony smiled, kissing Michelle's cheek. "We have made so many decisions it will take a month to tell you about it all."

"I'd love to hear about it, but you'll tell me everything face to face."

"Face to face?" Michelle asked. "Are you coming to LA?"

"Yeah, I'm coming next week. I'm accompanying Heller and his daughter. It's a business trip but we're staying for a few days and I'll have some free time. I'd love to see you guys."

"That would be great; we'd love to see you too. It's been a while since we last saw each other and so many things changed for the better. It will be my last week at Division; we'll go out and celebrate it together."

"You're leaving Division? You guys really decided to make a lot of changes. I can't wait to hear about it all."

"We can't wait to tell you. There's so much more."

"Well, we'll talk about it all next week. I have ton of news of my own."

"Great, we'll have some catching up to do."

"Yeah; I'll call you when I arrive and we can confirm our dinner then."

"Okay, talk to you soon Jack."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Michelle hung up the phone and snuggled next to Tony again, leaning her head on his chest; he wrapped his arms around her.

"It's so good to hear he's doing well. We were so occupied with our life that we didn't call him in a while and he was obviously as busy since he didn't call us either."

"Yeah, and it's strange not to hear him for such a long time. We used to talk to him daily when you came out of that place. I'm glad to hear him sounding so happy. I don't remember when I heard him sounding this way. He was happy during those three years when I got to know him better, he and Kim became like a family to us. But he never sounded this happy; he sounds like a totally different person."

"I haven't heard him this happy since before Terri died. He used to sound like this all the time. He was a totally different guy back then, at work and outside it. I'm glad he sounds more like that again."

"I'm glad too, he deserves to be happy just like you and I are," Michelle smiled.

"No one is as happy as I am right now. I'm the happiest person alive," Tony said.

"That makes two of us," she replied gently kissing him on the lips. "I love you so much."

"I love you too baby, more than anything."

They kissed for a while, Michelle then nestled her head bellow his collarbone slipping her one arm behind him wrapping it around his back; wrapping the other around his neck, gently stroking its nape. Tony kissed the top of her head leaning his chin on it. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, gently stroking her hair and back. They sat that way for a long time, completely forgetting about TV again, simply enjoying being together.

After dinner Tony and Michelle snuggled next to each other on the couch and watched a movie. Some time later Michelle fell asleep in Tony's arms; he was just about to take her to bed when the phone rang. Tony cursed because he knew it would wake her up.

"Hello. Who is it?"

Michelle opened her eyes and smiled to Tony who gently caressed her face.

"Hellooo?"

"Tony," he heard from a distance. "It's me Robert."

"Robert? Where are you calling me from? Are you okay? You sound like you're in some tunnel."

"I'm fine Tony; I'm on a yacht in the Mediterranean Sea with Tess and her parents. I sound like that because we're out in the open sea and the signal isn't too good. Tess and I just wanted to see how you guys were doing since we didn't talk in a while; we miss you both. We're sorry about not calling you enough or even e-mailing you, so this time we decided to call you and talk to you in person, despite the bad phone reception."

"Yeah, we sure haven't talked like this in a while. I'm glad you guys are okay," Tony said as he placed the phone on the speaker so Michelle could here it all as well. "So much happened to us over the last several months and I'm sure as much happened to the two of you too."

"Yeah, it sure has, but we'll talk soon, in person."

"Really? You're coming home?" Tony asked.

"We are; we'll be in LA in a month or so."

"That's great news," Michelle said.

"We had it with the traveling; we want to come home and open our business there. We miss the two of you and Gianni and Gina too."

"They ask about you guys a lot and miss you too. You should call them; they want to know how you are."

"I don't know when we'll be able to call; we're going out in the open sea and we'll be traveling for a while longer. When you see Gianni and Gina, send them our love and we'll do our best to call soon."

"Yeah, we'll tell them. I see them daily since I work in the diner now, at least for the time being. I'll pass along your greetings."

"Thank you so much Tony. I'm so glad you guys are okay; I know this was a difficult time for you both. You sound so well and I'm so glad to hear that. Our trip happened at a bad time, but there was no way we could have known what was going to occur only a couple of days after we left. We couldn't come back even though we wanted to. You have no idea how worried about you we were. I wish I could've been there more for you. The phone calls and e-mails we exchanged seem like nothing… I'm sorry for not being there for you more. It's not because we don't care about you, I hope you know that."

"I know, it's okay. Of course I know you care about me and how worried you both were even though you tried to hide it, I could hear it in your voices and read it in your mail. You guys don't have to worry about me though. I'm just fine, because all I need is my wife and she was with me every step of the way like she'll always be," Tony caressed Michelle's face and she smiled, kissing his cheek gently.

"You left before it all happened; you couldn't have known it would and I didn't expect you to come back just for me. I wouldn't want you to anyway. There's nothing either of you could've done for me in that situation or later when I got out. I know how much you both looked forward to this and I'm glad you did it. There's no need for you guys to feel bad, I'm great. Everything turned out so well. No matter how hard it was for a while, we got out of it and we're better than ever. When you come back, you'll see. We have so many things planned and we've changed our life so much."

"I'm glad you're doing so well and I can't wait to see you both and hear all about it. Tess and I had such a great time over the past two years. We've been around the world, but we're both tired and we want to finally settle down."

"I'm glad to hear it. I miss you, my brother. I can't wait to see you and Tess. Both of us can't."

"We miss you too, my brother, a lot. We can't wait to see you guys either. There are so many things we want to tell you, but we don't want to do it over the phone."

"Yeah, this reception is getting even worse; we'll talk when you guys come here."

"We will. Did you go by our house? Is it still in one peace?"

"We checked on it just a few weeks ago. Everything is fine and it's all waiting for you."

"It won't wait for much longer anymore. Hang on; Tess wants to say hi to you guys."

"Hey guys."

"Tess! Hey, how are you? You sound so happy."

"I am happy, it's been a great trip, but we can't wait to be home. We have so much to tell you and as I heard you have as much to tell us."

"We sure do, we're so happy that you're coming back and that you're okay."

"We're really sorry for not calling you in such a long time to tell you we're fine. It's been so hectic and something kept getting in way. We were thinking about mailing you and then changed our minds because we wanted to hear you, but it all turned out differently."

"It's okay. We're glad you're okay, we can't wait to see you."

"We can't wait either. This line is breaking up; it's time for us to go. Love you guys, see you soon."

"Love you. See you soon."

Tony hung up the phone and wrapped his arms around Michelle. It was obvious on his face how happy he was to hear from Robert, he's been like a brother to him most of his life and he missed him.

"I'm sorry the phone woke you up, you we're sleeping so peacefully," he said caressing her face.

"It's okay, I got plenty of rest and I'm as good as new again," Michelle smiled.

"Me too, but it's time for us to go to bed anyway."

"I want to stay in your arms like this for a while longer. I'm not tired anymore."

"Okay," Tony kissed her.

"I'm so glad they finally called us."

"I am too, baby."

"They sound well and happy. I'm glad we'll see them soon."

"Me too."

"I wonder what news they've got. We'll be hearing ton of new things in the next few months. First Jack, then them…"

"Yeah, we sure will."

"Things are coming back to the way they used to be. You'll have both Jack and Robert back. One will be here for only couple of days, but you'll still get to see him and sounds like the other will stay for a long time. You'll finally get to talk to them both and I know how much you missed your guy talk."

"I did, but I'm perfectly well the way I am right now."

"So am I."

"I know you missed Tess; you missed chatting with her about your girly things," Tony teased.

"Haha, you're so funny," Michelle tickled him, "but you're right, I did miss her. She became like a sister to me over the years and it will be good to have her back."

"Yeah, even though we're perfectly well on our own, it will be good to see them all."

"It will be," Michelle replied, "and soon you will see them." She started caressing him with her feathery touch, going up and down from his neck to his chest, planting gentle kisses on his neck; sending goose bumps down his spine.

"I will, but the only thing I want to see right now is my wife in our bed, naked" Tony said huskily.

Michelle wrapped her arms around his neck, "and I want to see my husband naked in our bed as well."

They got up from the couch and walked to the bed, slowly taking each other's clothes off on the way.


	15. Chapter 15

Author note: Thank you for all the reviews

**Author note:** _Thank you for all the reviews. New ones are always appreciated. __Sorry about the delay, I was on vacation._

The next morning Michelle turned in their bed to find his side empty. The first thought which came to her mind was all the times she woke up without him; it made her panic so she sat up looking for him.

Her face broke into a huge smile when she saw him in the kitchen preparing their breakfast in his boxer shorts.

Michelle got out of the bed and sneaked from behind him; she kissed the nape of his neck and wrapped her arms around him.

"Hey beautiful," Tony said turning in her arms, "I didn't know you were up. I wanted to bring you your breakfast in bed."

"You know I can't sleep without you," Michelle smiled, kissing the top of his nose. "We can always take the breakfast back in the bed and eat it together."

"Perfect choice," Tony replied.

Separating from their hug a few minutes later they continued to make their breakfast and as planned, when it was done, took it to bed.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Tony asked; feeding Michelle a spoon of corn flakes covered with yoghurt.

"As much as I'd love to stay here all day like yesterday; we promised Gianni and Gina we'd come to see them today," Michelle replied feeding him the same corn flakes.

"I know; we have to go see them today. They've been asking me to bring you all week; they miss you."

"I haven't seen them in a while; I miss them too. I really care about them and I don't want it to seem like we're avoiding them, so we should go. We won't stay for too long and then we'll have the rest of the day to ourselves."

"That will be perfect," Tony smiled, feeding her again.

"I really love spending time with them, but what can I do? I need you so much and I'm happiest when it's just the two of us."

"I'm happiest then too baby. No matter how much I care about the two of them. All I want to do is to be alone with you in my arms, all day and all night long."

Michelle smiled and kissed him before giving him some buttered toast. "That's all I want to do too, with every free second of my time."

For a while Tony and Michelle just ate happily. When they were done with the flakes and toast, Tony and Michelle fed each other the fruit salad. Constantly flirting and kissing each other every now and then.

When they were done Tony placed the food tray on the nightstand and leaned himself on the headboard. Michelle nestled herself in his arms, leaning her head on his chest, and he wrapped his arms around her. They sat like that for a while, enjoying being together.

"It's finally a beautiful day, but it's not warm enough to go swimming. We can go for our walk. Thanks to the darn rain we didn't go in a while."

"I'd love that," Tony replied.

"Good, than it's exactly what we'll do," Michelle smiled, "after a long shower."

Tony and Michelle got up, took the plates in the kitchen, cleaned them up and placed them into the dishwasher. Finishing everything, they walked into the bathroom.

An hour later, Tony and Michelle got out of their house, and were soon walking hand in hand on the beach.

Even though it wasn't as warm as it should be thanks to all the rain that was pouring over the past weeks, it warmed up when the sun came out. They took off their jackets and tied them around their waists.

"I'm so happy because it finally looks like summer is coming back. We'll be able to go swimming and lie around on the beach, getting some sun and spend more time on our back porch; not just during the day, but during the night too. I'm glad we'll finally be able to spend time outside in the first place; stupid rain didn't give us any break."

"Yeah, I'm happy about it too. I miss being outside; I especially miss our dinners on the back porch and down on the beach. We haven't been able to do it for weeks. If I didn't know any better, I'd say it is mid October and not mid August or that we moved to Seattle without knowing it. Thankfully it looks like the darn rain finally stopped."

"It's been a weird summer so far; first it was too hot and now it's too cold. Hopefully it will be the way it usually is from now on and we can get back to our favorite outdoor activities soon."

"Yeah, eating on the back porch and down on the beach is just one of the outdoor activities I'm looking forward too. I'm especially looking forward to our nightly outdoor activities," Tony kissed her.

"Oh you," Michelle blushed.

"I don't know what you think I meant. I just meant that I miss sleeping outside and spending time under the stars," Tony smiled innocently.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd believe you," Michelle laughed, slapping his hand lightly, "but I won't complain when it becomes dry enough again for us to sleep outside. I miss it so much."

"Yeah, I miss it too; it was like a little getaway each time we did it, like a miniature trip."

"It was; I loved it from the first time we did it all those years ago."

"Me too; but I miss the other thing too," he winked.

Michelle just rolled her eyes jokingly. "I miss it too," she whispered, nuzzling his ear. "The first night we slept outside on our part of the beach feels like a lifetime ago."

"It sure does. It was long time ago, only fifteen days after we started dating. First night after I removed that darn cast from my foot."

"You started building our house there soon after that."

"Well, we had to move in somewhere after we got engaged," Tony smiled.

"Yeah, two apartments weren't needed anymore," Michelle replied. "I nearly had a heart attack when you brought me to our house right after we came back from the cabin."

"I wanted it to be an engagement surprise."

"It sure was. I always smile when I remember all of that, how happy we were already; you knew I'd say 'yes'."

"Of course I knew; we both knew we'd never love anyone else again from the start," Tony gently kissed her lips. "Since it was only two months after we started dating, I had a backup plan. If in some weird case you said that you needed more time to think about it, I would've taken us to our separate apartments without telling you about any of it and our house would've waited until you accepted. It was built for us to use it together and no other option ever existed."

"Well, it didn't have to wait, I had no intention of telling you 'no.' I wanted to marry you as much as you wanted to marry me," Michelle smiled. "What we've had from the beginning was more incredible than anything I've ever experienced before. Our first date was better than all my other relationships combined and from the start I knew I'd be spending the rest of my life with you."

"I knew I struck some lucky star from the start too. I felt the same way about our first date; any of my other relationship can hide just behind it. I never felt as good with anyone as I felt with you during our first date and it only keeps getting better and better."

"It sure does."

Tony wrapped his arm around her waist and Michelle leaned her head on his shoulder, putting her arm on the small of his back. They walked silently the rest of the way, kissing gently every now and then; not letting go of each other.

Tony and Michelle reached the dinner 30 minutes later, both Gianni and Gina were there.

"Hey guys," Michelle said the minute they entered.

"Michelle, honey," Gina said, rushing to her, hugging her. "You came at last. Let me look at you."

She moved away from Michelle, holding her hands, measuring her.

"You finally look like your old self again and you look so happy."

"I'm incredibly happy Gina. Life couldn't be better," Michelle smiled.

"You only said 'hi' to her, what about me?" Tony asked, pretending to pout. "Since I started working here no one is happy to see me."

"Of course I'm happy. I'm always happy to see you, my son," Gina said. She came to Tony and hugged him so tightly it knocked the wind out of him, making him cough.

"And you tell me I'll kill the boy by patting him on the back," Gianni laughed, joining them. "Hi kids, it's so good to see you both."

Gianni walked over to Michelle, kissing her cheek, "how are you, honey?"

"I'm great Gianni, really great. I'm sorry for not coming more often, but work's been crazy. I didn't have time to catch a breath and I wanted to spend all the free time I had with my husband. But starting next week, I'll be done with that place and then I'll be coming here every day with Tony."

"We'll alert the fire department and NHS, in case you decide to help us with the cooking," Tony chuckled, causing everyone else to laugh as well.

When she stopped laughing, Michelle slapped his arm lightly; "you'll so pay for that one later," she smiled, kissing his cheek soundly.

"We have great news for you guys," Tony said, putting his arm around Michelle. "Robert called us last night."

"He did, how is he, did you hear from Tess, are they okay?" Gianni and Gina asked in one voice.

"They're both great; they sound so happy. They're traveling on a yacht with Tess's parents; they're in Mediterranean Sea now. They'll be coming home in a month or so."

"They will?"

"Yeah, that's what they said."

"That's great news. We can't wait to see them both."

"We can't wait to see them either," Michelle smiled to Tony.

"You kids hungry?" Gianni asked.

"We're starving. We'll have whatever you have on the menu today. You know how much we love your cooking," Michelle said.

"Since we knew you'd be coming, we made Quattro formaggi, just for you."

"Mmmm, my favorite pizza; you guys shouldn't have cooked just for me. You will spoil me."

"Well of course we cooked just for you, my dear. You're like our kids; we love cooking for and spoiling you. It's no problem, it's our pleasure," Gina said, patting her on the cheek.

"Thanks you guys," Tony and Michelle replied.

"No need to thank us, both Gina and I love it. We also love having you both here," Gianni added.

"We love being here," Tony said, smiling to Michelle who nodded and smiled too.

"Now, come help me get the pizzas Tony; we'll let the girls talk a bit. As you see it is empty here today, so we can all enjoy our meal in peace."

Gianni and Tony went to prepare their meal while Michelle and Gina started setting the table for them to eat.

"I'll have to prepare something fast for us to take before we leave. It would be nice if I could surprise Michelle with it. I want to eat dinner with her on our back porch because we didn't do it in such a long time and we both miss it. Today is exactly 5 years that we declared our love to each other and I want to give her at least this small surprise."

"You don't have to cook. I have ton of cooked food here, I made it all today, so we have some done for tomorrow. All you have to do is pick the food you want and it's yours."

"Great, thanks," Tony smiled. "This will be great. I'll take one of the baskets Gina keeps here to carry the food in it and to hide these irises I bought on Friday; I didn't want her to find them so I left them here especially for tonight. These are the exact same irises I gave her on that night. Only these are in a pot. You know how she is with flowers," Tony's smile widened. "She's crazy about flowers and playing with them relaxes her. My wife only has one more week at Division. If that goes well, we'll be free and happy forever; regardless of what happens with our plans."

"I'm sure everything will go well and the two of you will have the happy future you deserve."

"I truly hope so; all I want is to spend the rest of my life with her in my arms. I don't want anything else. I know everything will be perfect, as long as I have her by my side. She's all I need, she's my life."

"You won't lose her, don't worry. You'll become old and gray together. Like me and Gina."

"That's all we both want," Tony replied.

"It will happen, you'll see," Gianni smiled, patting him on the back. "Come on, I'm sure our girls are getting hungry."

In the meantime Michelle and Gina finished getting the table ready, now they were sitting at the table talking.

"So, what are you and Tony planning to do when you finish working in that horrible place?"

"We're having dinner with Jack on my last day, hopefully. You know how he is. It's impossible to actually make plans with him."

"That boy has to stop running all the time; he'll wear himself out."

"If he stopped, he'd go nuts, but he sounded happy and said he'd be here… so we'll see. You know we're going to the cabin for a while after my last week."

"Yeah, I know. I bet you're looking forward to that."

"I sure am. I love going up there; I missed it all this time. Tony misses it too and it will be good for him to go up there and relax. We're both looking forward to it. This has been a rough period for us, but it looks like it's all finally in the past, where it belongs. It will kind of be the end of every worry for us both. We'll spend 10 days without a single worry in the world. Just him and me," Michelle smiled. "I can see that me working at Division is still bothering him, but it doesn't seem as bad as it used to be. He's probably hiding it from me. We said we won't hide anything from each other ever again, but all he wants is to protect me from any kind of worry, so I'm sure he is."

"Well, of course. The fact that you're still there bothers us all."

"I know," Michelle smiled, patting Gina on the back, "I'll be done soon so we'll all stop worrying. You guys shouldn't worry so much, I'll be fine. We've been doing this job for years now and had only few really rough days."

"I know it seems that way to you and Tony because the two of you love that job, but to Gianni and me, it's a nightmare. Each day you two went to work, we were worried. Now even more since you're on your own. You two are like kids to us and we'd die if something happened to either of you."

"Oh Gina," Michelle hugged her. "We'll be fine. I'll be fine. Don't worry."

"I won't… From next week," Gina smiled. "What are your plans when you come back from the cabin?"

"We'll start taking care of things for our new company."

"How is that going? Tony didn't tell us much; he keeps it all a secret."

"Well, if he's keeping it a secret then I shouldn't say anything either. All I can say is that we already have a lot of things planned and that it's going well so far. When we have it all done, we'll let you guys know."

"Great, I'm sure you'll do well with it."

"I'm sure too. We're both excited about it and I can't wait to work with my husband again."

"I know how much you both miss it."

"Yeah, we do, it's a big part of our relationship. That's how it all started and we miss it. I'll be coming here until it's all done, and then we'll both go and work in our company."

"I can't wait to have you with us all day."

"It should be fun. You could even try to teach me how to cook a bit. Tony is trying, but you know how hopeless I am; I can use all the help I can get."

"It will be my pleasure," Gina said.

"We also have to decorate our house a bit; change some things and add a new room which we'll hopefully turn into two in time. We're planning on having a baby; hopefully two of them."

"Tony mentioned that."

"I can't wait to become a mom, but it will be a while before it actually happens. Though I'm sure it will one day. Then you and Gianni will be grandparents."

Gina smiled widely on that, hugging Michelle. "I can't wait, my dear."

"Last time Tess e-mailed me, a couple of months ago, she mentioned that they decided to have a baby too. She didn't mention it last night, but I doubt they gave up on the idea. You'll be double grandmother in no time."

"That will be great. Either of you won't need a babysitter as long as I'm around."

"We couldn't ask for a better person to look after our kids," Michelle smiled.

"I can't wait to see Tess and Robert. Gianni and I miss them both."

"I can't wait to see them either. Tony and I miss them too. I can't believe that they actually decided to settle down. It will be fun to see how they try to stay in one spot for a long time."

"Yeah, it sure will be. I'm glad they're with her parents though, they're great people; I hope they'll come here for a bit too."

"I like her parents too; it would be good to see them. I haven't seen them in ages; since our wedding. They went home to New Zealand and didn't come back. But, if Tess has the baby, I'm sure we'll see them all the time."

A few minutes later Tony and Gianni emerged from the kitchen with two huge pizzas.

They remained with Gianni and Gina for a long time; eating together, talking, laughing, and having a great time.

Before they left Tony said he needed to take care of something in the kitchen and Gianni went to help him. When he came out, Tony was carrying a basket.

"What's that? You took some food so you don't have to cook for us tonight?" Michelle asked.

"Yeah," Tony replied, deciding to keep his plan a secret. "We better go. See you guys on Monday."

"I'll come next weekend before we go to the cabin for sure. If we find time, I'll come sooner too. I'm sorry for not coming more, but that will change soon."

"It's okay honey, we understand. We're looking forward to see you again and we can't wait to have you more with us soon. "

"I can't wait either."

"Have a good night kids. Love you. Bye."

"Love you. Bye."

A couple of minutes later Tony and Michelle passed by the building they wanted to turn into their new company.

"I really like this place. It would be great to have it for our company."

"Yeah baby, it would be, but remember, don't get too disappointed if it doesn't work out," Michelle said, caressing his face. "I don't want to see you depressed ever again, even if you try to hide it from me; I know how you feel. I want you to be happy, so please, talk to me about everything, don't shut me out. I want to be there for you. I'm your wife; I love you so much and I want to help you with whatever problem you might have."

Tony placed the basket on the floor, hugging his wife tightly.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to worry about me. As long as I have you by my side, I'll never be depressed again. I allowed myself to act that way when I was rejected so many times and I feel like an idiot because of it. I promise you, I'll never do it again. I love you and as long we're together nothing else matters. But you have to promise me you won't try to protect me either, to listen to your advice, okay?"

"Okay," Michelle smiled. "Everything will be the way it's supposed to be, but no matter what happens we'll be together and together we can handle anything."

They remained hugged for a few minutes, kissing each other. When they broke their hug, Tony picked the basket and after taking Michelle's hand, they resumed walking home.

They arrived home an hour later and Tony placed the basket with their food on the kitchen counter. Since it was still too early to eat, he got the food out and placed it inside the oven and set the timer to keep it warm before they ate. Michelle sat on the couch and leaned her head on the cushions, closing her eyes. Tony came and sat by her side on the couch.

"You okay beautiful?" he asked caressing her face.

Michelle opened her eyes and smiled, "I'm fine honey; I'm just a bit tired that's all."

Tony looked at her a bit worried, "Hmmm, I don't like that you're tired," he felt her forehead, "maybe you're coming down with something, you're not warm. How do you feel?"

"I'm fine baby, honestly. I'd tell you if something was wrong," she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down to her face. "It's not like we sleep much during the weekend and we walked a lot today. I'll be fine, gorgeous," she said kissing him.

"You can rest here a bit before dinner if you want. It's still too early to eat."

"Yeah, I could. But you know I can't sleep or rest when you're not with me."

"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here."

Tony lifted himself and sat up on the couch; he then lifted Michelle from the cushions and leaned her head on his lap, placing one of the cushions under her so she's more comfortable.

"I won't sleep; I'll just close my eyes for a bit. Then we can eat our dinner."

"Okay, you just rest. We have plenty of time to eat dinner. I'm not moving, I'll stay with you," Tony smiled, kissing her forehead.

Even though she didn't want to, a few minutes later Michelle fell asleep. Tony remained looking at her, gently stroking her hair. All he could think about, as he watched her sleep, was how incredible his wife was and how lucky he was to have her in his life.

Some time later Michelle woke up to find her husband sleeping. Tony still held her in his lap and was sleeping in half sitting position with his head leaned on the cushions on the back of the couch. Even though he wasn't fully laying down, he looked comfortable, so Michelle let him sleep for a bit longer, looking at him with the same love and happiness as he did only a few hours earlier. When she looked at the clock, over half an hour later, she realized that over 3 hours passed since they came home.

Michelle sat up; she gently stroked his face, kissing his lips lovingly.

"Baby, wake up," she said.

A couple of seconds later Tony woke up and smiled, "Hey."

"Hey."

"Everything okay?"

"Everything is fine sweetheart, but we slept for over 3 hours. We should go eat our dinner and go to bed."

"Wow, I had no idea such a long time went by. We both must've been more tired than we thought. You're right, we should go eat."

When he came into the kitchen, Tony got the food out of the oven. Reaching for the basket to get the rest of it out, Tony stopped, remembering his plan. Turning around, he asked Michelle to go get the drinks he forgot in the car while he sets the table.

The minute Michelle went out, Tony picked the food and the basket, rushed out to their back porch, and started setting everything up. Aside from the deckchair and the swing, they had a little wooden table with two chairs on the back porch that was their favorite spot to eat on warmer nights. They also liked going down on the beach and eat by the rocks, but since it had been raining a lot over the past few days the sand was damp, so Tony decided eating on the porch would be a better idea.

He turned on the porch lights and placed the irises he hid in the basket onto the table. Since he knew how much his wife loved gardening and especially irises, Tony got them in a flower pot, so Michelle could take care of them later. Ever since they started living together, he always bought her potted flowers, so she can either put them around the house or use them in the little garden she created on their back porch.

Just as he got their dinner out, Tony heard Michelle coming in; he rushed inside, pulling the curtains over the glass door.

"Hey, you're back soon," he smiled, trying to make sure she doesn't see what he did outside just yet.

"Yeah honey, our car is parked right outside, remember?" Michelle said, raising her eyebrow. "What's going on with you? Why didn't you even start setting the table yet? Did something happen?"

"No honey, nothing happened. Everything is great, don't worry. Who said I didn't start setting the table?" Tony asked; with a huge smile on his face, "It's all set," he opened the curtains again. "Since it's the date it is, I couldn't let it just pass by, I had to do something…"

Tony didn't manage to finish that sentence because Michelle rushed into his arms hugging him tightly, kissing him passionately.

"This is perfect and so are you," she smiled, looking into his eyes, "I love you so very much my wonderful husband."

"I love you too, so very much," Tony replied, kissing her.

They remained hugging for a few minutes.

"Come on, let's go eat."

They got out on the porch and Tony held her chair, allowing her to sit down.

"I'll be right back; I'll go get our drinks," Tony said, kissing the top of her head.

When Tony left, Michelle looked at him, thinking how lucky she was; she was even happier to see him this way again. Her husband finally started looking and acting like his old self again; she was so grateful for it. Michelle turned to the table and noticed the peach colored irises Tony bought, her favorite flowers. Same ones Tony got her on their 10th date exactly 5 years ago, when they declared their love to each other. Ever since that night irises became their flowers and Michelle's eyes got tears of happiness when she saw them there, because they brought her back incredible memories.

Tony came with the drinks a minute later and noticed tears in her eyes as she caressed the petals of the flowers.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?" Tony asked, kneeling down next to her.

Michelle turned around and wrapped her arms around his neck, "nothing is wrong. Everything is so perfect. Seeing these irises here brought back so many wonderful memories."

"I haven't given them to you in such a long time. I bought them on Friday and kept them in the diner, especially for this day. I wanted to celebrate this date and show you how well and happy I am again, it's not too much but..."

Michelle stopped him by kissing him gently on the lips, "this is more than enough. When I see how happy and well you are, I don't need anything else. Seeing you like this is the best possible gift."

"I know, but I'll make it up to you for all these months. You're my life and you deserve the best."

"Honey, I already have the best. I have you and you know I don't need anything else; all I ever needed and all I'll ever need is you. This is so perfect and you're the biggest gift I could ever get."

"I'll never ask for anything else either," Tony replied, wrapping his arms around her.

"It's exactly 5 years that we said 'I love you' to one other and you gave me same irises for the first time."

"Sometimes it feels like it happened yesterday and sometimes like it was a lifetime ago, given what we went through."

"I know, but we're still here. We're together and we're even more in love than we were on that night."

"So much more, even though at that time I already loved you more than I ever loved anyone."

"Me too baby," Michelle kissed him, "me too."

"Let's eat."

He got up and sat on the chair across from her. Tony took her hand in his and kissed it. They ate happily, feeding one another and flirting constantly, not letting go of each other's hand.

"We should get to bed since we have to go to work in the morning," Tony said, "You already fell asleep before; you must be tired."

"I'm not anymore; right now I just want to be with you. I don't want to sleep; there's always time to sleep."

"What do you want to do?"

"Sit on the porch for a bit, wrapped in your arms," Michelle smiled. "Then when we get inside I'll show you how much I love you," she whispered.

"Sounds like a plan. I want to show you how much I love you too," Tony replied huskily.

They sat down in the deckchair wrapping their arms around each other.

"We can't stay out here for too long. We sat here for too long as it is while we ate dinner. It's too humid and I don't want you catching a cold or something worse," Tony said.

"You constantly worry about me; a bit of humidity won't kill me," Michelle smiled.

"I know, I know, but I can't stop worrying about you. It's stronger than me."

"I know it is sweetheart, I worry about you as much; even where there's no reason like now. We won't stay for long, only for a bit. I miss being out here during the night."

"I miss it too."

They sat quietly for a few minutes enjoying the closeness of the other and looking at the moon shining over the ocean, making it look like it was fluorescent.

"I still have the images of the night we said 'I love you' for the first time in my head."

"Yeah me too," Tony replied, kissing the top of her head. "That was some night, wasn't it?"

"Oh yeah, it was the best. Even though I loved all our dates before it; that was the best date I ever had, up to that point. I met Gianni and Gina and we walked on the pier after it…"

"I still don't believe that it happened only 10 days after we started dating."

"Yeah, but we did spend every free second together during those 10 days. We ate lunch together; we went out every single night… You were so adorable that I loved you after our first date," Michelle smiled.

"I loved you too baby."

"By that night we knew everything about each other. I already felt like I knew you my whole life and I already loved you more than I ever loved anyone else. I was surprised when you said that you loved me though; I didn't expect you to say it so soon, even though it was obvious that we both felt it."

"If I didn't almost fall down thanks to the darn cast on my foot…" Tony chuckled, "who knows when I would've picked the courage to tell you that I loved you."

Michelle laughed, "You almost tipped over; that cast was bugging you so much. I caught you just before you would've slammed your nose into the pier's railing. Good thing that bench was right behind us or we would've both ended up on our butts."

They both laughed when they remembered that night.

"When I sat down, I just blurted 'I love you' without it feeling like something I said for the first time. I imagined so many times before that how I'd say it. I didn't think it would be that way or that soon. I didn't even realize what I said; I was caught in the moment of you catching me and looking at me worriedly. You were making sure I was okay; even though it was obvious I was fine, since we both laughed at what had happened. When I looked at you, at your beautiful face, it just came out. Even though it was the first time I told you how I felt about you aloud, it felt so natural, like I said it million times already."

"Oh sweetie, I replied with the same 'I love you,' because it felt as natural as breathing, even though it was for the first time and after only 10 days."

"I was never fast in expressing my emotions; it was never easy for me. I was always closed and I hated talking about myself; I was even worse after my Nina experience," Tony rolled his eyes, "but I told you everything in those 10 days. Things it took me years to say to others, even some things I didn't tell anyone else… From our first date it felt so easy to talk to you, so natural like with no one else. Saying 'I love you' was as easy even though it was so fast."

"Saying 'I love you' felt like that for me too. Just like talking to you was from day one, it was never easy for me either. You know my relationship experiences before you; you know how messed up my whole life was. Talking about myself and my emotions was as hard for me too. What I did during that day… asked you out and kissed you… I never would've done it with anyone else, not in a million years, but you made it easy; you made all of it easy. We made it easy together."

"No matter how silly it sounds to others, it was so easy because we were so in love already. We already cared about each other before that day, but we didn't do anything about it, mostly thanks to me, because I kept pulling back. But thanks to poor George, you and that day we did it, and after the 10 days we spent together our feelings only kept growing stronger. You were the best thing that happened to me; I knew it after the first date... By the 10th date I already loved you so much, like no one before. I was so scared of waking up…"

"Those 10 days were so incredible that you were already the best thing that happened to me too. After we spent those 10 days together I felt like I loved you my whole life. I felt like I was dreaming and I was as scared of waking up," she smiled, looking into his eyes. "I'm so glad I'm awake with you still with me. I'm so happy you weren't just a dream."

"I'm so happy you weren't either," Tony replied, caressing her face, "though every day with you feels like a dream."

"It sure does."

They held each other tightly for awhile, their kisses becoming more and more passionate.

"Come on, we better go inside now."

"Yeah, we better. I want to show you how much I love you and I don't want to wait another minute to do it," Michelle said, lifting him to his feet; they walked hugged inside.

Tony and Michelle stood next to their bed for a long time, slowly taking one another's clothes off, gently kissing and caressing naked parts in the process.

When they were both completely naked, Tony and Michelle laid down on the bed, looking straight in one another's eyes, wrapped in each other's arms.

"You are my life and I thought I'd lost you forever on that horrible day. When you pushed me away completely I didn't think I'd ever see you again. I was so happy when I got you back, but I almost lost you again… I know why it all happened the way it did, but I'm so glad it's all over. I never want to be away from you again. Everything is so prefect now; I want it to stay like this. I want to spend the rest of my life in your arms," she caressed his face.

"I don't want anything else either. I know you understand it all now, but I still feel bad about it all. I'll make up for it though, our life is perfect now and I'll make sure it stays this way. I won't let you out of my arms for the rest of our life, I promise," Tony pulled her even closer into him.

"All I want is to have you close to me forever and everything will be perfect. I'd be lost without you," Michelle said, kissing him gently, wrapping her legs tightly around him.

"You'll never be away from me again. I won't let it happen, I promise," he replied, kissing her neck, burying his face into it.

"I know, I know," Michelle whispered, caressing his back. "I won't let it happen either."

She lifted his head so they could look into one another's eyes again. They both loved looking into each other's eyes; it felt like they were looking directly into each other's soul. Seeing the same love and desire shining through them, as they always did; no words were needed to express their true feelings. Tony and Michelle spent what seemed like an eternity in a tight loving embrace, looking into each other's eyes, whispering loving words to one another, slowly kissing and caressing each other all over, making love for hours. Afterwards they fell asleep, completely exhausted and completely happy, wrapped in each other's arms.


	16. Chapter 16

Author note: The next few chapters are based on Season 4 of 24 and although I have changed much of it, the main idea is still there

**Author note:** _Thanks for all the reviews, new ones are always appreciated._ _The next few chapters are based on Season 4 of 24 and although I have changed much of it, the main idea is still there. _

_I won't be going into full details of Season 4, so if you didn't watch it, you'll definitely get spoiled about those parts that are same and you might not fully understand parts of these chapters.  
Also those who expect lots of Jack Bauer action will be disappointed; Jack will be here, but only as a guest star. These chapters are Tony and Michelle centered, as is the rest of the story. You'll have to read the earlier chapters if you want to find out what occurred before. _  
_This is going to be Season 4, my way; the way I think it should've happened for Tony and Michelle, without some of the stupidities that went on in the show. Those who are Tony and Michelle fans and who watched it all know what I'm talking about. They are the best characters 24 ever had and they deserve happiness and since 24 writers decided not to give it to them, I will, in my own way. You were warned about all the possible spoilers and all the changes of the season I made to the season. Those of you, who decided to keep reading it, enjoy. ___

It was 5:30AM when Michelle woke up; she reached over to the nightstand and shut the alarm clock so it wouldn't ring in half an hour. She didn't want it to wake up Tony since they got lost in each other and didn't sleep much the night before.

Her husband was sleeping with his head on her chest; his arms were wrapped tightly around her. Michelle looked at him happily while he slept. He looked so peaceful; she gently caressed his hair and kissed the top of his head.

She couldn't believe today was her last day at Division and starting tonight she would no longer work there. Michelle couldn't be happier about it; she couldn't wait to be a regular civilian so they could start with their new life.

The closer they came to this day, the happier he and Michelle became.

It was the final step before they could put their plans into action.

Michelle didn't want to go to work; she wanted to hold him like this until the end of the day, but that wasn't an option. It was her last day, so Michelle still had ton of paperwork to do and needed to tie bunch of loose ends. Tony had to go to work as well. They couldn't stay home today, even though she knew he'd love to as much as she would.

Michelle looked at Tony sleeping for a while longer; she gently stroked his hair and back until it was time to wake him up. He looked so peaceful and she wanted to let him sleep a bit more, but they both had to go. She gently caressed his face and kissed his hair, "Tony… wake up. It's 6:30 AM; we have to go to work. Baby, wake up."

A few seconds later Tony opened his eyes, looked up at her, and smiled.

"Good morning sweetheart. How are you?"

"I'm great. I still can't believe it's my last day. I can't wait for it all to be over so we can start our new life already," Michelle replied happily.

Tony lifted himself up to her face and looked into her eyes. "I can't wait either," he said kissing her. "Let's take a nice long shower together and then I'll make us something to eat while you get ready to go to work."

"Sounds good to me."

45 minutes later Michelle came into the kitchen after she finished getting ready for work. She walked to her husband who was just finishing their breakfast and kissed the nape of his neck. Tony turned around and smiled, hugging her tightly and spinning her around. It was obvious on his face how happy he was.

"I love you so much, sweetheart," he said, gently rubbing her nose with his.

"I love you too honey, so much," Michelle replied. "Let's eat, I can't be late."

Tony placed their food onto the table and they sat down to eat.

"Thankfully this is your last day. Starting tomorrow you won't be late anywhere and from Monday neither will I, for ten days," he said happily.

"This will be great, this way Gianni and Gina can get used to Andrew and Marie even more, since they'll be on their own with them for the first time, and we can have a nice little vacation. It will be perfect, just you and me in the cabin, no one around us but woods, no phones, nothing."

"Sounds like a dream; it will be perfect. Gianni wanted to give me more, but I told him it wasn't necessary. I won't work there for much longer anyway, six months tops, maybe even less. Once everything is set, I'll leave him and we'll start our new future."

"I can't wait. I'm so glad we decided to give our own business a try after all."

"So am I. I'm absolutely sure we'll make it work. We can start with something simple and work our way up, just like we planned," Tony said. "And if nothing bigger works out, we can always leave it as the small business from which we'll start. We just have to make sure not to jeopardize it with the future investments."

"Yeah, you're right; we have to make sure it stays on firm ground no matter what we do after. It all sounds great, the more you talk about it, the more I can't wait. And soon after we open the business, we'll be able to start planning our family," Michelle smiled.

Tony kissed her, "now there's something I can't wait even more. I can't wait to see our child."

"Me either, I know it will be perfect just like you are."

"Or even better, like you," Tony caressed her face.

"I hope we get two, one of each, a little boy and a little girl," Michelle replied, "with a bit of both of us in each of them."

"Yeah, I hope so too. Though I won't complain no matter what gender they are as long as they're healthy. And I know both will be perfect, since you'll be their mother," Tony smiled.

"I won't complain either; just like you all I want is for them to be healthy, nothing else matters because I know the rest will be prefect. They'll be even more perfect because you'll be their father," Michelle replied happily, gently rubbing her nose against his.

They ate quietly for a while.

"Tonight we'll be free from our past and ready to start our new life, away from all the nightmares. I can't wait for you to leave. Even though that job will always be part of us and we'll treasure many of the memories from those years, I can't wait for it to be over."

"I can't wait either."

"Michelle."

"What is it honey?"

"You know how we said we won't keep anything from each other?"

"Yes?"

"Well… I did keep one thing from you, because I didn't want you to worry."

"You did? Tony, we said we won't do it anymore; we said we'll let it all out. You know what almost happened to us last time when we kept things away from each other."

"I know baby, I know. It's not like it's something new and you know about it. I just kept it away as much as I could because it's not something you should worry about. I'm still not sure if I should tell you now or tonight, when we get back home, when this part of our lives is behind us."

"Since you got it started you can tell me now… if you want."

"Yeah, I will; only because this is your last day. I hated keeping things from you again, but I kept it all away because it's my irrational fear. I didn't want to upset you and worry you for no reason, because I knew you'd worry over nothing because of me. I'm sorry baby, but I want to tell you now so I can stop thinking about it, once and for all… since this is your last day," he smiled.

"Here it goes… Even though I know you're at Division and not CTU, I'm dying of fear each time you go to work. There are so many bad things that happened to us at CTU that each time you go to work I'm so worried you'll end up over there somehow. Especially since you're a Deputy Director now; they could send you to CTU if they wanted to. They won't send you there on a quiet day, but on a day when something bad happens. You can end up hurt or worse, remember how each Director of CTU ended so far… I don't want you being the next CTU Director, because I want you to be safe. I know we discussed this million times over and I promised you I wouldn't worry about it anymore, but I can't stop. I know it doesn't make any sense, but it's stronger than me. I love you too much and I can't stop worrying until you get out of that building each night and come back into my arms. You're my whole life and I'd die without you. I've been worried sick each day, but I didn't want to tell you that I still am. I didn't want you to worry about me even more, especially not while you're still working in Division."

"Oh baby… I love you so much." Michelle said, kissing him gently.

"I'll be fine; you won't lose me so easily. I knew you were worried about this still, but I didn't push you to tell me about it because I was waiting for you to do it on your own time. I wish you told me though, because I would've told you the same thing I told you before… I know it's hard, but try not to worry so much. I doubt I'll go back to CTU and even if I do, I doubt anything will happen. You shouldn't worry so much, I'll be fine," she caressed his face and continued.

"I don't want to go back to CTU at all, especially not without you. I'll have to go if they send me though; no matter how much I don't want to go back, I won't be able to say no. Without you working with me, this job isn't the same and I can't wait to leave it and work with you again. Even though I doubt anything bad will happen to either of us, I can't help to be afraid that all of this will somehow end. This is the only thing that matters to me, you and our future together; I don't want to lose it," she squeezed his hand tightly and Tony picked it up and kissed it.

"I think we're safe though; it's my last day and I doubt something will happen. We just have to think positive and everything will be fine. Today this part of our life will be over and neither of us will have to worry again. We'll be two regular civilians with a normal life and I can't wait."

"Neither can I," Tony smiled.

"I can't believe we'll finally get to see Jack tonight."

"I know; we haven't seen him in such a long time. I bet he's in love; he sounded too happy last night; even more than when he first called us a few days ago," Michelle replied.

"Yeah, something must be up when he's so happy. We'll just have to wait and see tonight."

"Yeah, it will be an interesting dinner."

"Too bad you won't be dropping me off at work today," Michelle continued.

"Yeah, I wish I could too. I love doing it every day, but I can't today. I need to drive to Riverside and pick up the stuff Gianni needs. I wanted to send Andrew, but you know his mother is sick; neither of them has come to work for the past couple of days because they're taking care of her. I want it taken care of before we go on our trip on Monday."

"It's okay, I have the company car. I'll go to work with it and you take our car. Just promise me you'll come to eat lunch with me."

"I promise beautiful; I wouldn't miss that for anything," Tony replied, kissing her gently.

The rest of the breakfast Tony and Michelle spent enjoying their time together and planning their lunch, what they'd do when she comes home, and their dinner with Jack.

"I better go turn my phone on, I completely forgot. It's almost time to go to work anyway," Michelle said when they finished breakfast.

"Okay honey, I'll put these in the dishwasher and go get ready to go too," Tony replied.

The moment Michelle turned her cell phone on she received a call from Bill Buchanan, her boss. He told her to come to work right away because they have an emergency and they needed her there as soon as possible.

Michelle felt her stomach turning; she hoped nothing like this would happen while she was still on active duty. She was worried how Tony would react when he heard this; the last thing she wanted was for her husband to worry again. Michelle knew it was his biggest fear and at first she didn't even want to tell him, but she had to. They decided to tell each other everything and she knew she couldn't hide this from him. He'd find out soon enough anyway and it was better that he found out from her.

Tony was in the bathroom, getting ready to go to work. He was happy and humming. Michelle walked from behind him; she didn't know how to tell him, didn't want to stop his happiness. She just hugged him tightly from behind, leaning her head on his back, seeking comfort and strength in his arms.

"Hey gorgeous, missed me already?" Tony smiled; he caressed her arms and turned around.

The minute he saw her face, Tony knew something was wrong, "What is it?"

Michelle swallowed looking into his eyes, "I just received a call from Bill… something is up."

Tony's face turned white, "Oh no, not on your last day. I knew I shouldn't have been so happy. I was so happy that it's your last day, forgetting that this day has to pass smoothly too," he hugged her tightly.

"Did he tell you exactly what's wrong?"

"No, he didn't go into details; he only told me it was an emergency. Something big is up; he said he'd explain the details when I arrive, but that he needs me there as soon as possible."

"That doesn't sound good," Tony said, worried.

"I don't suppose us running away as fast and as far as possible is an option, huh?" he asked.

"Something has to happen when Jack's in town, coincidence, I think not," he smiled, trying to cheer them both up a bit, even though he was scared out of his mind.

Michelle smiled, even though she was as worried as he was.

"I don't think it is either, when there's trouble, Jack's bound to be around," she replied kissing his nose.

"And I'm afraid us running away is not an option. No matter how much I'd love it, I have to go," Michelle said, hugging him tighter, leaning her head on his chest.

They remained hugging for a few minutes, not saying a word.

"I'll tell Gianni that I can't go to Riverside. I'll tell him I'll go tomorrow; the pick up isn't urgent. I'll drive you to work."

"No baby, don't. If we sit in that car together, I'll just make you drive and not stop until we're far away from this life. Just stay home and wait for me here. I'll take the company car to work, but I don't want you driving anywhere. I can see how much this upset you, no matter how much you're trying to hide it. I don't want you crashing somewhere or getting hurt somehow. I'll call you and you can come to pick me up when it's all over, but stay home for now and take care of yourself."

"Okay, I'll stay here, but don't worry about me; I'll be fine sweetheart. Of course I'll worry about you, but I'll be okay. You just concentrate on your job," Tony smiled, unsuccessfully trying to hide how worried he is.

"I don't want to leave you alone, but I have to go. I know there's no point of telling you this, but please, try not to worry about me too much," Michelle said, looking into his eyes.

"I'll do my best."

"I know you will," she smiled.

The minute Michelle started to leave; Tony couldn't hide his fear anymore, no matter how much he wanted. He hugged her tightly again, clearly worried, "just promise me you'll come home to me. I'd die without you by my side."

"Oh baby… I'll be okay," Michelle replied, kissing him. "I don't think they'll send me to CTU. Driscoll is over there and she has things under control. Please don't worry so much. I'll come home to you, I promise, and then we'll start our future together, away from all of this. I'll be fine, my love," Michelle caressed his face. "I have to go now," she kissed him one more time and rushed to the door, turning around she smiled, "I love you, see you soon."

"I love you too baby, be careful," Tony replied.

When Michelle closed the door and he remained alone, Tony starting pacing around the house worried and scared out of his mind. After a few months of happiness, something like this had to happen, when they were so close to being free of it all. Now he could lose her, the very idea turned his stomach in the familiar knot he hadn't felt so strongly for a while. Today the knot was tighter than ever.

This time something was up, it wasn't just his irrational fear. This time it was real, something he was afraid of from the start; he could lose her and the very idea was killing him.

The first thing Tony did was calling Gianni. He told him he wouldn't be coming in, that he couldn't explain the details, but would as soon as possible. Tony didn't tell Gianni it had to do with Michelle because he didn't want to worry him or Gina for no reason; especially since he didn't know what was actually happening.

The next few hours Tony spent worrying himself sick. Watching the news, hearing about the speculations after the train bomb, he knew full well something else, probably much worse, would be forthcoming. It was always like that, it could never be just one attack and he knew it. Tony couldn't believe it all; he could not believe it was all happening yet again. He was so happy the last few days knowing the time when she'd stop working at Division was close. During all this time he hoped that something like this doesn't happen but it did.

Soon Tony became sick and tired of the news since it was nothing but speculation about the train bombing. He knew perfectly well that he wouldn't find out from the news what was going on with his wife and he was happy about it because he knew they wouldn't report good news any time soon. Tony decided to turn them off and try to keep himself busy for a while or perhaps call Jack to find out exactly what was happening. He desperately wanted to find out in how big danger his wife was. However, he knew that he couldn't do that; he couldn't call Jack or Michelle during an emergency, so he just waited for someone to call him.

Tony first tried reading, but since his mind was elsewhere he had no idea what he was reading, and quickly gave up on that idea.

Then he wanted to go for a walk, but just like her, Tony couldn't look at their back porch or imagine himself walking out there without her hand in his, so he shut the curtains, just like she did.

Tony couldn't stop thinking about Michelle, even though he knew she'd be safe at Division, no matter what was going on out there; he couldn't get her out of his mind. Everywhere he turned he would see her and would imagine the good times they had together which would calm him down for a bit, but the next thing that would come to his mind was losing her and how he'd die if that ever happened. Tony kept trying to convince himself that his wife would be safe and she would come home soon; he kept trying to think positive thoughts.

He also knew that they probably won't need her at CTU since Driscoll was there and she was more than capable of handling the situation on her own.

Tony also knew that if they needed someone from Division to help Driscoll, they would send Bill and not Michelle since he had higher rank than her.

They didn't need two directors at CTU, so unless something bad is about to happen to Driscoll, Michelle was safe.

"_And what are the odds of something bad happening to Driscoll today_," he said to himself, trying to calm down, "_with our luck…, big_," he thought grimly.

A couple of hours later, the phone rang. Hoping it was Michelle calling and hoping to hear her voice, Tony rushed to the phone. Tripping over things to get to it as fast as possible, he almost fell over the coffee table, hitting his knee.

"Son of a…"

"Tony?" he heard on the other end.

"Hello, Michelle?"

"Yeah, honey, it's me. You okay?"

"I'm fine, don't worry about me. I just bumped my knee running to the phone. Are you okay, sweetheart? Where are you?" Tony asked, massaging his sore knee.

"I'm fine honey. I'm at Division. I just wanted to call you and tell you that I'm still here and if things stay the way they are, I won't be going to CTU."

"Good," Tony sighed in relief.

"Things are really bad. So much is going on right now. It doesn't look good at all. I can't tell you about it now, but I will when I come home. I just wanted to see how you're doing."

"I'm okay honey, don't worry about me. I'm glad you called; I wanted to hear your voice too and hear how you are. Go do your job, honey. We'll talk about it when you come home." Tony said, trying to hide how worried he is.

"Okay baby. You alright? Your voice is shaking."

"I'm okay, it must be the line."

"Honey, I know you too well to let that fool me. What is it?"

"It's not the time. I shouldn't be on your mind as well."

"You're always on my mind. Sweetie, what is it?"

"It's just… I can't wait for you to come home. I can't wait to put my arms around you and know it's finally over. I just want you to be safe; I'm so worried about you."

"I know you are, try to relax. I'll be okay, nothing can happen to me here, don't worry so much. I'm as worried about you though, just stay home and wait for me. I'll call you when it's done and then you can come to pick me up, but stay home until I call you, okay?"

"I will honey. Please be careful; I'd die without you."

"You be careful too Tony, promise me you'll take care of yourself. I'd die without you too."

"I'll be fine baby, I'm home. The worst thing that can happen to me is getting sucked into the vacuum cleaner."

He heard her laughing on the other side, "You can make me laugh no matter how tough the situation is. I love you so much," Michelle said lovingly.

"I love you too baby, more than anything."

"I have to go. I probably won't call you while this whole thing is still happening. I barely managed to steal these few moments, but I had to hear your voice. Try not to worry too much. I promise I'll see you soon."

"See you soon, my love."

When he hung up, Tony was even more worried. Even though Michelle hid it, aside from her worry for his safety, he could hear the fear in her voice about the whole situation and it upset him. Because he knew his wife; he knew how strong she was and knew she wouldn't be worried over nothing. The fact that he couldn't help her if something did happen drove him nuts. When nothing managed to calm him down, he decided to clean the house, top to bottom, to keep his hands busy.

For the next 4 hours Tony cleaned their home, even though it didn't take his mind off the situation, it kept him busy and the time passed quicker. He didn't turn on the TV or radio, so he missed what happened to Heller and everything that happened after that.

Tony jumped when the phone rang again, afraid that something happened to Michelle. Since she told him she wouldn't call him again, Tony knew it wasn't her and he was sure something happened to his wife. He nearly hurt himself again running to pick up the phone, but it was Jack.

"Tony, I'm with Audrey Raines. We're trapped; terrorists cornered us at Felsted Security. I can't do this on my own; I need your help."

"Okay Jack, I'm on my way. Just give me the address and I'm coming."

When Jack gave him the location, Tony went to the wardrobe and retrieved his gun. A couple of moments later he ran out to rescue Jack and Audrey.

Tony successfully helped Jack and Audrey, saving both of their lives. An hour after he left his home, all three were in his car.

"I can't thank you enough Tony. I don't know what we would've done without you."

"No problem Jack, you saved me. It was about time for me to pay you back," Tony replied.

"Listen Tony, I need to use a computer, ours might be compromised. We need a computer to track the surveillance footage; we're looking for a guy Audrey knows, so I need her to show him to me. I also need to contact someone to come and pick Audrey up from a safe line."

"Okay Jack, you can use the phone and the computer at my place.

Michelle is at Division and I'm sick with worry. I talked to her about 5 hours ago, but she didn't have much time so she couldn't explain what's going on. I didn't want to watch the news because I knew I'd get more upset, so I have no idea what's going on aside from the train bombing. I want to know now though, can you fill me in?"

Jack explained to Tony what was going on in a few words; what he heard made him worry all the more.

"But don't worry, Driscoll has her claws in CTU, she's not going anywhere. I doubt they'll bring Michelle in. She'll be safe at Division."

"I hope so Jack; I nearly lost her too many times already. I don't want to risk losing her again. I couldn't live without her; she's my life."

"Everything will be okay Tony," Jack assured him.

"Yeah… I just can't wait to have her back in my arms," Tony replied. "Not being there with her is killing me. I just want to protect her and the fact that I won't be able to… If something happens to her, I…"

"I know my friend, I know. Nothing will happen to your wife, don't worry. We'd all be happier with you in CTU, but the situation is like this, so we'll have to deal with it the best we can."

"Yeah, I'd be happiest if both Michelle and I were somewhere far away from this whole situation, but you're right; we have to deal with it the best we can. Let's just hope it all ends as soon as possible and she comes home to me safely."

After they arrived at Tony and Michelle's house and did everything they needed to do, Tony and Jack left Audrey to rest while she was waiting for Secret Service to come to pick her up and take her back to CTU.

"Tony, I could really use your help. I don't trust anyone more than I trust you. I need your help with this situation. Will you help me?" Jack asked.

"I'm finally happy; I moved on with my life. Michelle and I are happier than ever. I really don't want that to get screwed up. I promised her I won't get out of the house and I promised to wait for her home until she calls me. But I don't know how to say 'no' to you on a day like today," Tony replied.

"I don't want to force you; I just need you. CTU will send a team, but I need you by my side, like in old days. This will be the last time."

"I truly hope so, Jack. I'm sick and tired of this life. I thought I'd be rid of it today since its Michelle's final day and this happens. I can't wait for us to be civilians and never think about any of this again. I just hope my wife and I will get to do that soon," Tony sighed.

"I tell you what, since I can't abandon you on a day like today, I'll help you so long as you promise me not to tell Michelle anything about my involvement until it's necessary."

"I won't say anything to her until you decide, I promise."

"Okay, good. She's worried about me enough as it is. I don't want her to think she can lose me on top of everything else. She has enough things on her mind right now with this whole situation. We've been through some rough times but we managed to get out of it. We had enough, especially Michelle; I don't want her to suffer anymore."

"I know Tony, I'm glad you two handled it. I hated looking at Michelle suffering like that while you were in prison. She is like a sister to me. I also hated watching you suffer when you pushed her away for her safety. You were in hell all the time in that prison, but you looked the worst without her around. What you guys went through after you came out probably wasn't easy for either of you either. I know how much you love each other and I'm glad you're both finally happy again. You both deserve it. How is the job search going?"

"No one wanted to hire me because of my record so I gave up in the end. I'm working with Gianni now, until Michelle and I start our own business. I'm so worried how our business will work with my record, maybe this day will make it clear that I'm not a traitor and then our future might be better. Michelle deserves the best."

"I'll make sure no one thinks that, you're not a traitor and I hate how people look at you. I'm sure this day will prove it all. I'll get you into CTU when we finish the field part. I need someone I can trust in there."

"I'm not sure I want to go back there, but I will if you think it's necessary. I used to love that job, part of me still does, part of me will always love it and misses it, but I don't want to do it anymore. I moved on with my life; I'm so happy and I don't want to go back to my old life. I want both of us out of it as soon as possible; I don't want us close to any of it and not going back to it. However, I'll go back to it; I'll do what it takes for this to end as fast as possible, but only for this one day, then both Michelle and I will be out of it and we'll never look back."

"I know Tony; it's only until this day ends because with you around, I'm sure it will go even better and faster. The new people at CTU can't measure with our old staff. Poor Chloe can't do everything on her own. It will be good to have you in there again."

"Yeah, I won't be happy to go back there, but I'll do what I have to. I doubt they'll be happy to see me either. They all see me as a traitor too."

"I'll take care of it. Don't worry."

"Oh, I'm not worried. I don't care how they see me. CTU is on my mind only when she's at work. I just want this to end. Michelle and I have so much planned and we're both excited about it. We can't wait to start with our plans. I keep thinking they'll send her over there or somewhere like that damn hotel and I'll end up losing her, because I won't be able to help her."

"They won't send her there, Tony, or to some field assignment. She'll be fine. Besides, Michelle is strong and a good agent; she'll be fine."

"I know she is; she's the strongest person I know and she can take care of herself. She doesn't need me to protect her, but I can't help it; she's my whole life. Nothing matters to me without her. Maybe this way if they do send her to CTU, I'll be able to get close to her and look after her. I hope they'll leave her in Division though, no matter what happens. All I want is for her to be safe."

"She will be safe Tony, nothing will happen to her. We'll take care of this situation and everything will be over sooner than you know it."

"I really hope so Jack. I promised my wife I'd stay home, but I know she'll understand that I had to help you, and I will, with whatever you need. However, I don't want Michelle to find out from someone else that I'm involved. I want to be the one to tell her about all of this when the time comes, unless something happens to me."

"Nothing will happen to you, my friend. I'm not going to let anything happen to you. You'll be the one to tell her about everything.

You should've called me when you were unable to find a job. I'm sure I would've been able to help you; if not, I would've shot someone. And if anyone calls you a traitor again, they'll have to talk to me and I'll kick their ass or shoot them," Jack grinned.

"Thanks Jack," Tony laughed, "but I'm okay. We're both satisfied with the way things are at the moment and with the direction they're going in. And besides, I think Michelle will do the ass kicking if someone calls me a traitor again."

"I bet she will."

They both laughed on that.

"I can't wait to have her back in my arms; I'm so worried about her. I just hope this all goes smoothly so we can get on with our life," Tony said looking worried again.

"It will, don't worry about it Tony. Everything will be okay, nothing will happen to your wife."

"She's my only reason to keep going, losing her would kill me, but I'm sure you're right." Tony smiled. "When it all ends the four of us will go to that dinner we planned before this happened. Michelle guessed right away you must be in love. She'll be happy to see you like this. You and Audrey seem really happy; I haven't seen you like this since before Terri died."

"That's because I haven't felt like this since then, Audrey is amazing. I didn't think I'd be able to love anyone like this again. I can't wait for you both to get to know her better; I know you'll like her."

"I'm sure we will; she seems like a really nice person. We'll go to that dinner soon so Michelle and I can get to know her better. We'll tell you about everything we planned too. I just hope this day will end well" Tony said, twisting his ring around, thinking about his wife, hoping she'll be safe and in his arms soon.

His safety didn't matter to him again. Tony didn't think about the danger he would soon be in, he didn't care, somehow he knew he'd be alright; all he thought about was Michelle and making sure she'd come out of this safe. Her safety was all that mattered to him.

Even though he promised Michelle he wouldn't set foot outside of their home and knew she'd worry about him, and that was the last thing he wanted, Tony couldn't leave his friend on his own. Jack helped him so many times and he had to help him on a day like this one. Tony knew Michelle would understand that. He also knew she would understand why he didn't do as promised and knew she wouldn't do it any other way.

Tony didn't like going back to CTU; he wanted to put that life in the past more than anything, but no matter how much he was looking forward to their new life, part of him was glad for the opportunity to help stop terrorists again, for doing the job he once loved and for being able to help put this day to an end. However, a bigger part of him wanted it all to end; he couldn't wait for them both to be away from this life once and for all. He hoped for their life to continue as planned starting tomorrow. Tony closed his eyes and wished it was tomorrow already and wished to have Michelle back in his arms, safe and sound. No matter how worried about the whole situation he was, thinking about their future cheered him up a bit and he was somehow sure everything would be fine. _"Nothing will separate us anymore,"_ he thought to himself. _"We've been through_ _enough and this is just another bump on the road we'll safely go over. Starting tomorrow our future will begin."_

A few minutes later Secret service came and took Audrey back to CTU. Soon after that Jack and Tony took off to pickup the suspect.


	17. Chapter 17

**Author note:** _Thanks for all the reviews, new ones are always appreciated._

_I hope you'll like second part of my season 4 too._

Twenty hours later Michelle was holding Tony tightly.

She wrapped her arms around him and leaned her head on his chest; feeling it rise and fall, listening to his heart beat.

They had just finished bathing one another and were holding each other under the shower in their home. It was nice and warm in there and they didn't feel like getting out; they both needed it to relax after what they went through. The water was falling slowly on them and Tony's strong arms around her, slowly stroking her back, made her feel calm and safe.

However, all Michelle could think about was how close she came to losing her husband forever. Even though he assured her about this the minute they were reunited upon his return to CTU, she couldn't help feeling bad about what happened.

Since Michelle was quiet for awhile, Tony stroked her back and gently lifted her head with his fingers, making her eyes meet his. When he saw the worried look in them, he said, "Hey."

"Hey," Michelle replied, without saying anything else; she just kept looking into his eyes.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong? I know this was a last day from hell. It wasn't the last day either of us hoped for. Far from it, but it's over. We're both alive, we're home, and we're together. This time it's over," he smiled.

"I still can't believe you're here with me, when…" her eyes filled with tears; she bit her lower lip. "When that car exploded and I thought you were in it, I felt like I'd die on the spot. My whole life seemed over; I thought my heart would break."

"Oh honey…," Tony hugged her tighter again. "I know what it must've been like for you. I can imagine it quite well, because I felt it each time I came close to losing you and the very idea of losing you forever is…" he took a deep breath and kissed her hair. "But it's over honey. I wasn't in there, Jack got me out, and it all ended well; stop thinking about it."

"How can I? I know you told me already not to think about it, but I can't help it. I feel so guilty about you almost dying. It is my fault; I almost killed you because I didn't do what she told me to. I almost let you die when I could've…"

Tony stopped her with his kisses, "you couldn't have done anything other than what you did. You couldn't have risked so many lives because of me and I don't blame you. Baby, our situation was different and you couldn't have acted any other way. You knew where I was, Jack was there, everything was set so I would get out of there safely and I did, one way or the other, I did.

I had no idea where you were, no one really cared if you got out of there safely; they wanted Saunders. I didn't know where you were or how to get you out of there and it was a split second decision. Even though I knew getting Saunders and the virus was more important to the big picture; I still couldn't let them torture you in front of me. If I hadn't complied with his demands, he would've tortured and killed you for sure. I couldn't let that happen; I had no choice. You could've, because I was easier to save. Please stop worrying about this," Tony smiled kissing her again. "You made the right choice; if you hadn't, the bomb would've exploded over our heads and we wouldn't be talking right now anyway, so you actually saved me. You saved all of us by not doing what that dumb woman told you to."

"When she called, I started doing what she wanted, but then Bill walked in, he was talking on the phone and during his conversation he mentioned how many lives would be lost if the bomb went off, and I couldn't… I couldn't put my love, my own selfish desire to save you, over all those people. No matter how much losing you would devastate and probably kill me, I couldn't.

When I made that decision I felt like I'd die, but when I imagined everything that would happen if the bomb exploded, I just couldn't… I would've taken your place in a heartbeat, if that was an option. I didn't care if I lived or died if something happened to you, because I would've died if something did anyway.

Do you understand why I had to do it? You do know how much I love you, don't you? You do know this has nothing to do with that?" she asked, tears filling her eyes even more.

"Oh baby…" Tony wiped her tears. "Of course I do. You did what you had to do, like I already told you, and it's over now. I know what you did doesn't mean you love me any less than I love you. Each time I look into your eyes, with every kiss and touch, I can see and feel how much you love me. The decision you made doesn't mean you love me any less. I know you would've died in my place, I know how much this decision made you suffer and I know it was a hard choice, but it was the right one.

It's the decision I wanted you to make, because neither of us could go through a situation like that again. I don't want anything bad to happen to anyone because of me, especially to you. I couldn't have lived with myself; I would've died anyway. I was lucky that no one died when I made that choice. If you made this one, so many people would've died and neither of us could've lived with that. So you made the right choice baby, the only right choice…" he kissed her.

"I know neither of us could've lived with that choice again; I still feel bad about what happened on that day. During the past months you calmed me down a lot, but as you know, it all still haunts me sometimes and if someone else died as a result of my decision… That's one of the reasons why I couldn't do it; I remembered that day and I imagined more people dying because of me."

"Just to remind you… no one died because of you on that day," Tony caressed her face. "But I know how you still feel about it and I completely understand why you couldn't do it; it's okay honey."

"You still did it to save me despite everything that could've happened; you risked countless lives. Many people could've died because of your decision too. No one died only because of pure luck, but you still did it and I didn't."

"No one died like this either. And if you did what she told you to, so many would've, including the two of us."

"I know but you could've…"

"No, she needed me alive. No matter what you did, I have a pretty good feeling that nothing would've changed. She needed me and she would've taken me with her until she didn't need me anymore and then she would've probably killed me regardless of what you did. So this was a better option because you found me sooner and saved me. Who knows what would've happened in any other case? Michelle, stop worrying, please, everything is fine. It's finally over and we'll be together forever this time. This decision of yours only made me love you more, just like mine made you love me more. Even though I already knew it; it made me see even more what an incredible, strong person my wife is and I love you more with every second that goes by."

"I love you… I love you so much," Michelle replied, kissing him.

"Even though that was the right choice to make, you have no idea how much it hurt me making it. I kept hoping everything would turn out okay, but when I thought you died because of my decision…" she bit her lower lip; her eyes started filling with tears again.

"After the explosion I was in a complete shock and Bill sent me home. I just sat in our car, crying. I couldn't imagine going home without you again. Imagining my life without you was so painful… I just didn't know what to do. I felt like I was dead even though I was still alive. I wanted to find out that you didn't die in vain, that they destroyed the damn bomb and everything would be fine and then I probably would've died. One way or the other I would've died, that bomb wouldn't have to kill me. I would've died of a broken heart, because I couldn't imagine going on without you. I love you too much and my life would've been over with yours," tears started falling down her cheeks.

"Losing you one more time would've been too much for me to handle. Especially because this time you would've been gone from me forever. I couldn't live without you; I just couldn't," she looked into his eyes, caressing his face, holding his hand tightly, wanting to feel that he's real.

Even though it was hot in the shower Michelle started shivering head to toe.

"I'm right here, sweetheart. I'm not going anywhere," Tony said, kissing her tears away. "Come on, let's get out of here."

He turned off the water and opened the shower door.

He then took a big towel, wrapped it around them both, warming her up. Tony wrapped his arms tightly around her, pulling her as close to him as possible. Michelle was still shivering, she leaned her head on his chest, hugging him tightly, "just don't let me go," she whispered.

"I won't. Everything is okay, I'm not going anywhere. Shhhh…," he held her like that for a while, gently massaging her back, calming her down with his closeness and touches.

When he felt her slowly calming down, Tony said, "I couldn't live without you either but I don't want you to ever think like that. If I die before you, I don't want you to be miserable for the rest of your life, or die of a broken heart. That's the last thing I would want, I want you to keep going and be as happy as you can be and not…" he hugged her a bit tighter, kissing her hair. "The only thing I ever want is for you to be happy, with or without me."

Michelle looked up and caressed his face, "I couldn't live without you; no matter how much you want me to. Just like I know you wouldn't be able to live without me, if something happened to me, no matter how much I want you to. I know you want me to be happy as much as I want you to be. We both think of the other first and we both want what's best for the other, but the best thing for both of us is being together. Any other option would make us miserable and it would destroy and kill us eventually. We both know that no matter how long we would endure living without the other, either of us would never be truly happy again," she said.

"But from now on, nothing will separate us; we don't have to think about it anymore, right?" Michelle asked, looking into his eyes.

"Right," Tony replied, kissing her passionately. "Nothing will separate us again."

They hugged each other tightly; "This feels so good," Tony whispered in her ear, nuzzling it.

"Yeah it does," Michelle replied kissing his neck; they remained hugging for a while longer.

Some time later without saying anything else, Tony and Michelle slowly dried each other off, while gazing into one another's eyes constantly and planting gentle kisses on their lover's body.

Afterwards, taking a bottle of lotion, they gently rubbed it on one another, slowly caressing the other's body, enjoying the feeling of their hands on their lover's skin.

When they were done, Tony started kissing her shoulders and neck, gently stroking her all over. "I love you so much; you're so amazing and I'm so lucky to have you," he said between the kisses.

"I love you too baby, more than I can say. I don't know what I would do without you," Michelle replied, caressing him all over.

Even though she didn't want him to hear in her voice that she was still thinking about what happened, Michelle didn't manage to hide it.

When he realized that his wife was still upset about the whole situation, Tony picked her up and carried her to their bed.

He gently lowered her on the bed and started planting kisses all over her body. "I don't want you to think about what happened anymore. I love you with all my heart and I'm not going anywhere," Tony said between the kisses.

Michelle just closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of his lips on her body. She didn't say anything; she just gently went with her fingers through his hair as he continued with his loving kisses and words.

"It's over. Starting today we're moving on with our life and our plans, nothing will stop it anymore and nothing will separate us. It's just you and me from now on, no more CTU, Division or any of that; it belongs to our past now. We're civilians, both of us; that life is over. We're in charge of what will happen from now on and nothing will mess it up. Nothing, because we won't let it," he reached her lips and they kissed passionately for a while.

Some time later Tony spooned her in his arms, gently stroking her stomach and breasts. Michelle turned around looking into his eyes, "I know we said we should get some sleep but I don't want to; I want you. I want to sit in your lap; I need you so much," she said lovingly, gently stroking his face.

On that Tony smiled, his eyes filled with passion, "I need you as much baby. Sleeping can wait."

They sat up and looking into their lover's eyes, gently caressed each other for some time; kissing one another all over.

Tony pushed himself on the middle of the bed and Michelle straddled him. He then lowered her in his lap, gently easing himself into her.

Both felt a rush of emotions when they joined and hugged each other tightly.

"I love you so much; nothing matters to me if you're not with me," Michelle said, planting gentle kisses all over his face, while Tony gently caressed her back. "I love you too baby," he said. "You're my whole life."

"I can't believe I almost lost you again," she said, hugging him even tighter, wrapping her legs around him, getting herself as close to him as possible, burying her face in his neck.

"Shhh… I'm here and you won't lose me. We'll be together forever this time. Everything will be okay from now on, you'll see, everything will be prefect," Tony replied. He gently lifted her head and looked into her eyes, "Hey… It's over."

"We're together and that's how we're staying forever; everything is already perfect. Nothing else matters and nothing we can't handle will happen from now on because we'll be by each other's side for the rest of our lives." Michelle looked back into his eyes and finally smiled completely happy, like she used to smile before the events of the past year and a half happened, as if she woke up from a nightmare and realized it would never come back. What Tony has been repeating to her settled in at last, "It's finally over."

"Yeah, sweetheart, it is," Tony replied happily, he kissed her tugging her lower lip gently, hugging her tightly.

"I'm never letting you out of my sight again. I'm so happy you're finally out of that place. I was so scared I'd lose you somehow, that something bad would happen to you, but now I have you all to myself and I'm never letting you go," he said rocking them back and forth. "I don't know what I would do without you."

"I'm not going anywhere either honey, you don't have to worry about that anymore," she gently caressed his face. "No matter how bad this day was… I didn't lose you in the end and that's all that matters," Michelle said leaning her head on his shoulder, kissing his neck.

"And you never will. You won't have to worry about losing me anymore and neither will I about losing you," Tony replied lovingly; planting gentle kisses and caresses all over her body.

They relished every second of their lovemaking, being in this position made them feel as they were one. Tony and Michelle remained like that for a long time, constantly kissing and caressing each other, whispering loving words to one other, not breaking the eye contact for a second. They were both thrilled about the fact that this time nothing would separate them and that they'd finally get the future they both so desperately wanted.

Some time later when they were both completely satisfied, Tony and Michelle were lying on sides in their bed. They wrapped their legs together and were lying close to each other, looking into their lover's eyes, holding hands tightly; with the other hand they caressed one another.

"We should try falling asleep now; we've been up for over 30 hours."

"I know, but I can't sleep; this whole day is still running in my mind. I just can't believe what we had to go through again," Michelle replied. "You sleep; I'll be okay. Don't worry about me. I just need to look at you for a little while longer to let it all sink in."

Tony looked at her worried, "Hey, hey, I thought we went through all of this. I thought I convinced you that I understand and fully approve what you did, that I love you and that it's the only thing you could've done; it's the choice I wanted you to make. Stop thinking about it baby, please, you didn't do anything wrong. You worried so much over the last year and a half, more than enough for the entire life time. I don't want you to worry or to be upset anymore, there's no reason for it. All I want is to see you smile all day long, like you used to do, before all of this happened and now it can finally happen again. So relax, let's enjoy spending the rest of our lives together without a single worry on our minds," he caressed her face.

Michelle kissed him, "we will baby; it is the only thing I want too. I want to see you happy all day long like you used to be too and you have no idea how glad I am it can finally happen. Don't worry, I won't start that again, you assured me of everything… for now. I know I couldn't do anything else and I know you approve the decision I made. I also know you don't doubt how much I love you and that you love me as much as you did before this decision…"

"Even more," Tony replied, playing with her curls.

"Even more," Michelle smiled, "but I'll still have things that will bother me for a while from it. Just like I have from the other days, just like you do too."

"I know you will but I'll be here with you forever and anything that might bother you in the future I'll help you to get through it, and you'll help me. Like I told you before, from any nightmare we'll wake up together and this time it will be forever. Nothing will separate us again."

"You have no idea how happy I am because of that idea. We'll help each other to deal with anything… forever," Michelle kissed him. "I know you won't hide anything from me anymore, like you haven't been hiding for the past 3 months."

"Don't worry sweetheart, I won't make that mistake again. I like telling you everything much more, just like I know you like it too."

"Yeah, I do," she smiled. "I missed doing it so much and I'm happy we're doing it again."

"So am I honey," Tony replied happily, "so am I."

"It was one hell of a day though, huh? More than once it all could have gone totally wrong. We could have lost the President when Air Force One was damaged during the attack. Had that missile stuck it rather than one of the escort fighters, it would have blown off most of Air Force One's wing."

"Yeah, when the stealth fighter fired that missile and it detonated close to Air Force One, I was sure it was going to crash and kill everyone onboard." Tony replied. "Thankfully the design of Air Force One allowed it to survive the near hit and make it to Palm Springs. The near crash landing when it touched down and the gear collapsed was just as scary as when the missile struck."

"It could have been worse. The President could have been sucked out of the aircraft when the debris breeched the hull and it decompressed. The football was sucked out along with several people, but thankfully the President wasn't one of them," Michelle said.

"I know; if Keeler hadn't managed to persuade the Chinese Premiere to release Lee… Who knows what would've happened."

"Yeah, who knows; I'm still surprised that he managed to do it. That Consul was dragging his feet to call the Premiere in China. It's a miracle they managed to find a way to get to the Premiere so fast and fix the situation or it could've gone much, much worse. Jack was ready to enter the Consulate before they reached the Premiere."

"Yeah, I'm glad it all went the way it did. Dealing with China wouldn't have been walk in the park. If we raided their Consulate like Jack was prepared to do in matter of minutes, we could all be in serious trouble right now and who knows what worries I would have on my mind. Fortunately it all went well and we don't have to worry anymore," Tony smiled, caressing her face.

"Yeah, this way nothing about this day will ever come back to haunt us. Only the damn woman part," Michelle said but smiled a bit.

Tony kissed her, "but that will leave too, because nothing you did was wrong. We both did everything by the book and everything is over now."

"Yeah, it is," Michelle replied happily, holding his hand tightly.

"I still can't believe I get to keep you. First our vacation and then we'll start with our plans. Before you know it, we'll be a mom and dad," she kissed him.

"I can't wait sweetheart," Tony replied, going with his hand up and down her back.

"I can't wait either," Michelle smiled.

"Honey, I know how much you want our babies and so do I, but promise me one thing."

"What?"

"If things don't turn out the way we wish them to, if we don't manage to have kids… I don't want you to suffer because of it. I want kids just like you do, but if life doesn't let us have them, I'll be happy if it's just the two of us too. I'll be the happiest and luckiest man alive, and that's what I want for you too; all I want is for you to be happy. The last thing I want is for you to suffer; I never want to see you miserable again. Even though I know we can't control how we'll react in that circumstance, promise me you won't shut me out to protect me. Promise me you'll let it all out and tell me everything that bothers you and not suffer on your own. I want to be there for you, no matter what."

"Oh honey," she caressed his cheek.

"We lived without kids for 3 years; there was always a chance we might not get them at all and I was fine with it. Not until recently did I realize how much I actually wanted them. I want to be the mother of our children more than anything. If life doesn't let us have them, I'll be sad because of it, just like I know you will be. However, I'll also be happy because I'll have the most incredible husband to spend the rest of my life with and that will be enough for me. No matter what happens, I'll never be as miserable as I was during the time I thought you died in that car... no matter what happens in our future I'll never be miserable again, as long as I get to keep you. With you by my side I can handle anything and we'll deal with whatever future brings us together, no matter what, I promise," she smiled.

"You have to promise me the same thing though. I don't want you shutting me out of anything ever again. Promise me we'll deal together with whatever happens in the future."

"We will sweetheart, I promise," Tony replied, kissing her.

For a while they just laid there looking into each others eyes, caressing one another gently.

When she gently touched the cut on his lip, Michelle looked a bit more worried again, "Does this hurt you?"

"No baby, it doesn't."

Michelle then gently caressed the bruise on his eye, "What about this bruise?"

"No, I can hardly feel it there."

She then gently went across the stun gun wound on his chest, "And this, does it hurt?"

"No honey, it's fine. I'm fine."

"What about your foot, we stood in that water for a long time, is it okay too?" she asked worried.

Tony kissed her, "Sweetheart, we went through this already when we got home. I'm okay, don't worry about me," he smiled, "I'm fine."

Michelle smiled back, "Good, I know you already said you're okay, but I can't help worrying about you," she went with her hand over all his old and fresh cuts, scars and bruises.

"You're full of these from all kinds of bad things you went through and I hate it. They all could've been worse and could've taken you away from me. I'm just so happy you're okay and with me. I'd be lost without you," she said, not letting go of his hand.

"I'm not going anywhere. You won't get rid of me so easily," he said, kissing the top of her nose. "We'll be together for a long, long time."

"Good," she replied happily, "I'm so happy to have you close to me, especially after a say like this. I feel blessed to be in your arms."

"I feel as blessed to have you in my arms; and so lucky to have someone as perfect as you by my side."

"You're perfect yourself, I'm as lucky to have you," Michelle smiled.

"I can only imagine how poor Jack must be feeling right now, all alone again. I feel so sorry for him. He looked so miserable when he watched Audrey getting into that helicopter with her husband," she continued.

"I know. I feel sorry for him too. They looked so in love when they were here; I thought he'd finally settle down. Few hours later everything changed. You should've seen her and Jack when they were here; they acted like two love birds. I never could've imagined that a few hours later they'd be apart and that she'd leave with another man."

"I can't blame her for what happened though. She probably thought her marriage was over and she tried to get on with her life. She and Jack probably fell in love without either of them expecting it to happen. I didn't talk to her much about the personal stuff since the day went the way it did, but I can tell you for sure that she isn't the type who would hurt either of the men. I can only imagine how bad she must've felt when she realized how strong her feelings for Paul still were," Michelle replied.

"I think what bothered her most was seeing Jack in the field, torturing Paul, of all people; acting completely different from what she was used to when they were in DC. I think that made her question her feelings for him. Paul acted so bravely during all of that, it probably triggered her feelings for him too."

"Yeah, probably; I also think the fear for his life during those two surgeries woke a lot of it up. While she was scared he'd die, she probably realized she didn't want to lose him again and realized how much she loved him. With everything she and her husband went through, their old love and strong feelings that were hidden under the anger woke up."

"True, though I'm sure if any of this hadn't happened, Audrey and Jack would've remained together. But, she was in love with a different Jack and she didn't recognize him anymore when he acted the way he does while doing his job."

"That life isn't for everyone and it wouldn't be right for her to remain with Jack if she wasn't absolutely sure that she could put herself through it. She cares about them both and I'm sure it was a tough choice, but she made one. Since she still obviously has strong feelings for her husband it wouldn't be fair to anyone if she didn't do what she did, especially to Jack. It is better this way and I'm sure Jack will see it soon too."

"I'm sure he will, but for the time being he'll be quite miserable. I feel so bad for him right now. I'm so glad I got to keep you; I don't know what I would do without you," he said, kissing her neck.

"I'm glad too, because I don't know what I would do without you either," she replied. "If I got separated from you again, I wouldn't be able to fall in love with anyone else. I can't imagine loving anyone else, ever again. I love you too much," Michelle said kissing him gently on the lips.

"I love you too; I can't imagine loving anyone else either. I also can't imagine what could possibly separate me from you ever again, so don't mention it, because I don't even want to think about that possibility, okay?" Tony smiled.

"That possibility doesn't exist anymore," Michelle replied.

"I just feel so bad for poor Jack. He just can't get lucky in love. Ever since Terri died, each of his relationships ended badly. But he'll be hurt the most about this one and he'll need our help."

"Yeah, he'll need us a lot and we'll be there for him like always; like good friends and family should do," Michelle smiled. "We have to invite him to lunch or something one of these days, whenever he's free. I'm sure he needs to talk to us about everything that happened between them. I feel so bad for him; he's like a brother to me. He helped us both a lot, especially while you were away. Thanks to him I got you back much sooner than I would've; we have to help him too."

"Yeah, he did a lot for us both during that time; we need to help him now. We'll have to be there for him and talk to him whenever he might need us. We'll have to see if Kim and Chase would come for couple of days and bring little Angela with them or invite him to go to them. He mentioned the little girl many times while I was in prison and always said how playing a grandfather made him happy," Tony said.

"That's a good idea honey; he told me that too, several times, before he went to Washington. He would always come back happy from his visits to them. I'll email Kim in the morning," she replied, yawning.

"Listen baby, no matter how much I love talking to you all night long, we both need to sleep. It's been a long day."

Tony let go of her hand and slipped his arm under her; he wrapped his other arm around her waist, pulling her completely into him. "How 'bout we try to fall asleep now and continue this over breakfast tomorrow, huh?"

Michelle slipped one arm under him too; she wrapped the other around his neck, "Sound good to me," she replied happily.

"I love you so much honey," Tony said, gently rubbing his nose against hers.

"I love you too honey," Michelle replied, going with her fingers through his hair, "so much."

They kissed deeply and passionately for a while, transferring all their love into those kisses, enjoying feeling free at last.

A few moments after that, Michelle snuggled up to her husband and Tony covered them both, hugging her tightly.

"Good night my love," he said, kissing her hair.

"Good night my love," Michelle replied kissing his chest.

They soon feel asleep; knowing that nothing will keep them apart and together they could handle anything.


	18. Chapter 18

**Author note:** _I'm sorry for the delay on this chapter, offline world got in the way. I hope you'll enjoy it, let me know what you think._

The following morning a bad dream woke Michelle first. Tony was sleeping with his head on her chest, his arm resting on her stomach.

She looked down at her husband and smiled when she saw him sleeping; he looked so peaceful and content. The minute she saw him, Michelle felt better.

Michelle was a strong woman, much stronger than most, she handled all sorts of bad missions, survived them just fine and went again on more without a problem, whenever CTU would send her.

The event of the prior day, however, shook her badly. Up until now she didn't think anything could shake her more than the hell she went through in that hotel and especially the hell she went through when her husband went to prison, but the events of the prior day did.

Michelle didn't want to admit it or think about it anymore, but she couldn't stop. Tony convinced her of what she already knew; she did what she had to do. Her choice, no matter how painful, was the right one. She couldn't have done what that woman asked, no matter how much she wanted to do it, and she knew it perfectly well. Michelle knew if she was placed in an identical situation again, she would make the same decision. Her husband knew it too and he was proud of her, proud of her courage and her strength.

Even though they made entirely different choices when they were placed in similar situations, Tony knew how much she loved him and knew her decision didn't mean that she loved him any less than he loved her. On the contrary, Michelle would've taken his place in a heartbeat; she would've died for him, just like he would for her, and Tony knew that. The only thing her decision meant was that they were two different people who acted differently when they were presented a horrible choice; it had nothing to do with their love for each other. Her decision still bothered her though, she knew it was the right thing to do and she knew her husband knew it too, but the idea of how close she came to losing him forever didn't let her be in peace.

All she could see when she closed her eyes was the car exploding along with her insides, thinking her husband was in it.

Michelle caressed his face when she remembered that moment again.  
She smelled his hair and kissed it, content to feel her husband's strong, warm body next to her, content to be able to feel his weight and feel him breathe. Tony was her entire life and all her love, without him her life made no sense. He was her reason to do anything, to be strong and to keep going.

She knew she wouldn't have lived for much longer after that decision though, if he had died in that explosion she'd have died too.

Even though life can sometimes hurt more than actual torture; Michelle believed that one should end their own life only when faced with torture, such as the situation at the hotel. Despite the fact that the idea of killing herself would undoubtedly pass through her mind, Michelle knew she'd do her best to keep going, even though the remainder of her life without her husband would be like torture.

Michelle knew it wouldn't be for long though, because her heart would kill her; it would break without him. It already felt like it would explode while she sat in their car after thinking her husband was dead. Tony moved a bit in his sleep and Michelle caressed his face again.

She closed her eyes and tried to remember how she got to the car on her own, but she still couldn't remember all the details. Even though she wanted to stay and make sure they'd find the bomb in time, Michelle was in a complete state of shock. When Bill sent her home, she just got out of CTU and walked to the car. Even though the rain was pouring, she didn't even feel it. She was soaked when she reached the car and had no idea. The whole thing settled in when she hung up the phone after Tony called her. She removed wet strands of hair out of her eyes, at first thinking they were wet because of her tears only to remember later that it was raining…

Michelle opened her eyes and looked at her husband, Tony was still asleep and was smiling; she gently kissed his hair. She felt blessed to have him in her arms, knowing the fact he's alive saved them both.

For the rest of the hour Michelle looked at her husband sleeping, gently caressing him. She decided to push the bad memories away as far as possible, into the past where they belong and replace them with happy thoughts of their future life that was coming. Michelle started imagining how they'd start working together again soon, what their future store would look like and about everything they still have to do to make it work. She also imagined how she'd paint and decorate the nurseries, and how their kids would be. All of this cheered her up again and when her husband opened his eyes and looked up at her she was smiling completely happy.

"Good morning handsome," she said.

"Good morning gorgeous," Tony replied. "Why are you awake already?"

"I woke up about an hour ago, but I decided to let you sleep more and watch. You know how much I love that," Michelle gently caressed his face.

"I love it as much," he smiled, kissing her neck. "Are you hungry?"

"Yeah," she replied, "but I want to hold you some more before we go eat."

"You held me enough. It's my turn now," Tony smiled and lifted himself up. Placing his pillow on the headboard, he propped himself up against it, "come here, beautiful."

Michelle lifted herself up; she slipped her arm under his back and leaned her head on his chest, wrapping her other arm around him, hugging him tightly. Tony wrapped his arms around her in the same manner.

"This feels so nice," Michelle sighed happily. "What's even better is that I don't have to hurry anywhere on my own today or ever again."

"Nope, I won't be dropping you off only from now on; we'll be constantly working together again."

"Everyday forever, I can't wait. I missed it so much."

"Neither can I. I missed it as much. I'll be so happy to have you by my side all day long again. Those 10 hours a day without you felt like 10 months."

"They felt as long for me, baby."

Tony kissed her, "you'll only go back to Division to pick your things up and then we'll be done with that place and that life."

"Oh yeah," she smiled. "You'll come with me to get my things, won't you?"

"Of course, I'll help you carry it all out and make sure you do it fast without forgetting anything, so we can get out of there and never look back."

"I can't wait sweetheart," Michelle kissed his chest. "Yesterday was such hell; I so hated going through it again."

"I hated it too baby, but it's over. You don't have to think about it anymore."

"I know I don't, but it's hard not to. Losing you is my worst nightmare and it almost happened… again… and this time it would've been forever."

"I know, I know," he kissed her hair, "but you didn't lose me. I'm right here and I'll bug you for a very, very long time."

"Good, I hope so."

"I was worried about you too, you know. Before you called me, before Jack told me what was going on and then even more when he did. I was so worried, so scared that something will happen to you, because my worst nightmare is same as yours… losing you, my love."

"You didn't lose me, and you never will. I'll bug you for a very, very long time too," Michelle kissed him.

"Good," he smiled. "I look forward to it."

They lay in one other's arms quietly for a while, enjoying feeling each other close, before Michelle continued.

"Good thing we finished all we had to do yesterday; and everything concerning my leaving is done too, since yesterday was my last day. All is done; I only have to grab my things."

"Yep, and then we'll be free to do what we wish."

"Vacation first, because I really want some time alone with you, without any interruptions. When our vacation is done, we'll be going to the diner for a while until we arrange everything we need for the store. After we open our store, we'll run it for a while and in the end our kids."

"Oh yeah, nothing will change our plans again."

"No baby, nothing will."

They remained in their bed for a long time, holding each other tightly, kissing and caressing, imagining their future together.

"Let's get something to eat," Tony said. "I'm now officially starving."

Michelle giggled and gently caressed him down his entire back, sending goose bumps down his spine, "only if you promise me we'll continue this tonight."

"I wouldn't get out of this bed all day, if you ask me," Tony grinned, "but we have a lot to do today. I promise you, we'll pick this up when we get home tonight," he gently kissed her neck, caressing her, sending same goose bumps down her spine.

They remained hugging for a bit longer; after getting dressed they went to the kitchen and prepared their breakfast.

"What are we going to do first?"

"I was thinking about going to Division right away. I want to get that over with."

"Good idea baby, sooner that's done, sooner we can leave it behind us."

"Yeah, my thoughts exactly," Michelle kissed him. "Then we should go to the mall, buy all the things we might during the next 10 days and eat lunch there."

"Good idea, then we can drop everything off home, walk to the diner and have dinner with Gianni and Gina. They're probably waiting for us to tell them what happened yesterday."

"Yeah, I'm sure they are. They sounded so freaked out about the whole situation. Good thing we called them when we got home."

"I know; I wasn't sure if I should do it, but I knew they saw what happened and I was sure they were worried about you. They were worried about me too. I didn't pick up the phone, since I wasn't home, so they were totally upset."

"Poor them, they'll be as happy about me leaving this job as you and I will be."

"Oh yeah," Tony smiled.

After finishing breakfast, Tony and Michelle did exactly as planned. Arriving home that evening they decided to watch TV for a while, since it was too early to go to bed yet.

"This was a long day," Tony said.

"It sure was, but I'm glad we got it all covered; now we don't have to think about Division anymore or anything else. All we have to do is pack before going to the cabin. The rest is all set."

"Yeah," Tony smiled; he lay down on couch pillows and pulled her down to him, leaning her back on his chest, wrapping his arms around her. "I can't wait to get up there. It will be wonderful, just you and me, without anyone else for ten whole days. No obligations, no phone calls, no nothing," he gently kissed her neck.

"I can't wait either baby; it will be amazing, just like it always is up there, especially because we'll be together. I don't care where we are, I just want to be alone with you, just you and me with nothing else on our mind for ten whole days."

"That's all I want too, just you and me baby," Tony replied.

Michelle flipped herself on her stomach remaining on top of him; she looked into his eyes kissing him. "It sounds like a dream, all of this does."

"It does, but it's not. This is how it will always be from now on. You and me, together forever; we'll be in charge what happens, and nothing will change that anymore."

"Oh yeah," Michelle smiled happily.

They remained like that kissing and caressing. Soon their kisses and caresses became hungrier and more passionate.

"I think it's time to pick up where we left off this morning," Tony said huskily.

"I think so too," Michelle replied, caressing his face. "How 'bout you call Jack first and ask him to come to dinner tomorrow night and I'll email Kim. That way we can see him tomorrow and have her reply to tell him about it."

Tony grunted, pretending to pout, but a couple of seconds later, he smiled.

Michelle kissed him, "If we do it all now, everything from our list will be done. We'll only have each other to think about."

"Good idea baby, I'll call him and you send that mail. But don't forget where we stopped."

"Believe me, I won't," Michelle winked.

They got up from the couch and went to their desk. Michelle sat down and turned her laptop on; Tony sat down next to her, took the phone and dialed Jack's number couple of times without any reply.

"No one's picking up," Tony said, looking worried. "Answering machine in his apartment is off too."

Michelle turned around and looked at her husband, "I'm sure he's okay baby," she gently squeezed his knee. "Don't worry, he'll pick up."

"You're right, he's probably fine; but if he doesn't pick up soon, I'll go by his place and check on him. He was too depressed about the whole Audrey situation when we left."

"Of course we'll check on him; I'll go with you. Just don't worry, everything will be fine."

"Yeah," Tony smiled, picking her hand up from his knee, he squeezed it tightly and kissed it.

An hour later, they still didn't hear from Jack. Tony tried his cell phone several times and left bunch of messages, but there was no reply. By now, Tony started panicking about his friend.

"He always checks his cell phone; something is probably up with him. He was so depressed when Audrey left. I haven't seen him in that state in a long time. I know he asked us to leave him alone, that he needs some time on his own, but…"

"Tony, he'll be fine. Want me to call Division and CTU to find out if he's there? You know him; he probably buried himself in work to forget about the rest of it."

"Sure honey, it's a good idea. Call Bill and Chloe, they'll help us if they can."

The only thing Michelle found out after finishing her two phone calls was that Jack had left half an hour after they did and no one had seen or heard from him since. That only made Tony worry more.

"I don't like this; I really don't. I should've done more for him; I shouldn't have left him alone," he shook his head. "Who knows where he's wandering on his own, all depressed."

Michelle got up and sat in Tony's lap, hugging him tightly, "Tony, this is in no way your fault, you didn't do anything wrong. He was depressed and in a bad mood, but since he didn't ask for your help, there was nothing you could've done. You know how he is."

"I know but…" Tony started again; Michelle stopped him by kissing him.

"Honey, stop worrying; it's only been an hour and half. Maybe his answering machine is off because he hasn't lived in that apartment for almost 2 years and he didn't turn it back on yet with all that's happened with Audrey. It's not like he was planning on moving back to his place any time soon. As for his cell phone, maybe he went out for some dinner and left it home, or he just needed to be alone and turned all the phones off. Remember when we had that misunderstanding and you couldn't reach me for hours?" Michelle asked; Tony nodded. "Remember how you were worried and I didn't shut you out on purpose either; maybe the same thing is happening with him. I'm sure he's fine." She caressed his face, "but, I'll tell you what, help me write this email and if he doesn't reply by then, we'll drive by his house and check on him. How does that sound?"

"Perfect," Tony smiled.

"Good, now please stop worrying, okay?"

"Okay sweetheart," he kissed her. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, so much."

Michelle started getting up, but Tony stopped her.

"You're staying right here," he said, not letting her out of his arms. "This is what laptops were made for."

He moved his laptop aside and pulled hers in front of them.

"See," he grinned.

"I see," she replied happily, kissing him. "Now, what should we write to Kim? We have no idea how much Jack told her about Audrey, or if he told her about her at all."

"I know. Just tell her that we had yet another bad day and that her father could use her company."

"Good idea, I'll tell her that he always mentions her, little Angela and Chase, that we think it would do him good to see them all."

"That sounds great. Write that."

Michelle started typing their email while Tony held her in his lap, leaning his head lightly on her back.

"Tony?"

"Yeah," he said sleepily.

"I'm done. Want to take a look?"

"I'm sure it's fine."

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just so comfortable here that I don't want to move," he replied.

Michelle giggled, "I know you are honey, but we have to send this and then find out where Jack is."

"You're right," Tony lifted his head and kissed her neck, "but when we're done, I'm not moving away from your arms. We are on vacation, aren't we?"

"Yes, we are. I'm not letting you out of my arms either, once we take care of all of this," Michelle replied, caressing his face. "Now look at this email and tell me if I forgot something."

"Nope, it looks great."

"Okay… sent. Now dial Jack again," Michelle said handing the phone to Tony.

"Still no reply… darn. What the heck am I supposed to do now? It's been almost two hours that we're trying to locate him and no one saw him hours before that."

"I know darling, I know. Listen, let's go check on him. I know you won't be calm until you make sure he's okay. It's late and we're both tired since yesterday wore us both out in more ways than one, but going to sleep now isn't an answer since I know you won't fall asleep until you find out what's up with him."

"I won't, but we might not find him at all. If he wants to be alone, who knows where he took off; we might not find out what happened to him for days. Who knows in what kind of trouble he got himself into by now?"

"We should find out if he checked out of the hotel where he was staying with Heller and Audrey. Try calling the hotel first, maybe they know something."

"Okay, that's a good idea. I'll do that first."

"Just calm down," Michelle caressed his face. "I know you're worried about him, but you did all you could, we both did."

"I know, I know," he smiled, "Where would I be without you?"

"You'd probably be lost," Michelle smiled back.

"Completely lost," Tony replied.

After hanging up with the hotel receptionist Tony wasn't any closer to locating his friend. He did, however, find out that Jack came to the hotel an hour ago, took his luggage and checked out.

"Now what?" he asked Michelle after telling her what he found out.

"Now we know he's alive and still in town. That's a progress too. I know we didn't locate him, but at least we know he's okay."

"True," Tony smiled. "I didn't think he'd do anything to himself; I just didn't like seeing him that way. It made me worry because he could end up in trouble when he's like that, and I wanted to help him in any way that I could."

"I know sweetheart, but when Jack says he doesn't need help, then he doesn't need help, no matter how obvious it is that he does. He'll never let you help him since he's so stubborn. You know him; you can't change his mind on anything."

"Yeah, he is one stubborn SOB," Tony chuckled.

"He sure is," Michelle giggled. "Now we'll wait for a bit longer and call his apartment. We'll worry later what we'll do if he doesn't reply, but I'm sure he will."

"Okay, but my butt fell asleep in this chair," Tony smiled. "Hold this," he gave her the phone's receiver and lifted himself up with Michelle still in his arms. Walking them to the couch, Tony gently sat them down and Michelle wrapped her arms around him even tighter.

"When we do find Jack we'll invite him to lunch, not dinner," she said.

"Lunch?"

"Yeah, that way we can have a whole night all to ourselves and pick up where we left off earlier today."

"Why wait for so long?" Tony grinned, gently flipping her on the couch, remaining on top of her. He started kissing her neck, "We still have some time before we start calling Jack again."

Michelle just giggled and caressed his back. Some time later, Tony's face came to hers and their eyes locked for a longest time. They just remained that way, staring into one another's eyes, gently kissing and caressing.

Some time later the phone rang.

"Hello?" Tony picked it up.

"Hey, Tony," he heard Jack's voice on the other end.

"Jack! Finally," Tony said, placing the phone on the speaker so Michelle can join the conversation.

"Where have you been?" she asked. "Tony and I have been worried sick about you. No one heard from you or saw you since yesterday. We only calmed down when we called the hotel and found out that you've been there."

"I'm sorry you guys; I had no idea you were looking for me. I was so upset about the whole situation that I needed to be on my own to clear my thoughts and I didn't think about anything else."

"It's fine, as long as you're okay. We're so sorry about what happened with Audrey, Jack," Tony said.

"Yeah, so am I, but I'll be okay," Jack replied, his voice sounding clearly depressed.

"That whole situation is the reason why we were looking for you in the first place, among other things. Michelle and I will be leaving on a short vacation day after tomorrow and we want you to come to have a lunch with us tomorrow. We want to see you before we go."

"I don't know…"

"Come on Jack, we're your friends, we're family. We want to talk to you and show you that you're not alone."

"Thanks you guys. I just don't think I'd be a good company, that's all."

"It doesn't matter, just come to our house for a while. We really want to see you and talk to you before we go. We didn't see you for months. Come on Jack, we won't bite you," Michelle said.

"Okay you guys, you win. See you tomorrow," Jack replied.

"See you tomorrow Jack."

After hanging up the phone, Michelle leaned her head on Tony's chest and he wrapped his arms around her.

"He sounds so depressed, doesn't he?" Tony said worriedly.

"Yeah, he does. He tried to hide it, but we both know him too well for it to work."

"This whole Audrey thing really kicked him hard."

"Yeah it did, I hope he'll be able to love again. He deserves it."

"I hope he will be too; he deserves to be happy. He'll never be as lucky as I am though. I got the best woman in the world."

"And I got the best man," Michelle gently caressed his face.

"I'm not really sure that he'll be able to fall in love again. First Terri, then he broke up with Kate because of Salazar case, then Audrey… I just don't know if he'll be able to go through it all again."

"I hope he will. There's nothing worse than being alone. Too bad his relationship with Kate didn't work, I really liked her. She was right for him."

"Yeah, she was, but he went undercover to that world and got addicted to drugs. The whole thing was complicated. Kate just didn't fit in it all."

"Maybe now she will. Who knows, maybe they'll see each other somewhere and…"

"Hey, Cupid, listen, don't try playing a match maker, okay?"

Michelle laughed, "I won't Tony, I promise. Not after last time."

"Oh yeah, Jack and Nadine disaster," Tony rolled his eyes.

"Poor Nadine, they were so wrong for each other."

"Oh yeah," Tony chuckled. "I wonder what happened to her."

"Didn't I tell you? She got married in Denver; she just had twins. I got an email from her the other day."

"That's good. After the disaster date with Jack, I didn't think she'd try dating ever again."

"Oh Tony," Michelle laughed, "I admit, I was wrong and I'll never do it again. He was lonely during one of his breakups with Kate and I thought he and Nadine will hit it off, but I was obviously wrong and I'll never do it again," she lifted her hand, "I promise."

Tony took her hand in his and kissed it, leaning it on his chest, intertwining their fingers. Nestling her head on his chest as well, Michelle continued, "I still think Jack and Kate were a great match. Even though they broke up couple of times during the time they were together and broke up in the end, I still think he was really happy with her."

"They were a pretty good match and Jack was quite happy with her. If it's meant to be, they'll find each other again somehow. If not, let's just hope Jack will find someone else."

"Yeah, let's hope so."

After they cuddled for a while, Tony gently flipped Michelle on her back; he started kissing and caressing her all over. "Since we found Jack sooner than we expected, I think we should go to bed and pick up where we left off this morning. What do you think?"

"Mmmm, I think that's a really good idea," Michelle replied, gently going with her fingers up and down his back.

Tony looked into her eyes, "I love you Michelle; I love you so much."

"I love you too Tony, so much," Michelle replied, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Tony kissed Michelle lovingly and gently slipped his arms under her, lifting her up in his arms; he carried her to their bed.


	19. Chapter 19

**Author note:** _I'm sorry for even longer delay on this chapter, offline world got in the way some more. I'll do my best to keep updates regular from now on, though they'll be coming each second month on this story from now on, because I'm starting with another story from next month. _

_I hope you'll enjoy __this chapter, let me know what you think._

It was sunny and beautiful the next morning when Tony and Michelle woke up. They remained lying in bed, wrapped in each other's arms for a long time, enjoying one another's company.

"I so don't want to get up," Michelle said.

"I don't want to get up either, but we have to get some lunch ready since we're having Jack over and we haven't even had breakfast."

"Of course we didn't. When I'm with you I forget about anything else. Food is the last thing on my when I'm in my gorgeous husband's arms," she said.

"I know; it's so hard to think about anything else when I have the most beautiful woman in the world in my arms," Tony replied. "It's enough to look at this beautiful face to forget everything else," he gently caressed her face.

"I am a bit hungry now that I think about it," Michelle continued some time later.

"I am too. Why don't I make us some breakfast and we'll talk about the rest of the things we have to do?"

"Okay honey, let's go."

Arriving in kitchen, Tony and Michelle decided on having banana frappes and ham and cheese sandwiches, which they made together.

"Why don't we eat outside on the back porch? It's so sunny and beautiful out."

"Good idea honey," Tony replied, taking their frappes, "You take the sandwiches."

They went outside and settled on the swing placing their food on the wooden table next to it.

"It's so nice out here today. If we find some time, maybe we could go swimming."

"Well, we could always make a quick lunch and go swimming before Jack gets here."

"That would be great," Michelle replied. "However, we should pack for our trip. We bought everything, and we should start packing if we want to leave tomorrow morning."

"You can always pack while I cook. We won't need too many clothes anyway," Tony said, kissing her neck.

"Oh you," Michelle giggled. "I could do that; there isn't much we need and we can't pack food now since it will spoil if it stays outside, it shouldn't take too long."

"Yeah, you're right; I doubt it will. I know cooking lunch won't take long."

"Then we can go swimming a bit."

"I think so. We can always go swimming after Jack leaves if we don't find time before. No one's expecting us at the cabin, so we don't have to leave first thing in the morning. We can do what we want, at our own pace."

"That sounds so great. I can't believe it's finally over," Michelle smiled kissing him.

"I can't believe it either honey; I'm so happy about it," Tony replied.

"Let's eat, I am now officially starving," Michelle said.

Tony just chuckled and handed her one of the frappes, kissing the top of her head.

They ate happily while flirting constantly. When they were done Tony and Michelle remained cuddling in their swing for a while.

"I better check if Kim sent me the email first. It would be nice if she did, that way we might have some news that will cheer up poor Jack."

"Good idea. Go check and I'll start cooking."

When they got up Michelle went to her laptop to check her mail and Tony went to the kitchen to see what he'd prepare for their lunch.

"What do you feel like eating, dear?" Tony asked.

"I'm sure I'll like whatever you choose," Michelle replied.

"Okay, how does spaghetti carbonara and some grilled meat sound? I haven't put the ones we bought yesterday in deep freeze yet, so I could grill them."

"Mmm, sounds yummy." Michelle smiled.

Tony laughed, "Okay, it's settled then."

Tony got all the ingredients out and started preparing their meal. When Michelle logged into her mail she found an email from Kim.

"Tony, Kim replied."

"She did? What did she say?"

"She says that everything is great with her and Chase. Angela is growing and getting cutter by the day. They'll come to see Jack, that's good."

"Yeah, that is good."

"Kim says they were planning on it anyway. They'll only do it a bit sooner now."

"Great, Jack will be glad."

"Finally something that will make him happy; I'll just tell her that we'll be happy to see them and that we can't wait to see little Angela; and to tell us exactly when they'll be coming, of course, so we can pick them up. Do you want to add something?"

"No baby, that sounds great."

"Okay, I signed us both."

"Perfect."

"Sent."

She turned her laptop off and walked to Tony, wrapping her arms around him, kissing the nape of his neck.

"I love watching you cook. You're so cute."

"I thought I'm always cute," Tony turned around in her arms and frowned jokingly. "Like you are," he rubbed her nose with his.

"Of course you are," Michelle smiled, "but you're just a bit cutter when you're cooking."

"I'll have to think when you're cutter, because each time I look at you I find you more and more irresistible."

"Need my help?" Michelle asked couple of minutes later when they broke their hug.

"Didn't you want to go pack our bags?"

"Yeah, but I want to do everything with you. I don't want to leave your side for a single second, at least until our vacation is over."

"Sounds perfect, only if you promise me you won't leave my side for one second even after our vacation is over."

"I promise," Michelle kissed him. "Now, what can I do?"

"Well let's see… There's no way I'm letting you anywhere near anything flammable, we don't want the house to burn," Tony joked. "I don't know if I should let you chop this bacon or onions; I don't want you to chop your fingers off," he grinned.

Michelle started tickling him, making him jump and burst out laughing.

"Okay, okay, I give up. You can chop these for now and you can help me make the sauce for the spaghetti later when you're done. I'll deal with the steaks while you do it."

"Good, I didn't want to use stronger force on you," Michelle giggled.

"You can do what you want with me later," Tony kissed her.

For the next half an hour Tony and Michelle cooked their lunch, joking and flirting constantly. When they were finished, they moved to the wardrobe to select what they would take on their trip. Packing took longer than either of them expected and it was far more complicated. After finishing it all, Tony and Michelle crashed on the couch.

"Who knew packing can be so exhausting?" Michelle sighed.

"Yeah, I feel like a truck kicked me and we were sure it would take only couple of minutes," Tony chuckled.

"We'll never think that again." Michelle giggled. "I don't feel like swimming right now. I'm too tired. We really need to clean that wardrobe; we have way too much junk piled up in there."

"Yeah, that will be first thing on our list when we come back home. I am too tired to go swimming too, we'll go after lunch."

"Okay, sounds good. Now that we're done with everything we have plenty of time to do whatever we want… want a back rub?"

"Only if I can give you one later," Tony replied.

"You're on," Michelle kissed him.

For the next 45 minutes Tony and Michelle massaged each other, getting all the tension out of their muscles. When they were done, both were completely relaxed again.

"Mmmm, this was good," Michelle sighed happily, resting her head on Tony's chest.

"We need to do hard work more often, so we can do this more often too," Tony chuckled.

"Oh yeah," Michelle giggled.

Tony and Michelle remained cuddling until they heard the door bell ringing.

"Jack's here," Tony said.

"You go open the door. I'll start setting the table."

Opening the door Tony greeted his friend and let him in. It was obvious on Jack's face how miserable he was, even though he tried to hide it.

"Hey Jack," Michelle waved from the kitchen.

"Hey, Michelle; How are you?"

"I'm great Jack, really great. We didn't have too much time to talk during all that hell."

"No, but we'll make up for it today and when you guys come back."

"Yeah, we will. You two sit on the couch. I'll set the table; we'll be able to eat in a few minutes."

"So, how are you?" Tony asked his friend. "You got us both worried yesterday."

"Yeah Jack, we were worried sick when we couldn't find you. You looked so down when we left that we felt guilty for leaving you alone," Michelle added as she placed the plates on the table.

"You guys didn't have to feel guilty about anything. First, my messed up personal life isn't your fault; plus you didn't do anything wrong. You asked if I needed your help and I declined so… I know how worried you both are about me, but I'm a big boy, I'll manage. I've been dumped before," Jack smiled weakly.

"You don't have to put on an act for us Jack. I know how much this hurt your feelings. I saw you two together, remember? You and I go way back for this to work," Tony said.

"I know you pretty well too, Jack; and you're not fooling me either. So just talk to us."

"You are both right, I'm miserable. I haven't felt this way in a long time. I just don't want to talk about it right now. I hadn't seen you in a while and right now I'm okay, so why don't we just eat and we can talk about it later, huh? You guys can tell me about what you were up to during all this time instead."

Tony and Michelle looked at each other knowing it will be hard to make him open up and talk to them about anything personal. Since they also knew how stubborn he was, they just dropped it for the time being.

"Okay Jack, you win." Michelle said, "Table is set. Let's eat."

Jack walked to the table and sat down while Tony and Michelle finished preparing the meal. They placed the food on the table and Tony went to get some ice for the drinks.

"What are we having?" Jack asked, couple of minutes later when all three were seated.

"Tony made spaghetti carbonara and some juicy steaks."

"Steaks sound good, but what is this spaghetti thing with? It looks gooey and I see some bits sticking from it."

Both Tony and Michelle laughed on that, knowing how much their friend doesn't like trying new food.

"It won't bite you Jack," Tony joked, "those are bits of bacon and onions in cream sauce with cheese. Gianni taught me how to make it."

"It's delicious," Michelle added. "I never tried it before I met Tony, now it's my favorite meal. That and lasagna, of course. Then again pizza they make is…" Michelle kissed the top of her fingers, "yummy."

Tony laughed and kissed her, "I love how you love talking about food."

Michelle giggled, "What can I do? You, Gianni and Gina completely spoiled me. Especially you, you're an amazing cook. I was never much of a big eater until I met you."

"I'm so glad to see you enjoying food again and to see you so happy."

"I get more and more reasons to be happy every day," Michelle kissed him, "you're as happy."

"I have as many reasons to be; I have you, don't I?" he whispered in her neck. Michelle just smiled rubbing her cheek against his.

"Jack, since you don't want to talk to us about what happened, we have so much to tell you about… Jack?"

Tony and Michelle looked at Jack worriedly. When he didn't make any of his usual wise comments to tease them, as always when they started acting romantic or mentioned Tony and cooking in one sentence, they both knew he wasn't hiding his pain as well as he thought he was. He didn't even look up when they called his name; he was picking at his food with his fork and looked like he didn't hear a single word they said.

"Jack, we're sorry for being this way; we didn't want to put you down with it. We just decided to act normally since you didn't want to talk to us about... You okay? Jack!" Tony called him.

"What?" Jack looked up, looking totally absent, like he had no idea what was going on.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why?"

"You didn't make your usual wise comments. You also didn't reply to us when we called you and talked to you. You didn't hear a word we said, did you?" Michelle asked.

"No, I'm sorry. You lost me after you explained what's in this food."

"Oh, Jack," both Tony and Michelle sighed.

"It's delicious, we better eat it before it gets cold…" he tried to hide how he was feeling again, so he started eating and stopped talking.

"Jack…" Tony tried.

"I told you I wouldn't be a good company. Let's just enjoy our meal, okay?"

"Okay Jack, but we really want to help you in any way we can," Michelle said. "You know that, right? We're not forcing you to talk about it because we enjoy torturing you, but because we care about you and don't want you to suffer on your own. We want you to share how you feel with us so we can help you, if we can, or at least be here for you and listen to you. You're not alone Jack, you have us. We're your family; you know that."

"Yeah, Michelle," he smiled a bit. "You two are my family. I also know what you're both trying to do and I appreciate it, but there's nothing you can do. Audrey left with her husband and I have to deal with it on my own."

"I'm so sorry Jack, I know how much it must've hurt you, but it's not because she didn't love you…" Tony tried.

"I know, but she didn't love me enough to choose me, she chose Paul, so let's just drop it."

"Jack… she just realized she had feelings for her husband, feelings she didn't think she had anymore and she couldn't ignore them. You do know it's better that she left with him, don't you?" Michelle added.

"That's what I've been trying to tell myself too, but it still hurts, it hurts like hell. I never wanted to fall in love again, because I knew something would go wrong. Then I met her and I thought nothing would this time… Boy, was I wrong, huh?"

"She loves you Jack, a lot. That much I managed to see during the time we talked to each other. But, she obviously realized that our way of life isn't something she could handle and seeing you doing your job upset her too much. If she can't handle it, if it's too stressful for her, then it's better that she's with her husband living a more peaceful life. Especially since she obviously still has strong feelings for him; it's better that she left, for all of your sakes," Michelle said. "I know it hurts you right now, but I know you know I'm right."

"I know you are Michelle, that's exactly what I said to myself so many times by now. Even though it hurts me to admit it, she'll probably be happier with him too. It's just that I was ready to leave this life for her and live the way I did in Washington."

"You still can. There's no reason for you to live like this. You can try doing what Michelle and I decided to do."

"What did you guys decide to do? You mentioned something but…"

"We'll start our own small IT store/company and then spread it a bit. If spreading it doesn't work, we'll stay on the beginning business."

"That's an excellent idea; I know you'll do great. Seeing you today… I can tell you're as happy as you used to be. I'm so glad for you."

"Thanks Jack, but my point was… You can do it too," Tony said.

"What can I possibly do away from the life I'm used to and what's the point?"

"The point is you can be happier in some other field, moving away from that hell could make you as happy as we know it will make us. You can open your security company. I'm sure our store will need security and who's better in that?" Michelle suggested.

"That sounds like something I could do. I'll definitely think about that, but right now I'm too down to think about anything."

"Yeah, we can see that, we'll discuss it all in time," Michelle said. "Just know we're here for you, no matter what you decide to do. We're family, remember?"

"Yeah, we are," Jack replied; smiling a bit again. "Let's eat now, this is so delicious."

"I told you," Michelle giggled.

For a while they just enjoyed their meal. When they were done, they moved back to the living room; Jack sat on one couch while Tony and Michelle curled up next to each other on the other one.

"I do have some good news for you," Michelle said.

"What?"

"Tony and I emailed Kim last night."

"Kim?"

"Yeah, your daughter. I know you're getting old and forgetful, but I didn't think it's so serious that you'd forget your own daughter's name," Tony said jokingly.

"Haha, very funny, wise guy. Why did you mail her? What did she say?"

"When we saw how depressed you were, we decided to email her and see if she'd come for a visit," Michelle said.

"Really? What did she say?"

"She said they were planning to come anyway in couple of months, but now they'll come earlier," Tony replied.

"Really?" Jack replied, looking happy for the first time since he came. "When?"

"In two weeks."

"That's so great. Thanks you guys; you really are the best family a guy could wish for."

"It's no problem, Jack; we were more than happy to do it, knowing how much it would cheer you up. We only told her we had another bad day and how seeing them would make you feel better. She saw it on TV already and guessed you were involved because of Heller. We didn't mention Audrey or any of that; we decided to leave that to you," Michelle said.

"Good, I didn't tell her much of anything about Audrey. She was so fond of Kate; I think they still keep in touch. I wanted to go visit them with Audrey and tell them, but that's not going to happen."

"Jack, try not to think about Audrey constantly. I know how hard it is, but think about other happier things. You'll see your daughter and granddaughter soon," Tony said.

"Yeah, at least something I'll look forward to during these next two weeks."

"Want us to stay with you?" Michelle asked.

"Of course not, I'll be okay. You guys go to the cabin. You probably want some time on your own without any interruptions to celebrate the fact that Michelle's not working in Division anymore and you should have it. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure? We care about you; you're like a family to us. As we told you so many times already, and we want to be there for you. Our trip can wait; if you need us just say so."

"Yes, I'm sure. I know you do and I care about you both too. You guys know that aside from Kim and her family, you're my only family. I really appreciate your care but, I'll be fine. Besides I need some time on my own to clear my head."

"Okay, Jack. We could all go up there together one of these days, maybe even take Kim and her family too."

"That sounds great; we'll talk to Kim about it when she comes."

"Oh and Jack, don't forget to call her, we told her you would. She wanted to call you on her own, but she decided to wait for your call."

"I'll call her first thing tomorrow morning."

Tony and Michelle still held each other tightly and gently stroked one another's arms without realizing it.

"You two look so great and so happy again. I love seeing you like this."

"Thanks Jack, we're really happy," Tony replied kissing Michelle's hair.

"Good, after all that hell you deserve to be. What are your plans now?"

"First we'll open our company, then we'll let it run for a while and then…" Michelle smiled.

"What?"

"We decided to have a baby, maybe even two," Michelle said happily.

"That's great. I always thought you two should be parents, you'll both do an amazing job."

"Thanks, Jack," Michelle replied.

"It will be a while before it all happens though. First we have to deal with our business and run it for a period of time, to see how it goes. While we grow our business, we'll build a nursery too, so it's all ready for our baby," Tony added, gently caressing his wife's face. "We'll make the nursery big, so in case we get lucky enough to have two kids, we can split it in half."

"Sounds like you two decided on everything."

"Yeah, pretty much," Tony nodded.

"That's great, what exactly will you do in your store?"

"We didn't tell you?" Michelle asked.

"Not in details, since we haven't talked much over the last few months. You told me now it will be an IT store, but that's all I know."

"Yeah, we wanted to tell you in person. It will be an IT store where we'll sell computers, computer parts and equipment, plus we'll offer computer repair service and if we find a right location we'll even have computer courses. We were also thinking about expanding it all to different kind of tech products, like TVs, cameras, cell phones… but we'll start with computers first," Michelle said.

"Wow, sounds great."

"Let's hope it will be."

"Of course it will be honey," Michelle kissed the top of her husband's nose.

"Yeah, it will be," Tony smiled.

"Did you guys hear from Robert?" Jack asked.

"Oh yeah, couple of days ago. He and Tess are traveling with her parents, but they decided to come back home in couple of months and to settle down in LA," Tony replied.

"What? No more adventures, no more trips all over the world?"

"Nope."

"Wow."

"See Jack, if they can change their life, so can you. Think about that company. It would be nice; maybe you can even start it with Chase. He was good at his job and he's between jobs constantly lately."

"Yeah, that's a good idea. I'm sure they'd both like the idea; I'll definitely think about it, but right now..."

"I'm sure you'll be fine Jack. You'll find someone else one day, you'll see," Michelle smiled.

"Just promise me you won't try to hook me up with anyone else," Jack frowned.

Both Tony and Michelle started laughing and said at the same time, "Poor Nadine."

"I know you had my best interests at heart, but that woman didn't like what I do at all; she nearly freaked out when she heard some of the things I did, and I didn't even go in full details. She was nice but…"

"I never would've guessed that she'd freak out. We knew each other for a while before I even mentioned you. I didn't tell her in details about what we do since we mostly talked about other things, but I still had no idea."

"You couldn't have known; besides I wasn't ready for a date. Kate and I broke up only a week before that for the nth time, so…"

"That's why I tried."

"I know Michelle, you wanted to help me and I appreciate it; just promise me you won't try anymore, please," Jack joked.

"Tony already made me promise," Michelle giggled, "but I promise again, I'll never again hook you up with anyone, ever…."

"Good," both Jack and Tony laughed.

"Some last day you had, huh Michelle?"

"Oh yeah, I came so close to lose my husband again," she wrapped her arms tightly around Tony, leaning her head on his chest.

"You did the right thing, Michelle," Jack said.

"That's what I told her about 50 times already, but you know her, always worried," Tony kissed the top of her head.

"I know I did the right thing, you two, but that doesn't make it any easier for me to digest what I had to do or what I could've lost if Tony was in that car," Michelle gently caressed her husband's face. "It was a day from hell and I wish it didn't have to happen that way. But, we're finally done with that world and I got to keep my husband, that's all that matters."

"Yeah, who would cook for us," Jack joked.

All three of them laughed on that.

"I was happy to see you're okay too, my friend," Jack said, "even though my love life went downhill, this day could've ended a whole lot worse."

"Yeah, it could've and your love life will improve too Jack, you'll see," Tony replied.

"I won't hold my breath," Jack sighed sadly, "but let's not talk about any of that anymore. It's getting late. I came to eat lunch with you and it's almost dinner time," he got up.

"You don't have to leave yet," Michelle said. "You can always stay some more and eat dinner with us, we'd love to have you."

"I know, but I'm tired and I'm still full from lunch. I need to get some sleep. I'm going to my old place, you have my number and I have yours; we'll talk soon."

"Okay Jack, have a good night," Tony and Michelle said, walking him to the door.

"Thanks for everything you two, see you soon."

"See you."

When they closed the door after their friend, Tony wrapped his arms around his wife.

"Did I tell you recently how much I love you and how lucky I am to have you in my life?"

Michelle smiled, kissing him. "Did I tell you?"

Tony gently kissed her in reply.

"Poor Jack," Tony continued couple of minutes later when they moved back to the couch.

"I know; he's so depressed. He keeps trying to hide it and duck the conversation but…"

"You did pretty well, making him talk."

"I tried my best, I just wanted to help him in any way I could," Michelle replied.

"You did great honey," Tony caressed her face.

"You did too. There's nothing more we can do anyway, aside from being there for him."

"No, there isn't. We did our best; it's up to him to come to us if he needs us. We'll just be there for him whenever that might happen and for whatever other reason he might need us."

"As always," Michelle smiled.

"Are you hungry? Tony asked.

"No, I'm still pretty full from lunch. Are you?"

"No, I'm not; I'm still pretty full too."

"What do you want to do?"

"Since either of us is hungry, I want to see my beautiful wife in a swimsuit," Tony replied.

"And I want to see my gorgeous husband in his swimsuit too."

An hour and a half later, coming out of the sea, Tony sat down on the towel; Michelle straddled him, kissing him passionately. She then gently pushed him down and started kissing him from his neck down to his chest.

"I love kissing the sea off of you; you're even tastier than usual," she said slowly kissing and caressing him, making his skin break into goose bumps wherever her lips and fingertips touched it.

"Mmmm, and I love when you're doing it," Tony barely managed to whisper, as she continued with her loving kisses and caresses, "I just love it even more when I'm doing it to you."

"Patience, it's my turn first," Michelle smiled.

After enjoying his wife's kisses for a while, Tony unhooked the top of her bikini and took it off.

"I love the privacy we have here thanks to these rocks. People don't bother coming on this side since these rocks completely block the rest of the beach. I've been coming here since I was a young boy, as you know, and I've never seen anyone else here. I doubt many people even know about it or try to get to the other side, especially now because of our house. They probably think its private property. This way we have a private beach just for the two of us," Tony said, gently flipping her on her back, "and I can do this without worrying that someone might see us," he grinned, kissing her from her neck down.

"Mmmm, you're so not fair. It was still my turn," Michelle frowned jokingly, going with her fingers through his hair.

"I want to enjoy doing the same thing to you now, besides, you'll get your turn again," Tony replied between the kisses.

"Mmmm, I so hate interrupting you, but shouldn't we get going? It's probably passed 10 by now, we still have to eat dinner and get some sleep. We have a very long ride ahead of us tomorrow. Maybe we should go, no matter how much I don't want to stop this," she said sometime later while gently going up and down his back with tips of her fingers.

Her gentle touches made Tony's skin break into goose bumps; he stopped his kisses, smiling to her lovingly.

She cupped his face and gently caressed it with her thumbs. They looked into each other's eyes for a longest moment, both seeing the immense love shining through them.

"I don't feel like stopping either. I want to take you home and feed you. Then take a nice long shower with you, then rub some lotion all over your body and then..." he continued later and kissed her neck, sending goose bumps all over her body. "We can sleep for as long as we want and drive up there tomorrow afternoon, my love. We have all the time in the world."

Instead of replying, Michelle wrapped her arms around her husband's neck, pulling him down to her, kissing him passionately.


	20. Chapter 20

**Author note:**_I'm sorry for another delay on this chapter. Offline world got in a way for both me and my beta reader. I felt like writing nothing but fluff this time, so this chapter is pure fluffiness all the way. I hope you'll enjoy it and please let me know what you think._

A loud noise, in combination with her usual nightmare, woke Michelle, making her sit up in bed.

She shook her head and thought how crazy she was for believing her nightmare was real.

Without opening her eyes, Michelle moved her hand on the bed, trying to calm her racing heart by caressing her husband, only to realize that he wasn't there. She opened her eyes and looked around the house, but didn't see him anywhere; she called his name, but he didn't answer or come. Knowing that wasn't his usual behavior and still under the influence of her nightmare, Michelle found herself starting to panic.

Seeing it was raining, made her panic even more because it rained on the night of her last day of work, on that horrible night when she thought she lost him forever.

For a second she was sure her husband was gone.

Michelle knew this wasn't true, because she remembered all the things they did since that night. Even though the rational part of her mind told her that he was safe and sound and couldn't be anywhere far, memories of her nightmare and everything they went through didn't let her be at peace.

Michelle got out of the bed and walked around the house looking for her husband; she opened the bathroom door and didn't find him in there either. She went to the fridge and looked for a message he might've left for her, the way he always did on rare occasions when he would go somewhere and leave her sleeping. Knowing he wouldn't leave without notifying her first, not finding it made her panic even more. Michelle went to the living room and sat on the edge of the couch trying to calm herself down. _"He's okay,"_ she kept repeating to herself, _"he's not in that prison anymore, none of his injuries were fatal. He didn't die in that explosion; he's home. He'll be back in a minute. It was just a nightmare, that's all it was. So what if it's raining, a couple of days passed since that night. We were home since and did so many things together; he wasn't killed. Tony is fine; this was only a thunder and a bad dream. He's fine; he'll be home in a minute."_

Because of her nerves, Michelle didn't hear her husband opening the sliding glass door and coming inside. Another loud clap of thunder made her jump.

"Hey, hey, calm down, it's only thunder," she heard his voice behind her. "There's a storm outside. Didn't you notice? Are you okay, sweetheart?"

Michelle turned around to see Tony soaked to the skin, standing by the sliding glass door. She smiled and hurried to him, wrapping her arms tightly around him, "You're okay," she kept repeating between kisses.

"Of course I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be?" he asked, gently caressing her back. "I'm totally soaked; I'll get you all wet."

"I don't care," she said with her face buried in his neck.

"You're shivering; are you okay?"

Michelle looked into his eyes, "I went to caress you to calm myself down when the thunder woke me up and scared me. I didn't know what it was at first, but you weren't there. Your side of the bed was empty. I looked for you around the house, but I couldn't find you anywhere and it made me panic. I couldn't help myself because of… forget it, I'm just crazy. I'm okay now."

"Oh baby," Tony kept caressing her back. "You had that same nightmare again, didn't you? It's not just the thunder; that's what really freaked you out so much, isn't it? Thunder only made you think of that explosion and everything else collided, didn't it?"

Michelle just nodded in his neck.

"We talked about this so many times by now, everything is fine and I'm fine."

"I know, but my subconscious needs more persuading, especially because material for the nightmare keeps adding up. You woke up with couple of nightmares yourself."

"Yeah, I did, we both did. One of them woke me up before too, but it's all over now sweetheart. There won't be any more material for our nightmares and these will fade away in time."

"I know and I'm so happy about it."

"So am I honey. Are you better now?"

"I'm great," Michelle replied, kissing the top of his nose. "Where were you? You're soaked."

"We left our sun umbrella opened on the porch yesterday and it flew off. I caught it on the beach though, right before it went into the ocean."

"Oh baby, we could've bought a new one; you didn't have to run after it."

"I know, but the thunder in combination with a nightmare woke me up too. You know we fell asleep on the couch while watching TV, right?"

"Yeah, of course, waking up in bed instead of on the couch surprised me, but I figured you took me to bed. Not finding you next to me or anywhere in the house freaked me out, made me think our current life was a dream and the horrible dream was… fortunately it wasn't. I'm so glad you're okay."

"Of course I am. You won't get rid of me so easily. When I woke up, you were sound asleep and I didn't feel like waking you. Knowing you needed the rest; I carried you to the bed so you would be more comfortable. I watched you sleeping for awhile to calm myself from my own nightmare. Sometime later my eyes started closing again too, but a gust of wind opened one of the windows, so I got up to close them all. I saw the umbrella taking off while checking if the sliding glass door were fully closed. I just ran after it without thinking. Even though I'm soaked to my skin, it was fun," he grinned.

"You could've gotten hurt. You okay?" she asked, examining him.

"Honey, I'm fine. Nothing could've hurt me and nothing did," he said.

"Okay, you'll have to forgive your crazy wife, but I can't help worrying about you. I love you so much."

"I love you too, my crazy wife, so much. Since we're both soaked now," he said lifting her in his arms, "we're going to take a nice, long bath together and then I'll make us something for dinner."

"Sounds like a plan," she replied, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck.

"We have to decide what we'll do with our trip too," Tony said, carrying her to the bathroom. "We already postponed leaving this morning because of the bad weather, thinking it would get better by tonight, but it doesn't look like it will any time soon. I don't feel like going up there with all this rain."

"I don't either; it's not fun when all around you is just mud."

"Well, that would mean we wouldn't leave the cabin during the entire trip and that isn't such a bad option either."

Michelle giggled, kissing his neck.

"Then again, we can always stay here. Let the machine pick up our calls and not tell anyone we're here. It would be like we're in the cabin, and since this weather is limiting our options up there, we would have more things to do here and we'd be closer to civilization," Tony said, putting her down next to the hot tub. "I don't like the idea of being stranded up there for days."

Michelle giggled, "That wouldn't happen, but staying here is a good option too. We're on vacation; it doesn't matter where we are, as long as we're together," she smiled, kissing him gently. Turning around Michelle turned the water on and added their favorite bubble bath to the tub. As water and bubbles were filling the tub, she turned back to her husband, wrapping her arms around his waist. "I don't want anyone to know we're here though; I want you all to myself for the next ten days."

"That's exactly what I want too. We can always go to the cabin for a day or two when the weather improves up there. Remember what the weather report said, it will probably rain for the next 5 days up there," he said, kissing the top of her nose.

"Yeah I know; I kind of hoped they were wrong, but looks like they weren't. We should definitely stay here, at least until the weather improves," Michelle said, sliding her hands under his wet shirt, slowly taking it off. Leaving his chest bare, she gently started kissing and caressing it. She then continued taking the rest of his clothes off, creating goose bumps on his skin wherever her lips and fingers touched it.

"Mmmm, not fair, you still have all your clothes on," Tony joked as she gently kept kissing and caressing him. Michelle reached his lips and kissed him, "then take it off," she whispered in his ear.

She didn't have to tell him twice, Tony slowly started taking her clothes off, applying same gentle kisses and caresses all over her skin, creating the same goose bumps on his way.

When they both were completely naked, Tony and Michelle stood next to the hot tub for a while longer, waiting for it to fill up, and holding one another tightly.

"I love you," she whispered in his ear. "My nightmare scares me so much each time and it will whenever I dream it, because it keeps showing my biggest fear… losing you and I couldn't survive it."

"I couldn't survive losing you either and there's nothing I'm afraid of more, but you won't lose me; I'll be with you forever. We'll grow old together surrounded with our children, grandchildren and grand-grandchildren. They'll all tease us and call us 'love birds' because we'll be as in love when we're 90 as we are now. We'll probably die together in our late nineties, asleep in our bed, wrapped in each other's arms, because we'd both suffer if the other died first."

"That sounds perfect, even though sixty plus years in your arms isn't long enough, eternity wouldn't be long enough. The way you described our future is perfect and it's exactly how I want it to happen," Michelle kissed him passionately.

"I love you," Tony replied. He got inside the tub, helping her to get in too.

When they settled themselves inside the hot tub, Michelle leaned her back on his chest and Tony wrapped his arms around her.

"This feels so nice," Michelle sighed happily.

"Oh yeah, we should soak in the hot tub more from now on. We totally neglected it thanks to everything that happened during the past months."

Michelle smiled, kissing his neck, "since I'm not working at Division anymore, we'll spend all our time together, doing what we want."

"I still can't believe it. I can't believe that part of our life is finally over."

"I can't believe it either, but it's finally true. We'll finally be able to do what we dreamed about during all those months."

"Oh yeah, I can't believe I won't have to worry about losing you to that job anymore. The hours you spent working there alone were like torture to me. All I could think about were ways I could lose you. It was killing me that there was nothing I could do to protect you while you were there. All I could do was sit on my hands and hope I won't lose you," Tony gently went with his fingers across her breasts and stomach. Wrapping his arms around her, he buried his face in her neck, "I don't know what I'd do without you," he whispered.

"Oh baby, there was no reason for you to lose me. I spent the entire time during these last couple of months in the office," she caressed his hair. "Besides, I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself."

"I know you can, better than a lot of people, but what can I do? I love you too much and will never stop being concerned for you. But now, I'll finally have you all to myself again and I'll keep you safe; no more dangerous missions, no more dangerous life… Quiet family life only, from now on, with a small, safe family business and couple of kids," he smiled.

"Sounds perfect," Michelle replied.

Tony picked up the sponge and gently started washing Michelle with it, kissing and caressing her in the process.

When he was done, he asked, "Want me to wash your hair?"

"Of course," she smiled, "but then you'll let me do all of this to you."

"You know how much I'm looking forward to that," Tony smiled sitting behind her again; he picked up the shampoo and after gently soaping her hair, he slowly washed the soap out.

"All done," he said, pulling her into his embrace again, "but I changed my mind. I'm not letting you out of my arms."

"It's my turn now," Michelle giggled, slapping his hand lightly, "you can hold me later."

"Okay," he frowned jokingly and released her from his arms.

Michelle turned around and kissed him passionately, "you can do what you want with me, after I'm done with you."

She then picked up the same sponge and started washing his chest and arms, slowly caressing him in the process.

When she was done with his chest, stomach and arms, Michelle went behind him and gently washed his back. She could see how much he was enjoying it and how relaxed he was, so she took her time. When she was done, she gently pulled his head backward and soaped his hair with the same shampoo he used on her and washed his hair.

When Michelle was done, she pulled him into her arms, "I want to hold you, just for a bit," she said, kissing his neck. "Then you can hold me again; I just love feeling your weight on top of me."

"Okay, though I don't want to crush you, since you're so tiny," he grinned.

"Crush me, huh?" Michelle laughed, tickling him under his ribs.

After they both stopped laughing, they shared a passionate kiss. Michelle then pulled him back in her arms and he leaned his head on her shoulder.

"I love you," she whispered in his ear, wrapping her arms tightly around him. "You're my whole life."

"I love you too baby. My life isn't worth living without you," Tony replied. He slightly turned and looked into her eyes, "You're not thinking about your last day at work again, are you?"

"I'm doing my best not to but… I'll stop," she smiled.

"Come here," Tony replied, he moved out of her arms and scooted next to her.

He then gently pulled her in his arms; Michelle climbed in Tony's lap and wrapped her arms around him.

"I can't stop thinking about all the times I almost lost you either," he confessed. "We came close so many times to being as alone as poor Jack, and I can't stop thinking what would have happened to the other if one of us had been lost forever."

"I don't know what would happen. I don't know how I would even survive losing you."

"I don't either," he kissed top of her head. "When I see Jack so miserable, I keep thinking how happy he was when Terri was alive. He was a different man; I can't help but admire his strength to keep going despite all the things that happened to him."

"He has a daughter that needs him even though she's an adult."

"That's true. I do believe you and I are as strong and I do believe we'd keep going too."

"I'm sure we would, but it wouldn't be much of a life and I don't want to think about it anymore," Michelle said. "We're staying together and we have so many things to plan and think about. There's no need to dwell in the past. The future is what we need to think about now and nothing which could possibly make us lose one another will happen ever again," she smiled, making him smile too.

"You're right," he kissed her. "Good thing we bought this hot tub, because even though it's warm outside, we'd be two giant prunes by now."

"Oh yeah," Michelle giggled, leaning her head on his shoulder.

They held each other tightly for a while, kissing and caressing.

"I want you," she whispered in his ear.

"I want you too, my love," Tony replied, kissing her passionately.

Michelle wrapped her arms around his neck, straddling him. She slowly lowered herself down as Tony gently eased himself inside her, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her as close to him as possible.

They made love slowly, enjoying every second of it. Sometime later, Tony and Michelle got out of the tub. Tony grabbed a big towel and wrapped it around them both.

"What do you want to do now?" he asked.

"This," she smiled. "I don't want to leave your arms all day."

"That can be arranged, since we're on vacation and it's pouring outside. I won't let you out of my sight for a second."

"Mmm, that's the biggest reason why I love rainy weekends and holidays; we get to spend all day inside, wrapped in each other's arms" she kissed him, leaning her head on his chest.

They remained that way for a while, not saying anything, simply enjoying each other's closeness.

After some time Michelle looked at her husband and her eyes fell on his still showing bruises.

"Do these still hurt you?" she gently caressed his eye and lip.

"No baby," Tony replied gently.

"And this?" she placed her arm on top of stun gun wound on his chest.

Tony shook his head looking at her lovingly, "no."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure," he took her hand, kissing her fingers gently, one by one. "Stop worrying."

"It's not that easy, but I'll do my best," she smiled.

"Want me to dry your hair?"

"Of course," she replied. "Do you even have to ask?"

Tony smiled, kissing her. After he unwrapped them from the towel, Tony went to the bedroom and got their bathrobes. Tony helped Michelle to put hers on and then he dressed himself in his. He then sat her down on the bathroom stool, got the blow-dryer out and started drying her hair, kissing and playing with her curls in the process.

Arriving in the kitchen sometime later, Tony and Michelle made their dinner.

After finishing eating and cleaning up half an hour later, they moved to their favorite armchair and snuggled up in each other's arms.

"Do you remember the first night we spent together?"

"How can I forget?" Tony replied. "It was the best night of my life, beginning of the rest of my life. I was never happier I had termites in my apartment. Why?"

Michelle giggled, kissing him. "I don't know why I remember it. I guess when I come close to losing you; I go back to the first days we spent together and those three amazing years we spent together before that day. Those times kept me going while you were in prison, all the happy moments we created together and the idea of having all of it back once you come out. I went to them even after I thought I'd never see you again."

"I went to them constantly too, they kept me going in there," Tony kissed her. "Those were the happiest years of my life… up to that point. We'll spend many years together and make new wonderful memories. We already started."

"Yeah, we did," she kissed him back. "I still can't believe how much time passed since our first night together, six years."

"Six most incredible years, I wouldn't change a day," Tony smiled.

"I would," Michelle replied, "but only two."

"Those two days I don't count because they didn't change a thing."

Michelle caressed his face, "the first one did change a lot. It sent you to prison, where you could've been killed, and almost separated us forever."

"But it didn't and I'm just fine. It only made us stronger and if I had to, I'd do it all exactly the same again."

"I know. I love you so much."

"I love you too, so much. I also know you'd do the same thing and I want you to know, yet again, how proud I am of you and how lucky I feel to have such a strong wife."

Michelle smiled, "I'm glad you feel that way. I'm not sure I could do it again though, because it almost killed me. I'm so glad I won't have to."

"So am I," Tony replied, "especially because it all still bothers you so much, even though you made a right choice and nothing happened."

"It could've…"

"But it didn't," he smiled, kissing her. "We're both here, aren't we?"

"Yeah, we are," she smiled back, snuggling closer to him.

"I almost had a nervous breakdown while you were at Division on your own. I spent hours cleaning the house. See how spotless it is, I don't remember the last time our home was this clean, and look at my hands, they still have sponge marks on them."

"Awwww," she giggled and took his hands in hers, kissing them gently. "It does look unusually clean in here even though we do our best to keep it clean. I knew how worried you'd be the minute I left. I really didn't want to leave you on your own, but I had to. You have no idea how much I wish you were with me in there. It would've made all the difference in the world."

"I know you had to go and I wish I was there with you too."

"Well, I wanted it for more reasons than one. I knew you'd find a way to get yourself in trouble while I was away. If you were with me and I was in charge, I thought I'd be able to make sure you were safe, for a change, those were my wishes anyway. They sent me to CTU, you were there already and even though I was in charge, you ended up almost dying…"

"Baby, stop blaming yourself for what could've happened to me; we discussed this already. None of it is your fault. Besides, I couldn't keep you safe inside CTU when you went to that hotel. I knew, just like you did, that you were their best choice in there. There was nothing I could've done about it and I knew that, no matter how much I wanted you to stay with me and keep you protected. Just like you couldn't have stopped me from going anywhere they wanted me to. Besides, we both wanted to do it; we both wanted to help, didn't we?"

"Of course, I'm glad I went and helped in that hotel and you helped so much during this final day. Without either of us, things never would have worked out the way they did, during both situations. If we left Jack to handle everything on his own who knows what would've exploded," Michelle rolled her eyes jokingly.

"Exactly," Tony laughed, "but that's the whole problem with you and me. We have a bad habit of getting ourselves in trouble, because we like helping way too much and we liked our old jobs."

"Yeah, but things will change now… we changed our jobs; we'll never work there again and you have no idea how glad I am about it. I'm so happy it's all over and so excited about our new company. Now, all we need to do is find a way to stop ourselves next time we feel like helping in some dangerous situation."

"There won't be a next time. We're civilians now and our future business won't have anything to do with public security. I'll make sure we're safe and together forever," he wrapped his arms tightly around her, "…unless you decide to cook on the opening day of our store," he grinned.

Michelle laughed, "You just have to bring my cooking skills up each time, don't you?"

"You brought our first night together up and you showed your cooking skills to me for the first time on that very same night," he replied, kissing the top of her nose, "besides, I can't help myself. Each time I joke about it, I remember that first time you tried to cook and how cute you were when it all burned. I love teasing you with it because I know you don't mind and because each time I remember how happy we were from the start and how easy it was to fall in love with you."

"Of course I don't mind, I know you're not doing it to put me down, I love remembering it as much as you do. It was as easy to fall in love with you. I just find it so adorable how every time you remember that moment you tell me how cute I was."

"You were, so incredibly cute, just like you'll always be to me. And if I tell you how cute you are only in those moments, I'll have to do it more often," he smiled. "I could tell you didn't know how to cook, but you still wanted to do it for me."

"Well, we were staying in my apartment at that moment and it was only proper that the host cooks. Besides, I didn't hire you as my cook yet," she kissed him. "It was only a couple of hours after all those events that changed our lives and our relationship forever. You had an injured foot and you just found out you had termites in your apartment on top of everything. We were both exhausted from that entire situation and you were in no condition to cook for us."

"No, I wasn't. My foot was throbbing like crazy, I couldn't stay up anymore. I still think it would've been a better idea though," he laughed.

"Oh yeah, who knew I could do that to a frying pan and an omelet."

They both started laughing at that, "Thankfully we were able to order take out or we would've starved since your fridge was completely empty, aside from those eggs and cheese."

"I wasn't expecting any company and those eggs and cheese were enough for me. Who could have guessed I'd have you as my guest and for all that time too?

I'm so glad it went that way."

"Oh yeah, me too, I all of a sudden loved termites and wanted them to be in my apartment forever," Tony replied, making her giggle.

"I was supposed to go buy groceries after work, but after everything that happened shopping was last thing on my mind," she continued.

"Yeah, I know" he kissed her hair and wrapped his arms around her. "Who could think of shopping after all that hell? All those people who died, our friends and colleagues, and everything with your brother..."

"My brother… I still can't believe his wife took him back."

"Yeah, I know, it came as a shock to me too. I guess she saw he was genuinely sorry for leaving them."

"I guess so. I'm just glad he calmed down and is back with his family again. That year I took care of him was such a hell because he's an incredibly difficult man and everything with his wife and Carrie made him even worse. That day was complete hell… and I just needed him on top of it all," Michelle sighed.

"Yeah, it was complete hell. I wish none of it ever happened, all those people… There are good memories from it too though… you asked me out and we kissed for the first time. The whole situation moved our relationship to a whole new level... though I know I would've asked you out regardless, who knows how long it would've taken me on my own?"

"You were taking a hell of a long time to ask me out," Michelle rolled her eyes jokingly, making him kiss her. "I wish our relationship started thanks to some other, happier event, not with all that… but I'm glad something good came out of that day and I'm glad I sped it up," Michelle smiled.

"I couldn't be happier you did. You have no idea how glad I am I can think of our first kiss too and not just that hell when I remember that day."

"Me too, honey," she kissed him and leaned her head on his chest. "Speaking of my cooking… it did improve a bit over the years, didn't it?"

"Of course it did, I keep telling you that. I'm not afraid to try what you cook anymore," he grinned, making her laugh.

"Yeah, and you'll teach me how to cook even better, especially now when I don't work anymore. I'll go to Gianni and Gina with you every day and watch you cook. We finally have all the time in the world to do whatever we want."

"Yeah we do, and I can't wait to have you with me all day long. I'll be more than happy to teach you more, especially because I'm a patient teacher and you're my favorite student," Tony kissed her passionately. "Although I'm sure our kids will teach you a lot about cooking too," he grinned.

Michelle stuck her tongue at him jokingly and laughed. "If they become anything like you I'm sure they will, but if they become anything like me, we'll have to keep more fire extinguishers around."

Tony laughed, "If our babies do come one day, I would love nothing more than for them to be just like you in every single thing, because you're perfect just the way you are. I feel like the luckiest man on Earth and I will every day, for the rest of my life."

"You're pretty perfect yourself. No matter how much I want our kids one day, they would be an incredible blessing; I'll still be the happiest and luckiest person in the world, even if we remain on our own."

"So will I," Tony replied, wrapping his arms around her tightly, "there's nothing in the world I'll ever ask for. I have everything I need right here in my arms."

"So do I, I love you so much honey."

"I love you too sweetheart, so much."

Tony and Michelle remained snuggled up in their armchair for a long time, watching the rain fall over the ocean, knowing their life couldn't be any more perfect, just because they have each other.


End file.
